Clark stood up. He had to get some fresh air. The little bedroom suddenly felt suffocatingly small. And the longer he sat in there, the harder it was to keep his thoughts off of Carmen’s body; the soft and sensual tightening of her body around his fingers as he pleasured her…
Clark growled to himself. Why did it seem like nothing was going right? He tore out of the bedroom and down the stairs. He didn’t know what he wanted to do, but he couldn’t just sit still. There was too much going on around him that he didn’t like.
Usually, working on his bike or the truck would make him feel better, but now he associated both of those things with Carmen. His feelings for her were just one more thing on the list of shit he didn’t know how to deal with. No, he would go have a little talk with Alexander. Maybe that would clear a thing or two up for him.
***
“What do you want?” Alexander asked when Clark stormed through the doors. “You don’t have an appointment. I’m a busy man. Especially now that –”
“Especially now that what?” Clark demanded, lunging toward Alexander and grabbing the lapels of his grey jacket. “Now that your sick little buddies are trying to rule the show and they’ve made you their one-trick pony?”
Alexander smirked and pulled away from Clark’s grip. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Sure you don’t, Alex.”
“It’s Alexander.”
“What’s in it for you?” Clark demanded, letting go of Alexander’s lapel and slamming his fist on the redwood desk separating them. “What makes you think you have a better chance at happiness by betraying your pack?”
“Who says that I’m betraying my pack?” Alexander asked, folding his hands calmly out in front of him. “In reality, is it not my pack who has betrayed me?”
Clark sank down into the chair opposite Alex and stared at him incredulously. “What the hell are you talking about, little man?”
“That’s exactly it!” Alex exclaimed. “That’s the attitude I’m talking about. Not once in all my life has any of you just accepted me as I am. So I’m not a big burly monster. So what? So my inclinations lie more in numbers and statistics over beating someone else senseless. Does that make me inferior? Because you have all certainly implied that it has. I never once felt like I belonged here with you or in this community. Nobody has ever given me the feeling of the belonging you are so passionately defending. You have all betrayed me. I may be a member of the pack but I am not treated like it. You think I don’t know that you all resent me? Make fun of me?”
Clark sighed loudly, his eyes following Alex as the little man rose from his seat and made his impassioned speech, curling his fist passionately and striking the air above his head with it to enunciate his points.
“Alex, just give it to me straight. Who are the outsiders and what do they want?”
“I know as much as you do,” Alexander said, his beady eyes sparkling. “I don’t know why you insist on trying to pry information from me that I don’t have.”
“Do you really feel like we betrayed you, Alexander?” Clark asked with a deep sigh. “Because you never seemed to want anything to do with us. We tried to include you. We always tried, but you acted like you were above it all. You treated us like we were mindless brutes.”
Alexander pursed his lips defiantly in an expression that nearly made Clark pummel him. “It’s not my fault for stating the obvious. There were far too many times I remember being made fun of for my inclinations. But I’m not just some useless omega, you know. I have quite a lot of power in this town. More than you would ever know. And I didn’t have to shift into my wolf form and pulverize my best friends to get it, either. Unlike you lot. It’s despicable, really.”
“Oh, is it?” Clark growled through his gritted teeth. “And you’re not? Betraying your pack for what?”
“I’d be careful what kind of accusations you make here, Mr. Thomas,” Alexander said, his eyes flashing. “The power dynamics are changing whether you like it or not, and if you want your family to have a nice, secure place in the world, challenging me is not the way to go about it.”
The mention of his family made Clark balk. If anything happened to Rachel because of his big mouth, he would never forgive himself.
“Alex, I never knew you felt that way about us. But we’re still your pack. Maybe if you were honest with us about how you felt, things would have been different. Stewing in your own juices isn’t doing anybody any favors.”
Clark rose and glared into Alexander’s eyes, biting back all of the angry words he wanted to say. If the people infiltrating the hierarchy could take his job, who knew what else they were capable of? Apparently, bullying Alexander into talking was not the course of action to take.
He left, allowing the heavy oak door to slam behind him and separate himself from Alex. Something wasn’t right about all of this. He couldn’t put his finger on exactly what was going on quite yet, but he had confidence that sooner or later, all would be revealed.
Clark could only hope that it wasn’t as bad as he thought it would be.
14.
“Hi…mom?”
Carmen listened to the silence on the other end of the line, her chest tight.
“Carmen?” her mother’s voice finally said. “It’s kind of early for you to call, you know.”
Carmen sighed. Her parents were not early risers. In fact, she was something of an anomaly in many ways, being self-motivated enough to leave the house before 9am and come back early for bed; getting a job while she was in high school and paying her own way through college with grants, scholarships, and good old fashioned hard work.
“Sorry, I know. I thought you’d be awake by 2pm.”
“Well I am, but your father’s not. You’re lucky I heard the phone before he did.”
Carmen sighed. Things were always so strained when her father was around, whether he was on a bender or simply recovering from one. It was usually one or the other.
“Okay, sorry about that,” Carmen apologized again, already regretting the call. “I had a surprise for you.”
“You know I don’t like surprises,” her mother said. Carmen could almost imagine her ringing her hands nervously. Her mother suffered from a well-earned case of extreme anxiety, and it was always worse when Carmen’s father was in the picture.
But for some reason, her mother just couldn’t say no to him. It had made for a very rocky foundation growing up. Most kids don’t wish for their parents to get divorced, but Carmen had. In fact, the school had called with concerns when she wrote Santa a letter in class asking to get her parents a divorce for Christmas.
“I know, mom. That’s why I’m calling instead of just showing up. I thought I’d spend the summer with you and dad. There’s not much going on on campus and I thought maybe…”
Carmen’s mother was silent for a few moments.
“That might not be such a great idea, honey,” she said finally. “You know, things have just gotten into a good place with your father and me, and I would hate for…”
“You don’t want me to mess it up,” Carmen said softly. Her mother didn’t seem to hear.
“Well, it’s just that your father always worries more when there’s another mouth to feed, and as much as we would love to see you, he’s been under a lot of pressure lately, and…”
“I understand,” Carmen said, a lump in her throat forming. She should have guessed that the second her father was back, she wouldn’t be welcome at home anymore. Her mother cared more about keeping him happy so he would stay home than she did about anything else. It was unhealthy, really.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. But we’ll definitely see each other during Christmas, won’t we?”
“Of course,” Carmen said, clearing her throat. But the lump wouldn’t go away. She hated her father more than she could ever describe. But in a way, she hated her mother more for her weakness.
“Great! So how have you been anyway? It’s been a while since we spoke.”
“I’m great. I’ve been spending some time with a friend…”
“A boy friend?” her mother asked conspiratorially. Carmen flinched as an unwanted memory of her tryst with Clark invaded her mind.
“No,” she said firmly. It seemed like her mother was overly-invested in seeing her daughter find the man she wanted to marry. Her father had always commented on how weird it was that a girl as pretty as Carmen was didn’t date more. Who didn’t like male attention?
But Carmen had always thought that her parent’s preoccupation with the opposite sex was biased. It was better to be on her own, wasn’t it?
“Well, I hope you have fun with your friend, sweetheart,” her mother said.
“Yeah, she invited me to stay for –”
“Oh honey, I have to go, I think your father is waking up. I haven’t even started breakfast yet.”
There was a twinge of resentment in her mother’s voice, as if she were mad that Carmen had gotten in the way of serving her husband’s every need. But Carmen knew it was because of her father’s terrible temper and tried not to take it too personally.
“Bye, mom.”
But the receiver had already been hung up on her mother’s end and Carmen was left holding the phone with hot, silent tears streaming down her face.
“Why are you crying?”
Carmen’s body was electrified by Clark’s deep voice behind her and she whipped around, surprised by his sudden appearance.
“How long have you been standing there?” she asked, wiping her tears away with her sleeve.
“This is my house, I’ll stand where I want,” he said defiantly, and Carmen glowered.
“It’s still rude to eavesdrop,” she said. “I know about your super shifter senses.”
Clark grinned briefly and took a step toward Carmen. “Are you all right?”
The lump returned to her throat and Carmen could have kicked herself for it. The last thing she needed was to look weak in front of a shifter. Clark in particular.
“I’m fine,” she lied, turning away from him and stalking to the living room sofa. She sat down in a huff and turned the TV on, hoping to tune Clark out and distract herself from her tears, but they were already flooding back.
“You don’t sound fine,” Clark insisted, following her. “Who were you talking to?”
“Seriously, don’t you just mind your own business?” Carmen exclaimed, wiping her eyes quickly and trying to hide her face from Clark.
Clark sat down beside her.
“Usually. But not when people are feeling so bad. What happened?”
Carmen sighed. “I was talking to my mom.”
“And?”
“And I was hoping to go home for a while. You know, to get out of your hair. But she doesn’t want me there.”
“Why wouldn’t she want you there?” Clark asked, genuinely puzzled. “She’s your mother.”
“Well, she’s not a fantastic mother. And besides, it has more to do with my less fantastic father.”
“I see,” Clark said thoughtfully. “Why?”
“Because he’s a worthless alcoholic, that’s why. She’s afraid if I come home I’ll rock the boat. She says things have been better with him lately. It’s what she always says before they get unbearable again.”
The tears began to spill in earnest and Clark quickly gathered Carmen up in his arms. She couldn’t help but take comfort in the feeling of his strong arms around her, as if he would be willing to protect her from anything. But the pain she was feeling was inside. Not even Clark’s strength could take that threat away. It was always inside of her.
“I’ll tell you what,” Clark said, his deep voice rumbling in her ear. “You can call this your home, for the summer or for however long you want it. All right? I don’t know what made you think I wanted you out of my hair, but I get it. Things probably feel as awkward for you as they do for me. But we can be adults about this, right?”
Carmen nodded miserably against Clark’s broad chest and he kissed her on the cheek, his stubble scraping against her as he pulled away.
“I don’t want you to go anywhere. Not unless this town goes to shit. Then I want you and Rachel to take off somewhere safe while I do my best to take care of it. Understand?”
“Yeah,” Carmen whispered.
“Good,” Clark said, smiling down at her. “I don’t want you to ever feel like you’re not wanted, all right? Your daddy sounds like a fuckin’ moron, if you ask me. And your mom’s too lovesick to see it. You’re better off keeping your distance. Things like that have a way of sucking you in and making you feel like you’re not good enough.”
Clark stretched, swiping a tear off of Carmen’s cheek with a finger.
“Cheer up, honey. It’s all going to be fine.”
And with that, he left the room, leaving Carmen in a daze on the couch behind him.
15.
It had taken just about all Clark had not to demand Carmen’s address from Rachel so he could go up there himself to give her useless parents a piece of his mind. He paced furiously back and forth in his room, imagining just what he would say to them.
As a parent, he took this kind of thing even more personally. He had given up everything to take care of Rachel after her mother had died. Everything. But there were still people out there who wouldn’t do shit for their kids. Even let them visit home when they wanted to. What the hell was wrong with humans?
But it wasn’t just humans, Clark had to remind himself. There were plenty of shifters who resented their pups so much they’d as soon let them starve as feed them. Nature was cruel, and sometimes, precious things were gifted to those who would never be able to fully appreciate them. It was a harsh fact of life.
Still, it was wrong. Plain and simple. Anyone who could put that pain on the face of such a pure, innocent person deserved whatever misery came to them.
“Clark?”
“Missy? What the hell are you doing here?” Clark asked, shocked by the sudden appearance of the woman he usually hoped to forget.
“Sorry, your daughter’s friend let me in. She is a cute little thing, don’t you think?”
Missy’s eyes flashed knowingly at him and Clark’s heart hammered in his chest. Missy had always been a sharp one, especially when it came to the women Clark was interested in. It was almost like she could smell the girls on him, or him on them.
“Poor thing’s having a hard time with her parents,” Clark said quickly. “It’s hard to see a young thing suffer like that.”
The rage filled Clark’s chest again and Missy raised her eyebrows.
“I see,” she said.
“Why are you here?” Clark asked, a little bit more gruffly than he had meant to. Still, it was strange to have her here, in his bedroom, in the place where he and Carmen had…especially when Missy was looking at him with such disapproval.
“Well, David and I were talking and he felt you might need to speak with someone who has a little more…sway.”
“Oh really?”
Missy smiled tightly. “I guess neither of us knew that person would have to be a little girl that your daughter brought home from school.”
“Know your place in my home,” Clark growled, his eyes flashing. “And get to the point before I escort you out of here.”
“That’s the thing now, isn’t it?” Missy asked, her eyes roaming Clark. “You don’t have a place here anymore. Just like everybody else. We’re getting kicked out of our own territory, Clark. It’s happening more and more every day. When are you going to stand up to these outsiders and do something about it?”
“What can I do about it? Lobos told me to stand down! And if I don’t, who knows what will happen? Don’t you remember the last time I meddled in higher affairs? How many people died?”
Missy grew somber. “Yes. I lost my parents in the craze. You lost your wife. But you do understand that there is a time and a place to step in, and just as you did then, that time is now.”
“
I’m not going to risk any more lives. If you don’t like that, you should just leave me the hell alone about it. Do you understand?”
Missy sighed, and backed up toward the door.
“I thought you were different, Clark. I get that you were grieving, and I even get having a crush on that cute little girl out there. But I will never understand what will compel you to keep your head down.”
“Missy…”
“All right, I’m leaving. But David is organizing a meeting that he wanted me to invite you to at his place tonight. It’s very hush-hush, word of mouth, you know. If you don’t get involved, the pack is going to take matters into their own hands. And you know that’s going to be much more dangerous than if you took care of things yourself.”
Clark was startled by the news, but he supposed it made sense. He had been dishonored in front of them, after all. As far as they knew, he held little to no rank in the pack as he once had. Still, the news was infuriating, and Clark wasn’t very happy at the messenger, either.
“Good bye, Missy.”
Missy opened her mouth as if to say something else, but she seemed to think better of it.
“Good bye, Clark. Good luck with your temptress.”
Clark growled and Missy laughed bitterly as she closed the bedroom door behind herself.
He waited until he heard the engine of her car start and leave his property before he allowed himself to move again. So everybody was trying to do their own thing and get involved. The outsiders had made that much of an impact already?
It wasn’t that he was surprised by the news, exactly, but more surprised that the others had jumped the gun without Clark’s go-ahead. Usually, they consulted him during these types of matters, and sure, they had been asking him to get involved over the past few months. But organizing a meeting without his permission? One he was invited to rather than conducting? That was kind of a hit to his pride.
He would just have to go to the meeting and find out exactly what was on their minds. It was for their own good. Hopefully, his sway over them hadn’t lessened because of his change in rank and he would be able to talk some sense into them before things got really ugly.
Dragon Protector (Dragon Dreams) Page 16
