“If you really think that then I believe I have officially found the coolest girl in the world.”
“I do believe that. I sometimes think that the kids who have to go through a bit of a struggle in life grow up to be the best kind. Not that you want your kids to struggle of course, but it does make them appreciate life later on. That’s probably why you’re so amazing, and why Trinity will be even more so.”
I smiled. “That’s a nice way of looking at it. So, tell me about your life, Ken. I’ve been wanting to ask you this all week but didn’t want to do it in front of Trinity. She said you were an orphan?”
Kennedy turned to face me. The sun was shining on her face when she looked up, so she reached for her sunglasses and put them on.
“Oh, it’s not a big deal. I grew up without my parents. They died when I was very young, and I don’t remember them at all. I was moved from foster home to foster home.”
“I’m sorry,” I said. The thought of Kennedy as a little girl getting shipped between families broke my heart.
She shook her head. “Don’t be. It’s all I knew anyway. It was normal for me. And anyway, it wasn’t all that bad. Sometimes I got put with amazing families. I got to experience different family lives and different cultures. It was interesting.”
“You’re amazing; you know that?”
She laughed. “No, I’m not. I promise you; it’s all so normal to me. Sure, I wished I had a family, but there was nothing I could do about it. And I really did meet some amazing people along the way.”
“Are you still in touch with any of them?”
“A few. It’s easy now with email and Facebook. We don’t see each other as much as I’d like, but it’s okay.”
“Trinity is lucky to have you, you know.”
She grinned. “You know, Reed, you’re an amazing father. I know you doubt yourself, but you shouldn’t. I’ve been around a lot of families, and I’ve seen both sides of the coin. I’ve seen what’s like for kids to have good fathers and kids to have bad fathers. You’re one of the good guys. You shouldn’t beat yourself up over it.”
I sat up and looked over at Trinity, who was still playing with the girls. They’d created some sort of tower out of the wet sand, and I could see her talking confidently to everyone around her. She looked happy. I thought about what Angela had said to me about me not being a good father, and I wasn’t so sure that I believed her anymore. Trinity seemed like a happy child, and I’d done the best that I could with her. I lay back down and kissed Kennedy on the forehead.
“Thanks for saying that.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Kennedy
Leaving the hotel room was a sad day for Trinity and I. We both walked around the room, saying goodbye to all the different rooms and elements.
“Goodbye, balcony,” I said.
“Goodbye, lamp,” she replied.
“Goodbye coffee machine.”
“Goodbye, bath.”
“Come on, you two,” Reed said. He was standing in the doorway waiting for us to finish our tour of the hotel room. A smile was playing on his face as he watched us. “Why do I get the feeling that the two of you are trying to prolong this?”
I laughed. “Because we are. We don’t to leave.”
“Neither do I,” Reed admitted. “But sadly, we have a plane to catch. And I have a job to get back to.”
I sighed. “What a pity. Trin and I were just talking about how you should become a doctor at Disney World and how we could spend our days just going on rides and running around like lunatics while you go to work. I would become a chef for one of the restaurants nearby, and Trinity would be my assistant. We will work only a few hours a day of course. I mean, we need maximum time for fun. You see, we have the whole thing planned out.”
Trinity was giggling beside me. “It’s our new dream, Daddy.”
Reed laughed. “Sounds like a good dream to me. Come on, you crazy girls. Let’s go. I’m giving you five seconds. If you don’t come out the door by the time I’ve reached five, I’m going to have to drag you out by your feet. One, two, three . . . .”
“Quick,” I said, and Trinity and I bolted out. Trinity was laughing so hard she was battling to breathe. I smiled at Reed. I had never seen Trinity as happy as she was right then. It had been a good week for all of us.
On the flight home, Trinity could not stop talking. She looked exhausted though, even though she’d gotten a full night’s rest, and I could see the activities from the week were starting to catch up with her. But she was forcing herself to stay awake, talking non-stop and telling us the same stories she’d told us all week. It was hard not to feel happy with her around. It had been a great week, and things between all of us had been wonderful.
My only concern was that we were starting to act like a family. Reed and I had not had the most conventional start to our relationship. We hadn’t gone on dates to get to know another; we hadn’t slowly made our way from kissing to sex. And with Trinity around, we didn’t get the chance to just be boyfriend and girlfriend without any strings attached. She was always on both of our minds, and we were both very aware of the fact that she would get hurt if we were to break up. We hadn’t even officially announced what we were. Not to the world, and not even to each other. It was as if we hadn’t needed any labels to show that we cared for each other. We just fit into each other’s lives perfectly. It was a bit nerve wracking that we had gone from strangers to being a family together, but there was nothing that we could do to slow it down. And I wasn’t sure that we could suddenly start pulling away from each other now. Especially not after the incredible week that we had just experienced together.
When we got out of the plane, we called a cab and all climbed into together. Five minutes later, I saw that Trinity was fast asleep. I motioned to Reed and pointed at her.
“I knew this would happen,” I said. “You could tell she was exhausted. Poor kid didn’t want to miss a thing, though. She’s probably only sleeping now because we’re going home. She had a great time, didn’t she?”
“She told me that it was the best week of her life,” Reed said fondly. “I don’t know about you, but I have to agree with her.”
“Oh, me too. Thanks for taking the week off work. I know it’s not always easy for you to do that.”
“Ah, it was worth it. I’m sad to be home.”
“Me too.”
We spent the next half hour in comfortable silence while the driver took us back home. I looked outside and watched as the streets became more and more familiar. I’d always loved Seattle, so I didn’t mind being home. What I was most sad about wasn’t the fact that we were back home, but rather that we weren’t away on vacation acting like a family. I was going to back home and sleep in my own bed, and in the morning I would wake up without Reed and without Trinity. I was surprised at how sad that made me. I’d always loved being alone. I used to tell Camille that my biggest concern with meeting someone was that I would get sick of them. I had been alone for most of my life, and it was something that I thought was engrained in me. I hadn’t realized just how much I actually needed someone until now. I’d just never met the right person. I turned to Reed and smiled at him. He was looking out the window, a contemplative look on his face, and I resisted the urge to tell him how sexy he was in front of the driver.
We climbed out the car and collected our suitcases, thanking the driver. Reed had Trinity in his arms, and she was still fast asleep. I was just about to open up for us when I saw that someone was waiting for us in the doorway.
“Angela?” Reed said.
I stood there, staring at the woman in front of us. We should’ve known that she wasn’t going to give up so easily. Just like that, the happy feelings from the holiday disappeared.
“What are you doing here?” Reed asked, his voice quiet but livid.
“What do you think? Oh, is that Trinity? Oh, let me see her. Wow, she’s so big now,” Angela said, moving forward.
Reed took a fe
w steps back and looked at me.
“Can you take her inside?” he said to me.
I nodded. I opened the door and took Trinity from Reed, grateful that she was still asleep. I quickly walked in and took her to her bedroom, where I placed her in her bed. The moment her head touched the pillow, she opened her eyes and looked at me in confusion.
“Are we back at the hotel?” she asked me.
I shook my head. “No, we’re back home. You’re in bed now. Come on, get some sleep.”
“What about you and Daddy?” she asked.
“We’ll get some sleep too,” I lied. “I think we all need it. How about I wake you up a bit later with some hot cocoa?”
She smiled. “Okay.”
She closed her eyes, and I waited several minutes to make sure that she was sleeping before switching off the light and walking out. I closed the door behind me and took several breaths before trying to decide what to do. Finally, I decided to go out and see what was going on. I’d been with Reed the entire week, and I felt like I had the right to know what was going on.
I walked outside and closed the door behind me. There were now two closed doors between us and Trinity and the thought made me feel a bit better.
“She’s sleeping,” I said to Reed.
“Who the hell are you? Oh, you’re the nanny!” Angela said.
“Yes, I am,” I answered simply.
“She’s more than that,” Reed said. It probably wasn’t the best time for Reed to be sticking up for me, but it was still nice that he had.
“Oh yeah?” Angela said. “Well, fancy that. I guess you couldn’t find anyone else.”
I shook my head. “Angela, what do you want from Reed? You left him six years ago. Six long years ago. Why are you back?”
Angela looked at me with narrowed eyes. “What does it have to do with you? This is between myself and Reed now. So, if you don’t mind, maybe you should leave. Or go inside and do your nanny duty.”
“Angela, don’t be rude. Kennedy is my girlfriend,” he said. It was the first time he had referred to me as his girlfriend, and even though the situation was a little crazy, I couldn’t help but smile at the word. “And you have not been here for six years. Kennedy has been more of a mother to Trinity in the last few months than you have been in her entire life. So, she can stay.”
Angela laughed. “Is that so?”
“Yes, it’s so.”
Angela turned to look at me again. “Kennedy,” she said. Her voice was calm and steady. “Are you in love with Reed?” she asked.
The question took me by surprise. He’d called me his girlfriend for the first time a few seconds ago. Love was a whole new thing that we hadn’t yet discussed. I looked at Reed, and in that instant, I knew what my answer was going to be.
“Yes,” I said simply.
“Okay, that means you probably know a lot about him.”
“Yes, I think I do,” I answered. I sometimes felt like he was the person I knew best in my life, despite the fact that I hadn’t known him for that long.
“Then you’ll also know that he’s still married to me.”
I stood there, letting the words sink in, as I looked at Angela, and then at Reed, and then back at Angela again.
“What?”
“Ah, so you don’t know everything about him then. I had a funny little feeling that he hadn’t told you that.”
“Is this true?” I asked Reed.
Reed didn’t answer me. Instead, he glared at Angela. “Get off my property.”
“Oh come on, Reed. The fun is just beginning,” Angela said.
“Angela. Get. Off. My. Property. Right. Now.” His words came out scattered, as if he had to take a deep breath between each one.
“Okay, okay, I’m leaving. But this is not the last time you’ll hear from me,” she said to him. Then she turned to look at me and grinned. “Ah, going out with a married man. How could you?” she said and walked off.
We stood there in silence, waiting for her to leave. Then I turned to Reed.
“Is it true?”
Reed sighed. “Yes, I didn’t sign the paperwork. I just . . . I forgot, I guess.”
“You forgot? How could you forget that you were still married? Were you hoping all this time that she would come back and that the two of you would just carry on where you left off? Is that what you wanted?”
“No, no. Of course not. I never thought I’d ever meet anyone again. I never thought I’d even want to get married again. I wanted to stay clear of the whole thing. I . . . I’m so sorry.”
“All this time. Do you even realize that you’ve been calling her your ex-wife to me? That sort of implies that you’re not married anymore, you know.”
“I know. I know. But I’ve thought of her as my ex-wife for such a long time. We’re divorced. We just don’t have the paperwork to prove it. But in my mind, we are divorced.”
I looked at Reed and shook my head. “And in my mind, you’re still married. In my mind, you lied to me. You’ve had plenty of time to open up to me, Reed. Plenty of time to tell me the truth. I’m leaving now. I can’t deal with this right now.”
“No, please don’t go, Ken. Please stay.”
“It’s my day off tomorrow. Do me a favor and don’t contact me,” I said. I picked up my bags and walked straight to my car, not daring to look back.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Reed
I stood there, feeling helpless as I watched Kennedy drive away. I wanted to go after her, but I couldn’t leave Trinity in the house all alone. I reached for my phone and called her, but she didn’t pick up. I left messages, begging her to come back, but she didn’t return them. For a long time, I just stood outside, not wanting to believe that she had left me. When I finally dragged myself back into the house, I felt loneliness take hold of me. It reminded me of the way I had felt when Angela had first left me. Six years ago, I’d stood in the same spot, with Trinity fast asleep, and wondered what on earth I was going to do and how I was going to manage by myself. I’d finally let someone into my life again, and I was back to where I had started. I’d come full circle. I collapsed on the sofa, unsure of what to do with myself. In a way, Trinity was my saving grace. If she hadn’t been there, I was sure to have hit the bottle in order to forget. I could almost understand why my father had once done the same. I had never been much of a drinker, but at that moment, the thought of dulling the pain was far too close for comfort.
I switched on the TV, flipped channels until I found something that looked interesting, and then tried to lose myself in it. Fake laughter filled the room, and a show I had once found funny now seemed lifeless and depressing. But I kept it on, and I continued to watch for the next two hours. Every few minutes I’d look at my phone as if willing it to ring. I sent a few messages to Kennedy, but she didn’t respond to one of them. And then, when I finally felt my eyelids start to close, I switched off the TV and went to bed. After a full week of sleeping with Kennedy in my arms, the bed felt like the saddest place to be. I reached out for the second pillow and hugged it instead.
It took me a long time to fall asleep despite being exhausted, and in the morning I lay staring at the empty space beside me. I looked at the clock and knew that I should get up and make my daughter breakfast, but I couldn’t seem to find the energy. Trinity came in moments later and jumped onto the bed beside me.
“Where’s Kennedy?” she asked.
“She’s at home. It’s her day off today, remember?”
She sighed. “Oh yeah, I forgot. I was used to her being here.”
“You and me both, kiddo.”
“Daddy, I woke up before you today,” she said.
I smiled. “You sure did. I’m feeling tired today.”
She chuckled. “Tired? But you just woke up.”
“I know. Isn’t that crazy? I think it’s because I was silly and I stayed up to watch TV instead of going to bed.”
“That is silly. I fell asleep in the car. I remember waking
up, and I was in bed. I was so confused.”
I chuckled. “You were fast asleep. You were snoring so loud in the car that the cab driver asked us if there was a little animal in the car.”
“No I wasn’t!” she said and giggled.
“Nah, just kidding. But you were fast asleep. That part I didn’t make up.”
“Daddy, why are you sad?”
“What? Why do you think I’m sad?”
“Because I can see. You know you always tell me that you can see when I’m sad. Well, I can do the same with you.”
I sighed. I’d been lying in bed thinking that it was time I told my daughter the truth, and I knew now that I couldn’t hide away from it any longer. Angela was sure to come back, and I’d rather Trinity found out the truth from me than from her.
“Trin, there’s something I need to tell you. I’m going to be completely honest with you about all of this because I know that you’re a big girl now, and you can handle it. But remember it’s okay to feel sad or angry, and if you have any questions, I want you to ask me, and I promise to answer truthfully. Okay?”
She nodded. “Okay, Daddy.”
I took a deep breath. “Your mother has come back.”
Her eyes widened. “My mother? My real mother?”
I nodded. “Your real mother. I haven’t seen her in six years, since the day she left us. And now she’s back.”
“What does she want?”
I shrugged. “I honestly have no idea. She wants me back, I guess. She wants to see you. I don’t know. I don’t know her anymore. Six years is a long time.”
“That’s how long I’ve been living,” Trinity said.
“Exactly, it’s a long time. Now, I want to talk to you about it. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to tell you because I didn’t want you to feel upset or sad. But I think it’s good that you know what’s going on.”
“Because I’m a big girl now?”
“Yes, because you’re a big girl now and I know you can handle the truth. I don’t know why your mother left us all those years ago and I don’t know why she’s back. But she’s your mother, and you have every right to see her if you want to. I want you to know that I’m not going to stop you. If you want to see her, then I will make sure that you do. Okay?”
Dirty Daddy_The Maxwell Family Page 17
