As the waiter retreated, Shannon turned toward Josh. Although she wanted to pretend nothing had happened, she had to deal with this before it got completely out of hand. Before he kissed her again and made her forget all her good intentions. She didn’t want him getting the wrong idea.
Or, in this case, her mind mocked, the right one. Oh Lord, was she in trouble.
“That wasn’t supposed to happen,” she told him quietly.
He raised his eyes to hers and, suddenly, her stomach felt like a washing machine in the spin cycle.
“Oh?” The single word seemed to call her on her lie. Or was that just her conscience flaring up?
She pressed her lips together. “I’m a little over-wrought, a little up in the air. I think I still have a touch of jet lag and, well, the view up here kind of overwhelmed me….” Her voice trailed off as she silently begged him to understand.
“In other words, you’re not quite yourself?” he suggested.
She grabbed at the excuse. “Right.”
“All right.” Josh nodded complacently. “Then it didn’t happen,” he told her kindly.
It was what she wanted to hear.
And yet…
Oh, God, she couldn’t remember when she felt this confused, this unsure of herself. “Stop being so nice,” she told him. His being like this just made everything that much more difficult for her to set right. And made Robert suffer by comparison.
What comparison? she demanded silently. She wasn’t out shopping, deciding which vehicle to purchase. She’d made her decision. Robert’s ring was on her finger, for heaven’s sake. Why was she waffling?
Josh grinned at her. “Somehow, hitting you upside the head doesn’t quite seem the way to go to me.”
Shannon sighed, closing her eyes for a second. When she opened them again, he was still looking at her. And she felt another strong, almost irresistible urge to kiss him. She put all her energy toward squelching it. “Look, I’m just confused right now.”
“Welcome to the club,” Josh responded. He was only half kidding when he said it.
THE FOLLOWING TWO DAYS, in between unsuccessful attempts to reach Robert, Shannon did her best to lose herself in all the details involved in pulling together Alexis’s wedding and making it everything her sister had ever dreamed of. And in so doing, she tried very hard to forget the effect of that kiss with Josh at the Eiffel Tower. Although the basic groundwork for the wedding had been put down and arranged by her mother’s wonderful and energetic Great-Aunt Celeste, there were so many tiny details to see to.
It seemed to Shannon, on the afternoon of their third day in Paris, that one minicrisis after another kept erupting. Alexis seemed to marshal through it all, but Shannon could tell that her sister’s nerves were beginning to erode. Shannon did her best to prevent that, to meet every emergency as it came up.
However, she found her patience and her ability to always take the high road and find the positive side to everything severely challenged. And it was no small wonder. The pastry chief, Hugh Gautier, who had been flown in at her father’s expense to create the wedding cake, was clashing with Giselle, the chef d’hôtel at Milles Fleurs, who ordinarily ran the inn’s kitchen. The menu for the wedding reception was seriously in jeopardy.
As was the entertainment for the event. It seemed that the band that had been flown from New York to Paris to play at Alexis and Gabe’s wedding had all come down with some mysterious malady that involved spots and close proximity to a bathroom. They were currently in quarantine.
“I have a very splendid record collection,” Great-Aunt Celeste volunteered when apprised of this latest disaster looming over Alexis’s wedding. She and the bridesmaids, as well as the mother of the groom, were all gathered in the inn’s homey sitting room. All male influence was currently banned. “If you promise to be very careful of them,” Celeste said to Alexis, “I can have someone bring my Victrola to the reception.”
Taylor, currently standing behind the impeccably dressed white-haired woman, looked at Shannon and then rolled her eyes heavenward. Alexis covered her face with her hands, turned her body in toward Shannon and quietly sobbed.
“I think she was hoping for live music,” Shannon explained to the older woman.
Celeste spread her delicate hands in a gesture that said the explanation made no sense to her. “Music is always alive. It moves. That is what makes it music.” Her smile brightened as she looked past Shannon and toward the doorway. “Is that not so?”
“Absolutely.”
Shannon turned to see that Josh was standing there. How long had he been there? And why did that even matter to her? Without thinking, her hand went to her hair, smoothing down rebellious waves that had insisted on forming the instant she’d stepped off the plane. But Josh wasn’t looking at her. He was looking at Celeste, and then at Alexis.
“Zack, Antonio and Mario play guitar,” he told the distraught bride-to-be as he took a couple of tentative steps into the all-female gathering. He glanced at Gabe’s mother, and the groom’s sisters, Gina, Brigette, Sophia and Annette, for confirmation. All four nodded. “Angelo plays drums and the other Angelo plays a keyboard.”
“Do they play well, or do they just dabble?” Shannon asked.
Her question was prompted by her experience with Taylor. Her younger sister, over the course of several years, had gone through a number of instruments, swearing that she would take lessons faithfully only to quickly lose interest and move on to something else. There were five different instruments in their basement, including a tuba, to testify to Taylor’s fickleness.
“They’re pretty damn good.” His eyes darted over to the oldest woman in the room. He flashed her an engaging smile. “Sorry.”
Celeste waved her hand and made a dismissive noise. “I have heard much worse, young man.” Making her way over to Josh, Celeste hooked both her arms through his, smiling up at him radiantly. “These young men you have just mentioned, they can play for Alexis’s wedding?”
Josh knew for a fact that, if asked, all five men would jump at the chance. They practiced together with dreams of becoming an actual band someday.
“I’ll go talk to them,” he volunteered, then stopped and looked at Alexis. “If it’s all right with you.”
“Wishes is in quarantine,” Alexis cried, referring to the whimsical name of the band her father had hired for the occasion. “So, yes, it’s all right with me.” She smiled at him gratefully. “It’s terrific with me,” she corrected.
“Great. I’m sure they’d love a chance to ride to the rescue and help you and Gabe out,” he told Alexis. Just before he left the room, he glanced at Shannon.
Great-Aunt Celeste moved closer to her. “Perhaps he will need some help persuading these young men,” Celeste suggested.
The look in Celeste’s eyes said something entirely different as she motioned for her to go after Josh.
Shannon debated for a minute, then gave in. She hurried after Josh.
For the past two days, right after they’d returned from the Eiffel Tower, she’d purposely been avoiding him. But in light of what he’d just done, she felt the need to thank him. Not to say anything to him seemed only rude.
At least, that was the excuse she gave herself.
“You make a habit of that?” Shannon asked, calling after him.
Josh stopped short of the staircase. “A habit of what?”
“Of riding to the rescue.”
His grin was hopelessly engaging. She gave up trying to resist or ignore it.
“Whenever possible,” Josh said. “Unless my horse is in the stable.”
She came up next to him. “I just wanted to add my thanks to Alexis’s. I—we,” she corrected herself, “really appreciate this. If you hadn’t suggested using Gabe’s cousins, I don’t know where we’d find a band for the wedding.”
Josh shrugged off her gratitude. “No thanks needed. Besides, Alexis is almost family.” He saw the puzzled look on her face. “Gabe’s like the broth
er I never had.”
“That’s right, you were an only child,” she said, remembering a conversation they’d had when he tutored her.
His grin widened. “You remembered.”
She nodded. “I envied you being an only child. Especially whenever I had to give in to my sisters.”
“It’s worth the trade-off,” he told her earnestly. “Being an only child can be pretty lonely sometimes.”
“You don’t seem like the type to be lonely.”
He looked at her for a long moment. “I was. Then.”
Shannon wondered if she was going slightly crazy. She could almost swear that she was being caressed by the word.
The way he said it told her he was no longer lonely. And that she might be the reason for the change. Happiness and an edgy panic flashed through her at exactly the same time.
CHAPTER FOUR
THE FIVE FELLINI COUSINS, when finally tracked down and asked, were more than happy to help out Gabe and his future wife when they learned that the original band was in quarantine. Instantly, guitars were produced while the two Angelos, armed with an English/French dictionary, went in search of a keyboard and a drum set to round out the band. Shannon left one of the three remaining cousins with a list of songs that were to be played at the reception.
“One crisis down, seven hundred and thirty-seven to go,” Shannon murmured as she and Josh left the cousins’ room.
Josh followed behind her down the stairs. “That many, huh?”
“All right, maybe just seven hundred and twenty-nine,” she amended with a smile. “At least, right now it seems like that.”
“I think Alexis is very lucky to have someone like you to help handle things for her.”
Shannon stopped at the bottom of the stairs and turned around to face him. He was being so damn nice about everything, it made her feel even guiltier about going to such great lengths to avoid him these past few days. Robert wouldn’t have been nearly as nice or helpful, she caught herself thinking. Unless Robert wasn’t able to get through—which she doubted—he hadn’t even tried to call her back yet.
She’d gone clear across the ocean to France. If she hadn’t left a message on Robert’s cell phone—several messages—he wouldn’t have even known whether or not she had arrived safely.
She could almost hear his voice refuting that: Use your head, Shannon. If anything had happened, I would have heard it on the news.
Logical, always logical. She’d found that reassuring once. The stability, after the chaos of her own family and her parents’ impending divorce, had been comforting. Now, she wasn’t all that sure.
“Look,” she said suddenly. “I haven’t been avoiding you.” Okay, so it was a lie, but just a little white one to spare feelings and involved explanations. “It’s just that things have been so crazy.”
Joshua nodded, his expression unreadable. “I understand.”
Damn it, he was being too nice again. “Okay, I have been avoiding you.”
His smile told her that she’d been forgiven before she’d ever said a word.
“Because things have been so crazy?” He repeated her phrase, except that when he said it, there was a whole different meaning to the words, a private one that had nothing to do with the wedding and everything to do with the turmoil their one kiss had generated between them. Or at least, inside her.
“Yes,” she said quietly. She looked down at her ring, turning it nervously. Taking a deep breath, she said, “I’m engaged.”
“Yes, I know.” Slipping his arm around her waist, he moved her out of the way a second before three of Gabe’s nephews came barreling down the stairs, racing for the front door.
She looked up at Josh, searching for something, but she didn’t know what. Acceptance? Validation? Something to sweep her off her feet to end this agonizing vacillation? Something to help her stick to the promise implied by the engagement ring? “And I love Robert.”
“No point in being engaged if you didn’t,” he agreed amicably.
They moved to an alcove behind the stairs, out of everyone’s way. It felt achingly intimate in that tiny space. Shannon sighed, shaking her head. “Why do your agreements sound like points to debate?”
Josh grinned. “I’m from New York, it’s in the voice.” His eyes were kind when he looked at her. Kind and wildly stirring. She felt herself reacting. “You were head of the debating team, remember?”
She remembered. She remembered more than that. “And you kept your mouth shut.”
Back then, he was always being put down and he had no confidence to stand up for himself. “I was storing up.” He didn’t like talking about those days and changed the subject. “Look, since you’re not avoiding me anymore, how about coming with me to check out a few places?”
Curbing her inclination to say yes immediately, she slid her thumb over the back of her engagement ring, moving the stone forward again. “What kind of places?”
“I’m throwing Gabe a bachelor party tomorrow night and I’m still not sure where to hold it.”
She groaned. “Oh, no. I completely forgot about Alexis’s bachelorette party.”
“Okay, we can make this a double assignment,” Josh said. He pulled a rolled-up paperback from his back pocket and held it out to her. “I’ve got a book here that lists the rowdier nightlife places. And the not-so-rowdy ones,” he added.
Shannon could have kissed him—and then reminded herself where that had led the last time she’d gone with impulse. “You really do like to ride to the rescue, don’t you?”
Taking her hand, he led the way out the front door. “Whenever possible.”
SHANNON SLID bonelessly down into her chair, hardly noticing the charming little outdoor café Josh had brought them to. All she wanted to do was rest.
“Tired?” Josh asked her as he waved over a waitress.
Shannon laughed shortly. She was seven miles beyond tired, past exhausted, on her way to dead.
“I’m not sure if tired is the correct word to use right now.” She tried to sit up, then decided there was no point to it. She wasn’t trying to impress anyone with her good posture. “But I’ve had my fill of seminaked people for a while.”
The waitress stopped short and gave her a deeply quizzical look accompanied by a lopsided smile. Shannon could feel herself blushing. It was getting to be a habit around Josh, she thought.
“She’s a recovering voyeur,” Josh confided to the young woman, who looked clearly in awe of the information. “I’m her psychiatrist and this is actually quite a breakthrough for her. Two coffees, please,” he ordered in the same matter-of-fact tone he’d just used for the diagnosis. He glanced in Shannon’s direction to see if she wanted to change her order. When she said nothing, he nodded at the waitress who slowly meandered back into the café’s interior.
“Recovering voyeur?” Shannon echoed when she finally found her voice.
If she was expecting Josh to look contrite, she was disappointed. He looked as if he was enjoying himself too much.
“The waitress seemed satisfied with that explanation. And I did use the word ‘recovering,’” he reminded her with a grin.
Too tired to take exception, Shannon could only laugh. “God, you certainly have changed from that guy I knew who couldn’t string two words together.”
“I could string them,” Josh contradicted mildly, “but it was always long after everyone had walked away. My mind was a lot slower in those days.” He shrugged carelessly. “Being a broker toughens you up.”
“Apparently,” she murmured. She realized she was staring at his physique and the way the light blue pullover shirt seemed to adhere to his biceps and his pectorals. Shannon forced herself to look away.
The waitress returned with their coffees just then and Shannon cradled her cup between her hands, absorbing the warmth in silence, or at least her own silence. The street before them was alive with the noise of life and passing cars.
After a few minutes, Josh asked, “See anything yo
u like?”
The question startled her. She’d been lost in her own thoughts. Thoughts that she was not about to share. Shannon coughed and cleared her throat, then looked in his direction. “Excuse me?”
“The clubs,” he explained. “Did any of them strike you as being right for Alexis’s bachelorette party?”
“The second place we saw, I suppose. Chez Charles. The restaurant looked nice,” she added as an afterthought.
Josh suppressed a laugh, but not his comment. “I don’t think that anyone at this party is going to be soaking in the ambience or noticing what color the walls are painted. Or even what’s being served—on their plates,” he added drolly.
Shannon felt her mouth curving despite herself. The topic wasn’t the kind she ordinary discussed with a man, not even Robert. Yet somehow, she felt strangely comfortable with the man she was sitting across from. Which seemed odd since, apart from a stack of shared precalculus papers and a handful of quizzes and tests he’d helped coach her through, she and Josh were relative strangers.
She looked down at her coffee. “No, I guess you have a point.”
“Let’s say I buy you a very late lunch and then we go back and make arrangements?”
Shannon nodded. “Sounds good to me.” Especially since it gave her an excuse to spend a little more time with Josh under the guise of helping with Alexis’s wedding.
IT WAS ANOTHER TWO HOURS before they finally arrived back at the inn. Rather than go through the sitting area, she and Josh took the back stairs. She didn’t want anyone taking note of when she got in or who she’d come in with. Everything, she insisted to herself, was perfectly innocent, but that wouldn’t stop Taylor from asking questions or Great-Aunt Celeste, who saw romance everywhere, from giving her a knowing smile.
The last thing she wanted aimed in her direction was a knowing smile.
“See you later,” Josh said, walking her to her door. He resisted the temptation to kiss her, a temptation that he noted was unnervingly strong. He backed away as she closed the door.
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