He knew that he admired her. She was different than other women he knew. She had passion and fire and an inner inquisitiveness and fascination for life he had forgotten even existed. She seemed interested in everything and saw life as a possibility rather than a futility. It was that excitement and difference that drew him in. He just didn’t know how much.
He did know that his father and uncles were right. Her job here needed to end. No one should know about the Buchanan past. It should be buried with the last of them. But he also knew that time would eventually catch up with them. Family scandals were big business. The more notable the family, the more the media sensationalized the scandal. His family wasn’t immune. They’d had scandals in the past. But the real scandal was the truth about his family’s beginnings and that truth was buried deep in the attic and basements of the family home. But Andre knew that nothing stays buried forever, not secrets and not even the truth.
What’s the worst that could happen?
Jo turned and saw Andre sitting up in bed, the sheet casually draped across his legs. It looked as if he was deep in thought. She smiled and shook her head, damned if he didn’t look too sexy sitting there. “Hey,” she said seductively, walking back to the bed.
“Hey yourself,” Andre said, seeing her approach in the darkness, “can’t sleep?”
She shrugged and shook her head. “Sometimes it’s like that. When it is I either get up in the middle of the night and work, or I just sit and look out the window.”
“What’s so interesting looking out at the night?” he asked.
“The sky, I love looking out at the night sky. It’s so limitless with endless possibilities. And here in Alaska it’s even more so. We’re all so small and insignificant compared to the power of all that. It makes you believe anything is possible.”
“Anything is possible,” he assured her.
“Not for some people,” she said.
“You want to tell me about it?”
“Tell you about what?” she asked evasively.
“About whatever’s troubling you.”
“What makes you think something’s troubling me?” she asked. He smiled his answer. “Lucky guess,” she said, sitting on the side of the bed. She shook her head and half smiled as she kissed him tenderly. “Tell me something, why are you so different now?”
“You mean different from the spoiled, arrogant self-centered jerk before?” he asked. She grimaced knowing that he was paraphrasing her words. She nodded slowly. “I don’t know. I think it has something to do with you being here.”
“You mean our, no ties, no strings, uncommitted, pure mutual physical pleasure just sex, turned you into a new man? I doubt that.”
“Well, maybe it has something to do with the rules of engagement changing. Uncomplicated has suddenly gotten complicated and just sex isn’t just sex for either of us, is it?”
She shook her head. “No. But where does that lead us?”
“I don’t know yet, but for right now it leads you to tell me what’s bothering you. Maybe I can help,” he prompted.
She sighed and looked away, “Ghosts.”
“Past or present?”
“Both.”
“Ah, the worst kind, the ones you know and the ones you see coming but can’t do anything about. Is there anything I can do to ease your troubles, silence the ghosts?”
“No, just being here with you helps,” she said, “thank you. I guess I need to take back all the things I said about you.”
“You mean I’m not still an arrogant self-centered jerk?”
“Well, maybe not the jerk part,” she joked. They laughed.
“Come here,” he whispered softly. She moved closer. He leaned down and kissed her tenderly. Afterward he looked into her eyes and gently touched the side of her face. “This wasn’t the plan.”
“What plan? What do you mean?” she asked.
“It doesn’t matter. What matters is that everything’s changed. You changed it. I never meant to feel this way, but I do. I love you,” he said.
She beamed happily. “That’s great, because I love you too.”
He pulled her gently into his arms and kissed her lovingly. Then they lay back, cocooned in their new love. She closed her eyes and sighed as he held her tight and stroked her back.
“Mmm, this feels so right,” she whispered.
Andre wrapped his arms tighter as she snuggled closer. The realization didn’t hit him as hard as he expected, but she was right, being here together did feel right. None of this was supposed to be real, at least on his part, but now it was. He loved her, but he had also manipulated her. He feared that everything she was feeling he had manipulated to get rid of her, or at the very least keep her distracted in order to perpetuate the Buchanan lie.
Andre opened his eyes when he heard Jo’s steady, even breathing. She was asleep. He was awake. There’s no way he could sleep after his confession. A part of him wished it was a lie, but it wasn’t. He did love her. The question now was how could he protect his family and love her at the same time? It was impossible. The troubling thoughts continued to run through his mind until he dozed off.
A few hours later Andre woke up again. This time the touch of dawn had just tipped over the horizon. Stiff and tired, his body protested the early hour, but he knew he had to get up. He’d been off schedule for the last few days. It was time to get back to it. He looked down at the woman curled around him in his bed, the cause for his recently disrupted schedule. She was definitely worth it.
He smiled remembering their night of passion. Last night was the most exciting night he could remember. Slow and deliberate, they’d made love. Their bodies meshed, but it was way past the physical act. Waking up beside her, reaching for her in the night and having her there made it clear.
She’d gotten to him and damned if he wasn’t letting her. He got up, showered and dressed in sweats to go for a run and clear his clouded thoughts. The cold morning mountain air always invigorated him. It had a way of slicing through hesitation and confusion and refocusing his energy. He needed that today.
Everything about his current objective had been compromised. Not only was he second-guessing his motives, but he was second-guessing his job. Being wrong about someone was never an issue he considered. Neither was falling in love. He’d raised the red flag to his family about Jo, they’d agreed, now he wanted to reverse course four days in. He shook his head. He really needed to refocus.
“Hey, good morning, you leaving me already?” she asked, seeing him sitting across the room tying his running shoes.
“Good morning,” he said, smiling up at her, admiring the delectable sight of her lying in his big bed after a night of lovemaking. He could definitely get used to seeing her there on a more permanent basis. “How’d you sleep?”
“Great. You’re my hero, you chased the ghosts away.”
“That’s what heroes do,” he joked.
“You know, you’re pretty handy to have around.”
“I’m glad you think so,” he said, as he walked over and stood beside the bed. “Maybe I’ll hang around a lot more. What do you think?”
“I think I’d like that. Last night was a dream. I can hardly believe any of it was real.”
He eased down beside her. “You weren’t dreaming. It was all real, everything, even the part when I told you that I love you.”
She smiled warmly. Hearing the words from him again was like the beginning of a new world for her. “I love you too. I think I just wanted to hear you say it again. So, are you going for a run?” she asked. He nodded. “How long are you going to be?”
“Two hours tops, afterward I’m going to grab breakfast for us. There’s nothing in the house except coffee. And if I’m gonna have you in my bed all day I think we might need some nourishment,” he said, leaning over to kiss her shoulder. “We have things to do.”
“In bed all day?” she asked, as he continued kissing her shoulder arm and neck. “And what if I already have plans
? I do have a job to do. And what about your job, don’t you need to right the wrongs against the Buchanan family?”
“Not today. Today is solely for me. The only job I have is to make love to you over and over and over again.” He smiled greedily as he licked his lips and lovingly stroked her thigh and waist.
“Ah, a hero’s noble sacrifice. Well, in that case I guess the least I could do is make the coffee, give you a taste of my more domestic side,” she said seductively.
“That’s not the side I’m interested in at the moment.” He pulled the sheet down, revealing her breasts with nipples already hard. He smiled as soon as he saw the unveiling. “Now that’s what I call a morning eye opener. I think I’ll skip the run and have breakfast right here, right now.” He dipped down and captured her nipple in his mouth.
She giggled and moved away. “No, go, run and get breakfast. I’ll be here waiting when you get back.”
“Don’t move. I’ll be right back,” he whispered close as he looked down the length of her body smiling and shaking his head admiringly. She was too tempting. “An hour and a half,” he said.
“Wait, I have my flash drive with me and I need to write some notes. Can I use your computer if I promise not to snoop?”
Andre went still. His ex-wife got into his computer without asking and nearly destroyed his family. He looked into Jo’s joyous sparkling eyes. There was no deceit or betrayal, only love. Like never before, this was a test of his trust. Both his mind and heart told him that Jo wouldn’t betray him. “Sure. It’s in the office downstairs.”
“Thanks, it’ll only take forty-five minutes, I promise. I’ll meet you in the tub afterward.”
“In that case, I’ll be back in an hour,” he promised. He gave her a quick kiss, then got up and hurried out.
Jo chuckled as she watched him leave. His humorous hastened retreat only added to her love for him. He made her feel so good. She had opened her heart and he was there to protect and cherish it. She rolled over and looked up at the skylight. It was still mostly dark outside since the sun had barely tipped the horizon, but she already knew it was going to be a fantastic day. A giggle bubbled inside then came out as tearful joy. She couldn’t help herself. For the first time in her life she felt happy, really happy.
She closed her eyes, feeling the anger and pain she had held onto for so long wash away. She was ready to stop running and it was a relief. For so long she carried around the emotional scars of her past. Insecurities and apprehension ruled her life and made her vulnerable. In defense, she had closed herself down emotionally. But now this was a brand-new day. No more drama, no more secrets and no more pain. She found a man who would not use and betray her.
She got up feeling incredible. She knew nothing could possibly bring her down. She went to the bathroom and immediately saw the large sunken tub in the center of the room. The idea of being in there with Andre got her excited all over again.
She grabbed a quick shower and put on her clothes. Afterward she went downstairs to the kitchen to make coffee for Andre’s return. She found the home office and sat down at the computer. She inserted her flash drive and started typing. The phone rang. She ignored the message being left until she heard her name mentioned. She stopped cold. Her heart sank as her head pounded, nearly blinding her. Gasping, panting, she couldn’t breathe. Instantly an e-mail message screen popped up. She read the message, but didn’t open the attachments. She didn’t have to. She already knew what they were. They were her life. She went back upstairs to get dressed. It was time to leave.
Chapter 15
A quick rush of cold air hit Andre as soon as he stepped outside. He took a deep breath and released it slowly as he looked around. Seeing Juneau the past few days with Jo had given him a new insight into his home. He’d taken it for granted, not seeing the beauty all around him. He looked up at the mountains, behind them a brand-new day. The idea of spending it with Jo made him smile. Then the idea of spending it in a sunken tub with her made him hard.
He stretched, walked down the steps and started his run. Taking his usual route, he ran down the main road, across the dirt path down through the thicket of trees which would lead him along the water’s edge. The clarity of his thoughts and feelings intensified as he ran. He’d been waiting for Jo all his life. She was exactly what he needed.
The run was even shorter than he expected. Twenty-five minutes in to it his cell phone rang. He slowed and answered breathlessly. It was Ben Rhames. “Good, I caught you running.”
“Yeah, you have something for me?” Andre asked, slowing even more, but keeping a steady, even pace.
“Yeah, I have your father on the other line, I’ll patch him through.”
“Good morning, son, looks like you were right. We have problems,” Daniel said as soon as the connection was set.
“What’s going on?” Andre asked.
“I’ve already discussed this with your father. It looks like Ms. Butler has more to hide than we thought. She got into some legal problems,” Ben said.
“What kind of legal problems?” Andre asked.
“A lot of it’s unsubstantiated, but I’m still working on it.”
“Tell him what you have so far,” Daniel said.
Ben proceeded to tell Andre about his preliminary findings. He started off with personal information then got into more details. The more he relayed, the slower Andre ran. After a while he stopped and just listened. The information was far more damaging than he expected. Apparently Jo’s past was more checkered than she had let on.
“Are you absolutely sure about this last part?” Andre asked.
“Positive. A high-powered D.C. attorney filed suit against her. The proceedings were closed for privacy of course and there’s a gag order, but my information is on target.”
“What was the suit about?” he asked.
“I’m hearing everything from attempted blackmail to an accomplice to the desolation of marriage to theft, libel and perpetration of fraud. There’s a lot of hearsay and rumors, but no one knows for sure because of the gag order. I do know that before going to the grand jury, a major portion of the suit was dropped. Afterward the judge ordered all her files relinquished and reviewed. Ms. Butler refused. She appealed and lost, subsequently she turned the files over to the court. It seemed power, money and political influence won the day.”
Andre remembered Jo talking about her loathing for people with power and money, and the deliberate way they influenced others. “So there’s nothing substantial.”
“I call fraud, libel and blackmail pretty substantial charges. Sounds to me like she had an affair with her client then tried to blackmail him. Do you know who the attorneys represented?” Daniel asked.
“A U.S. senator, that’s all I know for sure.”
“A politician,” Andre muttered to himself. He remembered Jo’s admission to working with a politician over a year ago. He had no doubt that this was whom she was talking about. “Which one?” Andre asked.
“I’m still working on getting a name. The attorneys are running interference.”
“That’s one in a hundred,” Daniel said.
“Although when this gag order ends, all bets are off. For the last few months everyone’s sitting on a powder keg.”
“A powder keg, how so?” Andre asked.
“Whatever happened, whatever she did, whatever she knows she could conceivably write an exposé and basically bring down somebody’s house of cards.”
“Not if she has no evidence to back up her claims. The courts took her files, right?” Daniel said.
“Not necessarily, Dad,” Andre injected. “Being PR I know that public opinion is far more damaging to companies and careers than anything else. Evidence is rarely needed.”
“Andre’s right, if this senator is important enough then it doesn’t matter about legitimate proof, the damage will be done. You can bet there’s a politician out there somewhere counting the days. Rumor has it that Ms. Butler’s business partner and atto
rney, Pamela Gibson, Lydia Gibson’s daughter, has been inundated with publishing offers for months. The media smells blood; they just don’t know whose it is, yet.”
“Why didn’t any of this come up before?” Daniel asked.
“Although the gag order was holding tight, the unnamed senator is quietly pushing for some kind of a nondisclosure national security letter to keep Ms. Butler legally quiet, but that request doesn’t look as if it will succeed. Whatever she knows is of a personal nature and not of national security interest.”
“Find out which senator,” Andre said.
“I’m already on it,” Ben said. “You also should know that there’s a tabloid newspaper offering her twenty-five thousand dollars for the exclusive article, sight unseen.”
“This doesn’t sound right,” Andre muttered. “There’s something wrong.”
“You’re damned right there’s something wrong,” Daniel said gruffly. “We let this woman into the family home and we’re giving her access to our past. Can you imagine the damage she can cause? No wonder she refused to leave. She sees another meal ticket.”
“No, I don’t buy it,” Andre said, “I know her.”
“Come on, Andre, this isn’t like you. Since when do you turn against the family?”
“I’m not turning against the family. It just doesn’t make sense.”
“Fine, then tell me, why else is she still there? Why be so adamant about staying? It can’t be just to write a bio. She’s here to get information to blackmail us. Can you imagine how much the other tabloids would counteroffer?”
“Maybe, maybe not,” Ben said.
“Obviously she has more than a passing interest in the Buchanan family. Fraud, blackmail, looks like she intends to do the same thing to us,” Daniel said. “She had an affair with a senator to further her career.”
“We don’t know that, Dad. There’s no evidence to support any of this,” Andre said defensively. “We need more information before jumping to conclusions.”
“It’s feasible, that’s all the conclusion I need. I for one don’t intend to sit around and wait for her to do her damage. I talked to your grandfather, but he’s still adamant about her being there. He’s enamored with the woman, but this will change his mind.”
When It Feels So Right Page 15
