She felt it as she looked around the house after the police arrived. Things were happening. People were talking to one another, and she was alone and bewildered and she had to slide her emotional armor back into place in order to cope.
“Were you aware that you were under threat before you arrived at the property today?”
“Yes and no. I had a small accident the week before and Rex was concerned. In fact, we didn’t stay here last weekend.” She pieced it all together as she spoke, realizing that he had indeed been trying to protect her all along. “I came up from London today because it was the anniversary of my mother’s death. Rex met me at the church. On the way to the house, he was trying to warn me, but it was already too late.”
“Did you know this woman, Olivia Fordyce?”
Carmen shook her head. “No, I’d never heard of her before today.”
Rex had known all along, though; he said she was the reason his parents split up. “I’m sure that Rex can shed more light than I.”
The constable went over the details of the actual attack, checking each point with her before ticking it off. She watched as he made notes. At one point she heard the ambulance leaving the property, the lights that had been flashing outside the sitting room window fading away.
Mrs. Summerfield appeared at the door.
“I’m making tea for everyone,” she called in. “How do you take yours, Jim?”
The constable nodded and waved. “Two sugars please, Mrs. Summerfield.”
Carmen looked from one to the other. There was something stoic about people who lived in this part of the world. It was the village life, because they knew one another so well, that in times of calamity it was all hands on deck.
When she signed the statement she rose to her feet and took a deep breath. “I’ll fetch that tea for you.”
Rex was standing beneath the crescent stairs in the hallway, demonstrating his actions to an officer. As she passed, he paused and locked his arm around her waist, drawing her in against him. “You okay?”
Carmen stared at him and felt as if her chest wrenched apart inside.
It was the same concern she’d witnessed all week, and yet she’d been unable to place it, mistaking it for a greedy possessiveness and his hunger for power over her. It made her knees weak to experience it now, knowing that he’d been so worried about her.
Despite the tenderness in him, the secret legacy that had surrounded them all these years pressed down on her as she looked up at his handsome face. It was a legacy of jealousy they’d been left, a trail of bitterness and betrayal. Their family history had been hounded by ill fortune long before her mother’s car crash. They were doomed to unhappiness, all of them. Falling in love with Rex was a cruel twist of fate, and the last straw.
“I’m okay,” she managed. “I’m still angry with you, though.”
“We’ll talk, soon.” He let her go and returned to the conversation with the two police officers he was dealing with.
Talk soon?
I can’t. Not yet.
* * *
FINALLY THE POLICE were done. Rex quickly tracked Carmen down in the kitchens, where she was talking with Mrs. Summerfield.
As soon as he entered the room he noticed that Mrs. Summerfield was comforting Carmen. She was bound to be upset, Rex knew that, but the look on their faces gave him a bad feeling.
Mrs. Summerfield took off her apron. “I’ll leave you two alone now. I’ll be back in the morning.”
The resigned look on the cook’s face worried him even more. Was it just the events of the day, or was it something else?
Once she’d gone, he strode to Carmen’s side and held her. For a few moments she clung to him.
“We’re safe to stay here tonight, now they’re under lock and key.” How long that would last was another question, but for now they could breathe easy.
Carmen pulled free of him. “No, I’m leaving, too.”
Rex was dumbfounded. “Leaving? Now?”
“Yes, now.” She picked up her handbag from the table and walked away quickly. He followed her, hanging on every word as she continued.
“While you were dealing with the police I arranged for a taxi to call at nine-thirty.” She paused in the hallway and glanced at her watch. “It’ll be here any moment. The last train for London leaves Beldover at ten.”
Rex closed the space between them in four long strides and wrapped his hands around her shoulders. “There’s no need to be concerned. We can be together now, we can relax.”
“Rex, it’s over. The house. You and me. Everything.” She glanced around the hallway and then back to him.
He saw the resignation in her eyes and it cut him up inside. Her lashes were damp, a smudge of mascara darkening her lower lids. He couldn’t bear it. “I want you to stay. I thought you loved being here.”
“I do love the house. And what you’ve given me these past weeks—” she paused and inhaled deeply “—I’ll be forever grateful for what you introduced me to. That side of myself that I was unaware of.”
Unaware of? Rex struggled to accept what she was saying. All of it.
“I need time out to get my head together. I need to get my life back on track.” She broke free of his grasp.
Rex stared at the back of her head when she turned away.
She was still talking. “You found out what you needed to know. You really do care about the place, after all. You fought for it, you protected it. It’s yours. You’re the new custodian of Burlington Manor.”
“No. Not without you.”
She turned back, shook her head. “It won’t work. Can’t you see that? We were doomed before we even started. That should have been obvious to us even before all this horrible history came out. But come out it has. The sins of the fathers, Rex.” Her eyes flashed. “False expectations and secrets kept us apart years ago when we might have had a natural relationship. When we came back here there was so much we didn’t know about the past. Hell, there is still so much that we don’t know.”
The haunted look in her eyes angered him. He wanted to push the shadows away, but if she left now that wouldn’t happen. “But the danger is over.”
“I know, and I thank you for all you did to protect me—I see it all now. But it’s like a curse. We were nearly killed because of the history here.”
He shook his head vehemently. “We were nearly killed because my father kept a crazy nutjob for a mistress.”
“But don’t you see. You found out you have two half brothers of Charles Carruthers’s blood. They were cut out. I wasn’t. They have more right to this place than I do. From what you’ve said this week, it was only your father’s guilt about keeping us apart that puts me here at all.”
“That’s not the case.”
“It’s why two men felt they had to take action. They were owed. That’s what she said.”
“They tried to hurt you. They’re getting fuck all!” His self-control was slipping away.
She swiped back her hair. “Rex, my mother died here. For all I know she could have been a victim of that mad bitch.”
Rex was stunned. It hadn’t even occurred to him, even though Carmen had expressed doubts about the car accident. The possibilities roared in on him, making his mind reel. Could it be true? “If that’s the case I’ll get to the bottom of it.” If it was the last thing he ever did, he’d answer that question. “I will find out the truth. I promise you that.”
“Don’t you think that’s enough tragedy for a person to bear? For crying out loud, Rex, you’ve got two neglected half brothers you didn’t even know about. That’s going to take some time to come to terms with. I can see that, even if you can’t.”
“Okay, we all need time, but if you love the house we can work at it and live here.”
“No.”
>
“Why the hell not?”
“Because we’re cursed to be unhappy. We proved it this very night. My mother loved your father. She gave everything to him and this place and look where it got her. A lonely grave, and your father grieving while his bitter mistress plotted against us all.”
Once again the need to protect and cherish her pumped hard in his blood. He snatched her against him, one hand at the small of her back pressing her fully to him, the other cupping the back of her head as he kissed her heavily, trying to make her see, trying to kiss the denial out of her.
She was tense in his arms, rigid and fiercely resistant, but her lips softened and he felt her give, just for a moment.
Then she pulled away. Her eyes were luminous. She wanted him—he could see that, he could feel it—but she was resisting him more now than she ever had.
If they had time apart, she might withdraw again. She would become that elegant but fiercely independent woman that he’d seen across his father’s grave. It had been so much effort on his part to undo her tightly guarded ways and encourage the sensual woman to reveal herself. After all that, he couldn’t take the risk that she would walk away and forget him. I love this woman. “We can get past it. All of it. Please don’t walk away.”
“I’m sorry, I can’t stay. Nothing ever works out for this family, and it’s the same for us. We’re only here doing this because we wanted each other years ago. Like you said, we had to burn it out. There was only one way.”
“It never went away, and you know it.”
“Maybe not yet, but it will. Now you’ve had what you wanted you’ll soon get bored with the whole situation.”
He shook his head. “That’ll never happen.”
He’d never been more sure of anything. “God knows I don’t have a good track record, but that’s because it was always you in my head! It’s always been you that I wanted.”
She stared up at him and her lower lip trembled.
“I would dedicate my life to making you happy,” he said, and stroked his hand down the length of her hair. “Carmen, I will make this right.”
She shook her head. “You’re better to start fresh with a new life, a new woman, not someone who reminds you of all the past mistakes that were made here.”
“I don’t want that, and I can tell that you don’t mean that.”
“I do mean it. I think Burlington Manor deserves a fresh start, not two people who are totally screwed up by their past.”
“Fuck the past!”
She shook her head and pulled away. “We can’t ignore it, not after everything that’s happened.”
“Okay, we can’t ignore it, but together we can get past it. You love this house and I’ll only be happy with you here. We can make it work. Carmen, you have to be part of it.”
She paused, looked back.
“I can’t do it without you,” he stated.
“That’s blackmail.”
“No, it’s the honest to God truth.”
She seemed to teeter on the edge, visibly torn.
The sound of tires on the gravel and headlights flashing through the windows on either side of the front door told him time was short. Carmen looked back, alerted to the presence of the taxi.
“I forbid you to leave,” Rex blurted, his entire being opposed to the idea. It was a crazy move, but he couldn’t help himself. He was desperate.
“This isn’t a game, not anymore. And I’m not a possession you can order about, not now.” She gave him a sidelong glance and it held a warning. “It’s time to say goodbye.”
She stared at him, determination and sadness showing in her expression.
He gritted his teeth, massaged his temples and forced himself to face up to everything that had happened in the past few hours. He had to get some form of compromise from her. “So, you need time out, a break away from the house. I understand that. It’s been hard on us both, but that doesn’t mean we have to lose what we have.”
“What do we have?” She looked at him, leveling him as she asked the question.
“You said it yourself—it’s been great between us. I want to be with you.” He heard it in his own voice, the sound of a relieved laugh, and wondered why it had been so hard to say that. What had started as an interesting challenge had become so much more. “We’ve been through so much.”
“That’s it exactly. There’s no need to put ourselves through any more.”
It wasn’t what he wanted to hear. I want you, I want you. The words echoed around his mind. The weight in his chest grew heavier, leaving him thwarted and angry.
“It won’t always be like this, you have to see that.” This was tearing him apart inside. He gripped her shoulders tightly.
She tried to wrench free.
“I can’t let you go.”
“You have to.”
“I won’t!” His grip on her tightened, his anger and denial a swelling tide that obscured everything but his goal.
Color flamed across her cheekbones and her eyes looked wild with anger. “Boo, damn it! Boo!”
Rex froze, as did she. The safe word. She’d used it, after all.
Her eyes glittered with tears.
He could hear the sound of his own angry heartbeat in his ears, the physical evidence of his volatility shattering the silence.
“Boo,” she repeated in a strangled whisper, and a tear fell to her cheek.
Rex released her. It was the hardest thing he’d ever done. “Fine. Go, then. But you’ll be back.”
“For more of your fun and games? Is that what you think—that you can wish it all away with a session in the sack?”
“I know it’ll take more than that. Give me a chance to prove it.”
She put her finger to his lips. “Please. If you care for me at all, allow me some space.”
He covered her hand with his, turned his face into her palm where he kissed her briefly. “I’ll agree, but only because I want you back.”
She stared at him a moment longer, eyes glistening, and then walked away. He followed her to the door and watched as she climbed into the taxi.
Feeling like a condemned man, he slammed his hands against the top of the door frame. As the car turned away, he caught his last glimpse of her.
I bought tickets to Paris, he thought as he turned away and paced up and down the hallway. He had to stop himself from jumping in the Maserati and chasing her down to announce what he’d planned.
She needed time alone. She’d hate him for not respecting that.
If only I’d done it earlier. He’d been so wrapped up in making the most of the situation between them, wielding the manor as his bargaining tool, that he forgot how to do things properly. By the time he’d realized that he should be courting her, it was too late.
“This bloody house,” he muttered, and glared around the walls of the hallway, resenting the place. He thought it was a chance for them to be together, but now that it had unveiled the secrets of the past, he wanted to tear it down brick by brick. The urge to pick up that weapon he’d used earlier and smash the carved banisters to smithereens was overwhelming.
But something stopped him. Reason. Carmen still loved this place, and deep down he did, too. It’s our home.
He turned back to the door. Gripping the frame he stared at the fading lights on the taxi. “You belong here at Burlington Manor, Carmen Shelby. I’ll show you that it’s meant to be.”
Carmen was the heart of this place for him. She always had been.
And she’s everything I ever wanted and always will be.
It was time to pull out all the stops.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
AFTER THREE DAYS of hell, Rex’s emotions finally crystallized. He knew what he wanted and how to get it, and he believed his thought
s and actions would now be more precise and considered. Which was just as well, he reflected, because he was currently in a court of law.
He stared across the Oxford Crown Court room at the dock, where Olivia and her two sons awaited their initial hearing. Just seeing them again made his blood boil. Justice would be done. The date for the trial would be set by the end of this session and the prosecution barrister had assured him that all three would be held in custody until the time of their court case.
Olivia looked every bit as prim and proper as when he’d first met her. Her gaze was set in the middle distance and her expression showed distaste, as if she was above it all and saw no reason for her incarceration. Rex shook his head. That was some delusion she’d woven for herself.
He still found it hard to accept that the two men in the dock were his half brothers, but when he studied Charles he saw the likeness to their father. Charles stared back at him, steely eyed. Only Jason, the younger man—the one who’d had the damn cheek to obtain employment at the manor—looked suitably penitent. With head lowered and loose hair hanging down around his face he made a sorry picture.
At least one of them had the decency to look ashamed.
“Court in session, all rise,” the usher announced.
The judge entered and took his seat.
Despite his intention to make Olivia and her sons feel his wrath across the courtroom, Rex glanced repeatedly at the entrance in the hope that Carmen would appear. She wanted nothing to do with it, yet he couldn’t stop looking for her. Even while the prosecution and defense presented their statements his attention was divided. It had been the hardest three days of his life. The deep, profound need to contact her was unremitting. Even though he’d been working around the clock—his time divided between negotiating with Nikhil Rashid and pursuing the investigation into Sylvia Shelby’s death—his thoughts had never been far from Carmen.
The Burlington Manor Affair Page 28
