by Lauren Runow
I totally envision her throwing her hands in the air in frustration but with her face covered in a shit-eating grin as, I’m sure, she winks at the guy, showing she’s only kidding. That’s so classic Kylie.
“Can you please verify to these people that you do know me and you want me to come up there?”
I laugh at her antics. “We’re in room 310.”
“See, she wants me there, and I just got her room number, so I don’t need you anymore.”
“Ma’am, I’m sorry. It’s our—”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah, policy,” I hear her say back.
I can only imagine her saying it, walking away, waving her hand in the air like she’s dismissing the employee.
“Okay,” she says into the phone, “you still have to act surprised, but I’ll be right there.”
“Will do.” I hang up and smile at Tucker.
“Who was that?”
“My best friend, Kylie, is on her way up!”.
“Cool,” Tucker says, sitting up. He takes his time in placing his hands on his knees before standing up.
I want to ask him what’s going on, but Kylie knocks on the door, so I rush to it.
Opening up the door, I’m smiling from ear to ear as she holds her arms out to her sides.
“Surprise!”
“Oh my God, I had no idea you were coming here!” I joke as we rush to embrace each other.
“I’ve missed you.” She hugs me tighter.
“Me too. Come in.” I open the door wide, dying to introduce her to Tucker. “Kylie, this is Tucker.”
He stands, and man, he looks sexier than ever in his jeans that hug him in the right places and a plain, simple white T-shirt. He has his American flag hat on, and I smile at my country boy.
“Now, I get why you’ve stayed in Mason Creek much longer than we all thought,” Kylie says, looking back and forth between him and me.
Tucker chuckles as he reaches out his hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Kylie.”
“Nice to meet you too. Thank you for taking such good care of our girl here. Lord knows, she needed a down-home country boy like you. I mean, a country man like you.”
“Come on,” I say as I wrap my arms around Tucker’s waist. “Don’t tease him about being older than me. That’s my job.” I lean up to kiss his cheek.
“Oh, I’m not teasing. I can see every inch of why you’re into him.” She eyes him up and down, and I swear I see Tucker blush. “I’m just kidding.” She laughs. “So, what are you guys up to tonight? Let’s go have dinner together and then go to one of our favorite spots for drinks.”
I turn to Tucker. “Are you down with that?”
“I’m always down.” Tucker winks at me, and I shake my head with a chuckle.
“Come on. I’ll show you my old stomping grounds.”
We head out together to one of my favorite bars that has high-top tables to order some of the best bar food I’ve ever had. The place is crawling with the after-work crowd of men dressed in dress shirts with their sleeves rolled up and women in their best business suits.
Tucker doesn’t give anyone a second glance as he enters, appearing to feel just as secure with himself and his attire, as if we were walking into Wren’s Café or Pony Up.
We grab a table in the corner, and after we order drinks and food, Kylie sits back in her chair, checking me out.
“What?” I ask with a nervous laugh.
“You look good. I think Mason Creek has done you well.”
I reach over and place my hand on Tucker’s leg. “I think Tucker has done me well.”
He lets out a sharp laugh, and Kylie joins in.
I close my eyes. “That didn’t come out right.”
“It came out perfectly, in my opinion.” Tucker grins as he grips my hand.
“So, how about here? How’s New York been without me?” I ask, trying to take the attention off my slip up.
“Same ole big city. I’ve been working like crazy and it’s kicking my ass.”
I glance to Tucker. I don’t miss those days at all. I never realized how much life I was missing by constantly being on the go. I thought I had to be at every party, every bar, and involved in everything I could do. Working remotely has proven that I didn’t need to be.
Our food arrives, and we spend our time eating and talking about New York, how Kylie and I met, and what our lives are like, living here. It feels like a lifetime away, yet it’s only been a few months.
As we finish our meals, I notice a group of our friends enter the bar.
“You didn’t?” I turn to Kylie, knowing she had to have planned this.
“Girl, you know we couldn’t let you come back to town without a night out together,” Kylie says with a huge grin on her face as she waves them over.
They head our way, and I hop off my chair and run toward them, giving them all hugs.
“I’m so glad to see you guys. I want you to meet my boyfriend, Tucker. Tucker, this is Christy, Eric, Hunter, and Sonia.”
Tucker stands, and they all say their hellos. Christy and Sonia eye me and then him, showing me they approve.
I giggle as I lean over and kiss him on the cheek, whispering in his ear, “All my girls seem to think you’re sexy as hell.”
“Only thing that matters is what you think,” he responds with a wink.
I kiss him and then search for the waitress to get everyone a round of drinks.
“Justine, even though I want nothing more than for you to move back to New York to be with us,” Sonia says, “seeing now what’s been keeping you in Mason Creek, I totally understand.”
I turn to Tucker, who’s got a sly grin on his face from her comment.
“So, I’ll let you know about a job opportunity that I think would be perfect for you. I mean, if the magazine makes you come back and you want to stay in Mason Creek,” she says more to Kylie than me since we work together and she knows that would be keeping us apart. “It’s for a blog that is getting all kinds of traction, and they’re looking for new writers. You could live there and do basically the same stuff you do now.”
I turn to Tucker with a hopeful expression. “That could be a possibility.”
“Yeah, but you said being editor in chief is your end goal. I’d hate for you to give up on that,” he responds.
“Maybe my end goal has changed.” I grin, and my girls swoon. I lean over to kiss him, and even though he kisses me back, it’s not with the same intensity I’m used to.
An hour later, I’m laughing so hard that my cheeks hurt. I’ve missed my friends more than I thought. I’ve had fun in Mason Creek, but these people aren’t about the past. They’re about the now. We’ve all shared our ups and downs as adults. Not kid stuff of getting caught drinking or sneaking out. I’ve lived through breakups, babies being born, and job changes with them. Until a month ago, they were my family here in the city, and I just left them, thinking I had nowhere to go.
I turn to Tucker and realize that if I hadn’t left, then I never would have met him.
I run my fingers through his hair and tilt my head with a grin. He’s been pretty quiet, talking when spoken to but not as outgoing as I’ve seen him be when hanging at the bar in Mason Creek.
When I turn in his direction more, I see he looks a little off.
I lean in and whisper, “You feeling okay?”
He nods. “Yeah. Just tired. I was thinking about heading out.”
“Okay, no problem. I’ll get our bill and—”
“No, you stay. I know you’ve missed your friends.”
“I don’t mind heading back. We can curl up and watch a movie together.”
“Nah, I’m just going to crash as soon as I get back. I’ve been watching you. I’ve never seen you so happy to be around friends. These are your people. Spend as much time as you want with them. I’ve gotten you the last month. Don’t worry about me.”
“Are you sure?”
“It’s all good. Just call me when you’re ready to leave,
and I’ll come walk you back to the hotel.”
I lean in to kiss him. “Thank you for being so amazing.”
He kisses me back. “Have fun.”
He stands and says his good-byes and all the pleasantries that come with that. Instantly, Christy, Sonia, and Kylie lean toward me, wanting to talk about Tucker and learn all the ins and outs of our relationship.
I love telling them how truly happy he’s made me and how he’s a pretty big deal around most of Montana. I feel like I’m bragging about him, but I’m just so damn proud to be his girlfriend.
A few hours later, I notice my phone light up with Tucker’s handsome face. I turn around in my seat and plug one ear, so I can hear him better since the place has definitely gotten louder, the later the night has flown by.
“Hey, baby. We’re still here. Are you wanting to head to bed?”
“Justine …” he says, and my stomach drops at the sound of his voice.
“What’s wrong?” I stand up, grabbing my purse, ready to leave the bar.
“I don’t know, but I’ve been really sick.”
“I’m on my way.”
“I … I don’t want you to leave your friends, but—”
“Tucker, don’t worry about it. I’ll be right there.” I hang up and turn to my friends. “I’m so sorry, you guys, but I have to get going.”
“Is everything okay?” Kylie places her hand over mine, concerned.
I don’t know how to respond. I don’t want them all to know what’s going on with him, so I put on a fake smile. “It’s fine. Tucker thinks he might have eaten something bad earlier.”
“Oh no, that’s the worst. Go take care of your man,” she says.
I give everyone a hug and thank them for coming to hang out with me before I head out. On my way back to the hotel, I grab some ginger ale, crackers, and Tylenol.
Tucker got an injection for MS before we came to New York, and they said one of the side effects was flu-like symptoms, so I can only imagine that’s what’s really going on.
When I enter our hotel room, I see Tucker curled up on our bed, shaking.
“Oh, baby.” I run to him.
He’s flush and pale.
“Here, let me get you a washcloth.”
“No.” He grabs me. “Please, just stay here with me. I just want …” He doesn’t finish his sentence.
I know the fact that he had to call me was something he didn’t want to do. He’s never had to ask for help, but he needs to know I’m here to help him.
I slide off my shoes and curl into bed with him, resting his head on my lap and rubbing his hair.
We sit in silence as we watch a movie that he had on. Within minutes, he falls asleep with his arms wrapped around my waist.
I run my fingers through his hair, wishing I could do more for him. Seeing him so helpless hurts me to my soul. He’s such a proud man, and I know it kills him to be so vulnerable.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Tucker
I wake up, still wearing my clothes and drenched in sweat. Justine is sleeping, sitting up, and I find my arms wrapped around her legs. Remembering having to call her to leave her friends to come take care of me fills me with anger. I’m only here to protect her, not for her to have to take care of me.
I don’t ever want to be a burden on anyone in my life, especially her.
The helplessness I felt last night washes over me. I’ve never been so scared as to what was going on in my body. I’ve been sick, but that hit me so strong that I didn’t know what to do if I got worse and couldn’t help myself if need be.
When she came back to the hotel, a level of calmness wrapped around me, and I could finally relax and fall asleep.
Now, I feel nothing but guilt.
She was having an amazing time with her friends, who she hadn’t seen in a while, and I ruined it for her.
That’s not okay.
She should be here, going out and enjoying the end of her twenties. Not at home, having to take care of me.
I sit up, and she squirms.
“Are you okay?” she asks in a panic, which hits me even harder.
She shouldn’t be this worried about me. No one should.
“I’m fine. I’m just going to go to the bathroom and get a drink of water.”
“I’ll get it.” She hops up, but I stop her.
“It’s okay. Here, lie down. You probably didn’t get any sleep, sleeping like that.”
She grins as she slides down in the bed and lies on a pillow. Her eyes close instantly, and I can see the relief she feels in finally being able to lie down.
I hop in the shower, letting the hot water wash over me, sending chills all over my body.
I hate how helpless I was last night. I’m supposed to be strong, be her protector in a time of need. She can’t count on me if I’m curled up in a ball, feeling like I’m dying.
And what about fifteen years from now? I’ll be almost sixty while she’ll be in her forties. That’s a huge difference in how we’ll be living our lives. I’ll be slowing down while she’ll have the energy I do today.
I can’t imagine not being able to do the things I love to do now. Will I be able to cast a line on my fishing pole? My two boats take a lot of maintenance and upkeep. Will I be able to do that? Having your balance is key on any watercraft, yet that seems to be the biggest problem with MS.
What if she gets bored with having someone who can’t go do the fun things life has to offer because they have a disease that’s taken over their body? That’s not fair to her. I’ve already had one wife leave me because I was too boring in her eyes. I can’t go through that again.
What would be worse is, I’d fully agree with her.
Besides, there was a reason she never came back to Mason Creek. I saw the difference in her last night. This is her home. Knowing that she wants to give up her dream for me doesn’t sit right with me. I don’t want her to maybe regret that decision down the road.
The more I think about it, the more I know what I need to do.
When I get out of the shower, I grab my phone from the dresser and head back into the bathroom, calling the airline and changing my flight back home to leave today. Justine doesn’t need me here, holding her down, while she’s trying to work or hang out with her friends.
I try to pack my bags as quietly as possible, knowing she needs sleep after the night I put her through.
When she wakes up, she smiles sheepishly at me. “Are you feeling better?”
I walk over to the bed and sit beside her. “Yeah. Thank you for taking care of me last night.”
She grabs my hand and holds it in hers. “You never have to thank me. I’m just glad to see you’re feeling better.” She closes her eyes, keeping my hand pressed against her.
“I’m heading home. I called and changed my flight.”
Her eyes pop open. “You’re what?” She sits up, looking around and seeing my bag packed. “Why? Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, everything’s fine. I just think it’s better if I go home. I know you have a lot of work to do, and I don’t want you having to take care of me.”
“But, Tucker, it’s fine. You don’t need to leave.”
“Yeah, I do. I don’t want to be a burden.”
“But who’s going to take care of you if you have another sickness hit you like that?”
I inhale, hating that she’s so worried about me. “It’s okay. I’m a big boy. I can take care of myself. I promise.”
I run my finger down her face, and she stops my movement, holding my hand against her cheek.
“I don’t want you to go.”
“I’ll be just fine. It’s only five in the morning. Go back to sleep for a little while, so you can face the day ahead more refreshed.”
She grins, but I know it’s not real. Her expression just makes my decision easier to realize. She has a big life in front of her in this city she calls home. She doesn’t need to be taking care of a guy almost twice her age.
I lean down and kiss her lips. “Thank you for everything. I love you.”
“I love you too,” she says, barely above a whisper wrapping her arms around me and holding me there for a moment longer.
What should be a monumental moment between us feels like a stab to the heart. I wish I weren’t facing this horrible disease, but I am, and I don’t want to ruin anyone else’s life in the meantime.
Justine
I hated seeing Tucker walk out the door, but I know for him, it was a pride thing. If he needs his space, I’m willing to give it. What he’s going through has to be a lot, and I have to respect his wishes.
I tried to go back to sleep, but it was pointless with my nerves from him leaving twisting and turning my insides even though I’d only gotten a few hours of actual sleep last night.
Finally giving up, I slide out of bed, feeling every inch of awkwardness in how I slept last night throughout my body but it was worth it. Knowing how sick he was and how much he needed me broke my heart, and one night of bad sleep is nothing compared to what he’s dealing with.
When I get to the bathroom, I see a note on the counter.
Justine,
I’m sorry I made you come back to take care of me last night. You deserve so much more than having to take care of a sick person. Don’t worry about me. I’ve taken care of myself for the last few years, and I’ll be just fine.
I know you have a lot of work to do, so stay here. There’s no reason for you to come back to Mason Creek just for me. This is your home, and that was obvious last night.
I’ve loved our time together, and I will cherish it forever.
All my love,
Tucker
Tears fill my eyes as I drop the letter to the counter. I know he’s going through a lot, but this is absolutely not what I even considered would happen. I race to grab my phone to call him, but it instantly goes to voice mail. When I glance at the clock, I realize he’s probably still on the plane.
As tears flow freely down my face, I curl up in my bed and let them fall.
