Cici Reno #MiddleSchoolMatchmaker

by Kristina Springer

  I’m wearing a silver glittery sweater dress with tights and my favorite boots that have a good inch and a half heel. Mom won’t let me get real heels yet. She thinks heels are stupid and doesn’t get why women torture themselves in them. She says if they want their calves to look good, then they should exercise more. Aggie helped me curl my hair, and it actually looks really good. I should have asked her to help me with it long ago.

  Aggie looks great tonight too. She’s wearing a pink deco tulle dress, and it looks adorable on her. I tweeted out a picture of us at my house before we left with the message:

  Cici Reno @yogagirl4evr • 24m

  About to get our dance on! #AWMS #dance #BFFs #soexcited

  In a Twitter message after Wednesday night’s volleyball game, Drew asked her, AKA me/SeraFrosted, to go to the dance with him, but I said no. I didn’t do it meanly or anything. I just reminded him that my mom won’t let me date yet and she would consider that technically a date. I told him I was going with my girl friends and would see him there though.

  I talked to Aggie after the volleyball game too, to get the scoop on her and Drew’s relationship and if there was one on again. I told her I would step aside if she had changed her mind, but she just laughed and said no. She was only being nice to him. Drew is such a nice guy, so I can see that she wouldn’t ignore him or anything. I didn’t tell her all the stuff he had said about their relationship working out after all. I still have to figure out what to do about that.

  Luke wanders away from us to look for his friends, and Aggie and I head straight for the gym. We push through the heavy wooden doors, and the gym looks amazing. The theme is “Starry Night,” and there are lines of twinkle lights woven back and forth through the wooden ceiling beams across the entire gym. Suspended from the light strands are various sizes of white and silver stars hanging from different lengths of string. The floor is covered in white and silver balloons, and Aggie and I kick them away as we enter.

  “It’s so magical!” I say.

  “Look! A DJ!” Aggie says, pointing at what looks like a high school boy standing behind a silver cloth covered–table full of equipment and a couple of laptops.

  “Ooh, and look over there.” I point to a black backdrop covered in stars, with a big round moon hanging from a string in front of it. “I think that’s for taking pictures.”

  “Maybe you can take a picture with Drew,” Aggie suggests with a sly grin.

  I raise my eyebrows and shrug. While that would be completely wonderful, I don’t see it happening. Still, I find myself scanning the whole room, hoping to catch a glimpse of him. I wonder what he’s wearing tonight.

  “Cici, Aggie!” London calls to us over the music. We turn and see her, Emma, Madison, and Alexa headed our way.

  “Let’s get a picture together,” Emma says.

  We make our way over to the backdrop and pose with our arms draped around each other’s shoulders, and the mom playing photographer for the evening takes our picture.

  After the photo, London becomes super-serious all of a sudden. “You guys, I need your help tonight. You have to warn me if you see Adam with her. I just, I can’t bear seeing them with their arms all over each other or anything.”

  “Aw, Lon,” I say. “Of course we will,” and the others nod. London has been recovering slowly from her heartbreak, and I can imagine it would be devastating to see Adam with Katie. Rumor has it, they’re an official couple now.

  “Oh my gosh, you guys, look!” Aggie squeals. Our gaze follows to where she’s pointing. “It’s Mr. Adwell dancing with Mrs. Stoll, the librarian!”

  It’s true. They’re both bopping and swinging around, not at all to the beat of the music, but they’re smiling so much, I don’t think they care.

  “They shouldn’t have all the fun. Let’s go!” Alexa says. She grabs my hand and pulls me toward the dance floor. I grab Aggie, and she grabs London, and so on, and we chain our way to the middle of the dance floor.

  We’re having so much fun dancing like crazy. We’re spinning in circles and laughing and taking turns dipping each other and I’m getting totally sweaty. Thankfully, a slow song comes on, and I motion to Aggie that we should go get something to drink. We head for the gymnasium doors and we’re almost out to the hallway, when Aggie suddenly stops. I turn to see what halted her, and I see Drew take her hand in his. He’s pulling her toward the dance floor. Aggie looks at me and shrugs like ”what can I do?“ as she lets him pull her back to the center of the gym.

  I can feel my breath catch as I watch him put his hands around her waist and see her rest her hands on his shoulders. They’re swaying in time to the music and my heart is beating so hard I can feel it in my ears. That should be me out there with Drew, not Aggie.

  He smiles down at her, not taking his eyes off of her for a second, even though I can see Luke and the other boys hooting and laughing off at the side of the gym. Drew couldn’t care less though. His attention is 100 percent on Aggie.

  My brain is telling me to stop staring at them. To go on, leave the gym, and take a break. Get a drink of water and let the blood drain from my face and visit the other parts of my body. But my legs are saying no, stay here. Torso needs help holding up this heart that’s being torn in two.

  And then the worst thing imaginable happens. Despite the loud chaotic gym, all the kids dancing, the boys in the corner making a ruckus, despite it all, Drew leans down and kisses Aggie. On the lips.

  25

  I feel sick.

  I turn, stumbling for the door, and run out of the gym, down the hall, and out of the school into the cool night. I bend over at the bike rack, grabbing the metal bar, coughing and spitting, waiting to throw up. My chest is tight, and it’s difficult to breathe. I’m feeling dizzy like I could pass out right on this spot. The air is hitting my arms and the back of my neck, everywhere I was just sweating from dancing, making me cold. And my cheeks. I reach up and touch my cheeks. I’m crying.

  I can’t believe she kissed him. That he kissed her. My Drew. Aggie and Drew kissed. I can hardly make sense of it. I squat down and try to even out my breath. I need to calm down, but I can’t stop crying.

  “Cici?” Aggie calls from the school door.

  I straighten up, quickly wiping my eyes and cheeks with the back of my hands. I don’t want her to see me like this.

  “Cici, are you out here?” she says.

  Maybe if I don’t say anything she won’t see me and will go back inside.

  “There you are,” she says, and I hear her jogging toward me.

  “Cici, look at me. Turn around,” Aggie urges.

  I shake my head no, not sure I can speak yet.

  “Hey, are you mad? You’re not mad at me, right? That wasn’t my fault. I didn’t know he was going to kiss me. He just did it. It’s not like I kissed him back.” She pauses. “If anything, I made a bit of a scene. I sorta pushed him away from me and told him he shouldn’t have done that. I left him standing alone on the dance floor.”

  I turn and face her. Her eyes are wide, and she’s hugging her arms tightly together.

  “He probably thinks I’m a jerk now,” Aggie says.

  “No, he doesn’t,” I say, almost in a whisper. “He likes you, Aggie. And it’s okay if you like him too. You liked him first. It’s fine. I don’t even know why I’m crying.”

  Aggie’s jaw drops open and she just stares at me, shocked. “Cici,” she begins, her voice low and quivering a bit now. But not like she’s about to cry, more like she’s … mad. “You’re right. I did like him first. So why are you trying to make me feel bad?” she asks.

  “So you do like him?” I say accusingly. “Never mind. It’s fine. I’ll be fine. You guys make a great-looking couple.”

  “Yes, I mean, no. I mean, argh!” she says, angrily. “You’re getting me all confused, Cici. Drew’s nice. I like him as a person. He’s the first boy at this stupid school not ogling me or making dumb jokes every time I walk into a room. And I like that he talks
to me and not my boobs. That he’s interested in hearing what I have to say. Yes, I like that, I like all of that.”

  She’s yelling at me now. I glance at the door to see if anyone is coming out, but no one is. We’re all alone outside.

  “Yeah, I like Drew. I do. Just not in the way you’re thinking. And he doesn’t like me, Cici. He likes you. He just doesn’t know it yet.” She shakes her head, looking disgusted.

  I swallow hard, not sure how to respond.

  Aggie continues, not done yelling at me yet. “How am I supposed to feel when after one summer away I come back and everyone is treating me differently? Boys are giggling and staring at my chest. Girls are whispering nasty names under their breath when I walk by. And what did I do to deserve this? Drink too much milk? Hit a growth spurt? Even you act like I’m suddenly a different person just because I look a little different. When did I stop being Aggie and become an object?”

  She kicks the ground and mutters, “At least in volleyball I can pull on two sports bras and stick out a little bit less.”

  “Two?” I ask. “Not the point, Cici,” Aggie says, annoyed.

  She’s right. I’ve been just as awful as everyone else at school and I was supposed to be helping her.

  “Oh, Aggie,” I say, “I’m so sorry. You’re right. I haven’t been a very good friend. I was totally wrong.” I think back to what Claire had said that day at yoga. That best friends are hard to come by, but there will be many boys in my lifetime. I don’t know if any of them will ever be like Drew but at this time, I’ve got to choose my friend. “In fact,” I tell her, “I’m not going to talk to him either. I’ll message him and tell him we can’t talk anymore. That will end all of this. We’re breaking up … whatever all of this has been.”

  She thinks about this. “Really?” she asks. “Are you sure?”

  “I’m sure,” I reply quickly before I can change my mind. “Can we just forget about all of it? Put it behind us?”

  Aggie looks up in the air like she’s thinking and then her face softens. “Yeah,” she finally says. “Can we call your mom to pick us up, though? I don’t want to go back in the gym. It’s too awkward.”

  I nod. “Let’s wait inside.” I put an arm around her shoulder, and we head for the door.

  26

  Why did you run out like that?

  I felt so stupid standing there. All the guys were laughing at me.

  What’s with your last message? What do you mean you can’t talk to me anymore?

  Are you really not going to respond?

  Helloooooooooo?

  Is it because I kissed you?

  I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.

  Did I embarrass you?

  Answer me, PLEASE.

  Aggie?

  That was the last message. It came in sometime around midnight, but I had already gone to sleep. Drew hasn’t sent me any more messages. I think he’s finally given up. I’ve reread these probably fifty times, but it doesn’t change anything. It’s over. I made my decision and I’m not going to talk to him again.

  There’s a knock at my bedroom door, and I quickly shut down Twitter. “Yes?”

  “It’s me,” Mom calls.

  “Come in.”

  “Everything okay, hon? You’ve been pretty mopey since you got home last night. Want to talk?”

  “I’ll be okay.” I cross the room to my bed and plop down onto it.

  Mom takes a seat next to me. “You and Aggie got into a fight, huh?”

  I nod. “Everything’s okay now. I guess I’m just still feeling a little sad about it, that’s all.”

  Mom puts an arm around me and squeezes. “I used to hate fighting with friends when I was your age. It always felt like the end of the world. Like I couldn’t see through the fight to the next day or week, you know? They were always this huge, overshadowing thing. But you know what, things always got better. It’s okay to feel sad about it. Just know that you and Aggie will be fine, I promise.”

  “I hope so.”

  “Tell you what,” Mom says, “let’s cheer you up. How about a girls’ day? We can go out for lunch, maybe shop a bit? Let’s get out of the house. Dad’s taking the boys to a movie, and I’m not going into the studio until late this afternoon. What do you say?”

  “The boys?” I ask.

  “Yeah, Drew’s over. He looks like he had a hard night too. How rough have middle school dances gotten anyway?” Mom says, heading for the door.

  Oh man. I have to get out of here before Drew sees me. “Lunch and shopping would be perfect, Mom. Give me five minutes to get ready and we’ll go.”

  “Great,” Mom says. “I knew that would perk you up. And I need new boots, so that will perk me up too.” She laughs. “Ok, see you in a few,” she says, closing the door behind her.

  I look at myself in the full-length mirror on the back of my door. I’m a mess. I rip off my old sweatpants and tee shirt and pull on a sweater and jeans. I brush my hair quickly and pull it up into a loose ponytail. I’m dabbing on lip gloss when there’s a knock at my door again.

  “Hold on, Mom,” I yell. “Almost ready.”

  The door cracks open and Drew pops his head in. “I’m not your mom,” he says. “Can I come in for a minute? I need to talk to you.”

  I’m frozen in place, lip gloss still in midair, totally freaking out. “Um, uh,” I stammer, “yeah, sure. Come in.”

  Drew slips into my room, closing the door behind him. I can’t believe this is really happening. That Drew Lancaster is in my room right now, just inches away.

  “Um, what’s up?” I ask him, backing away. I take a seat at my desk.

  Drew nervously paces around my room. “Well,” he begins and then pauses, hesitating. “I’m not sure how much you know.” He stops pacing. “It’s about Aggie.”

  I nod. “Yeah, Aggie. I do know about that.”

  “So you know that she’s not talking to me anymore. That she doesn’t want anything to do with me apparently. Only thing is, I don’t know why. What did I do to suddenly make her so mad?”

  This is so, so hard. Drew looks really hurt. I hate that I’m the reason he looks like this. “I’m sure you didn’t do anything,” I say quickly. “And I don’t think she’s mad. Not at all.”

  “She has to be,” he says. “She wants nothing to do with me. I must have done something.”

  “No, it’s not you, it’s her,” I say. That sounds so lame, like I got it off a TV drama or something. “I mean, Aggie’s just not ready to date yet. Not anybody. It’s nothing to do with you specifically. And she’s really into volleyball right now and I think she just wants to concentrate on that, you know, with no distractions.”

  “Maybe I was coming on too strong. But I could have pulled back. It’s not like we had to date, date. Honestly, I was happy just talking to her everyday online.”

  I smile and a tingly sensation shoots through me, right to my toes. He does like talking to me.

  “Do you think you could try talking to her again for me? Maybe tell her I’m sorry and can we just be friends?” he asks. He looks so hopeful.

  I sigh. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Drew. She was pretty definite about this. I don’t think talking to her will change things. No, I think the best thing you could do is let it be. Just move on and forget about her. Maybe …” I stop talking. Drew’s not exactly paying attention to me. “Drew?” I ask.

  Drew’s eyebrows are furrowed and he’s looking around my room, frowning. I follow his gaze from the laptop on my desk and the vampire gnome statue on my bookshelf to the pictures of The Stall all over my walls, from the light-up Yoda bank on my nightstand to my new Minecraft torch hanging up over my bed, and finally resting on my window, specifically on book five of The Last Token, tucked in between the screen and the glass.

  Oh no.

  Drew points his index finger at me and then pulls it back, biting his thumb. He drops his hand to his side and shakes his head. He looks like he’s going to say someth
ing and then swallows hard. He turns toward my bedroom door.

  “I—” I begin and stop. I have no clue what to say.

  Drew whirls back around, angry now. “I’ve been talking to you this whole time?” he asks.

  “Uh,” is all I can get out so I give him a tiny nod.

  “So, what,” he says, sounding furious now, “you and Aggie were playing some kind of joke on me? Making fun of me?”

  “No,” I reply quickly.

  Drew just stares at me. He’s so, so mad. But I can also see his eyes welling up and his jaw stiffen, like he’s fighting to hold back tears.

  I feel numb and lost. I don’t know what I can say right now that will make any of this better.

  “Well, I hope you two had a good laugh,” he says quietly, before storming out of my room.

  In all of that time of plotting and planning I never imagined this would happen. What did I do? My head falls into my hands. I think I’m in shock.

  A second later, Luke is angrily stomping through my door and yelling, “What did you say to Drew to make him tear out of here like that?”

  Luke is glaring at me, and I’m completely frozen. I can’t respond.

  This is so, so bad.

  27

  I threw up. Twice. And then I went shopping with Mom. I don’t know how I got through it. I was basically robotic. I barely spoke a word. And I couldn’t eat a thing at lunch. Mom’s freaked out. She said she doesn’t understand how I got more upset in the span of five minutes. But she doesn’t know that in those five minutes I ruined absolutely everything. Drew hates me.

  Mom drags me to yoga with her, and I don’t put up a fight. Time to myself, an hour not having to talk to anyone or think about anything might be useful. Or I could become an even bigger mess.

  “We’re going to slowly move into Pigeon,” Mom says in a soothing voice, slowly bringing the class to the end of our session. “Bring your right knee up the mat in front of you and put your toes of your right foot in front of your left knee. Find comfort in the uncomfortableness of this position.”