“Okay?” I asked, still feeling somewhat stunned by her response.
“Yeah.”
“You sure, gorgeous? I don’t want you to have any doubts.”
When she smiled that brilliant white smile, I couldn’t help it; I leaned in and pressed my lips against hers. “Are you trying to talk me out of it?” she asked against my lips and I could feel her laughter.
“No! Hell no.” I jumped from my chair and grabbed hold of her hand, pulling her through the club as fast as I could move. I had to check myself once or twice when I felt her stumble in those heels. My patience having run its course, I pulled her to me and wrapped an arm around her waist, lifting her against my side so her feet barely met the floor.
“Wait,” she started as soon as we exited the club and I led her toward a waiting cab. “What about Caleb and Piper?”
Whipping my phone out of my pocket with my free hand, I kept hold of her with my other as I typed out a quick text.
Me: Cabbing home with Freya. Stay at Piper’s tonight or die….seriously.
Without waiting for a response, I slid the phone back in my pocket and moved for the cab. “All done. Let’s go.”
The sound of her giggling as I all but shoved her into the back of the cab warmed my chest and caused me to smile. I couldn’t wait to get this girl home. And she’d be lucky if I ever let her out again.
In the span of a few seconds, the atmosphere around us shifted. The sexual tension was still there in full force, but where we had been laughing and smiling as we left the club, at that moment, Parker sat pressed against the door of the cab, his jaw clenched and his fingers opening and closing in tight fists. My heart plummeted at the thought he had possibly changed his mind.
“Um…” I dragged out, twisting my hands together in my lap. “Are you okay?”
All I got in response was a quick nod. I felt my self-confidence dwindle with each passing moment.
“Are you mad?”
His demeanor softened as he looked over at me, the heat still evident in his eyes. “No, sweetheart. I’m not mad, but if I touch you right now, I’m liable to lose control and never stop.”
My entire body heated at his confession and I suddenly wanted him to lose control. Just as I opened my mouth to say so, the cab came to a halt.
“We’re here,” the driver announced in a raspy smoker’s voice.
Parker reached into his pocket and pulled his wallet out, tossing a few bills to the driver before opening the door and helping me from the back, never releasing my hand from his own. Neither of us spoke as we ascended the stairs to his apartment. He used his free hand to rummage in his pocket for his keys and unlocked the door, pulling me behind him. The sound of the deadbolt sliding into place echoed through the space, sending my heart rate into overdrive. Parker’s hands and lips were on my skin before my eyes had time to adjust to the dark room.
“Tell me to stop and I will,” he spoke against my ear before giving the lobe a soft nip with his teeth. “At any point.”
“Mmm, don’t stop,” I moaned, my head falling back at the intoxicating feel of his body against mine. That seemed to be all the reassurance he needed. Sliding his hands down my thighs, he cupped the backs of my knees and hauled me up, wrapping my legs around his waist as he moved toward his bedroom.
I could feel how hard he was through his jeans as each step he took pressed his erection into my center, sending shockwaves of pleasure I hadn’t felt in two long years through my body. The instant we entered his room, he kicked the door shut behind him and dropped me on the bed, causing me to whimper at the loss of his touch.
“Christ, gorgeous,” he growled as he crawled across my body. “Do you have any idea what you’re doing to me, right now?”
“Please,” I begged wantonly, needing to feel his body against mine more than anything else. “Please, Parker.”
“What do you need, sweetheart?” he whispered in my ear before trailing feather-light kisses across my neck and collarbone. As he hovered over me on his hands and knees, it felt like there were miles separating us. I was desperate for him.
“You,” I said on an exhale. “I need you.”
I blinked rapidly, wracked by a massive wave of emotion my confession had just caused. I needed him to the point that it almost scared me. Before I could wrap my head around what I’d just admitted, he was off the bed and yanking his clothes off like a mad man. I had no time to bask in the glory of Parker’s delectable naked form before his hands were on me, stripping me of every article of clothing. Once he finished, he hovered over me once again, staring at me with so much devotion I felt tears well up in my eyes.
“You have me. You’ve had me since the moment I walked onto that beach and saw you sitting there looking so sad. You’ll have me forever, baby.”
He entered me in one quick, hard thrust and I cried out at the combination of pleasure and pain it caused. He filled me so perfectly, so completely that the sensation of it all was almost too much to bear and I had to clench my eyes shut.
“Did I hurt you?”
When I finally opened my eyes and looked up at his face, the concern staring back at me had me reaching up to run my fingers along his jaw.
“No. Please don’t stop.”
Parker pulled out slowly so as not to hurt me before gently pushing back inside. I felt my body relax with every slow thrust he made. I had no concept of time as he made love to me slowly. It could have been minutes or hours that passed, but the pressure low in my belly grew stronger and stronger, and his gentle movements weren’t enough.
“Faster, Parker. Harder.”
He granted my request, pulling out and pushing back in so hard my back arched off the bed and my head fell back into the pillows, a deep, guttural moan escaping from my throat. I panted his name over and over as he continued to move. I felt myself getting closer to release every time he plunged back into me.
One of Parker’s hands wrapped in my hair, directing my head so we were looking into each other’s eyes. “God, Freya,” he groaned. “I love you so much.”
I gasped at his declaration as his hips sped up. “Love you so fucking much, baby. Never stopped.”
“Parker,” I whimpered.
“Don’t leave me.” I couldn’t respond. I had no idea what to say. His eyes pleaded with me as his body took everything mine had to give. The pleasure building inside of me coupled with the fierce look in his eyes had rendered me speechless. “Don’t leave me again, baby. I can’t live without you. I don’t want to.”
With that, I shattered completely, crying out his name as wave after wave of the most intense pleasure I’d ever felt pulled me under. My release was so long, so forceful, that by the time I started coming down, I was gasping for much needed air. Three more thrusts was all it took for Parker to follow me over the edge, burying his head in the crook of my shoulder as he groaned with his own climax. His arms shook before finally giving out. As he rolled to his side, he snaked his arms around me, holding on tightly like he was afraid I’d disappear if he let go. Sleep eventually tugged at my consciousness insistently as my mind reeled. Euphoria and fear battled against each other in my mind in those last few conscious seconds.
As sleep pulled me under, I couldn’t help but question which one was going to win out.
I could practically hear her struggling with her thoughts.
I’d been lying with her wrapped in my arms for close to an hour. I worked to keep my breathing steady so she would think I was asleep, but the truth was I’d been awake the whole time. It was impossible to sleep when what I’d been craving for the past couple of years was finally in my bed, her sweet, warm body pressed against me. I spent the time studying every curve and slope of her face, counting every single freckle that spread across her nose. I wanted to memorize her every feature. When she woke up I knew, deep in my gut, that she would start overthinking everything, analyzing what had happened between us to death until she could come up with a logical reason to shut herself down
once again.
I tightened my arms around her waist when she shifted in my hold, trying to slip out quietly.
“Been wondering when you were going to try and make your move,” I whispered in her ear. Her body grew stiff as a board for several seconds before she turned to look at me over her shoulder.
“You’ve been awake this whole time?”
“Yep.” I couldn’t help but grin. She looked so cute all wide-eyed and busted. “I’ve been listening to those wheels spinning in your head for the last hour.”
She huffed out a long breath before shifting in my arms again. I let her go this time, but only because it was obvious she needed a little space. I’d give her a few feet but over my dead body was she leaving the apartment. What had happened between us tonight had taken intensity to an entirely new level. I got that she was freaked, but we needed to talk through it.
A smile spread across my lips as she picked up a t-shirt from my floor and gave it a sniff test before pulling it over her head. I loved that she was wearing my shirt even though the damn thing fell to the middle of her thighs, covering up all that beautiful, naked skin.
“First of all, let me just start off by saying I’m clean.” Freya’s brows furrowed in confusion as she rested against my desk. Obviously she wasn’t planning on coming back to bed anytime soon, so I climbed from under the covers and slid on a pair of boxer briefs. I almost considered throwing on a pair of jeans when I saw her bright blue eyes checking me out. Yeah, I figured I’d stick with just the underwear.
“We didn’t use protection, baby. I’m clean, I swear. I haven’t been with anyone since the last time I was with you—”
“Really?!” Her eyes widened to the size of salad plates.
“Don’t look so surprised. I told you, you’re it for me.”
“This is all just—” She ran her hands through her hair anxiously. I knew exactly what she was about to say, and although it twisted my gut into knots, it didn’t lessen my determination. “It’s moving so fast. I need some time to think.”
I tried so hard to remain composed, I really did. But it was damn hard to do when I stood there watching her backslide right in front of me. My anger fueled me to fight for her, for us.
“That’s bullshit and you know it, gorgeous.”
Her eyes flicked to me in surprise before narrowing into angry slit. “Excuse me?”
“You don’t need time to think. Say what’s really going through your mind. You’re freaking out and want space so you can talk yourself out of this. You’re getting inside your head, trying to convince yourself that what happened tonight was a mistake.”
“Can you blame me?” She threw her hands up in exasperation. “Past example doesn’t really bode well for us, Parker. We were a disaster!”
My anger exploded at that. “We were fucking perfect!” I yelled.
“How can you say that? After all the pain we went through, how can you possibly think we were perfect?”
“Because those months we were together were the happiest I’ve ever been, and I know it was the same for you. You can’t deny that. I felt it every time we touched. I saw it every time I looked at you.”
“We were dependent on each other.”
“No! We were in love; there’s a fucking difference. I’m not going to stand here and let you downplay that. We loved each other. You’re scared, I get that. Hell, baby, I’m scared, too. But I’m more terrified of what my future’s going to look like if you’re not in it. I never stopped loving you, and you can try to convince yourself otherwise, but you never stopped loving me either. I know you didn’t. That’s what has you so freaked out.”
“Stop,” she pleaded and the agony in her voice broke my heart. I couldn’t keep the distance between us any longer. I had to touch her. Closing the space, I grabbed hold of her face and stared down at her, every ounce of the love I felt for her reflecting in my eyes. I knew she saw it with the way her eyes widened, with the hitch in her breath.
“Fight for us, baby. I’m begging you, please fight for us. Love like ours isn’t something you get more than once in a lifetime. Don’t give up on this.”
She squeezed her eyes closed and her hands came up to wrap around my wrists. For a second fear, took over, fear that she was going to pull away, that she was going to deny what I knew in my heart she felt. But when she opened them and looked at me, really looked at me, I saw the same emotion I had reflecting back at me in those watery, brilliant blue depths and I felt hope. She opened her mouth to speak but was cut off by the shrill ring of a cellphone. I wanted to growl in frustration. I wanted to find whoever it was who had just interrupted us and rip them apart limb from limb.
“What the hell?”
“Ignore it,” I insisted, trying to get her focus back on me.
“Parker, it’s three in the morning. It might be an emergency.” She pulled away from me and began rummaging around on my bedroom floor. She finally located her purse and pulled her phone out, her brows furrowing as she looked at the screen.
“Who is it?”
She shook her head. “I don’t know.” Her finger swiped across the screen and she brought it up to her ear. “Hello…? Yes, I’m Freya.” My chest seized as all the color drained from her face. “What?” she asked on a choked sob before her legs gave out and she collapsed on the bed. I was next to her in an instant, wrapping her in my arms to hold her up as tears began pouring from her eyes.
I took the phone from her hand, ready to kill whoever was on the other line. “Who the fuck is this?” I snarled through the phone. All I could see was red. I wanted to do was reach through the phone and murder the person who’d just hurt her.
The man on the other line stuttered nervously. “I-I’m sorry?”
“Who the fuck is this and what the hell did you just say to Freya?”
“Son, I’m Dr. Varger. I work with Freya’s father.” My stomach plummeted as he spoke. “May I ask who I’m speaking with?”
“P-Parker,” I stumbled, a million worst-case scenarios running through my mind as to why this man was calling in the middle of the night. I looked down at Freya, curled in my embrace as she cried uncontrollably. “I’m her boyfriend. She’s a mess, so what the hell’s going on?”
“Parker, I need you to listen carefully. James had a heart attack earlier tonight—”
“Oh, shit.”
“Son, please. I need you to pay attention. Freya’s going to need you right now.” His words settled inside me. He was right. In the span of a few seconds, Freya had completely broken down. I needed to be there for her.
“Sorry, I’m listening.”
“He was at the hospital when it occurred so they were able to get him help right away…”
That was a good thing. That had to be a good thing, right? Christ, he had to be okay. Freya had already lost her mother. That damn near destroyed her. She couldn’t lose her father, too.
“I-is he going to be okay?”
“He’s stable right now. He’s going to require coronary artery bypass surgery, but he’s strong and in relatively good health. The cardiologist is hopeful he’ll be able make a full recovery.”
I listened for a few more minutes as Dr. Varger went over everything that was about to happen and why. Most of it went right over my head, but I tried my best to absorb everything he was telling me so I could use it to comfort Freya. After disconnecting the call, I wrapped Freya in my arms and tried to soothe her the best I could. She needed a rock through all of this, and I was determined to be that for her.
The next several hours went by in a haze of worry so heavy I felt as though I were moving through a dream, that it wasn’t real. After carrying me back to my apartment, Parker filled Piper and Caleb in on what was happening with my father. Piper wrapped me in a tight hug as I continued to cry silent tears then went about packing my suitcase. Parker and Caleb got online to book me the earliest flight possible back to Washington so I could get to my dad. I didn’t have the energy to fight Parker when he i
nsisted on coming with me. The truth was I kind of needed him. I didn’t want to do this alone, and having Parker with me at least offered me a tiny bit of comfort.
They went about handling everything as I struggled in a fog of fear and sadness. Before I knew it, we were at the airport, getting ready to board the plane that would take me back to the one place I’d never wanted to see again. All my thoughts were on my father. I couldn’t possibly care that I’d once sworn to never step foot in Sommerspoint again. I’d fly to a war-torn, third-world country for my dad it that was what it took. I just needed him to be okay.
I let Parker guide me to where I needed to be, leaning on him, absorbing his strength to get me through. I couldn’t recall the majority of the five-hour flight. I vaguely recalled words like ‘bypass’ and ‘hopeful’ and ‘strong’, but the words that stuck with me the most were ‘bypass surgery’. I knew he was trying to assuage my fears, but all I could think about was some surgeon opening my father’s chest so he could cut into his heart. What if something went wrong? What if the surgeon messed up somehow? What if, what if, what if. The what ifs were what made it hard to breathe.
By the time we touched down in Washington, I was an even bigger mess than when I got the initial phone call. God bless Parker, though. He was my pillar, my rock. I had no clue if I could have made that trip without him. He grabbed our bags and rushed us out of the airport and into a cab, spitting out the name and address of the hospital. At some point during the cab ride, Parker must have texted Dr. Varger that we were on our way, because when the cab pulled up, the well-dressed older man stood outside the hospital entrance, waiting for us.
I had the door open before the cab had a chance to come to a complete stop. “How is he?”
“He’s in recovery, dear. The surgery went very well.” Parker grabbed our bags and we followed my father’s friend through the hospital corridors. Even with that tiny bit of relief, I knew I wouldn’t breathe a full breath until I was able to see my father with my own eyes.
Scattered Colors Page 25
