She looked up at the ceiling, quietly searching for a way to tell Sasha she needed some space, without revealing why. She blew out a long breath. “The thing is…” She stopped herself right away, not at all sure how to say it. She gave up. “Nothing. Forget it,” she finished.
“What?” Sasha demanded.
Meg looked past her. “Nothing.”
Sasha touched one finger to Meg’s cheek, guiding her attention back. “Tell me,” she said softly.
Meg’s attention was fixed on Sasha’s hand, still on her face, and she widened her eyes at the overly familiar gesture, but let it go when Sasha dropped her hand quickly.
“It’s nothing, really.” Meg leaned her head against the wall behind her. “It’s just, I don’t know. I love hanging out with you and your friends.” She chewed the inside of her mouth. “Sometimes I just feel like—”
Sasha finished for her. “What, like they’re judging you or something?”
“No. That’s not it at all.” Meg barked out her response because it couldn’t be further from the truth. Sasha’s friends were sweet and totally accepting of Meg’s life. She licked her lips. “I just think maybe I should be spending more time with my people.”
Sasha looked confused. “Your friends, you mean?”
“No.” Meg swallowed. “I guess, yes. But that’s not what I meant.”
“Wait.” Sasha held up one hand. “Do you mean…lesbians?”
“Not for, like, solidarity,” Meg responded in defense of her statement. “I just think I should be going out to places where I might actually meet someone. You know?”
Sasha took a second to let it sink in. “Oh.” She looked into her drink, considering. “We could do that, if you want.” Sasha averted her eyes and sounded a little disappointed. “Go to the Kitchen, or wherever, after.” She touched the rim of her glass with her forefinger. “I’m sure Jane-Anne and the rest would come.”
“That’s all right.” Meg’s tone was more dismissive than she intended.
Sasha looked right at Meg. “Even if they didn’t, Meg, I would go with you.”
They were talking close and had to lean in to hear each other over the crowd and the jukebox. Over Sasha’s shoulder, Meg saw Scott sizing them up. She knew she didn’t have much time left. She leaned in to speak, to give Sasha a halfhearted explanation of why that wasn’t necessary, but it was too late. Scott was there.
“Watch out, Sasha. You’re getting pretty close there. You don’t want Meg to get the wrong idea.”
Scott was the only one who laughed. Meg and Sasha held eye contact for a beat but left their conversation unfinished.
In a second, Carrie and Sue from HR joined the group and Scott was quick to steal the limelight by taking out his gigantic phone and pulling up a new video that had just gone viral. The group chatted together for a while until they naturally splintered and Meg took the schism as an opportunity to slip out unnoticed. As she reached for her jacket, she did a cursory scan for Sasha until she located her still next to Scott, laughing away at one of his stupid jokes. Meg dashed out the door and began flagging down cab after cab that passed her by, already loaded with passengers.
Meg heard Sasha’s accusation before she even realized Sasha was behind her. “You’re leaving?”
“Sorry. I’m just not into it tonight.”
“So you just sneak out without saying good-bye?” Sasha reached for Meg’s arm and pulled it down, clearly expecting an explanation.
“Why are you so mad at me tonight?”
“I’m not mad. I just don’t understand why you would leave like that.”
Meg looked over at the bar’s façade. “You had your hands full with Scott anyway.” She wasn’t sure why she’d started down this path, but it was too late, so she pressed on. “As usual.”
Sasha folded her arms across her chest against the chilly night air. “Come on, Meg, there’s nothing going on between me and Scott. You know that.”
“Fine. Whatever.” Meg frowned. “It’s none of my business anyway.”
“Then stay. Please?” she asked. “Or let me come with you,” she added, reaching over and tugging hopefully at Meg’s jacket.
It was yet another gesture Meg found too intimate for the parameters of their friendship. She didn’t know what to say, but it didn’t matter. At that moment a taxi flew down the street with its overhead light on, indicating it was unoccupied. Meg shot her arm up just in time. Reaching for the door handle she called over her shoulder, “I’m sorry, Sash. I gotta go.”
Meg looked at the driver through the partition and gave him the cross streets for the Kitchen. She didn’t really know what she was doing, she just knew she didn’t want to go home. She spent the short cab ride overanalyzing Sasha’s every move of the night—a waste of time, she knew, but she couldn’t help herself. Of course her ride would have been better spent contacting any of her friends, even Taylor Higgins, to see if anyone was hanging out somewhere or wanted to meet her at the Kitchen. Instead she arrived at the bar alone and entered it that way, praying she might find a familiar face inside.
She ordered a drink right away and within two minutes spotted her exes Mia and Becca in the back corner, proving once and for all the Lord above had a warped sense of humor. They were the last people on earth she wanted to run into, given her mood and the pathetic truth that she’d come out alone. She could feel their eyes on her and took a hefty swig from her drink, hoping the alcohol would numb their pity. She gave a chin nod in their direction and was thinking about going over just to be social, when she caught sight of Sasha standing inside the front door, looking anxious as she scanned the crowd. Sasha’s eyes found hers and locked with them as she made her way over, maneuvering around several women between them. She stood directly in front of Meg and, without saying a word, she leaned in and softly pressed her lips to Meg’s.
When Sasha pulled back slowly, she looked right at Meg. “Come with me.” It was at once a command and a plea, and Meg didn’t protest. She placed her drink at the edge of the bar and let Sasha guide her through the crowd.
They grabbed a taxi in front of the bar. Sasha leaned forward to the driver to give him her address, never letting go of Meg’s hand. They sat together with their fingers interlaced, not saying a word the entire twelve-minute cab ride until they were deposited outside Sasha’s gray apartment building.
Sasha finally released Meg’s grip as she dug the keys out of her purse to open up the vestibule door. Meg followed quietly as they walked up three flights of stairs, still in silence, until they reached Sasha’s apartment and she quickly turned two locks and pushed the heavy door open. Meg took only one step inside before Sasha closed the door, locking the locks systematically, while Meg leaned up against the wall and waited for whatever was about to happen.
Sasha stood in front of her, speechless. For a second Meg thought she was going to say something, but then she didn’t. She looked from Meg’s mouth to her eyes and back to her mouth again. She licked her own lips and leaned forward. Meg kissed her back, softly at first, but their kiss intensified quickly. Meg tried to hold back—she really had no idea how far this would go, and the last thing she wanted to do was move too fast too soon. But she could feel herself throbbing already and she had to make a concerted effort to keep her hands still. She strategically placed them high on the sides of Sasha’s neck, cradling her face, but after a few minutes she got caught up in the moment. Without thinking she let them slide down the front of Sasha’s body and inside her peacoat, finding her hips and pulling her closer. After a second, Sasha stepped back, and immediately Meg worried she had gone too far.
Sasha looked down sheepishly. “Sorry.” Her lips were bright red and her cheeks were flushed. “We can probably take these off.” Her laugh was nervous as she hung her coat on the corner rack and removed her boots, placing them below it. Meg didn’t dare move.
“You’re not going to leave, are you?” Sasha sounded scared she might say yes. Meg found it adorable and vulner
able and sexy as hell, and even though she had no clue what the fuck was happening, she found a calm voice and responded.
“Of course not.”
Meg slipped out of her jacket and handed it to Sasha. She visually scanned the studio apartment for a place to sit but found basically one piece of furniture—a bed—in the center of the small room.
“Sash, I—” Meg started to speak, unsure what to say, but she stopped talking when Sasha took her hand again and guided them toward the bed.
“Do you want a drink or anything?” Sasha asked. Without the heel of her boots, Sasha was a full two inches shorter than Meg, and when she looked up, her eyes were as serious as ever.
“No.” Meg shook her head. She sat down on the bed and waited for a second, but Sasha didn’t join her. Again Meg wondered if it was over, thinking maybe Sasha would get herself a drink and they would talk, or something. But that didn’t happen either. Instead, Sasha stood in front of Meg for a long moment before she took her shirt off and dropped it to the floor next to her.
Instinctively, Meg leaned in and kissed the soft, flat belly inches from her face. She let her hands find their way up Sasha’s skirt, along Sasha’s smooth thighs. Sasha reached behind her back, undid her skirt, and let it fall to the floor, placing one knee on each side of Meg as she straddled her on top of the mattress.
They kissed each other deeply and were so in sync that their movements were virtually seamless as Sasha reached down and pulled Meg’s shirt off while Meg unhooked Sasha’s bra. Sliding the straps down Sasha’s arms, Meg leaned forward and pressed her lips to Sasha’s chest first, then moved down over the curve of her breasts until her lips found Sasha’s nipple and she brushed across it gently. Sasha leaned back a little, digging her hands into Meg’s hair as she pushed herself deeper into Meg’s mouth. Reading Sasha’s reaction, Meg stayed focused for a good minute before kissing her way to Sasha’s other breast, where she remained until Sasha couldn’t take it anymore, pulling Meg’s face up toward her own and kissing her with wild abandon.
Meg kept her composure, grazing her hands up and down Sasha’s back, through her long, soft hair, until one hand rested at Sasha’s neck, the other on the curve of her hip. She leaned backward onto the bed and brought Sasha with her, still kissing her as she rolled over on top. Sasha fidgeted with Meg’s bra clasp, but gave up right away and pulled it off over her head roughly before she slid her hands into the back of Meg’s jeans, inside her underwear, trying unsuccessfully to push them down together. Meg sat up on her knees and reached for her belt but Sasha took over, gently moving Meg’s hand away as she undid the buckle and lowered the zipper of Meg’s jeans, inching her pants down. Meg leaned in, kissing Sasha back down to the mattress, while she wriggled out of her jeans and kicked them to the floor. Their hands were all over each other, and despite her efforts at restraint, Meg realized she was already grinding pretty hard between Sasha’s legs.
She took it a step further, kissing her way down Sasha’s body, only stopping when her face was even with Sasha’s underwear, the last barrier between them. Meg looked up and made eye contact to ask Sasha the question she’d been afraid to utter since they entered the apartment.
“Sasha, are you sure?”
It was probably strange to ask such a thing at this point. Meg knew Sasha wasn’t drunk. They were both fully aware of what they were doing, but Meg also knew they were about to cross a line and she wanted to make it clear, even though Sasha had instigated pretty much everything, there was still no pressure for her to do anything she wasn’t ready for.
Her eyes on Meg’s, Sasha bit her lower lip and nodded.
It was one of the sexiest things Meg had ever seen and it gave her the assurance she needed. She carefully removed Sasha’s black panties and got to work.
They found a rhythm right away and Sasha seemed into it and relaxed as she moved her hips in unison with Meg. But then she stopped Meg abruptly, tugging at her short hair and pulling her upward. Meg was disappointed, but not shocked, figuring Sasha was having second thoughts after all. She moved herself up Sasha’s body and began to mentally prepare to talk it out.
Sasha surprised Meg again by kissing her hard and taking Meg’s hand as she directed it between her legs. “In,” she whispered, guiding Meg’s fingers with her own at first. “Is that okay?” Sasha asked, as she wrapped her arms around Meg’s shoulders.
Meg felt no need to answer, concentrating instead on getting her body weight behind her as she pushed into Sasha. She felt Sasha’s legs tighten around her waist, forcing her in deeper with each movement. Meg heard Sasha’s breathing change and she started to moan—louder than Meg expected—until she dug her fingers into Meg’s back and breathed out, “Fuck, Megan,” as she came.
*
Meg lay on her back looking up at the ceiling for a good few minutes, the silence hanging heavy between them. Sasha had barely moved since her orgasm and Meg wondered if she was pretending to be asleep. She’d faced this before—one-sided sex with a straight girl—and she certainly understood it might be the case here, as well.
Almost on cue, Sasha turned on her side to face Meg and gently placed her hand on Meg’s stomach. She leaned over and kissed Meg sweetly on the lips, then the cheek, until she began working her way down Meg’s neck. In a voice that was a bit huskier than usual, Sasha spoke. “So, I don’t really know what I’m doing,” she began.
“You don’t have to do anything,” Meg responded, giving her an out.
Sasha’s mouth curled up on one side. “I didn’t say that.” She kissed Meg’s collarbone. “I was just hoping for a little learning curve.” She moved her lips across Meg’s chest and let her hand drift down Meg’s body. She gasped audibly and looked down when her fingers slid easily into Meg, who was very ready. “Is that because of me?” she asked.
Meg nodded slightly, a little embarrassed by how wet she knew she was.
“Oh my God, that’s hot,” Sasha added, not bothering to filter. Once again she bit her lower lip and slowly began to make her way down Meg’s body. Meg was already breathing heavily, both excited for what seemed imminent and worried Sasha might balk. She didn’t.
Instead, Sasha took her time, kissing Meg’s sides and her belly until she finally put her mouth where Meg needed it most. She moved her tongue slowly up and down at first, not appearing uncomfortable in the slightest. When she looked up, possibly for reassurance, Meg wasn’t sure, their eyes locked. It was all Meg could do to resist coming from the intensity of the moment. She held out, but not for very long. When Sasha increased the pace, moving the flat of her tongue against her clit, Meg’s hips bucked furiously beyond her control and she climaxed in what was probably record time.
When they had both finished, they settled into each other with Sasha curling into Meg’s body, nuzzling her head into the space between Meg’s chin and shoulder. She tilted Meg’s head toward hers and gave her a nice kiss on the lips. “That was fucking incredible,” she said, placing her head back on Meg’s bare chest.
Meg couldn’t have agreed more.
Chapter Fifteen
Meg woke up in the center of the bed, a mass of covers crumpled around her. The light streaming in from the windows was bright—brighter than morning sun. She tilted her head to the side but couldn’t seem to locate a clock. Sasha wasn’t next to her but as Meg rubbed the sleep from her eyes she saw her standing less than five feet away leaning on the kitchen counter. Sasha had on the tortoiseshell glasses they had picked out together and a heather-gray oversized tee that just brushed the tops of her thighs. She was scarfing down Honey Nut Cheerios as though it might be her last meal.
“Hey,” Meg said, lifting herself onto her elbows.
Sasha waved with her spoon and Meg thought, she hoped at least, she saw a smile playing at the corners of her mouth as she chewed. With a small movement she pushed off the counter and crossed to Meg, sitting on the edge of the bed with one leg pulled up under her.
“Morning,” she said as she swallowed.
Meg moved herself up farther into a sitting position against the pillows. She wasn’t sure at all what to say or what to expect. The full weight of the prior evening’s events hadn’t really hit her yet and she had no idea what Sasha’s reaction would be but thought she should say something.
“Are you, um, okay?” Meg moved her hands back and forth between them. “With everything?”
“Mm-hmm.” Sasha nodded.
“Sash, you know it’s okay if you aren’t. We could talk about it.”
“I’m fine.” Sasha’s smile was a little bashful. “I’m just starving.”
“Me too,” Meg echoed.
“Here.” Sasha spooned some cereal into Meg’s mouth, wiping a line of milk that dripped down Meg’s chin with her thumb.
Meg leaned her head back into the pillow as she chewed. “God, that’s good.”
“I know, right?” Sasha helped herself to another bite, before hooking Meg up again.
Meg held on to Sasha’s hand for a second, forcing eye contact. “Sash.”
Sasha raised her eyes, her dark lashes lifting as she waited for Meg to continue.
“You sure you’re okay?”
The spoon clanked against the sides of the bowl as Sasha placed it on the nightstand next to the bed. She put a hand on each side of Meg’s face and kissed her long and slow. She pulled away deliberately. “I’m okay. I promise.” She leaned forward again but stopped herself. “Wait, are you okay?”
“Yeah,” Meg breathed out. “Of course.”
“Okay.” Sasha smiled.
“Would you just hand me my shirt?” Meg asked, nodding toward its location on the floor.
Without even looking, Sasha shook her head. “Absolutely not,” she answered, removing her specs and lifting off her own shirt as she slipped back under the covers.
*
Meg re-woke up in the middle of the afternoon, Sasha’s naked body still pressed against hers. She kissed her temple softly and Sasha cuddled into her sweetly before opening her eyes.
Serious Potential Page 14
