by Mary Monroe
“What?”
“Lo’retta, I don’t want you to abort your baby,” Maureen stated. “Please don’t do that.”
CHAPTER 61
WHAT MAUREEN HAD JUST SAID STARTLED HER AS MUCH AS IT DID Loretta. She never thought that she would be saying such a thing to the woman who had stolen her husband. But Maureen still wanted what was best for her child, and now she wanted what was best for her grandchild.
“What’s wrong with you, Mama? I do not want to raise this baby!”
“You won’t have to, Lo’retta.”
“You want me to have it and give it up for adoption?”
“Well, yeah. Somethin’ like that.”
“You want me to miss out on a ton of jobs, go through all that mornin’ sickness and God knows what else, and lose my shape? I already told you I’ve gained a bunch of weight and can’t work again until after I have the abortion—and lose this weight.”
“If you take care of yourself, you won’t have to worry about gettin’ sick every mornin’ and losin’ your shape. At your age, you’ll lose the weight,” Maureen insisted. “Please have the baby. This is probably the only thing that I will ever ask you to do for me again. Let somebody who wants a baby raise yours.”
Loretta cackled like a witch before responding to Maureen’s suggestion. “Well, if you thinkin’ about takin’ the baby and raisin’ it yourself, no way! If I do decide to have it, I want it to be raised by somebody I don’t know so I wouldn’t have to worry about ever seein’ him or her again.”
“I see. Well, it’s your life and your body—”
“And my baby,” Loretta interrupted. “What happens to it is up to me, not you. I’ll never let you raise a baby of mine. I don’t want to come back to Florida and have a baby runnin’ around callin’ me ‘Mama’ any time soon. I don’t want a child who would probably grow up hatin’ me for givin’ it up, to even know who I am.” Loretta stopped talking long enough to catch her breath. “Shoot! They show enough movies on the Lifetime TV channel about adopted babies growin’ up and trackin’ down their real mother and turnin’ her life upside down. I’m not about to let somethin’ like that happen to me. My career would end up in the toilet so fast it would make your head spin. I don’t need that kind of disruption in my life right now.”
“I’m sorry you feel that way. I don’t want to raise your baby, but I know somebody else that wants to raise it,” Maureen said evenly. She was amazed at how well she was able to suppress her anger.
“Wait a minute. Don’t tell me you’ve told everybody I’m pregnant!” Lo’retta shrieked.
“Only your uncle Virgil and your aunt Big Mo’reen.”
“Don’t tell anybody else. Not Jay or any of your friends. They don’t need to know. They’d talk about me like a dog.”
Maureen didn’t want Jay, Catty, or Fast Black to know about Loretta’s pregnancy. Jay would probably stay in a neutral position and keep most of his thoughts about it to himself. But Catty and Fast Black would have a field day. If Big Maureen ended up with the baby, nobody in Florida would ever have to know. Maybe years later, Maureen would feel comfortable enough to at least tell Jay and maybe even everybody else. For now, only she, Virgil, and Big Maureen needed to know. “I agree with you. They don’t need to know. But like I said, I know somebody who would love to adopt the baby.”
“Like who? And don’t you even think about Uncle Virgil and Aunt Corrine raisin’ my child! If I give it to them, I may as well give it to you.”
“No, not them. One of my patients at the home has a niece who has been tryin’ to have a baby for years and years. If you let her adopt your baby, it would be an answer to a prayer for her. The woman has been married to the same real nice man for fifteen years.” Maureen couldn’t believe how easily she had come up with such a bold-faced lie.
“Oh yeah? Hmmm. Well, where do this niece and her real nice husband live?”
“Huh? Oh! Uh . . . they live in Canada and they travel a lot. You would never have to worry about seein’ the baby once you turn it over to them.”
“Canada? A white couple?”
“Uh-uh. A black couple originally from the Dominican that moved to Canada a long time ago.”
Loretta’s silence gave Maureen hope, so she continued spinning her tale. “They got beaucoup money. He’s a doctor. They live in a real big house with a huge backyard and everything. The baby would have a real good life. Better than even you or I could give it.”
“What if later on down the road I wanted to take my baby back?”
“It would be real hard, probably impossible, for you to do once you sign the papers.” Papers! That was another thing. But Maureen knew that between her, Virgil, and Big Maureen, they could dummy up some legal-looking papers for Loretta to sign. “You could come home to have the baby. That way me and Virgil can take care of you. Uh, the couple said they don’t want to meet the baby’s mother or even know her name or anything else about her. Not now, not ever . . .”
“Don’t these people wonder why you don’t want to raise your own grandchild? Or are they just that desperate for a baby that they don’t care?”
Maureen had never been much of a liar, but she was impressed at how easily she was able to make up material as she went along. “Uh, they don’t know that I’m the baby’s grandmother. I thought it would be better to keep that information from them.”
“I don’t know. I don’t want to come back to Florida and have everybody talkin’ about me. I could just hear all the trash talkin’ Catty and Fast Black would be doin’ about me! Livin’ under the same roof with you would be too uncomfortable for me, and it probably wouldn’t be safe for me.”
“Not safe for you? You wouldn’t feel safe livin’ with me? Lo’retta, I don’t care what you do—I would never hurt you. I can understand you not wantin’ to live with me again. It would probably be just as uncomfortable for me as it would be for you. I’ll find you a real cheap motel to stay in until you have the baby. Maybe one in Tampa or Lauderdale so you won’t have to worry about runnin’ into anybody you know. Me and Virgil will visit you every day. I just don’t want you to be alone in a strange city goin’ through a pregnancy by yourself. You know now that you can’t count on Mel.”
“I already told you that I made a lot of new friends. My new boyfriend, Kyle, is in the process of movin’ in with me. He already told me that he would find a full-time housekeeper to help me out.”
Maureen let out a weary groan. Her broken heart was pounding like it was trying to get out of her body, one piece at a time. “A housekeeper? You mean you might decide to keep the baby?”
“Oh no! I’m not goin’ to keep this baby. Why in the world would I want to do somethin’ like that at a time like this, Mama? But because that other girl died durin’ her abortion, Kyle even thinks I should have it and give it to some childless couple. He said he would find me a nurse so she could look after me until I have this baby, if I do—which I probably won’t.”
Maureen let out another weary groan. “Whatever you decide to do, I hope you make the right choice. I would hate for you to do anything you will end up regrettin’.”
“Oh! I just remembered somethin’. I don’t mean to rush you off the phone, Mama, but I have to go see my doctor so he can tell me why I’ve gained so much weight so fast. I can’t stand to go around lookin’ like I swallowed a watermelon. Gotta run!” Loretta hung up.
Even though all Maureen could hear now was a dial tone, she said, “Bye, Lo’retta.”
As soon as Maureen placed the telephone back into its cradle, it rang. She was afraid that it might be Big Maureen and since she didn’t have positive news for her, she didn’t answer.
One thing Maureen didn’t like to do was deliver bad news. When she didn’t have a choice, she put it off for as long as she could. As soon as the answering machine beeped for the caller to leave a message and she heard Jay’s voice, she let out a massive sigh of relief. She clicked off the answering machine and took his call. “I’m
here and I’m so glad it’s you!” she wailed, clutching the telephone like it was the Holy Grail.
“I’m glad it’s me too,” Jay laughed. “How about some seafood? I just discovered this cozy little place near the beach. It’s real popular with the A-list crowd. I know how you like to gawk at celebrities, and this place is a major hangout for some of your favorites.”
“That sounds nice. You called just in time,” Maureen replied.
“Just in time for what?”
“I need to talk to somebody about somethin’.”
Jay hesitated with his response. “Oh shit,” he groaned. “Not more unpleasant news, I hope.”
Maureen began to speak slowly, spitting the words out like they had been dipped in poison. “Well, yes, it is unpleasant news,” she said. Maureen had suddenly thought that she wanted to talk to Jay about Loretta’s situation, but she caught herself in time. He probably still didn’t need to know about this yet. She went in a completely unrelated direction. “Uh, I lost two patients today, both within the same hour. They were both real nice and nonviolent, so I am really goin’ to miss them.” Two of the patients that she cared for at the home had died earlier in the day.
“That is unpleasant news,” Jay told Maureen.
“Mr. Brown and Mr. Plummer,” she added. “I’ve been feelin’ kind of down in the dumps about it.”
“Uh-huh. I guess that’s something you don’t get used to,” Jay said. “Baby, those people are on their last leg when they check into that home. But you already know that, so why do you seem so surprised and upset? Didn’t you lose another one of your patients just last week?”
“Yes. Old Lady Graham passed while I was givin’ her a sponge bath,” Maureen recalled. “Let’s stop talkin’ about that before I get even more depressed. Now hurry up and come get me so we can get to that seafood place.”
CHAPTER 62
JAY DROVE MAUREEN HOME A COUPLE OF HOURS LATER. THE first THING she did when she got inside was check her answering machine for messages. She was pleased to see that she didn’t have any.
Jay didn’t stay long and when he left, Maureen went from room to room looking for things to do to keep herself busy. She cleaned out and reorganized her kitchen cabinets, she did two loads of laundry, and she rearranged the living room furniture. Every time she walked past Loretta’s room, her heart skipped a beat. She knew that she would have to enter the room again sooner or later, if for no other reason than to open the windows to let in some fresh air. Eventually, she would have to decide what she was going to do about the room, either use it to store things or make it into a guest room. She even thought about moving to a new apartment so she wouldn’t have to deal with the room at all.
She finally crawled into bed around midnight, but she tossed and turned for two hours before she went to sleep.
The next day around 6:00 p.m., Big Maureen called, but Maureen let the answering machine take a message. She still wasn’t ready to talk to her big sister again. A few minutes later, without giving it much thought, Maureen dialed Loretta’s number.
A man answered and Maureen promptly hung up, thinking that it might be Mel. He was the last man in the universe she wanted to talk to. When she thought about it a little more, though, she realized that the voice had sounded too young to be Mel’s. She dialed the number again.
“Hello, is this the number for Lo’retta Montgomery?” she asked when the same voice answered.
“Who’s calling?”
“Uh, her mother.”
Maureen heard some shuffling around in the background and then the next voice she heard belonged to Loretta. “Yeah, Mama.”
“I just called to say hello.”
“Hello. Well, is that all you called for?” Loretta sounded impatient, so Maureen planned to make her call very brief.
“Lo’retta, I know you have company, so I won’t talk long, but I wish that you will reconsider . . .”
“Reconsider what?”
“Uh, you know . . .”
“I know what? Look, Mama, I don’t have time for games. If you called to talk to me about somethin’, please do it so I can go on about my business.”
“Lo’retta, you don’t have to be so surly. I am your mother, girl.”
“Mama, what did you call me for?”
“I wanted to talk to you about your problem.”
“Problem? What problem? I don’t have no problems right now. Except for . . . oh that. You mean that baby.”
“Yeah. I mean ‘that baby.’ I wanted to talk to you about what you told me you plan to do about your . . . condition.”
“I am not goin’ to reconsider that. Please don’t bring up this subject again,” Loretta snarled.
“I won’t, but I do wish that you would give it a little more thought, Lo’retta. Please think about that poor, desperate, childless couple in Canada.”
“Think about me waddlin’ around lookin’ like Humpty Dumpty—which I almost look like now. I’m thinkin’ about how long it would take me to lose the weight if I went through with this pregnancy. Now please stay out of my business!”
“You will always be my business—”
“Mama, please get off my back and let me live my life the way I want to. I’m eighteen now, so I don’t have to listen to anything you have to say anymore.”
“Lo’retta, what is the matter with you? I can’t stand it when you sass me! I’m still your mother. For that reason alone, you should have a little more respect for me. If I had even thought about sassin’ Mama Ruby the way you do me, she would have laid me out like a log—Hello? Loretta? Hello?” Loretta had hung up. Maureen cursed, gritted her teeth and slammed the telephone back into its cradle.
As if on cue, Jay called a few seconds later. That was probably the only thing that kept Maureen from ripping the telephone out of the wall.
“Hello, sweetheart. You were on my mind so I thought I’d call to see if you’d like some company,” Jay chirped.
“Yeah. I would like some company,” Maureen decided, sounding like a wounded kitten.
“Oh-oh. Which one of your patients died this time?” Jay asked, holding his breath.
“Nobody. I just had a telephone conversation with my daughter, Jay. She was so mean and nasty to me.”
“Again?”
“Again.”
“Why don’t you let her cool off for a day or two and then call her up and apologize.”
“Apologize? I don’t have anything to apologize to her for!” Maureen snarled.
“It doesn’t matter if you do or not, sweetheart.”
“Jay, HELLO? I’m the victim here,” Maureen said firmly.
“I know that, baby—”
“She is puttin’ me through hell, but I’m still tryin’ to have a relationship with her. She won’t even meet me halfway!” Maureen yelled.
“But you should apologize to her if you want to resume a decent relationship with her. The thing is, Maureen, Loretta needs you more than you need her. She’s too immature and self-centered to realize that. She’s not going to meet you halfway. She’s not even going to take one step in your direction.”
“So you think that I should grovel and kiss my own daughter’s behind just so we can be on good terms again?”
“Baby, that’s just the way it is. If you don’t, you might lose her forever.”
Maureen didn’t want to agree or argue with Jay, but she knew he was right.
The following evening, she dialed Loretta’s number again. Maureen was nervous and angry at the same time. She wasn’t sure what she was going to say to Loretta. She decided that it would be better if she could leave a message on her answering machine, so she hoped to get a recorded outgoing message. And she did.
The crisp and pleasant-sounding message recorded by an anonymous telephone operator informed Maureen that the telephone number she had just dialed had been changed to an unlisted number.
CHAPTER 63
MAUREEN LIKED TO RECALL SOME OF THE OFF-THE-WALL REMARKS, com
ments, and statements that Mama Ruby had made to her when she was growing up. One that still danced around in her head from time to time was, “Mo’reen, don’t kiss nobody’s ass. If anything, bite the hell out of it and if that don’t straighten ’em out, bite it again!” Maureen couldn’t remember one single ass that Mama Ruby had kissed, except hers.
Loretta still had not given Maureen her mailing address. Now that she had changed her telephone number and had it unlisted, Maureen had no way to get in touch with her. Even if she wanted to kiss her spoiled rotten daughter’s ass, how would she do that now?
What would Mama Ruby do? Maureen wondered. She didn’t have to wonder about that for long. She knew what Mama Ruby would do. Mama Ruby would do whatever it took to resolve this issue. Even though Maureen had exercised her right to be independent and in control of her own life in a totally different way than Loretta, Mama Ruby had come after her with both guns blasting so to speak. Not only had she pestered and stalked Maureen after she had moved into her own apartment, but Mama Ruby had also paid a visit to the lobster factory personnel office and told just enough lies about Maureen to get her fired.
But that didn’t make Maureen move back home. One night while she was asleep, Mama Ruby stormed her apartment and ripped a telephone book in two with her bare hands. She had chased away most of Maureen’s potential lovers and even broke into her apartment and vandalized some of her property. She had begged, pleaded, and then ordered Maureen to move back home. She had even threatened to kill herself if Maureen didn’t comply. Maureen was about to give in, but she waited too long. Mama Ruby carried out her most serious threat of all: she died.
Well, Maureen wasn’t about to die if Loretta wanted to be hardheaded and mean. As much as she loved her daughter, she was not going to make a sacrifice of that magnitude.
An hour after Maureen had attempted to call Loretta, she let out a loud breath and leaped out of her seat. She scurried across the floor like a mouse and down the hall to Loretta’s bedroom. She pushed open the door so fast and hard, the doorknob hit the wall, leaving a hole the size of a man’s fist.
