by Lope de Vega
This is for our common sickness.*
LEONOR. And that?
FABIA. That's not for your eyes, 295
My dear, even though you die
Of curiosity.
LEONOR. Oh, please, do tell me!
FABIA. Well, there's this girl. She's desperate
To marry, but now has been deceived
By a gentleman from Saragossa. 300
She's put the matter in my hands,
And being such a goodly soul
I plan to help her,* to see if they
Can't live in peace.
INÉS. What's this?
FABIA. Tooth-powder,
Hand-soap, pills, unusual and useful things. 305
INÉS. And this?
FABIA. Just prayers. The souls in heaven
Owe much to me.
INÉS. And here's a letter!
FABIA. You seized on that as if it was
Addressed to you! I want it back!
It doesn't do to be so curious! 310
INÉS. I want to read it!
FABIA. A certain gentleman
Lives here. He's handsome and intelligent
And madly loves a certain lady.
He's promised me a chain if I
Deliver this, bearing in mind 315
Her honour and her modesty.
The trouble is that, though he wants
To marry her, I dare not do it.
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I wonder if you, most beautiful Inés --
The thought has just occurred to me -- 320
Could write me a reply, and I'll
Pretend it comes from her.
INÉS. No doubt
It will guarantee the chain. Alright,
I'll do it.
FABIA. God bless you, miss, and may
Your life be long and happy. Read 325
The letter.
INÉS. I'll go inside and bring
You the reply.
[Exit INÉS
LEONOR. A cunning scheme indeed!
FABIA. Come fires of hell, satanic flames!*
Consume the heart of this young maiden!
Enter DON RODRIGOand DON FERNANDO.
RODRIGO. Until I marry her, must I 330
Endure all these inconveniences?
FERNANDO. A man who is in love is bound
To suffer.*
RODRIGO. Your lady is at home.
FABIA. These fools and nuisances! What brings
Them here?
RODRIGO. Instead of mine, this hag! 335
FABIA. The payment would be very welcome.
I'm so very poor!
LEONOR. I'll see to it
My sister pays you.
FERNANDO. My dearest
Leonor, if there is something here
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You'd like to have, despite the fact 340
That this old lady only seems
To have mere odds and ends, and not
The jewels you deserve, please let
Me pay.
LEONOR. But we've bought nothing. The lady
Attends to the household laundry. 345
RODRIGO. Is not Don Pedro here?
LEONOR. He'll be back
From the country soon.
RODRIGO. And Doña Inés?
LEONOR. Attending to the laundry woman.
RODRIGO. She saw me coming and decided to
Escape! So is my constancy 350
Rewarded by her scant regard!
Enter DOÑA INÉS.
LEONOR. She's coming. Inés, Fabia wants
The laundry list.
INÉS. I have it here.
The boy you spoke of. Make sure that he
Receives it.
FABIA. Oh, Doña Inés, happy 355
The water that washes linen fine
As this, that not long since has touched
Such perfect skin! Ten towels, six
Chemises, four cloths, two cushion covers,
Six gentleman's shirts, eight bed-sheets . . . 360
I'll get them back to you whiter than
The whites of your eyes.
RODRIGO. Dear lady, be
So good as to sell me the paper.
I'll pay you well, so I can hold
In these two hands something at least 365
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From those ungrateful hands of hers.
FABIA. If I agreed to sell you this,
We'd do some business, sir, for sure!
Goodbye to you, my precious girls.
[Exit FABIA
RODRIGO. That paper should have stayed here, not 370
Been taken.
LEONOR. Retrieve it if you wish.
Perhaps you'd like to check that it's
In order.
INÉS. Father's arrived. It's best
You leave, or pay him your respects.
He never says a word but, truth 375
To tell, doesn't like you seeing us
Alone.
RODRIGO. I pray that either Love
Or Death provide me with a remedy
For your disdain: Love, by granting me
A favour to reduce the pain 380
Of your harshness; Death, by ending
My life forever. But neither will,
I know, assist me. Caught between
The two of them, I cannot see
The path ahead, for love will not 385
Allow me to enjoy your favour;
And since I am obliged to love,
It forces me to ask that you
Become the agent of my death.*
Ungrateful woman, kill the man 390
Who worships you. If you'll not be
My life, then be my death! All things
That live are born of love, sustained
By love until they die according to
That cruel law which ends all lives. 395
If all my suffering is not
Enough to satisfy love's harsh
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Demands, nor great enough to put
An end to me, then I am surely more
Than mortal, for neither life nor death 400
Can do me good or ill.
[Exit DON RODRIGOand DON FERNANDO
INÉS. Whoever saw such foolishness?
LEONOR. I'd say that yours was just as great.
INÉS. You mean the letter, obviously.
Since when does love behave discreetly? 405
LEONOR. Since when does love oblige you to reply
To someone you don't even know?
INÉS. I think it's just a ruse, devised
By our handsome stranger, to see
If I am interested or not. 410
LEONOR. My thoughts exactly.
INÉS. Then you'll agree
He's been discreet. I'll read his poem.
[Reads
'At Medina's fair* my eyes have seen
The loveliest peasant-girl the sun
Has gazed upon in journeying 415
From rosy dawn to where it sets.
A brightly coloured shoe adorned
The base of such a beautiful
And slender pillar,* and drew to it
The eyes and souls of each admirer. 420
That any shoe should prove victorious,
When eyes, as we all know, can be
The death of love, is quite miraculous.
And so, surrendering to her, I say:
"Oh, sweet Inés, if I am now 425
Destroyed by your feet, what fate
Awaits me in your lovely eyes?"'*
LEONOR. It seems this suitor wants to dance
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With you, Inés.
INÉS. My feet are just
His starting-point; he'll end by asking for 430
My hand.
LEONOR. So what was your reply?
INÉS. I told him he should come tonight . . .
To the garden gate.
LEONOR. Have you gone mad?
INÉS. I don't intend to speak to him.
LEONOR. Then what?
INÉS. Just come with me and you'll 435
Find out.
LEONOR. You are a fool and rash
With it.
INÉS. But when was love not so?
LEONOR. A girl should turn her back on love
As soon as she's aware of it.
INÉS. First love is irresistible. 440
When Nature rules, * how can a girl
Be sensible?
Exit both. Enter DON ALONSO, TELLO, and FABIA.
FABIA. It must have been
At least four thousand vicious blows!
TELLO. Which goes to show how well you must
Have done the business!
FABIA. I suppose 445
You think you can do better.
ALONSO. Such madness to
Aspire to heaven itself!
TELLO. And Fabia
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Condemned to all Hell's torments to raise
You up to Paradise!
FABIA. Oh, pity Fabia!
TELLO. So who were the wicked sacristans who made 450
A pulpit of your back?*
FABIA. Two lackeys and
Three pages. I lost my hood. My dress
Was torn to shreds.
ALONSO. What matters most,
Good mother, is that your blessed face
Is still intact. Oh, what a fool 455
I was to put my faith in those
Two treacherous eyes, those diamonds
Which offered me encouragement
And now have led me to my death!
My punishment is just. Accept 460
This purse, good lady. Tello, saddle up!
Tonight we leave for Olmedo.
TELLO. But why? It's getting dark.
ALONSO. If I
Stay here, I know I'll die.
FABIA. My boy,
Don't get excited. Courage! Fabia brings 465
Your remedy.
ALONSO. A note!
FABIA. A note indeed!
ALONSO. Is this a trick?
FABIA. It's from the girl
Herself, replying to your lovely poem.
ALONSO. Tello, kneel before this saint!
TELLO. I think
You'd better read it first. Who knows? 470
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It might contain some savage blows,
Disguised as toothpicks!
ALONSO [reads]. 'Eager to know* if you are who I think
you are, and hoping that you prove to be so, I suggest you
come tonight to the garden gate of this house. There 475
you shall find a green ribbon from my shoe. Wear it on
your hat tomorrow, so I may know you.'
FABIA. So what's she say?
ALONSO. I can't pay you
Enough or say how overjoyed
I am.
TELLO. It's obvious, then. No need 480
To saddle up tonight. Hear that, my beauties?
Calm yourselves! We're staying in
Medina.
ALONSO. Night falls, advancing coldly where
The day begins to take its leave.
To appear at the garden gate I need 485
To look my best. It could well be
That she, inspired by love, will want
To see who takes the ribbon. I'll go
And change my clothes.
[Exit ALONSO
TELLO. I have to go
As well, Fabia; to get him dressed 490
For these night-watchman's duties.*
FABIA. No, wait.
TELLO. But he can't dress himself without
My help, not in the state he's in.
FABIA. Just leave him to it. You have to come
With me.
TELLO. With you?
FABIA. With me!
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TELLO. What, me? 495
FABIA. Yes, you! It has to do with your master.
TELLO. So what d'you want me for?
FABIA. You'll be
My bodyguard. A woman feels
Much safer with a man around.
I need a tooth,* from a highwayman 500
Hanged yesterday.
TELLO. You mean he's not
Been buried?
FABIA. Right.
TELLO. So what's your plan?
FABIA. I need to pull the tooth. And you'll
Accompany me.
TELLO. I think I'd rather stay
At home. Have you gone mad?
FABIA. Don't be 505
A coward! Wherever I go, you have
To follow.
TELLO. But you have dealings with
The Devil!
FABIA. Move yourself!
TELLO. I would
If you instructed me to kill
A dozen men, but messing with 510
The dead . . .!
FABIA. If you don't come,
I'll get the Devil himself to come
And visit you.
TELLO. All right! I'll do it!
Are you a woman or a demon?
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FABIA. You'll carry the ladder. You've no 515
Experience of such matters.
TELLO. That's true.
And yet I know that he who climbs
Too high may come a cropper!
Enter DON RODRIGO and DON FERNANDO,
dressed in dark clothing.
FERNANDO. Why come here merely to see the house?
It seems so pointless.
RODRIGO. This gate provides 520
At least some consolation. Perhaps
Her lovely hands have touched its bars.
Each day her hands caress them, each night
I offer them my soul. The more
Her cruel disdain attempts to kill 525
My love, the more it burns. Her coldness sets
My heart on fire. See how these bars
Are softened by my sorrow, and yet
That lovely angel is unmoved
By someone who can melt the hardest iron! 530
See there! What is it?
FERNANDO. A ribbon tied
To the gate.
RODRIGO. No doubt the souls of those
Who foolishly declared their love
For her are fixed here as their punishment.
FERNANDO. I think it a favour from Leonor. 535
We often meet here.
RODRIGO. My lack of faith
Persuades me it is not Inés;
And yet the possibility
Remains that those ungrateful hands
Have placed it there. Give me the ribbon. 540
FERNANDO. Impossible. If it belongs
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To Leonor, I am obliged to wear it.
If I do not, she will believe
I do not care for her.
RODRIGO. A suggestion, then.
FERNANDO. Which is?
RODRIGO. We shall divide it.
FERNANDO. To what 545
Effect?
RODRIGO. If both of us are seen
Displaying it, the women will
Believe we came together.
FERNANDO. Listen!
There's someone in the street!
Enter DON ALONSOand TELLO, in dark clothing.
TELLO. The gate,
Sir, quickly. Fabia's waiting. We have 550
Important business to attend to.
ALONSO. You have business tonight with Fabia?
TELLO. An elevated matter.
ALONSO. Really?
TELLO. Hence the ladder, sir.
ALONSO. And Fabia?
TELLO. A pair of pincers.
ALONSO. But what do you intend 555
To do?
TELLO. Extract a little lady from
Her dwelling.
ALONSO. Be careful, Tello. Don't get
Involved in anything from which
There's no escape.
TELLO. It's nothing, sir.
ALONSO. You think a lady nothing?
TELLO. It's just 560
A tooth, from a highwayman they strung
Up yesterday.
ALONSO. Look there. Two men
Are standing at the gate.
TELLO. Maybe they're
On guard.
ALONSO. So how am I to get
The ribbon?
TELLO. She may be teaching you 565
A lesson, sir.
ALONSO. If I was over-bold,
She'd surely find some other way.
In any case, she is mistaken.
Little does she know Alonso, praised
For his courage as the Knight of Olmedo. 570
I'll teach her to find some other way
To punish those who serve her!
TELLO. Don't
Do anything stupid!
ALONSO. Gentlemen! No one's
Allowed to wait outside the gate!
RODRIGO. Who's that?
FERNANDO. Can't say I recognize 575
His person or his voice.
RODRIGO. Who is
It dares to speak with such effrontery?
ALONSO. Someone, my friend, whose sword will do
His talking for him.
RODRIGO. Then he shall find
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Someone who'll punish him for arrogance. 580
TELLO. Go to it, master. Much better than
Extracting teeth from corpses!
[ RODRIGOand FERNANDOwithdraw
ALONSO. Let
Them go!
TELLO. Look! Someone's left his cloak
Behind!
ALONSO. Let's take it over there.
The windows give more light.* 585
