‘I’m sure you’ll have lots of stories to tell after this experience . . . and you never know . . . if you continue to keep it up, we thought you might need somewhere to offload!’ Dad joked.
‘And so we made you this.’ Madison smiled. ‘We all did.’
‘Even John Pincher with his bum on display?’ Poppy giggled cheekily.
‘Even John Pincher with his bum on display.’ Madison cracked up. ‘Well-ish, he ate a sausage roll next to me while I was cutting the wood once or twice,’ she laughed.
‘Come and see it then, D,’ Dad says, and I realized I was so overwhelmed I hadn’t even gotted up close to it.
But then I do. And I see the beautiful strong wood, the legs so sturdy and carefully varnished, not like any of the ugly desks at school. ‘We put both Poppy and your puzzle designs on the top.’ Dad points to the engravings. ‘And a few other pieces . . .’ He winks and I nearly cry to see little illustrations of all the wonderful beautiful special things that make me so happy. I look at Poppy and she nods, all cute and excited for me.
‘Your mum drew most of them,’ Dad says and looks at Mum who goes all shy.
‘And me did one,’ Hector butted in.
‘They are to fuel your imagination. Or just to have around and inspire.’
Carved into the wood are little etchings of Lamb-Beth and my family. Of Will. Of my old house and my writing book. Of bugs and pancakes and animals and zombies and planets and stars and flowers and dragons and burgers and sweets and chocolate and monsters . . . and even my Angrosaurus rex.
‘It’s the SICKEST thing ever.’ Will shakes his head in disbelief.
‘Isn’t it awesome?’ Madison grins. ‘Do you like it?’
‘It’s the most special thing in the world.’
‘You did it, Darcy. If you can be not dramatic for five weeks, I reckon you can pretty much do anything!’ Dad squeezes me tight and I hug him back. And Mum. And gingerbread-smelling Madison.
And I can only think to do one thing . . .
Cry my eyes out like the most dramatic sobby wobby corn on the cobby heart throbby baby that ever existed in the world. I cry harder than any actress in any film ever, and the more I seem to cry the more I seem to enjoy crying more. It’s just such a relief to get it all out. And I hug everybody in the room and stroke my new fantastic desk over and over and throw myself across it, all strewn out like a dramatic actress, and everybody laughs and Mum says, ‘Oh, she’s back.’ And that means me. That means my drama.
And I can’t wait to go upstairs and write . . .
And write.
And write.
And write . . .
Chapter Twenty-One
Darcy Burdock is daydreaming. She is dreaming of Mrs Hay learning that she VERY nearly . . . PRETTY much almost stuck to a challenge . . . and being very proud of her and handing her a rolled-up hedgehog to keep in her pocket.
She is dreaming about a beautiful world. Where people wear hot-dog suits to dinner, where lambs can talk, where you can win a prize for finding the biggest bogey, where Wednesday is a you must wear glitter all day day. Of music and sunshine. Of the smell of popcorn. Smiling faces. She is dreaming of the future. Of Poppy being a growed-up dancer, on stage, bowing to thousands of clapping people, fallen red roses by her feet, Mum and Dad crying their eyes out with pride, their hearts bursting out of their chests. She is dreaming of Hector directing horror films about zombie snakes – he has a chair with his own name on it. Will being a professional BMXer. Leila travelling the world being a karate kung-fu explorer. Donald Pincher, an actual real-life maybe friend of hers, is perhaps on a yacht of some kind, singing opera songs to the whales, and when he comes back from his travels they will go for ice cream. Timothy owns an elastic-band factory and is a ballet dancer. Madison makes desks for writing hippos. And John might wear some underpants?
It is beautiful in this place. In a world where nobody cares. Where everybody is happy.
And where is Darcy Burdock in the dream?
Oh, she is just here, in her writing room. Where she sits at a big grand desk covered in sparkly pens and rainbow colours, where sunshine is pouring in through the window. She can see the big green trees outside and people of the world walking by. She is just finishing her latest book, ANGROSAURUS REX, a book inspired about herself when she was young.
When she has finished this last cup of tea, she will read the book back over to herself in a small whispery voice. If she is happy, she will send it to her publishers. They will make it into books and put the books on shelves and people will read it.
People like you.
Did you manage to decode the letter left for the new people in Darcy’s old house?
Acknowledgements
Thank you to my agents Jodie Hodges, Emily Talbot, Jane Willis and Dan Usztan. And all the team at United.
Thank you to my editor, Natalie Doherty.
Thank you to my copy editor, Sue Cook.
Thank you to the Design team at Penguin Random House, especially Dom Clements.
Thank you to all the libraries, schools, bookshops and reading groups that have supported Darcy.
Thank you to my readers. I love you. You’re the best . . .
Thank you to my friends and family, especially my brother and sister for living this nonsense with me and to Fiona for putting up with it!
Hi Darcey (a different one with an E in her name)!
Hi Beth! Hi Tegan! Hi Natalie! Hi Louis! Hi Angelo!
Hi Georgie! Hi Lullah! Hi B! Hi Summer!
Hi Nathaniel! Hi Dolly! Hi Charlie! Hi Jack! Hi Genie! Hi Lois! Hi Eva! Hi Lola! Hi Lacey!
And lots of love to all the Angrosauruses in the world. They are a thriving and amazing species.
About the Author
Author and illustrator Laura Dockrill is a graduate of the BRIT School of Performing Arts and has appeared at many festival and literary events across the country, including the Edinburgh Fringe, Camp Bestival, Latitude and the Southbank Centre’s Imagine Festival. Named one of the top ten literary talents by The Times and one of the top twenty hot faces to watch by ELLE magazine, she has performed her work on all the BBC’s radio channels, including Gemma Cairney’s Radio 1 show, plus appearances on Huw Murray, Colin Murray and Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour. In 2013 Laura was the Booktrust Online Writer in Residence and was named as a Guardian Culture Professionals Network ‘Innovator, Visionary, Pioneer’. Laura has been a roving reporter for the Roald Dahl Funny Prize, and is on the advisory panel at the Ministry of Stories. The first Darcy Burdock book was shortlisted for the Waterstones Children’s Book Prize 2014. She lives in south London with her bearded husband.
The Darcy Burdock series is Laura’s first writing for children. After having her stage invaded by fifty rampaging kids during a reading of her work for adults at Camp Bestival, she decided she really enjoyed the experience and would very much like it to happen again. Laura would like to make it clear that any resemblance between herself-as-a-child and Darcy is entirely accurate.
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First published 2017
This ebook published 2017
Text and illustrations copyright © Laura Dockrill, 2017
Cover artwork by Laura Dockrill
The moral right of the author and illustrator has been asserted.
A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library
ISBN: 978-1-448-19529-9
All correspondence to:
RHCP Digital
Penguin Random House Children’s
80 Strand, London WC2R 0RL
Chapter One
fn1 At Captain Adventure’s Water Park.
fn1 SBD = SILENT BUT DEADLY
Darcy Burdock Page 13
