by Isobel Lucas
“I’ve known you less than twenty-four hours. Why are we discussing this?” My heart pounded. Was it because he was everything I’d been hoping for? Or because he was telling me what I wanted to hear? What high school guy talked that, anyway?
Ian picked up my hand and kissed my palm. “I want you to know me. I think you’re special. I was hoping you’d think I’m special too.”
It was too much. It was everything I wanted to hear, but somehow I couldn’t believe what was right in front of me. Triniti told me he’d do this. She told me he sweet-talked girls into wanting him, and then he took advantage.
“I have to go, Ian.” I zipped up my coat. Grabbing the door handle, I turned back to him one more time. “This is too fast. If you really like me, then give me time, okay? Maybe we can go to a movie or out to eat. No making out, just getting to know each other.”
His eyes clouded over. This was it. He’d lose interest in me faster than a dog distracted by a squirrel.
“I’ve never felt this way before. There isn’t much time, Raven, but I’ll give you whatever space you need.”
“Time? Time for what?” Was he referring to graduation? It was still almost a year off.
“No, the end of the world. Satan’s coming back and he’s not going to be alone.”
Now I knew he was nuts. Or just totally desperate to get in my pants. Did girls really fall for end-of-the-world lines? “What the hell are you talking about? Are you one of those wackos who thinks the world is going to end before Christmas?”
He ran a hand over his short, blond hair. “I shouldn’t have said that.”
“No, you shouldn’t. It’s creepy.” Fleeing the car was the best idea, but there was still something pulling me to him. Clearly I needed to see a shrink.
He grabbed my hand. “There’s something I have to tell you.” I waited. He took a deep breath and swallowed. “I’m the son of God.”
“Jesus,” I said, not believing what I was hearing.
“No. Jesus is kind of like my older brother. Don’t bring him up. Anyway, I was sent to earth to stop the demon that’s supposed to start the fall of humanity. I thought you were it, but then when I kissed you last night I realized you had a soul. You aren’t the one I’m looking for.”
I tried to pull my hand out of his, but his grip was too tight.
“It was that moment when I knew you were the one I’d give everything up for. I’m made from intense, heavenly love. My soul is prepared to love everyone in the world. It’s the best way for me to stay focused on my task when I’d rather just chill out, playing video games. Yet when I kissed you Raven, when I felt your body against mine, I knew I’d give it all up for a short, human lifetime with you. I care more about you than anything else in this world.”
I sat still, stunned. They’d never taught me about this in Catholic school.
“Do you understand?” he asked, his grip on my hand still strong.
I nodded. His eyes lit up as a smile crossed his face. “Good,” he said as he let go of my hand.
“You’re a fucking psycho.” I opened the door and jumped out of his car, slamming it behind me. I sprinted into the woods next to the parking lot. Branches hit my face, but I kept going, afraid he was out there behind me. Either he was trying too hard to convince me to sleep with him or he was certifiably insane. So much for a casual make out session with a hot guy.
There wasn’t any noise behind me. Even so, I didn’t stop running until I made it home and shut and locked the front door behind me.
“Mary! What on earth did you do to your hair?” My mother stood in her three-inch heels and power suit, clicking her toe against the marble floor.
Suddenly I wasn’t sure if it was worse listening to Ian spout religious nonsense or facing her wrath at my makeover.
Chapter Seven
“You haven’t answered me yet, young lady.”
Her toe continued tapping out my death march. It wasn’t often I defied my mother, and when I did it had to be worth it. I hadn’t even had time to think about whether or not I wanted to face her wrath before Triniti chopped off my hair.
“I, um, it was an accident.” I cursed inside my head. Not at my mother, but at the mousy little girl who appeared every time I tried to stand up to her.
“An accident? Your hair accidentally fell off? You accidentally walked into a pair of scissors?” She sighed, fingering the blunt edges by my chin. “Please tell me you at least saved it to donate to Locks of Love.”
Way to make me feel even worse. Thanks, Mom. “No, I didn’t. I wasn’t thinking.”
“You weren’t thinking? That’s not a shock.” She laid a hand on my shoulder, guiding me over to the island in the kitchen. I sat on one of the bar chairs and laid my hands on the table. It felt more like an interrogation room. Maybe she’d use the sink for waterboarding. “Is there something going on I should know about? Did the dirty boys in that band you’re in give you drugs?”
“What?! No! I’ve never done drugs, Mom. I swear.” Sweat trickled down the back of my neck as I thought of Ian’s glowing eyes and the feel of his fingertips on the hem of my underwear. My mom might think that was worse than drugs. “I just felt like a change and Triniti cut it for me.”
Mom rolled her eyes. Typical. She always yelled at me for rolling mine, but she did it just as often as I did. I learned it from her. I wasn’t allowed to call her on it. I’d just get in bigger trouble. “Triniti is a bad influence.”
“No she’s not, Mom. She’s fine.”
My mom sighed. Another of my bad habits I picked up from her.
“I wish your father’s company hadn’t forced him to take a pay cut. Only one more year of Catholic school and you would have been able to avoid the public school jungle.”
“Those animalistic public school kids go to college too, Mom. You can’t hide me from them forever.” It was an old argument, one I’d used all those years I rebelled against my plaid uniform, begging for something sparkly.
“I know, sweetie, I know. But your background would have been so solid. Now…”
“Now what? I went to Catholic school since kindergarten. If I don’t have that pure background by now, I never would have developed it.” Ian’s lips on my throat flashed into my mind. Sure a blush was creeping up my neck, I pushed back from the island. “I’ve gotta go do homework now. They expect us to work just as hard in public school as they did in Catholic.”
“One more thing, Mary,” she said behind me. I stopped, but didn’t turn around, hoping the collar of my shirt was hiding the evidence of what I’d been doing with Ian after school. “Your hair is cute. Next time, let’s have a professional cut it, okay? I love you.”
“Okay, Mom! Love you too.” I skittered out of the kitchen and ran up to my bedroom, my heart pounding a million miles a minute. I’d escaped totally unscathed for once. The stress from the drop in my dad’s income was more disturbing than an unapproved haircut. Mom wasn’t doing well either. Her real estate business had gone down the toilet since the market collapsed. What had been an easy life for us was suddenly one filled with uncertainty and worry.
Maybe that was why I’d let Ian take my hand and lead me out to his car after school. I missed my happy family. For a second, I thought I could be close to Ian, or at least lose myself in a few moments of wild abandon. That’s all I really wanted – was to forget everything in the arms of a totally hot guy. Six months ago, I wouldn’t have even thought it was possible. After last night’s performance, something changed inside me.
It wasn’t the fame or the You Tube video circulating (I’d managed to avoid checking every ten seconds to see how many hits my song had). It wasn’t the new haircut or the makeup. It wasn’t the hot groping fest in the dark hallway with Ian. The change happened inside while I was singing. I felt transformed, like I’d shed the girl I used to be and turned into something new, something different. A young woman, full of life, ready to take on the world. It was the girl I’d always tried to be. I never knew sh
e was hiding inside, just waiting for the right moment to emerge.
I stripped off my clothes and stood mostly naked in front of the full-length mirror in my bedroom. Was this the kind of body a boy would lust after? Ian had tried to convince me that it was, but then he spouted all that weirdo religious junk. And he told me he was a virgin? Weird shit. What boy ever admitted to that? It had to be a lie, one to make my pants fall off. Too bad for him it didn’t work.
I tossed my clothes in the hamper and slid into a pair of comfy yoga pants and an old Chicago Cubs t-shirt of my dad’s that I stole years ago. Settling on my window seat with my math textbook, I found myself staring out the window instead of at the equations in front of me.
The trees swayed back and forth in the breeze, their orange leaves dancing together like kids in a slow-motion mosh pit. My cell buzzed under my leg, but I ignored it. I was still puzzled about Ian. He seemed nice. He was into me. But what did he really know about me? Nothing, which told me he just wanted in my pants. And maybe I wanted that too. Maybe…
I grabbed my cell to see whose text I missed. It was Ian. How the hell did he get my number?
Get out of ur house!
What was wrong with him? Everything was an emergency. Probably some end of the world mess he thought he needed to clean up.
Change your mind about that whole celibacy thing? I texted back.
Get ur mind out of gutter! There’s a demon in your house.
Ian, stop. Not funny.
A blast downstairs sent smoke upward, choking me in my bedroom. Billowing black clouds and sulfurous scent enveloped my senses. “Mom,” I screamed. I ran to the door, grabbing the handle. Scorching heat radiated through my hand and I jerked back. “Stop. Drop. Roll,” I said to myself, repeating the old slogan I’d learned as a kid and never had to use. I dropped to the floor and crawled over to my window.
Flinging the sash up, I tasted the scent of fresh air mixing with the horrible smell of my burning house. My hands trembled on the bottom of the window. I couldn’t jump and there wasn’t a tree to climb down on. I looked back to my bedroom door. Smoke crept underneath like a sinister invader.
I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and jumped out of the window. I waited for the impact of bone against the concrete patio, but it didn’t come. My feet didn’t even touch the ground. A weird, tugging sensation came from my back. Cautiously I opened one eye and swiveled my head to the side.
Huge, lacey black wings flapped in the air, buoying me from the ground. “What in the name of all that’s holy?” I reached an unsteady hand behind me and touched the leathery wings protruding from my shoulder blades.
“Raven!” A voice called from below. I looked over, seeing Ian leaning up against a tree, his arms folded across his chest. “Want to talk a little more about heaven and hell?”
“No,” I shouted back. “Where the hell is my mom and what did you do to my house?”
Without thinking about it, I lowered to the ground, touching one toe to the cement first, just like Superman always did in the movies. The wings folded up and disappeared. I scratched at my back, but couldn’t even find a hole in the shirt.
Ignoring Ian, I swung around, watching my house burn as if it were a harmless bonfire, not an event that was about to change my life forever.
Chapter Eight
I sat on the ground next to an ambulance, a scratchy blanket wrapped around my shivering shoulders. The firefighters hadn’t found my mom inside. Not even a trace of her. We all hoped she’d run back to the office for something and forgot to tell me she was leaving. Until she answered her cell phone, we couldn’t be sure. My dad stood off to the side, talking animatedly to the cops. He’d gotten home from work only minutes ago, just after the emergency vehicles arrived and long after my wings disappeared.
Wings. I tried not to think about them. It was a hallucination brought on by stress. Obviously.
Ian sat on the ground next to me, his shoulder just barely touching mine. He hadn’t said a word since the fire truck arrived, for which I was grateful. The last thing I needed was more nonsense about demons.
His shoulder moved up, and I instinctively knew he was about to take a breath, which would lead to more talking.
“Don’t.” I preempted him. “Don’t say it again.”
“You’ve changed, Raven. Something’s different. You aren’t the same girl you were after school.”
Gee, my house was burning down and he was disappointed I wasn’t jumping his bones. Typical guy.
“Yesterday, I smelled you.”
He smelled me? Gross! What was that supposed to mean? For a hot guy he said all the wrong things. I couldn’t figure out how he’d gotten the player reputation. No girl would fall for this crap.
“You smelled of hell. Sulfur. Just like you’re smelling right now. You smell it, don’t you? It’s different than fire. More potent. More dangerous.”
I refused to tell him I’d smelled exactly that when the fire started. It was a coincidence. Or maybe a gas leak.
“And you think I smell like this?” I finally looked at him. His blue eyes were glowing again, trained directly on me as if he were on his guard against a dangerous animal. “Are you high again?”
“I don’t get high, Raven.” He sighed. “I’m the son of God. You can’t get much more of a natural high than that.”
Again with the insanity. He was so high.
“I’m on a mission, searching for the daughter of the devil. Yesterday in school, I thought you were it, but then last night after the concert when I was preparing to destroy you, I realized you had some kind of connection to God. I couldn’t do it. It was the same today after school. You emanated something so pure, so sweet. It took everything in me not to possess you fully in the car.”
“Possess me fully? What the hell is that supposed to mean? Is it your fancy way of saying you were ready to give up your virginity? And you’re telling me I remind you of the daughter of Satan. Thanks. That really turns me on.”
“How do you explain the wings?” He looked at me pointedly.
“The wings weren’t real. It was stress.”
“Stress caused you to sprout hellish wings? And you think I’m nuts.” He nudged my shoulder playfully.
Then I realized the truth. He’d seen the wings too. It wasn’t just me. My stomach dropped to my toes, and then sped up faster than an out-of-control elevator. I reached for the vomit bag the EMTs had given me and promptly lost my lunch.
Ian rubbed my back with one hand and held my hair back from my forehead with the other. It was kind of sweet, even though he was certifiable.
“I’m not the daughter of Satan. I’ve spent my entire life in Catholic school. I received the sacraments. I dipped my hand in holy water a zillion times. I went to confession. Wouldn’t I have burnt up by now?” I wiped my mouth on the blanket and took a sip of water from a bottle on the ground next to me.
Ian shrugged. “Maybe you’re just a normal demon and not the daughter of Satan, but you’re marked by the devil. It’s in your scent.”
“Well, any scent I have is covered up by puke now.”
He laughed. “It’s not that simple. What’s strange is that sometimes I can smell it on you and sometimes I can’t. You’re doing something to block it. But only occasionally. Like I said before, you’re an enigma.”
“Ask your dad. Maybe he can fill you in.” I couldn’t believe I was playing along with his stupid fantasies. It had to be the smoke inhalation. Maybe I needed oxygen if I was starting to believe Ian.
Ian shook his head. “God has more important things to do than this. He tasked me with finding Satan’s daughter. If I fail, the world loses.”
“What’s more important than that?” I asked, confused.
“We can’t stop the end of the world, according to scripture.”
“Then why bother?” Years of religious education flooded back. People were always convinced the world was about to end. Some said this December was it because of the Mayan c
alendar.
“We can’t sit back and do nothing. If there’s even the smallest chance I can slay the demon before she ignites Armageddon, then I have to try.”
“You want to slay me?” I asked. “Just a couple hours ago you wanted to do something a little different to me. I’m pretty sure I’m not the one you’re looking for. Look at my dad over there.” I pointed to the frumpy computer programmer flailing his hands in the air. “Does he look like the devil to you?”
“Are you sure he’s your biological father? Is there any chance you’re adopted?”
I looked down at my knees, my heart pounding. It was a secret no one knew. Even my parents didn’t know I’d found the paperwork in the back of their fireproof safe when I was searching for my birth certificate for a school project. I was adopted. They’d never told me and I didn’t breathe a word about what I’d found. The papers didn’t say much. Just a hospital name. Not even a birthdate. It was undetermined. I’d always wondered if my parents chose July 31st or if the hospital did.
“I’m not adopted.” I still wasn’t sure about Ian, especially since he would be the first person I ever told. He hadn’t earned the right to know yet.
He didn’t say anything, just grunted a tiny bit. Maybe he didn’t believe me, which was ironic since I wasn’t sure I believed him either. But if he’d seen the wings, then I couldn’t deny they were real. I had touched them. I could still feel the unearthly softness on my fingertips. It was a memory that wouldn’t fade anytime soon.
“We’ll figure this out together.” He draped his arm around my shoulder.
“There’s nothing to figure out,” I insisted. “My mom is missing and my house is on fire. That’s all that matters.”
He leaned in and whispered in my ear. “Raven, you know that’s not true. Even if you don’t want to admit to it to me, you know there’s something bigger going on here. What if your mom was taken by a demon searching for you? If I’m on to your scent, I may not be the only one. You’ve managed to confuse them for years with the Catholic school thing and whatever charm is protecting you.”
