“Just look at how beautiful this day is!” Rose stopped in the driveway next to Joseph’s car. She spread her arms and raised her face to the sky.
“It’s perfect,” Joseph said. “I sure hope this weather holds out for the wedding.”
Rose beamed at him. “It will. I just know it will.”
She got into his car and Joseph swung the rear door open for Nikki. Henry watched as her eyes met his but she gave nothing away. Nikki played along, acting as if Joseph was just as he appeared in that moment. She even offered him a smile before sliding into the back seat.
Joseph held the door for Henry too, their eyes meeting. “Sure, let’s go to the beach. You like being around the water, right?” He nodded toward the car. “Does that remind you of anything?”
Henry looked into the car and it took everything he had not to rear back. His pulse escalating at the sight of it full of water, as if submerged beneath a murky river even while sunlight beamed across its roof. Captured in that space, Nikki’s bent body floated limp, her hair rising in tendrils to the ceiling, lifeless eyes staring from a face suddenly gone bloodless. It’s just an illusion, he told himself. I don’t know how he’s doing it but that’s all it is.
“Come on, guys! Let’s get going.” Rose’s voice came to him muffled, as if from some distant place.
Then he heard Nikki. “Everything okay?”
“Go on, get in,” Joseph said, his voice close to Henry’s ear. “You’re not scared of a little water, are you?”
Henry remained transfixed by the nightmare image he knew couldn’t be real. He wanted to tell Joseph he wasn’t afraid but, instead, stared in horror at Nikki’s dead eyes as she now floated up, her body bumping to a stop as it hit the ceiling. A bubble of air escaped her lips.
“Those that sent you,” Joseph whispered, “they’re scared. Our kind has been here since the beginning of time and we’re not going anywhere. Believe me, this is where you’re staying.”
Nikki reached from the car and seized Henry’s wrist. The illusion vanished and he saw Nikki now, her worried eyes looking up at him. “Henry? I’m right here.”
Rose turned in the front seat. “That’s really sweet, Nikki.”
Nikki kept her eyes on Henry’s. “It’s just something we say. So we don’t forget how much we mean to each other. Right, Henry?”
“I’ll be right here too,” Joseph whispered. “And I’m not alone.”
~~~
Henry kept looking over at Nikki as Joseph drove, her expression silently communicating that she understood. Or, at least that she understood enough. In coming here, they’d entered into more than just Rose’s delusion. That dream itself had thick enough walls. But what had managed to secure those walls for this many decades had way more power. These entities surrounding Rose—these parasites—were conniving and sick. They fed off pain and seemed somehow capable of prolonging it indefinitely even as the sufferer remained anesthetized. This was no joke, what they’d volunteered for, and they simply had no way of predicting what might happen next.
Henry wished they could talk openly and part of him wondered why they didn’t do just that. Why shouldn’t they abandon the pretense? Why should either he or Nikki care about the consequences of telling Rose who they were and where she actually was? Couldn’t that possibly make her snap out of it and return with them?
As if reading his mind, Nikki locked her eyes on his. She shook her head almost imperceptibly. We have to wait, her eyes said and Henry understood. She was right. They had to be patient. Whatever chance they had of shattering the illusion was slim enough. Attempting it with Joseph here would only weaken their chances that much more. The best they could hope for, until the right time, was to do their best to keep making the dream erode.
For now, Henry did the only thing he could. He told himself again that nothing around them was real. None of it. Not the car they rode in. Not Rose, not as she was now. Not Joseph, obviously. Not the sky above or the trees passing by in a blur at the side of the road. Only Nikki was real. Just Nikki.
They parked alongside a few other cars in the beach parking lot. The lot was small, designed just for those privileged with access to this part of the coast. Rose had known a life where exclusivity was the norm, with neighborhoods inhabited only by the wealthy, closed off from the rest of the world. This beach must be one she remembered as being one of her favorite places—obscured from the road by grassy dunes with discreet paths leading past them to the sand and water.
Still, despite having known a privileged life, Rose didn’t seem in any way snobbish or unkind. If, in her afterlife, she reflected the person she’d been, Henry imagined she must have been a truly nice person. Maybe the pain she’d suffered had brought out the best in her since she appeared to be continually seeking happiness. Even now, she ran across the sand carrying a rolled up blanket and a picnic basket, not once questioning where it had come from or that it was weighted with sandwiches and drinks they hadn’t stopped to buy. The gaps in her experience filled themselves as needed, and it didn’t matter that those gaps were obvious to those around her, regardless of their intentions. After all, this was her dream.
Rose spread the blanket and waited, hands on her hips. She smiled back at them. “Come on, slowpokes! How long can it possibly take to cross a beach?”
“You look gorgeous today,” Joseph said, walking toward her. “Did you know that?”
Rose laughed and plunked herself down on the blanket, her eyes never leaving his. She didn’t notice the silent exchange between Henry and Nikki.
How could Joseph act so casually, as if Henry and Nikki didn’t know what he was? But that was just it, Henry realized. They didn’t know what he was, not truly. They only knew he wasn’t human, not in spirit, even though clearly he could take human form. Still, Rose gazed back at him, her eyes full of love and trust, reminding Henry why they were here.
He and Nikki joined them, sitting on the blanket across from them as Rose lifted items from her picnic basket. She passed bottles of Coke to Joseph, who used a bottle opener to pry off the caps before handing one to Nikki and Henry. She unwrapped deli sandwiches.
“Ooh, these look yummy.” Rose passed them around. “Greenfield’s make the best turkey sandwiches.”
Wherever Greenfield’s was, or had been, didn’t matter. For Rose, it remained forever in existence, people from another era still slicing meats and spreading mayonnaise across freshly baked bread. Henry accepted the sandwich, wondering if it would fall to ash in his mouth when he took a bite. That didn’t happen. Here in Rose’s dream, as in the realm he knew, food remained real. Part of Henry questioned his own reality in a way he hadn’t since first Transitioning. Since then, he’d come to accept things as being as they were for now, not so different in many ways from the life he’d once known. And he shared that experience with his friends, who all accepted the same reality. In a way, though, he wondered if by trying to puncture Rose’s reality he’d created a small crack in his own.
Joseph kept his eyes on the water as he ate his sandwich. After a few moments, he said, “It’s always so beautiful here.” He looked over at Rose. “Isn’t it, honey? I can’t imagine ever leaving.”
Rose pulled her hair back and gazed out at the water. Henry wondered as she hesitated, but then she said, “This is our home. It always will be.”
Joseph turned his attention Nikki. “So, what about you and Henry? What made you two decide to live here of all the places in the world?”
Joseph offered a smile that, to Rose, probably looked innocent enough. But to Henry, it was a gleaming grin suggesting he was having fun at her expense.
Nikki considered for only a moment while she chewed a bite of her sandwich. She took a sip of Coke, meeting Joseph’s eyes with confidence saying that she got it and she could play this game. She turned to Rose. “Henry’s family. They’re nearby. We thought it would be nice to live near them.”
“I knew it had to be family!” Rose hunched forward, her eyes gleam
ing with excitement. “That’s really nice. I think my grandmother said something about knowing your grandparents.” Rose thought for a moment as she added more to her fantasy. “Yes, I’m sure she said something about that the other day. Didn’t your grandfather have something to do with movies?”
Joseph looked back and forth between them, waiting, that smile never leaving his face.
Henry nodded, chewing, trying to come up with something. “Nothing very exciting,” he said. “More just the business part of it. Financial stuff.”
Rose nodded knowingly. “Well, I’m sure having been a movie producer must have been very exciting.”
“What about you, Nikki?” Joseph said. “Do you have family around here too?”
Henry noticed that this time Nikki couldn’t bring herself to meet his eyes. “Not very close by.”
Joseph offered a pleasant smile contradicting the coldness in his eyes. “When was the last time you saw them? Maybe recently?”
Again, Nikki hesitated and Henry felt his pulse quicken as he stared at Joseph’s grinning profile. Joseph kept staring at Nikki, who’d now dropped her gaze to study the nap of the blanket.
Nikki shook her head. “It’s been a little while.”
“I bet you have a sister,” Joseph said. “Call it a hunch. Do you miss not seeing her?”
Rose put her sandwich down on its wrapper. “Honey, I think you’re asking too many questions. Why don’t we just—”
Nikki got to her feet. “Excuse me. I thought I just saw something wash up over there.” She looked back at Rose, then Henry, avoiding eye contact with Joseph. “I have this little habit of collecting sea glass. I’ll be right back.”
Henry wanted to do three things at the same time. He wanted to run after Nikki. He wanted to smack that grin off Joseph’s face. He wanted to protect Rose from the very thing that would save her—the shattering of her dream and all the comfort she’d managed to wrap around herself. The last thing he wanted to do was cause her pain but he also knew he had no choice.
“It’s okay to ask questions,” Henry said. “I mean, that’s how people get to know each other.” He turned to Joseph. “I know you didn’t mean any harm but Nikki has a couple of issues she has to work out with her family. Nothing major. I’m sure it will all be okay very soon.” He waited a minute, then turned to Rose. “So, when did you guys get engaged?”
Rose opened her mouth to speak but nothing came. She lifted her eyes as if considering.
“Last November,” Joseph said.
Henry continued to face Rose. “Wow, not long ago. How many months is that?”
Rose cocked her head. Again, she searched for an answer but Joseph didn’t give her time.
“Seven months,” he said.
It had just been a hunch, but Henry knew firsthand how in a timeless world you stopped thinking in terms of dates and months. All of it started to blend together since those markers no longer mattered.
“For us, it felt like just a few days from when we decided to get married to the actual wedding,” Henry said. “The time went by really fast. And it felt like we had to invite everyone we’d ever known so no one’s feelings got hurt.” Henry laughed. “Nikki’s mother invited a ton of people I’d never even met. They were totally sizing me up the whole day, I could tell.”
Henry watched as Rose’s expression clouded over. How long had it been, he wondered, since she’d experienced a day talking to her grandmother or Joseph’s mother about who should be invited? Or had certain steps been forgotten entirely in Rose’s dream, her actual wedding plans made almost seventy years ago?
Rose glanced to where Nikki still pretended to be inspecting shells at the water’s edge. It seemed like Rose was thinking about joining her.
“We’re managing just fine,” Joseph said. “We have the whole deal figured out. Right, honey?”
Rose spun back to face him, gathering her hair against the breeze that had suddenly picked up. “I’m sorry. I was thinking about something.”
“I was just telling Henry we’ve got things all buttoned up.” Joseph kept his eyes on hers. “Nothing left now but making sure we have a special day together. Right, babe?”
Rose offered him a smile but it seemed forced. “That’s right.” She took a deep breath and brightened her smile for Henry. “So, how did you and Nikki meet? I bet it was someplace interesting like college. Or maybe you were travelling and met her in Paris or someplace beautiful like that.”
There it was again, Rose’s trait for imagining the best of circumstances. Somehow, she’d remained a happy person. Or maybe she’d countered her sadness by creating beauty within herself. Henry fought the urge from before. He knew he didn’t have a choice but to keep trying to make Rose face the pain that would end her imprisonment.
“We actually did meet at school,” Henry said. “Good guess.”
“I knew it!” Rose beamed with happiness again.
Joseph wrapped his arm around her. “Well, you also said Paris.”
“But I said school first.”
Joseph nodded. “True. I’ll give you that.”
“But it wasn’t exactly a straight line,” Henry said. “Things were kind of bumpy at first.”
Rose leaned in toward him. “What do you mean?”
Henry hesitated. “Well, at first I was dating Nikki’s best friend. I still feel kind of guilty about that.”
Rose drew back a little, waiting for him to continue.
“Karen was nice,” Henry said. “For a while, I even wondered if we might get serious. And it wasn’t like I meant for things to change. Then I met Nikki and stuff just sort of happened.” Henry kept his eyes on Rose even as he felt Joseph’s gaze burning into him. “Was Joseph ever attracted to one of your friends? I mean, that kind of thing happens a lot. People get drawn to each other for all kinds of reasons.”
Suddenly, Rose jumped up. She stared at Henry, then Joseph, her head swiveling back and forth a few times before she started walking.
Nikki was just now crossing the beach in their direction. She called out to Rose. “Are you taking a walk? Do you want company?”
If Rose heard her, she gave no sign of it. She kept walking a path parallel to the water, her heels kicking sand with each stride.
Joseph turned to Henry. “Nice try but I know her.”
Henry stared into his hateful eyes, trying to ignore the smile growing on Joseph’s lips. “You’re going to lose,” he said.
Joseph laughed. “Think so? Because, if I know Rose, she’ll be pushing you out of her thoughts in three…two…one—”
Darkness fell immediately, a much deeper darkness than the night before—an impenetrably thick void, leaving Henry blind.
If he remained sitting on a beach, he had no way of knowing.
If Joseph still sat next to him, Henry couldn’t say.
Nikki had been walking toward them moments ago and she’d vanished along with Rose.
Henry jumped to his feet, stumbling, not sure where to go or which direction to turn. “Nikki!”
“That’s right, call out for your girlfriend.”
Henry didn’t recognize the voice that just whispered in his ear. It had to be Joseph, or whatever Joseph reverted back to in the darkness. This was his true world, after all, this place without light.
Henry called out again, so Nikki could find him too.
“Henry?” Her voice sounded far off. Henry wondered if she’d gotten confused and run down the beach. But were they even on a beach anymore? Hadn’t the beach just been another part of Rose’s dream?
Henry waited to hear that other voice hiss at him again but for some reason Joseph—or whatever Joseph really was—had moved away. Or he stood nearby watching. Henry had no way of knowing. He ran too, trying not to lose his footing or stumble again. A few times he thought he saw shapes in the void but he wasn’t sure. It could have been his imagination.
“Henry, where are you!” Nikki sounded a mile off now and Henry wasn’t sure he was even
running toward her.
Then he saw a light, faint and distant, flickering. He pushed on, hoping it was the same light that had beckoned the night before, that he’d find his way back to the house.
It seemed like forever as he continued to run, his heart pounding and his breath coming in gasps. But the light was definitely drawing nearer. Flickering less. Henry saw it clearly now, fog swirling past it. That’s what was causing it to wink on and off, he realized.
He strained his ears but didn’t hear Nikki anymore. There was just him and the darkness and that one light. At least it was still in sight and Henry knew it wasn’t far now. He’d be there in a minute.
Suddenly, the sound of his footsteps changed, no longer thudding against earth but instead pounding on what sounded like wood. Henry slowed to a walk, unsure now where that light in front of him led to. He didn’t remember this sound from last night. He hadn’t experienced walking on anything that creaked like the wood beneath him did now. It felt as if the wood gave slightly at his steps. Still, he kept walking, the light close. It seemed like no more than twenty feet away.
A breeze came out of nowhere and the fog swirled away from the light. Henry looked down, able to see his own feet for the first time in the glow. He saw planks of wood. He stopped and listened, thinking at first it was the wind rushing past his ears. Then he realized—the sound was water. Henry knew that sound well, the rolling flow of a river. He tried to fight off the panic rising inside him as his heart pounded even more. He’d been around rivers since he drowned but only a few times, and in daylight, knowing in those times he was perfectly safe. That nothing could happen to him, despite the fear that had fought to win over his emotions. Now, it was all he could do to not give in to the icy terror nearly paralyzing him.
Henry squinted through the darkness at the churning water, the flow breaking white as it rushed over boulders glistening in the night. This wasn’t just a river. These were rapids, the river swollen and roiling. He took another tentative step and wood creaked beneath his feet. He was walking on a pier, he realized, one stretching out toward that torrent. The light twisted in the breeze, as if suspended on a chain or hook. So close but that meant something entirely different now. That light marked the end of the pier.
Stepping into the Sky: Jump When Ready, Book 3 Page 9