by Ivy Smoak
I looked up at James. “I just think that maybe you’re all sorry. And that there’s no reason to throw away a lifetime of friendship over a misunderstanding.”
“Well…if you accept my proposal, I guess I could forgive him.”
I rolled my eyes.
He groaned. “Don’t do that. I like it too much.”
I laughed. “When I roll my eyes?”
“So sexy.”
“You’re ridiculous.”
He laughed. “Yeah, but you like it.”
I shook my head. “Can we please focus?”
“Sure thing.” He tossed me his notebook.
I looked down at what James had written. Drop her off in the middle of nowhere. Take her clothes. Point a gun at her head. Threaten to kill her best friend. “Best friend” was scratched out with “minion.” Make her disappear? A chill ran down my spine. Matt had wanted me to be the bigger person. He didn’t want me to stoop to Isabella’s level. He’d said I was better than her. But God, I desperately wanted to make her disappear. And I was pretty sure the Hunters had the resources to make it happen.
I should have corrected James. Convinced him that I just wanted it to be a silly prank like I’d insisted before. But I just kept staring at the question mark after the word disappear. Like he was asking me for my permission. Like he was offering to do it for me.
And I wasn’t sure why, but I wrote down yes and then handed it back to him. His eyes locked with mine. For a second I’d forgotten that his life was just as tangled up in Isabella’s as mine. Maybe his mom just wanted him to marry a Pruitt because she liked Isabella. Or maybe it was more sinister like Isabella had said – that the Hunters owed my dad a debt. And they’d paid it with James’ future. Either way, Isabella was going to ruin both our lives. Unless we ruined hers first.
James raised his left eyebrow at me.
And I nodded.
“New plan,” James said. “I think we all know what we really want here.” He tossed his notebook to the side. “We want to make Isabella disappear for good. What do you say, Rob? Got something in your evil genius mind for that?”
“Now we’re talking.” Rob rubbed his hands together. “Oh! We’re going to need pizza for this. Nothing like pizza to plot murder.” He pulled out his phone and sent a text. “So what are we thinking, cheese or pepperoni?”
How could Rob think about what kind of pizza we wanted when he just said we wanted to kill someone? Disappear was different than kill. Right?
“Cheese sounds good,” James said. “Unless you want something else?” he asked me.
I shook my head. James wasn’t freaking out. Apparently he’d meant kill too.
“Perfect,” Rob said. “Cheese it is. Now how do you want to kill the troll?”
Chapter 13
Monday
Rob didn’t need to ask us our opinion. Because before we even had a chance to respond, he told us his whole plan. A plan that was clearly well thought out because it was so detailed. And graphic.
“The key is making sure every inch of her burns so that they can’t trace anything back to us,” Rob said. “Unless you’d rather use lye. But I really like the idea of fire. It seems like a more graceful way to end it, you know?”
I finally found my voice. “What the fuck, Rob?”
He started laughing. And then laughing some more. He pointed at me, barely even able to breathe. “You should see your face right now.”
How was I supposed to look after hearing that?
“Your pizza, young Robert,” someone said and poked his head through the hole in the floor of the treehouse.
I almost screamed. After hearing Rob’s murderous plan, it almost looked like the man’s decapitated head was on a platter.
“Thanks, Eric,” Rob said and grabbed it from him. “Could we have something to drink too?”
“Already on top of it, sir.” The butler slid a tray of sodas into the treehouse with his gloved hand. “Will that be all?”
“Yup.”
“Will you be attending classes after lunch?” Eric asked.
“Nah. We need the whole day off. We’ve had a stressful weekend. Right, James?”
James nodded.
“Very well. Let me know if any of you need anything else. Good to see you again, Miss Sanders.”
“You too.” I wasn’t sure what else to say. Help me, Rob’s a murdering psychopath probably wouldn’t work with his butler.
Eric disappeared down the hole.
“Pizza?” Rob asked and lifted up a slice.
“We can’t kill Isabella,” I said. “I just meant…make her go away.” Twenty four hours ago, I’d wanted her dead. But after talking to Matt… I swallowed hard. I didn’t want him to ever think I was a monster too.
Rob laughed. “I know. I just wanted to see your face. I like it when you blush. It’s so freaking cute.”
What?
“Like you’re doing right now.”
“You’re both ridiculous,” I said and shoved his arm.
“Mhm. You’re the one that can’t keep your hands off me. Do you need me to call Mr. Hill to put a ruler between us again?” He smiled. “See…blushing.”
I shook my head. “Okay, this has been super fun. But I really should get back to Matt’s house.”
“After lunch,” James said. “You need to eat.” He picked up a slice and handed it to me before I could protest. “Come on. You’ve lost weight the last few weeks. You gotta eat something.”
I pressed my lips together. He’d noticed that I’d lost weight after my uncle passed away? I looked down at my pajama bottoms. I wanted to blame it on the baggy material, but that wasn’t it. I’d been sad. It was hard to eat when all I wanted to do was cry. And then everything that happened between Matt and me on top of it? I’d barely had an appetite at all. I never would have guessed James would notice though.
“Please?” James asked. “We won’t make any more murder jokes. We’ll just plan a prank veering on the edge of revenge that may or may not make Isabella run away from home. I promise.”
“Yeah,” Rob said. “We’re not going to kill anyone. We aren’t Pruitts.” He lifted his hand for a high-five, but I just stared at him. “Suit yourself,” he said and grabbed a soda.
I ate my slice of pizza as they went back to the pudding idea.
“Matt has a really big kitchen,” I said. “It would be the perfect place to make that much pudding.” I could still fix this.
Rob laughed. “We’re going to buy it, Sanders. Who has time to make pudding?”
“I don’t know…most people?”
“You’re not thinking big enough,” he said. “We need a lot of pudding. And maybe some dead frogs. That way Isabella can’t kill them.”
Gross. “Where do you plan on getting dead frogs from?”
“She’s super uncreative,” Rob said and looked over at James.
“No,” James said. “She’s just too sweet to think as evilly as us. One of the many reasons I like her.”
Rob laughed, but I didn’t.
Enough was enough. I’d come here for two reasons, and the second was more important than revenge. “Okay, here’s the deal,” I said. “I will help with whatever plan that the three of us come up with if you both swear to stop messing with me with all this silly flirting,” I said.
“We’re not…” James started, but I cut him off.
“And after I help you pull off the most epic prank on Isabella ever, you have to try to make up with the Caldwells.”
Rob laughed. “I’m not down with either of those conditions. Especially the first one, Sanders.” He winked at me.
“Me either,” James said.
God, they were both infuriating. “You need me in order to get access to Isabella’s room. There’s no prank without me. And those are my conditions.”
“Ugh.” Rob grabbed another slice of pizza.
“Do we have a deal?” I asked and put my hand out for James to shake. I trusted him more than I tru
sted Rob. Rob would shout “just kidding” or something. James would make the deal.
“Deal on the second contingency,” James said. “I can’t make any promises on the first.”
“Fine.”
He placed his hand on top of mine instead of shaking it. And then Rob threw his hand on top of James’.
“Operation Disappearing Troll on three,” Rob said.
I laughed as they both threw their hands up and yelled, “Operation Disappearing Troll!”
“And if Isabella dies in the process, all the better,” Rob said.
“That’s not funny,” I said. But I laughed anyway just because he looked so excited.
“We’re basically planning on giving her a heart attack, so it’s a possibility,” added Rob. “Oh, should we do it right after Thanksgiving? Isabella’s always so happy during Thanksgiving break because all her evil relatives are in town.”
Evil relatives? I hadn’t even thought about my new extended family. Would they all be so horrible?
“Good thinking,” James said. “Besides, it gives us more time to plan.”
I wasn’t so sure more time with the two of them was a good thing.
“What the hell! Are you trying to get Donnelley and me killed?” Miller’s head had just popped up through the floor of the treehouse. His face looked so beat up that for just a second, I didn’t recognize him.
I jumped, knocking over Rob’s soda.
“Shit,” Rob said under his breath as he grabbed a napkin. “Who the hell are you?”
“Out,” Miller said, ignoring Rob. “Now.”
“Miller…” my voice caught in my throat. This was not at all the way I wanted to start our conversation.
“I swear, Miss Pruitt, if you don’t get out of this treehouse right now, I’ll tell your father that you can’t be trusted here.”
Miss Pruitt. I hated that he was calling me that. Even more than I hated the idea of having to leave the safety of Matt’s house. “I’m sorry,” I said to James and Rob. “I have to go.” Seeing Miller’s bruised face made tears well in my eyes. And the anger in his voice? I deserved it. But it still hurt me. I tried to scramble out of the treehouse before the tears started to fall.
This time James and Rob didn’t stop me with proposals or jokes or food. But James did put his hand on my shoulder right before I climbed down.
“Are you going to be okay with him?” he asked.
“Yeah. He’s my security guard.” I tried to wipe away my tears.
“Okay.” James searched my face like he was trying to figure out why I was crying.
I hoped he didn’t see the real reason.
“Well…call me if you need anything.”
I didn’t have James’ number. Which was for the best. I climbed down the little ladder. Miller was already walking through the Hunters’ perfectly manicured gardens.
“Wait!” I called.
Miller didn’t stop.
I tried to run after him but my feet hurt. Ow. “Miller!”
He just kept going.
Fuck. I pushed through a fence and tried to run again. Each step was worse than the one before. I stopped and pulled my foot out of my slipper. There was blood on the bottom of the bandage. “Miller,” I said, but he was already through some hedges into the neighbor’s lawn.
I took another step. I bit the inside of my lip as I made my way past a massive pool house. But as the back of Miller’s head grew farther and farther away, it felt like there was no point. I wasn’t going to catch up to him. And clearly he didn’t want to talk to me. Just reprimand me.
I sat down under a willow tree and let myself cry. Not for my stupid feet. But for my own stupidity. I hadn’t thought about putting Miller’s career in jeopardy by going with Rob. I had only been focused on fixing Matt’s friendships. But not thinking about Miller was selfish. He’d been there for me when I needed him. And by the look of his face, he needed me now. Instead of seeking him out, I just made his day a million times more stressful by disappearing.
I pulled my knees into my chest. I couldn’t seem to get anything right recently. I just kept hurting people over and over again. Before I lost my uncle, I thought I was finally getting my life under control again. But when he died, it was like everything crumbled around me. And I was so tired of hurting all the time. And doing the hurting.
I wasn’t sure how long I sat there crying before I heard Miller clear his throat.
I looked up at his bruised face. I wanted to hug him and somehow make it better. Instead, I hugged my knees closer to my chest. “I’m so sorry.”
“Are you kidding me?”
I started crying harder. Those words were inadequate. And we both knew it. “I never meant to hurt you.”
“You never meant to hurt me?” his voice was harsh. “So dancing with all those guys at homecoming was supposed to make me feel good?”
“Miller…”
“I thought you cared about me.”
“I do care about you.”
“This isn’t caring.” He gestured back and forth between us. “This is you rubbing your new relationship in my face when I’m the only one in your life actually trying to protect you.”
The only one in my life trying to protect me? What did he mean by that? “But my dad…”
“Your dad?” He put “dad” in air quotes. “Who the fuck do you think did this to my face? I let you out of my sight for a few minutes and he had someone beat the shit out of me.”
I swallowed hard. I thought that might have been what happened. “I’m so sorry,” I said again, because I didn’t know what else to say.
“Are you, Brooklyn? Because you haven’t asked me anything about what happened that night. I woke up in a supply closet after your crazy fucking sister injected me with some sedative. I was scared out of my mind when I woke up. Not for myself. Scared for you. And meanwhile you were just fine dancing the night away with Matt.”
“Fine? I wasn’t fine. Isabella abandoned me in the city in just my underwear! I had to run miles to find the hotel. I was terrified. I am terrified.” The tears started back up. “I’m still not fine. And I wanted to talk to you right away. But you called me Miss Pruitt…”
“I have to be professional around Donnelley. And everyone else. If Mr. Pruitt finds out I was the one you were sneaking around with… Look what he already did to me, Brooklyn. He’ll fucking kill me.”
“I thought you were calling me Miss Pruitt because you were mad.”
“Of course I’m mad!” He looked up at the sky for a second and took a deep breath. “Fuck,” he groaned. “I really cared about you, kid.” He lowered his head and locked eyes with me.
Kid. His nickname felt like a knife in the chest. “And I meant what I said…I still care about you.”
“Then what the hell is on your hand?” he asked.
I looked down at the diamond on my ring finger. How could I explain this to him? I cared about him. But love? I loved Matt. I only loved him. “I’m sorry, Miller. I…”
“Don’t. I don’t need to know why you chose him. I don’t need the whole it’s me not you speech. I’m not an idiot.” He ran his hand down his face. “If you want to be part of this world, that’s fine. But I’m not going to let myself get killed because of you. I’m done.”
Done? I cringed and pulled myself to my feet. “What do you mean done?”
“I can’t be your security guard. I can’t watch you every day with him. Don’t make me do that, Brooklyn.”
I blinked fast, forcing my tears not to start again. I couldn’t make him stay. But I hated that he had to go. “Okay.”
He reached out and touched the side of my face. “I’m sorry.”
For a second I just stared at him. “What are you sorry for?” I was the one that had ruined us.
“I shouldn’t have left you during the dance. This is all my fault. I’m so fucking mad at you right now. But I’m even madder at myself.” He leaned down and scooped me up into his arms. “I know you’r
e hurt. I’m sorry I made you run after me.”
I didn’t blame him for any of that. I was just sorry that he was quitting because of me. He needed this money for school. And despite what he said, all of this was my fault, not his. It was my fault he’d walked away from me during the dance. It was my fault he was hurting. All of this was my fault.
“Couldn’t you stay?” I asked. “And just be assigned to someone else?”
“I think I need a fresh start, kid,” he said.
Okay. I rested my head against his chest and breathed in his familiar scent. I knew I’d needed to end things between us. I just didn’t know it would make me feel like I was sinking all over again.
Miller carried me all the way back to Matt’s. He carried me through the house, up the stairs, and to what I assumed was the guest room I was supposed to be staying in. He put me down on the edge of the bed.
There were boxes scattered around the room.
“What is all this stuff?” I asked.
“Some of the new clothes Justin sent over for you. And a few things that weren’t damaged.” Miller opened up one of the boxes. “I knew you’d want these back.” He pulled out my mom’s blue dress and my Keds.
“What?” I stood up. “How?”
“I went back to get them for you. I know how much this dress and these shoes mean to you.”
Instead of taking the dress out of his hands, I threw my arms around him. “Thank you. For everything. For taking care of me when I had no one else. For being my shoulder to cry on.”
He placed a kiss on my forehead and unwound my arms from his waist. “Take care, kid.”
My heart wasn’t as healed as I wanted to believe. Because it felt like it just ripped down the middle as Miller walked out of the room and out of my life.
But I knew a broken heart kept beating. Mine seemed to ache all the time, but I was still here. Ow. I pressed my hand to my chest. It would eventually stop hurting. It had to.
Chapter 14
Monday
Mrs. Caldwell was humming at the stove. By the smell of cinnamon in the air, I was beginning to understand why Matt always smelled like scrumptious dessert. As much as my stomach wanted me to stay, I’d been trying to get Matt away from the dinner table for what felt like hours. Apparently Matt and Mason always did their homework sitting at the kitchen table together. It was wonderful that there was so much family time in this house. But not when I needed to tell Matt about this afternoon.
