by Kate L. Mary
“Kellan—” My voice broke, and once again I found myself in his arms.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered against my head.
“Not to interrupt, but we need to go,” Cade said. “Now.”
Kellan pulled back but didn’t let me go completely. Instead, he slid his hand down my arm until his fingers were entwined with mine.
“The sooner we get out of here, the better. Those assholes,” he nodded to the dead man at our feet, “expected their friends to be back hours ago.”
“Then let’s not stand around talking about it,” Emma said, pulling Harper to the door.
Kellan didn’t release my hand as he headed after them, pulling me with him, and Cade took up the rear. We moved into the small entryway and paused before pushing the doors open. I was holding my breath, my gun in the hand not held by Kellan’s, and half expecting the parking lot to now be flooded with men and zombies, but it was as silent as it had been before.
“What do we do?” Emma nodded to the car. “Take their car so we can get to our own faster, or go back the way we came?”
Cade chewed on his lip for a moment. “Walk. I don’t want to risk passing those assholes. This way, if they show up while we’re on our way, they’ll think we’re long gone and maybe they won’t try to find us.”
“Makes sense,” Kellan said. “How’d you get here?”
Cade headed for the back of the building. “This way.”
20
“We’re low on gas,” Cade muttered as he sped through the wildlife refuge.
The roads were a windy mess of cracks and weeds, curling around mountains and past gorges, but we were making good time. More importantly, we hadn’t seen anyone else either on foot or in a car, which meant the assholes who’d grabbed Harper and Kellan would have no idea how to find us.
“We can stop at Quartz Mountain.” Emma, who was sitting in the passenger seat, leaned down to pull the old atlas out from under her seat. “It’s closer than the shelter.”
“We might have to,” Cade muttered, his gaze alternating between the gas gauge and the road.
I was in the back, wedged between Harper and Kellan. Having his firm body pressed against mine made me feel grounded, and the way he rested his hand on my knee only added to the feeling of security. He was here and whole. Even better, things had shifted between us. We hadn’t talked about it yet, but I could feel it. The change had been a slow and torturous process, but it had also happened in the blink of an eye, taking me completely by surprise.
Kellan leaned forward, his hand still on my leg. “Do we have enough to trade?”
“It’s going to have to be.” Cade glanced over his shoulder at Kellan. “You have connections there, right?”
“You know I do, but I don’t know if even I can pull strings like that. Fuel is hard to come by.”
“Well, I don’t know if we have a choice.”
“You can always sell your body,” Emma said, looking at Kellan. “I’m sure you could get us a couple gallons with that physique.”
“Oh, I know I could.” Kellan laughed and shot me a wink. “I just don’t think we’re desperate enough to stoop to that level yet.”
“As much as I hate to disagree with a man who practically just came back from the dead,” Cade said as his hands tightened on the steering wheel, “we’re going to be pretty fucking desperate by the time we get there.”
Emma leaned over to comfort him, and the dog-eared atlas slid onto the floor. “It’s going to be okay. We’ll figure it out.”
Cade only nodded in response.
At my side, Harper was silent, and I couldn’t help wondering if she was struggling over what she’d done back at the chapel. She’d killed a man, and though I’d felt certain before stepping into that building that I would be able to do the same thing, I was no longer sure. Taking a life was a big deal, even these days, and I’d watched the struggle Kellan went through after taking that step himself.
“How are you doing?” I asked Harper, keeping my voice low in hopes that the conversation would be able to stay between us despite the close quarters.
She shrugged and sucked her bottom lip into her mouth, gnawing on it like she wasn’t sure what to say.
“They deserved it.” Emma didn’t look back. “They’ve killed a lot of people just in this area. Who knows how many other states they’ve done the same thing in.”
Harper swallowed, her head bobbing slowly, but said nothing.
I gave her knee a little pat, and at the same moment Kellan’s fingers tightened on mine, giving me a reassuring squeeze.
The sun was coming up when we rounded the bend and Lake Altus finally came into view. Cade slowed, giving us a chance to get a look at the lake for the first time since the rainy weather had started. The orange glow from the swiftly rising sun reflected off the sparkling waters, which were breathtaking in the early morning light. Unlike last time we were here, the water level had spilled over into the old parking lot, threatening to engulf the whole thing.
“Someone needs to figure out how to open the spillway,” Cade said.
“There has to be someone around who can do it,” Emma murmured.
“Who knows?” Cade accelerated, and we started moving again. “They haven’t had to worry about it since the zombies. The lake’s gotten lower every year.”
I stared out the window at the lake as we drove, awed by how full it was compared to last time I was here, and a sudden memory of playing in the water with Kellan and Matt when we were younger came back to me.
“Remember coming here as kids?” I asked him.
He grinned and nodded. “I remember how angry you got when I threw you off your dad’s boat.”
I rolled my eyes but returned his smile. “I remember swimming with you and Matt.”
“We could do it again.” Kellan nodded toward the lake. “You could break out that bikini.”
His smile widened, and heat rushed to my face. In the front, Emma exchanged a look with Cade, and when she glanced back, her eyes were burning with questions.
I looked away. She would no doubt be grilling me very soon, but since Kellan and I hadn’t talked about what was going on, there was no way I could talk to her about it. Not yet, anyway.
The settlement came into view, and Cade slowed. The road in front of us was equipped with roadblocks to ensure no cars were able to speed through the gate, and he was forced to slow so he could maneuver around them.
The Quartz Mountain settlement was located in what had once been a resort. There was only one road in, and water and mountains surrounded the rest of the land, which had made fortifying the resort easy. Even better, the place had been a hotel to begin with, which had made it an ideal location to start up a settlement. There was the main lodge, which had over a hundred rooms, as well as a dozen or so cabins that were perfect for a small family, and the Mountainview Bunkhouse, which had sleeping space for about fifty more. Honestly, if something happened to our shelter and we had to move, I would be more inclined to head here than to try to find a place in Altus. It was just nicer.
Cade slowed to a stop when we reached the barrier, but he didn’t shut off the engine. A few seconds passed before the gate opened, and five men came out. Three stayed where they were, aiming rifles at us as the other two moved forward. They were both armed as well, but halfway to the truck the man in the lead lowered his gun. He was smiling by the time he stopped next to us.
“Cade.” He peered inside, his grin widening when he looked in the back. “Kellan.”
“How you doing, Nate?” Kellan asked.
“I thought I might see you two soon,” the guard said.
Cade frowned at him. “Why’s that?”
Nate returned the gesture, surprised or confused by the question. “Blake.”
“He’s here?” Emma asked.
Nate’s frown gave way to a smile once again, and he chuckled. “I assumed you knew. Yeah, he’s here. Showed up yesterday out of the blue with a group from Altus
. I thought it was weird, but I didn’t ask.”
“He’s taking a breather.” Cade’s hands tightened on the steering wheel, but from my position in the back seat, I couldn’t tell what he was thinking.
Nate’s gaze moved to Emma, and he nodded. “I figured.”
He stepped back and waved to the other men before saying to Cade, “Head on in.”
“Thanks, Nate.”
Nate nodded again. “Good to see you.”
When we’d started driving, Emma turned to face Kellan and me. “Did you know he was going to be here?”
Kellan shrugged but said, “He mentioned something about it. You know, Altus never was his home to begin with.”
Emma’s cheeks, which were already pink, grew darker, and she looked down. “I know.”
Her gaze stopped on Kellan’s hand, still on my knee, and then her brown eyes were up again and narrowed on my face. She looked between the two of us a few times but said nothing. When she turned back around, though, it seemed like she was trying to hold back a grin.
Kellan squeezed my knee.
There was a ridiculous amount of space for parking inside the settlement, even with half the old lot now taken up by a pen and stable for horses. Cade pulled into one of the dozens of spots and turned off the truck. He hadn’t said a word since we’d learned Blake was here, and the expression on Cade’s face told me he was feeling like shit about the whole thing. I got what both of them were going through. Blake and Emma had been a disaster nearly from the beginning, even if they had stuck it out for almost seven years, and things between her and Cade had seemed right from the first moment they got together. It still had to hurt Blake like hell that he hadn’t been able to make her happy, though, and having to see her in a new relationship that was clearly so meant to be made it twice as bad.
“Harper.” Emma had twisted in her seat and was facing us when she held up a white bandage. “I know the bite is mostly healed, but we should cover it up before we go in there. We don’t need anyone knowing you’ve been bitten and are immune.”
Harper flushed as she took the bandage. “Good idea.”
It was, and my stomach dropped when I thought about what could happen if word did get around that we had an immune person living with us. Nothing good, that was for sure.
When we climbed out, the debris littering the old blacktop told me this area hadn’t been spared by the storm that had rolled through yesterday, but none of the buildings looked like they’d been damaged by it.
We crossed the parking lot, headed for the lodge. The once pristine lawn was now riddled with weeds, and there were even areas where the grass had died completely, thanks to the years of little or no rain. Still, the settlement was beautiful. The lodge, although showing its age, was still magnificent, and the surrounding mountains had been a sight to behold even during the drought. Now that green had sprouted up all over the place, though, they were even more breathtaking. The rising sun over the now full lake only added to the view, and despite everything we’d been through—my fears for Kellan, the emotions still surging through me, and my lack of sleep—I found myself smiling as we walked.
Kellan, who was walking at my side, elbowed me. “You look happy.”
“I’m happy you’re okay.”
His gaze held mine, and even though his smile didn’t falter, his Adam’s apple bobbed. I had so many thoughts and feelings and questions going through my head, but with everyone else around, I couldn’t ask any of them.
Emma was watching us like a hawk, and when I looked away from Kellan, my gaze met hers. She gave me a little grin and winked, and my cheeks burst into flames. That was the problem with living in such close quarters. There was no privacy.
The closer we got to the main lodge, the more people we saw. It was like a normal town, only more open than anything else we’d seen since the zombies because it had already been so well fortified. Families walked hand in hand, kids played, and we even passed a couple lounging on the grass on top of a blanket, her head in his lap as they stared at one another. It felt like stepping into the past, and the ache that spread through me was for a million different things. For the people I’d lost, for the future I would never have, and for the things my children—assuming I had some—would never get to experience.
Inside, the lobby was buzzing with activity. A trading post was set up in one of the old banquet rooms, and the old restaurant was still in use, although the menu was very different than it had been before. Moonshine and home brewed beers had replaced the booze that was now long gone—not that anyone seemed to mind—and the stew that graced the menu was bound to have the meat from any of a number of different animals in the area. Steak, thanks to the thriving longhorn population, was also easy to come by.
We stopped at the old check-in desk. It had been turned into a place where newcomers could get information about where to trade things as well as inquire about open rooms. Unlike the little inn we’d stayed at in Altus, Quartz Mountain had once been a real hotel, and they’d kept a block of rooms unoccupied so people passing through had a place to stay.
The woman behind the desk smiled when we stopped in front of her. “You look like you could use a room.”
“Man, could we,” Kellan said, “but unfortunately, we’re hoping to get in and out.”
The woman tisked a couple times and gave him a sympathetic smile. “Bless your heart.”
The idea of sharing a room with Kellan warmed me. My stomach fluttered just thinking about it. We’d shared rooms and beds before, and we’d even lived in the same condo when we were both still minors, but this was different. We’d kissed, and he’d had his hand on my knee the whole drive here. Even if we hadn’t talked about it yet, things between us had shifted, and everyone knew it.
But Kellan was right. Jasper would be waiting for us to return. Worrying more and more with each passing hour. Especially now that the sun was up.
“I’m going to need to see someone about gas,” he said. “Who do you suggest?”
“Gas, huh? I might could make a suggestion or two.” The woman pressed her lips together thoughtfully. “I’d ask for Hector. He has some connections that come in and out, running fuel from the sanctioned settlements in other parts of the country to areas that need it. I’m pretty sure he’s around today.”
“What if he isn’t?” I asked.
She drummed her fingers on the counter. “Priscilla might have a few gallons stashed away. If not, she could know where to find it.”
Kellan slapped his hand on the desk and grinned, showing off his dimples. “Thanks.”
The woman returned the smile. “Good luck to you.”
Kellan turned away from the desk and headed for the ballroom where the market was set up, his gaze focused on Cade as he went. “We’ll take the left side, you take Emma and Harper to the right. Hopefully, if we split up one of us will be able to find either Hector or Priscilla. We need to get this done as fast as possible so we can get home. Jasper has to be worried.”
He didn’t look at me, but I could read between the lines. He was sending them away to expedite things, but also because he wanted to be alone with me. Possibly to grab a few minutes to talk.
Cade nodded as his gaze flitted from Kellan to me, but it was brief and gave nothing away about what he was thinking. Which was so Cade. After things with Emma and Blake had ended, we’d learned Cade had been harboring feelings for her for years. None of us had suspected a thing, though. He had a poker face that would have made pre-apocalypse gamblers die of jealousy.
“Sounds good,” Cade said.
When we reached the market, he grabbed Emma’s hand and headed off with Harper trailing behind them while Kellan and I moved to the other side of the room. Emma looked back once and shot me a wink, and my face warmed at the knowing look in her eyes.
Kellan took my hand as we wove our way through the crowd, saying nothing. The simple feeling of having my hand in his made my heart beat harder. I looked his way out of the corner of m
y eye, studying him, dying to know what he was thinking and feeling. Too bad the expression on his face gave nothing away.
We’d reached the other side of the room when Kellan surprised me by pulling me into a dark hallway.
“What are you—” The intense expression in his eyes made the words die on my lips.
My heart quickened when he stopped. Before I could even register what was happening, his mouth was on mine, his hands on either side of my face as his lips moved over mine. The kiss was slow, but somehow forceful at the same time. My legs wobbled, and I grabbed his arms, holding myself up as I returned the kiss. I was on my toes even though I wasn’t much shorter than he was, desperate to be closer. When his tongue ran over my lips, I opened my mouth without thinking, following his lead like I’d done every single day over the last nine years.
I’d been dreaming about this moment for more than a year, but nothing I’d imagined could have prepared me for this. For the feelings swirling through me, for the need and desire. For the throb that had started in my body the second our lips met, or how it grew in intensity as we kissed.
He broke the kiss too soon, but didn’t move his hands. They stayed on my face, one on each side as he studied me, his brown eyes holding mine.
“How long have you felt like this?” he finally asked, breaking the silence.
“I don’t know.” I shrugged, suddenly unsure despite the knowledge that he felt the same way. “A year.”
“I convinced myself you didn’t see me like that. That you only thought of me as a brother. Or worse, as your brother’s annoying friend.”
“I did,” I said, “for a long time. But something changed. I didn’t even notice it at first.” I paused when what he’d said sank in. He’d wanted me as much as I wanted him? “How long have you liked me, Kellan?”
“Forever.” The corner of his mouth quirked up the way I loved, showing off the dimple in his left cheek. “I think I’ve always liked you.”
“But you were so mean to me before. You always treated me like I was a pest.”
Kellan’s grin grew wide, and he leaned down and planted a soft kiss on my lips. “I didn’t want to admit I had a thing for my best friend’s little sister. Even to myself.”
