by Izzy Shows
Grayson made as if to stand as well, and I assumed he meant to come with me, to enthrall me. But before he could stand, the young vampire interrupted him.
"If you would remain, sire," he said.
The look on Grayson's face said he would rather not, but he sat down again.
I wanted to stay, to soothe him, but I knew better. I had been dismissed.
2
Nina
One of the guards walked with me through the castle, as silent as a statue. Not that I tried to talk to him, really. I wouldn't know the first thing to say to a random vampire who probably hated me as much as any of the Council members did.
He must be rather important to be allowed to listen in on Council sessions, but not important enough to actually sit on the Council and give his opinion. I wondered what his rank was, but I didn't ask.
He probably wouldn't tell me, anyway. That wasn't the thing you shared with a thrall, let alone with a prisoner.
Which was what I was, even if I had free roam of the castle, for the most part.
That idea left a bad taste in my mouth, but I hadn't put much thought into it yet. I couldn't--I was still on display, walking humbly along with a vampire to God only knew where.
Luckily, the others we passed didn't seem to think much of it. There were a few nods here and there, a few bows and curtsies from those who were ranked under me. It still surprised me that, as the King's thrall, I ranked higher than some of the vampires, but that was the way their hierarchy worked.
And then there were the knowing looks from some of the men. The men I'd fought with, saved from certain death, the ones who knew what I was.
They had been sworn to secrecy by now, I was sure. The Council didn't want it getting out that they had allowed a blood mage to live, to be free for the most part.
The looks in these men's eyes told me they didn't like it one bit, but they wisely kept their mouths shut.
"Look who it is." A familiar high-pitched voice grated against my ears.
Kati.
I looked up to see the blonde woman, another thrall, smirking at me.
"We missed you at breakfast," she said, but her tone said otherwise.
She wasn't very good at the political game, either, but at least she tried. She wanted desperately to be important here. Why didn't she understand that, to the vampires, she was nothing more than an animal for them to eat? She would be so much better off putting her effort elsewhere, but she didn't see that.
"I missed you all as well," I said with a polite smile. "I was unwell."
She flicked her gaze down my body, taking in the tattered state of my dress. "Uh-huh."
My cheeks colored, though I was sure the color wouldn't be very obvious against the natural tan of my skin. I didn't have an excuse for my current state of dress, but, thankfully, I didn't need one.
"If you will excuse us, Miss Dickens, the lady is needed elsewhere," the vampire who'd been escorting me said stiffly.
I had never been so relieved to have a vampire beside me.
"Of course," she said, ducking her head demurely. "My apologies."
But she glanced up at me as she walked away, pure hatred in her eyes.
I didn't know what I'd done to earn her ire--at first, it had seemed that she hated me because Grayson hadn't touched me, hadn't enthralled me like everyone else did with the girls they Chose, but her feelings were too deep for that. There had to be something else going on, but I didn't know what it could be.
The vampire cleared his throat, and I looked up to see an expectant look in his eyes. He nodded forward.
Oh, right. We were supposed to be walking.
I started off again, and he quickened his step so that he would remain slightly in the lead.
Good. I didn't know where I was going.
The rest of the trip passed with little consequence; no one else interrupted us, and at last we arrived in front of a set of doors that I knew had to lead to a suite inside.
We were in the hallway where the royal suites--for Grayson and his mother--were, along with the ones that housed the Council members and a few of the highest-ranking vampires. I didn't know what we were doing here, because the door we were standing in front of wasn't Grayson's suite, which was where I lived.
The vampire produced a key and opened the door, pushed it open, then handed me the key.
"These are your chambers now, Miss," he said, his tone still as stiff as ever.
"I don't understand," I said, frowning. "Why am I being moved?"
"You heard the Council."
Oh.
I wasn't allowed to be near Grayson. But I hadn't actually thought they'd go so far as to move me from his rooms.
I wanted to talk to him...
"Right, of course," I said. "So, I'm here on my own?"
"Yes, Miss. This is your suite now. They selected this suite so that if there is a disturbance, you will be in reach of the King."
He said it like it was for my own protection; if there was danger, Grayson would be able to get to me. But I knew what he really meant. If I created a problem, Grayson would be able to sense it through the thrall bond, and he'd be able to find me and stop whatever I was doing before I could cause any issues.
I was a prisoner, even if it was a pretty cell.
"All right, well, thank you for walking with me," I said, forcing a smile.
He nodded, then gestured for me to go inside.
Inside my cell.
I strode in, then, with another bright smile for the guard, I shut the door and leaned back against it, letting the air rush out of my lungs.
Alone, at last.
As much as I wanted to talk to Grayson about everything that had happened, to find out if he still hated me for lying to him, I was grateful to be alone for even a second. It had been one thing after another since Grayson was attacked by the hybrid, which felt like ages ago now, and I was exhausted.
I looked around the room and saw that it was quite nice, well-furnished, and even had some artwork on the walls. It was, of course, nowhere near as nice as Gray's suite, but that was to be expected.
My own suite.
I'd had my own room at Conall's compound, too, which was abnormal. The wolves normally shared rooms, but no one wanted to share with me. They all hated me, even though Conall had rescued me from the dungeon and had hand-selected me to be trained as a hunter.
Another abnormality. All the hunters were wolves, except for me. But that was because there were no other blood mages outside the dungeon.
You mean like the family you left to rot in there when he took you away.
The thought intruded sharply, bringing a gasp of pain with it. I didn't think about that, not ever.
I couldn't bear to live with the guilt that came with it.
I looked around at the objects in the room again and tried to find something nice to focus on, but nothing attracted me.
In spite of all its niceties, it was just like every 'home' I'd ever known. Like the room in Conall's compound, it was just another cell. I'd traded one jailor for another when Conall rescued me, and I'd done it again by returning to the vampires.
Loyalty apparently meant nothing when your life was on the line, and neither did freedom.
I would always be a prisoner.
3
Grayson
She would always be a distraction, it seemed. That damned little blood mage got under my skin in ways I couldn't quite comprehend. Her tawny skin, her brown eyes and hair--they bewitched me, body and soul. Her diminutive stature, deceptively hiding lithe muscles, called to the protective instinct inside me. She looked so fragile, so breakable, but inside she was stronger than any steel I'd ever seen.
She'd demonstrated that today when she'd made her case before the Council. Not once did she break down and beg; not once did she compromise herself or allow her emotions to overcome her. She'd been calm, in control, the entire time.
I couldn't help but admire that about her, and to my dismay
, the act of admiring her had distracted me from focusing on anything the Council members said during the meeting--except for the part where they said I couldn't see her again.
The thought of that brought my blood to a boil again.
I didn't want to see her again, of course.
She's a blood mage. She betrayed me. I don't want anything to do with her.
That was the truth of the matter, never mind that everything about her called to my very soul. I didn't want to be near her, I didn't want to talk to her, and I certainly didn't want to forgive her.
But I also didn't like having my actions dictated to me, which was something of a surprise. My entire life had been dictated. I had never truly had a say in anything I'd ever done. That was the life of royalty--a life of service to my people.
That was the way it had always been, and I'd known that as far back as I could remember.
It had never been a problem, not before her. But she'd changed everything, somehow.
"Grayson?" My mother spoke, her voice soft and gentle.
"Yes, Mother?" I turned my attention to her, eyebrows raised.
"I told you he wasn't paying attention," Isaiah sneered, looking quite like the cat that had eaten the canary.
With a heavy sigh, I sat up a little straighter and fixed him with the full force of my gaze--which promptly had him looking properly abashed and unable to hold my gaze.
"I am perfectly capable of heeding the needs of the Council, Isaiah," I said. "I have been doing it for considerably longer than you."
The young Council member was everything a vampire shouldn't be: greedy, impatient, and reckless. He desired power above all else--I could see that in him--and he was heedless of the consequences that his actions might incur. He didn't play any sort of long game, but rather seized on any opportunity that appeared in the moment.
"You seemed rather distracted throughout the proceedings," he muttered, still unable to look at me.
Pathetic.
"I assure you, if I appeared in any way distracted, it was only because I was weighing the words the blood mage was speaking to determine what truth could be found in them," I said, though in truth I was a little defensive.
I didn't need any of them pointing out that she had distracted me. I knew in my gut already that she was a problem I couldn't quite be rid of. For as much trouble as she caused, I didn't want to see her go.
I didn't want her out of my sight for so much as a second, much less the eternity the Council had seemed to have in mind when they'd banned her from seeing me.
Thinking of that again had me seeing red, and I had to concentrate on my breathing for a minute in order to calm myself.
"That aside, it's time for another order of business," my mother said, her voice gentle as ever, as if she were speaking to an animal that might spook at the wrong word.
If she's speaking like this, that means it's something I won't like.
That thought brought a new bout of nerves with it. It had my stomach clenching with anxiety as I tried to predict what might come next.
"You asked me to stay. Do go on and tell me what that's about," I said, my calm tone disguising the turmoil within.
"You promised to take a mate," she said.
"Yes, you said you would do that," another Council member said.
The others chimed in, reminding me of what I had promised and leaving no doubt that I would have to follow through.
Gods, I don't want to do this.
The very idea of taking a mate made my gut churn. It was a disgusting concept to me, one I had always pushed back and back and back, with the hope that it would never come to pass.
I knew that was ludicrous, that eventually I would have to take a mate, as all vampires did--as a good King should. The fate of our race depended on me mating and producing an heir that the life force of the race could be passed on to, who would secure the lives of our people and not leave them fearing that if something happened to me, they would all be dead.
At the moment, I was all that kept them alive, and I had no heir to ease their minds. I had to mate, had to produce that heir, no matter how much I loathed the thought.
It's not just taking a mate that you despise, it's the idea of touching a woman other than her.
A nasty voice from the back of my mind sneered at me, reminding me of my weakness, but I refused to acknowledge it.
"I don't think that now is the appropriate time to be handling this," I said uneasily. "We have just been attacked. We should be organizing a task force to determine the nature of the creatures that attacked us, and why they attacked. We should be preparing our forces for a counterattack, and we should be focusing on the blood mage we have just secured on our side. Now is not the time to worry about my mating."
"Oh, it's exactly the time," Isaiah said. "Because if you don't take a mate now, while all this is going on, if something happens to you in the ensuing attacks, we would have no heir to take your place. No, this is when it's most important."
"I agree with Isaiah," my mother said sympathetically. "It's important that this be handled quickly. And besides, a mate will be a blessing to you, son. Someone you can lean on in the hard times, who will understand your soul better than you do yourself."
"A blessing all vampires hope for," Isaiah echoed her. "Unless, of course, there's some other reason you're so hesitant to undertake this search."
The meaning of his words was clear, and my mother sucked in a shocked gasp at the audacity that had been required to say them--a challenge that could not be ignored. He meant to say there was someone who was keeping me from wanting to find another. Someone like Nina.
"Nothing impedes my ability to find a mate," I said firmly. "Nothing other than the immediate concern I have for the dangers that stalk our people."
"Dangers that could be mitigated by you producing an heir."
"Of course," I said, and clenched my teeth together after I spoke.
She means nothing to me. Nothing at all. She is not the reason I don't wish to mate. I can take a mate, just you watch.
Who was I trying to convince? Myself, or the Council?
"I will begin the search to take a mate."
"Oh, thank heavens!" My mother said, pressing a hand to her chest. "This is so exciting. I cannot wait to start the planning. Oh, the balls we'll throw! I have so much to do, so much to plan. It will be absolutely perfect. Nothing less for my son."
She was beaming at me, clearly pleased and excited to finally be able to do this for me--to finally find a mate for her son and have the grandchildren she had longed for for so long.
I should be happy to give this to her, to provide her with such happiness. She was my mother, and she had sacrificed for me time and time again. Just a short time ago, her life been in danger, and she had almost been taken from me. It should have been my great pleasure to give her anything that would make her smile when she might be overcome with memories of what had almost happened.
So, why, then, did it leave me with a sinking feeling in the pit of my gut to know that this was to be my fate? Mated to someone I probably would have no feelings for?
That isn't how mating works, and you know it. Your mind will align with that of the female chosen for you by the divine, your equal in every way. The other half of your soul. You will know it the second you lay eyes on her, and your heart will beg for you to be near her. That's how it always is for vampires. That's how it has always has been, and of course it will happen for you just as it has happened for others. It hasn't happened yet only because you've avoided the search for so long--because you haven't allowed yourself to be near any unmated female.
It was true that I had kept my distance from the unmated females on purpose, to avoid such a thing, but I had a hard time believing that I would feel anything for anyone...
Because someone else has stirred feelings inside you?
I gritted my teeth. Damn it, why did this keep happening? Why did these thoughts continue to torment me?
&nbs
p; It was impossible to believe that Nina had stirred anything other than lust inside of me, and even that was...unnatural. It was well-known that very few vampires were capable of feeling anything at all, even lust, for anyone other than their mate. That was one of the reasons the humans continued to volunteer for thralling--because they didn't fear being sexually abused by vampires.
It just means I'm one of the few who can feel such a thing. It's not impossible, just rare. Likely, if I had allowed myself to be near the unmated females, this would have already happened with others, and I wouldn't be so surprised by it happening with Nina.
That made me feel much better. It was probably something that would have been a common occurrence for me if I had allowed it to happen.
And yet, that voice kept niggling at the back of my mind.
What vampire have you heard of who, rare though it is, has not only lusted for one who is not their mate, but lusted for one who is not a vampire?
No, no, it wouldn't do to think about that at all.
I stood up abruptly, knowing that if I continued to sit here while the Council prattled on about my presentation balls and the guest lists they would have to compile and all the other nonsense associated with this business, I would allow myself to sink further into the hole of thinking about Nina.
And I didn't need to think about her anymore, because she meant nothing to me.
I would keep repeating that as many times as was necessary.
"Grayson? Where are you going?"
"To enthrall the blood mage," I said, my voice rough to my own ears. I had to be careful, had to calm down; it wouldn't do to break decorum and let them know how close my emotions were to the surface. "Is it not imperative that this happen as soon as possible, so that we have a hold on her?"
"Well, of course it is..."
"But we should observe," Isaiah said firmly. "It is a matter that concerns this Council."
"No," I said. My voice softened to a dangerous degree, and the inherent threat in my tone was enough to pale the faces of the Council members. "We have always respected the privacy of a thralling, and on this you will not break tradition."
