by Amy Patrick
It seemed appropriate for the moment in every possible way.
“This is where I’ll say goodbye,” Dad said. “I think you should go in and make your peace with Josiah and then... then it’s best you leave Lancaster County.”
The disbelief was almost overwhelming now.
“And go where? I don’t even know the woman who bit me. I don’t know where to look for this new ‘community’ you mentioned. How will I live? Where will I sleep?”
My father opened his billfold and extracted a stack of paper money.
“Here. Use this to stay in a hotel and buy food until you find them. I will miss you Abigail,” he said in a voice scratchy with emotion. “You were a good daughter.”
Were.
Feeling like I was in a dream, I took the money and stuffed it into my skirt pocket. I climbed down from the buggy, took one last look at the man who’d raised me, then turned and walked through the sliding glass doors into the bright, busy emergency department.
“May I help you, hon?” a woman called to me from behind a high desk. “Are you okay? Do you need to be seen?”
“Be seen?” I asked in confusion, still dazed by the fact I’d been ex-communicated by my own father. Who was clearly afraid of me.
“Do you need to see a doctor? There’s blood on your clothing. Are you hurt?”
“Oh. No. I’m... fine,” I mumbled. “But my friend is here. I think. Josiah Yoder? Can you check and see where he is?”
“Sure. I can see if he’s been admitted.” She typed on a keyboard, peering intently at the screen before her. “Oh yes. He came in last night. Car accident—but I guess you know that already. He’s in the ICU now. They limit visitors, though.”
“Was anyone else brought in from that accident? Another young guy?”
My shaky memories contained images of Reece’s face and an overturned red sportscar engulfed in flames. But I also felt sure I’d seen him run away from the crash scene. It was all a jumbled mess in my mind.
“No. I’m afraid Josiah Yoder is the only one who uh... survived the accident,” the woman said.
Studying my face for a few seconds, hers softened. “You know what? Why don’t you go on up to the nurses’ station on Floor Six? Talk to the charge nurse there. Maybe they’ll let you in to see him for just a few minutes. The elevator is right around that corner there.”
I thanked her and walked in the direction she pointed, finding the bank of elevators and pushing the glowing button to summon one.
I’d never been in a hospital before, but I’d been to a shopping mall with Hannah, and we’d ridden the elevators there.
Back then it had seemed very exciting and “worldly.” Now I felt like I was living in a whole different world. Nothing seemed real to me, as if this was all a continuation of a nightmare.
Hannah and Aaron were dead. Reece must have died too, and I... I wasn’t sure what I was now—maybe somewhere in between alive and dead?
Maybe seeing Josiah would help. He’d been through the same horrific experience I had. He would understand how I felt.
Now that I thought about it, maybe he would be able to relate in every way to what I was going through. He and I were the only two to “survive” the accident. Maybe he’d been bitten last night as well.
Something leapt in my chest. Was it wrong that I was almost hoping he had been? I didn’t want him to be shunned by his family and community, but if he had become a vampire as well, I wouldn’t be alone.
We could figure out our next steps and learn how to navigate this new life—if you could call it life—together.
That hope was dashed as soon as I spotted him.
Once again, my unusually acute new sense of smell detected his signature scent. He was in the first ICU room on my right as I approached the nurses’ station.
The large window gave me a clear view of his bed. While my injuries, including the bite on my hand, had healed overnight, Josiah was in rough shape. In fact, if I hadn’t picked up on his scent, I might not have believed it was him.
Both his eyes were swollen shut, the lids grossly misshapen and stained with red and purple. The rest of him didn’t look much better.
There were huge scrapes on his forehead and chin, I guessed from the asphalt, and matching ones on his right forearm and knuckles. The left arm was entirely covered by a cast, as was his left leg.
My vision blurred, and I turned away from the window taking deep breaths and pressing a fist against my midsection which felt tied up in knots.
I approached the nurses’ station in slow motion. “Hello. I’m a friend of Josiah Yoder’s. Can I… see him?”
The nurse’s answering expression wasn’t encouraging. “There’s a limit on how many people can visit at a time in the ICU. I’m pretty sure his parents are in there with him now.”
As I’d just passed his room and didn’t see Mr. and Mrs. Yoder, I was sure they weren’t.
“Could you just check for me? Please? I was in the accident with him, and I really need to see him.” True. “I’m his girlfriend,” I added for some extra persuasion.
Not so true. But I was desperate.
She hesitated, but something in my eyes must have convinced her because she scooted her chair back and got up.
“I’ll go take a peek.”
Going to that first room, she slid the door open, popped her head in, withdrew it, and came back to me.
“They must have gone down to the cafeteria. I’ll give you five minutes, okay? I should warn you—he’s in bad shape. I’m sorry to say it, but he’s not expected to make it through the night.”
“Oh.” My heart sank. Not Josiah, too.
The survivor’s guilt hit me like a heavy bag of grain. It wasn’t right that I should have survived the accident when all my friends died.
But had I really survived? I wasn’t sure how much my life was worth when I’d lost my connection to my family, my community and entire way of living.
Preparing myself to say goodbye to the boy I’d known since I was two, I stepped into the dimly lit room.
The white walls and crisp white bedcoverings were a terrifying contrast to the kaleidoscope of colors covering Josiah’s arms, neck, and face. The soft whirs and beeps of medical equipment were the only sounds in the room.
A respirator pumped air in and out of my friend’s lungs at a slow and steady pace, doing the work his body couldn’t do for him any longer.
Drawing close to the bed, I touched his hand lightly. “Josiah. It’s me, Abigail. I came to visit you.”
There was no response. Not even a flicker of an eyelid.
He couldn’t hear me, didn’t know I was there. The nurse hadn’t said whether he was brain dead, but something told me Josiah was gone.
I couldn’t stand it—I couldn’t let this happen. Unlike my parents, who’d had six children and might still have one or two more, Josiah’s parents had only him. No one was sure why.
It just wasn’t fair. If only I could go back to last night and switch places with him on the buggy’s front bench. I would have suffered the fatal injury instead of him.
But then, from what I could remember, my neck had been broken. It was possible I would have died on the scene if the woman hadn’t come along. I was only alive because she’d found me... and had bitten me.
I looked down at Josiah’s battered hand, so limp and lifeless in mine. What if...
One tooth on each side of my upper jaw moved.
It felt like a simultaneous tug, but the teeth didn’t fall out. Instead they lengthened until they protruded past the other teeth and parted my lips.
The nausea I’d felt earlier was replaced by a sudden, ferocious thirst.
No. You can’t.
But the mental image returned, more insistent this time. Me, lifting that hand to my mouth. Josiah opening his eyes, getting out of bed, walking, talking.
Living.
He’ll be an outcast. Like you. He’ll hate you.
But maybe he wouldn’t.
Maybe his parents wouldn’t shun their only child. Maybe they’d be so grateful to have him still with them they’d overlook his change in eye color and... diet. Maybe he’d be happy to go on existing and taking care of them.
And I wouldn’t be alone.
“You’ll never know unless you try it,” had been one of Hannah’s favorite sayings. There was no doubt in my mind if she had the chance to live again, even as a vampire, she’d take it in a heartbeat.
If only I had more time to decide. If only I actually knew some other vampires—or at least one—so I could ask if they had any regrets about turning.
From what I’d heard, some of the English actually chose to turn so they could have immortal life and greater physical power.
You can do it together. Even if he’s banished, you’ll get through it together. He wanted to marry you already.
I pushed from my mind that little voice that said I’d never wanted to marry him.
I wasn’t even sure if biting him would work. I’d only turned last night, and I didn’t really feel any different except for my sensitivity to sunlight.
Maybe I was too weak to create another vampire. Maybe there was more to it than just biting a person.
And who even knew what the turning process would be like? I couldn’t remember anything about my own.
On the other hand, side-effects were hardly a concern at this point. Josiah was certainly going to die if I didn’t at least try it.
Behind me the glass door slid open with a swish.
Oh no. My time was up. I’d missed my chance.
“One more minute,” the nurse said.
Keeping my face turned away from her, I nodded my understanding, and she left the room again.
I stroked Josiah’s hand, examining his still face.
“What should I do?” I whispered. “I wish I knew whether you’d want this or not.”
At that moment, his finger twitched, making me jump. Maybe it was just an involuntary movement, but I took it as a sign.
Keeping my back turned to the window, I lifted Josiah’s hand to my lips, opened my mouth, and closed my teeth on his skin.
At first, I thought I hadn’t bitten hard enough, but then the taste of blood filled my mouth.
It was different from those times long ago when I’d lost a tooth or brushed too hard and caused gum bleeding. Josiah’s blood tasted... amazing. Better than Mamm’s blueberry cobbler with fresh cream, better than hot, buttered kettle corn.
I wasn’t sure it was necessary for the transformation process to begin, but I drew more of the blood into my mouth.
As it moved past my taste buds to my throat and then my stomach, my head started to swim. My hands, which held Josiah’s hand, shook—not with weakness but with energy.
In fact, my entire body felt energized in a way I’d never before experienced, each limb coming alive and making me feel like I could punch through one of these walls if I wanted to, like I could run the ten miles to my family’s farm without breaking a sweat.
I never wanted to stop feeling this way, and I never wanted to stop drinking. Nothing I had ever done or could ever do would be able to match the pleasure of this moment.
Somewhere in the back of my brain was the dim realization that if I didn’t stop, all of Josiah’s blood would be gone, and that couldn’t be a good thing.
But the larger part of my mind was sparking and whirling with other thoughts and sensations.
The door behind me slid open again, and the nurse stepped into the room. Don’t ask me how I knew she’d walked in because her shoes made no noise, but I knew she was there. I pulled Josiah’s bleeding hand close to my body, hunching over it to hide the evidence.
One of the millions of thoughts racing through my brain was that now that she’d caught me, I might have to kill her too.
That caused a whole new level of exhilaration while at the same time horrified me that I could even think such a thing.
But the woman didn’t scream or demand I stop or even accuse me of anything. She placed a comforting hand on my shoulder and spoke in a tone filled with compassion.
“It’s time. I’m so sorry.”
Oh. She thought the tremors of my body and my hunched posture meant I was crying.
I nodded rapidly then swiped my tongue over Josiah’s hand once more before placing it on the bed and tucking the sheets up over it.
He still hadn’t moved, hadn’t made a sound or given any indication he’d felt what I was doing.
It didn’t work. I’m not strong enough. Either that or I’d taken too much blood and killed him.
Without lifting my head to look at the nurse, I whispered, “Thank you,” then stood and rushed from the room before my thoughts about her and the sound of her strong, steady heartbeat got the better of me.
Hurrying down the hall toward the elevator, I spotted the Yoders coming toward me.
Oh no. As I’d grown up next door to them and had known them all my life, they were like second parents to me. But I couldn’t face them right now.
And I definitely didn’t want to be there when they walked into their son’s room and found him dead.
“Abigail?” Mrs. Yoder said. “What are you doing here, dear? Did you come to see our Josiah?”
Her gray-faced expression of grief matched that of her husband. They both looked like they’d aged twenty years since I’d seen them a few days ago.
I ducked my head and rushed past them. “I’m so sorry.”
And then I opened the door to the emergency stairwell and ran down the five flights of stairs into the hospital lobby and out into the dark parking lot.
Where someone was waiting for me.
6
Something More
It was one of the strangers from the crash site, the large man with the long, blond hair.
He wore all black—leather pants, leather boots, and a military style vest with lots of buckles.
When I’d first seen him last night, I’d thought he looked like an angel. Now I knew what he really was—a vampire.
“Hello Abigail,” he said in a friendly tone. “Do you remember me?”
I nodded rapidly, easing toward the ER department’s sliding doors though I had no interest in going back in there. If Josiah died, I couldn’t face his parents.
If he didn’t... I wasn’t prepared to answer the questions that would surely follow.
“You were there after the crash. With the woman... who bit me,” I said.
The guy nodded, still smiling. He was younger than I’d realized last night, in his early twenties or even younger.
“That’s right. That was Imogen. I’m Kannon. There’s no need to be afraid. I’m not going to hurt you—though I probably don’t need to tell you that. You must have figured out by now you’re a whole lot harder to hurt than you used to be.”
I stopped backing away. “Am I really a... vampire now?”
It felt strange to say the word, but what my father had said must have been right. After all, I’d just bitten (and consumed the blood of) one of my oldest friends.
And liked it.
“You are,” Kannon confirmed.
I shuddered, backing away once again. “No. This isn’t right. I can’t be a vampire.”
He chuckled. “Why not?”
“It’ll ruin my life.”
The chuckle turned into a laugh. “How do you know this isn’t the life you were meant for? Haven’t you ever wished for something more... something bigger than you’ve ever seen or imagined?”
I didn’t answer him, suddenly wondering if vampires could read minds.
“My car is this way,” he said. “We should get going.”
“Where?”
“I’m here to bring you home.” His tone suggested it should have been obvious.
“Home?”
An image of my family’s farmhouse popped into my mind. I’d already been home, though apparently I couldn’t use the term to apply to the farm or my commun
ity any longer.
“Yes. To our stronghold. It’s in Virginia. We could travel on foot and make it there before daybreak, but I brought a car just in case you’re not in your full strength yet. You didn’t get burned, did you?” the guy asked.
“No. I mean, I don’t think so.”
“Good. I felt pretty fortunate to find that culvert for you. It was the best shelter I could locate on short notice. We hated to leave you behind, but the human authorities were coming up on us quickly, and we were traveling in a large group. The Accord forbids us to gather or travel in groups of more than ten,” he explained. “When I went back tonight to look for you and found it vacant, I got worried that maybe you’d, you know, stepped right out into the sun or something. Avoid that, by the way.”
“Yes, I figured out that part on my own.”
“Well, you won’t have to be alone for the rest of it. Imogen is eager to get you home to the Bastion and begin your training.”
“What? What training? I’m not leaving—not until after Josiah’s funeral. And then... I’m not sure where I’ll go.”
I was determined to pay my final respects to Josiah, even if I had to do it from a distance. Hannah and Aaron’s services would probably be tomorrow as well.
Though I hadn’t been driving either vehicle, I felt responsible for what had happened to my friends.
Maybe it was the survivor’s guilt talking, but I was plagued by the thought that if I’d only taken that ride with Reece, if I’d been more courageous, been willing to step outside my comfort zone and have an adventure, none of this would have happened.
Maybe his car would have been somewhere else at that time—with me and him in it—and my friends would have traveled safely back to the village.
They’d all be alive tonight.
I’d still be human.
Kannon looked surprised at my declaration. “You must come with me to the Bastion. Imogen will have my head if I return without you.”
I didn’t like the sound of that. “What does that mean? Who is she? Why does she even care?”
“She’s our leader. I’m a lieutenant with the Bloodbound, and she sent me to retrieve you. It’s not my place to ask why. All I know is if I don’t carry out her order, it’s not going to go well for me. It’ll be all right, I promise. I was scared at first too, but there’s no reason to be. I remember thinking my life was over when I was turned, but it’s just the opposite, Abigail. There’s so much you don’t understand, so much you need to learn. That’s why you should be with your people.”
