by Bill Day
He fixes me with eyes that gleam with passion. “That’s love, Monty. What’s your story?
I tell Enrico my story: the rip, the deal I made with Sonia, the rescue, Giovanni and the ring - all of it. By the end of my story, Enrico’s eyes are gleaming and he is laughing gently.
“Ah, just like her mother. She wants you Monty and there is nothing you or I can do about it. So be it. Welcome to the family son. But Monty, you look after her. If you look after her the family will look after you. If you treat her bad the family will look after you as well. You understand?”
I smile. “Giovanni said the same thing.”
“Giovanni is a good man, solid.”
Arms slide seductively over my shoulders. Sonia whispers, “That was beautiful Monty. I love you too.” I sense a setup.
“Congratulations Son!” Brian and Celia approach from the kitchen. I stare; it’s like the bloody phone call from Paraguay all over again. My parents are sneaky bastards. But I think so is my fiancée.
Celia descends on Sonia. “Let's go get a coffee and leave these gorillas to themselves.” They walk off holding hands.
I look at Brian and Enrico. “You both knew! You bastards.”
Enrico and Brian chuckle, “Mary phoned me straight away. She sent me a link to the video. Monty, you went out of your depth. After that you were hers.” He shrugs, pulls out another glass from a Gladstone bag by his feet, and pours three drinks.
“To a joyful and prosperous union - salute.”
We down another drink. It will be a long night.
29
Rescuing Rebecca - The Call
I wake to an insistent prodding. My head pounds. Sonia punches me on the back.
“Lucky wants you. Monty, your place is a mess.”
I look around. It is a mess. I’ve never noticed it. “Someone used to clean it, wash linen, even leave food sometimes but they must have stopped.”
Sonia looks at me like I have two heads. “That was Mandy, you imbecile. She doted on you.”
I feel a little embarrassed. “I never knew.”
“You need to wake up Monty. Stuff happens around you and you don’t see it. Anyhow, Lucky said to meet him in the basement so - scoot.”
I grab a bottle of water and some aspirin. I give Sonia a huge kiss and head down to the basement. Lucky sits with Flick, Fingers, Gail, and Frankie.
“Monty, you’re late. We are here to discuss a problem.”
I nod and try to be attentive. My head pounds from the effects of Enrico’s grappa.
“You all know that Rebecca escorted Mike and his circus on their recent trek. They are settled on our farm down South. She stayed there to keep an eye on them and has sent some disturbing reports back. It seems Attis picked up several very young runaways on his travels and he is more than a little fond of them. Young runaways have concerned parents. It’s only a matter of time before these concerned parents find their children living with Mike and his fruit-loops. So, a police raid and media shit-storm are coming. We can’t be associated with that. Added to that, Rebecca has dropped off the radar. Nobody has heard from her in weeks. Anything to add Frankie?”
“I want her back Lucky. You sent her with those nut-jobs so she’s your responsibility. Whoever you send, I’m coming and I want Flick with me.”
Flick looks contemplative, “I’m getting too slow Frankie. Gail is up to it.” Frankie’s eyes narrow. She looks Gail over and nods her assent.
“We will get her back Frankie but you stay here, that’s not negotiable. It turns out Mike is indeed barking mad. Monty, don’t you dare say I told you so. So Monty, Fingers, and Gail will to go down and sort it out.”
Frankie folds her arms, “If I have to stay then I want Flick to go.” She turns to Flick. “She knows and respects you Flick, please bring her back.” Felicity nods.
“Okay people. Get yourself sorted to set out tomorrow. Monty, can you stay for a second please.”
The others file out the door. Lucky turns to me. “Monty, this venture may get messy. I thought I’d give you a chance to back out. Someone else can drive.”
“Lucky, if I back away when things get messy then I am no use to you. Then what do I do? Go back on the dole? If there’s a job to do then I will see it done.”
“Good man Monty. Go get ready. Oh, if Sonia insists on going along don’t fight her over it. She will get her way regardless and her skills may be handy.”
I wonder what skills Lucky refers to.
The next day we are all waiting at the front of the building. There is a bit of gear to stow so I am driving the minibus for this trip. Flick, Gail, Sonia, and I are waiting for Fingers. Five minutes go by. I see Fingers ambling up the path. He has Helen and Trotsky with him.
“Fingers not the dogs. Please don’t bring the dogs.”
“Monty, you and I will be away. I won’t leave them alone.” Fingers can be rather frustrating.
Gail pats the seat next to her and both dogs leap into the bus. Apparently, the dog discussion is over. Helen sits up front and Trotsky leaps over the front seat and sits next to Sonia. She scratches his muzzle and he collapses in delight. This is going to be an interesting trip.
We drive out the front gate and down the street. There is an insistent ping noise coming from the car.
Fingers looks around. “What’s that bloody noise? Monty, stop that pinging.”
“It’s not me Fingers. The car detects the dogs on the seats and wants the seat belts fastened. Clip their seat-belts.” Fingers undoes his seat-belt and clips Helen and Trotsky’s.
“Monty, it hasn’t worked. I can still hear pinging.”
“Fingers, sit down.”
“No Monty. I can still hear pinging. Can you stop the pinging?”
“Sit down and put on your seatbelt Fingers!”
Sonia undoes her seatbelt and shoves Fingers back to his seat. She clips his seatbelt closed.
“I can still hear it, Monty!”
“Sonia, sit down and put your seat-belt on.”
She shoots me an icy glare. “I beg your pardon, Monty?”
“Uh, Sonia, can you please sit and clip so the noise stops. It is upsetting Fingers.”
“I’m not senile Monty. It is not upsetting me. I just don’t like it.”
Sonia sits and clips her seat belt. The noise stops. Trotsky stands, scratches his left ear, and jumps over to the seat behind.”
“Monty, that pinging is back.”
“It’s Trotsky. He’s moved seats. Flick, can you try to get him to jump back.”
“I prefer you call me Felicity.”
“Christ Felicity, can you just try to move him.”
“Do you mind Monty? You’re talking to my mother. You need a slap.”
In support of Gail, Sonia leans forward and slaps me on the back of the head.
“Monty, Trotsky seems reluctant to move.”
“Felicity, can you do the seat belt up?”
“He’s sitting on it, Monty.”
“Can you sort of slide your hand under?”
“Under the dog’s bum? Really Monty?”
“Okay, okay. I’ll pull over and fix it. I stop the bus and slide open the back door. Helen jumps out.
“No! Helen come here!”
Sonia follows me. “Isn’t she deaf Monty?”
“Oh shit, shit, shit.” I stand on the street verge with my hand upright. Helen looks at me then sniffs a nearby bush. Trotsky spies Helen and figures she has found food. He leaps for the door. I slide the door shut just in time. He jams his head out through the open sliding window and pushes with all his might. He makes strangulated coughing noises. A guy walks along the pavement. He stops and looks aghast.
“That’s no way to treat a dog mate! What’s the matter with you?”
“Yeah, yeah, mate. Piss off and let me deal with it.” I realise straight away my tone was not well chosen. The tall and muscle-bound gentleman turns and walks towards me.
“What did you say to me mate?
You should look after your dog. That window is strangling him.”
Sonia steps towards him and smiles. “No need to get upset my friend. The dog is fine.”
He pushes past her and fronts me. This is a mistake. Sonia moves like a snake and throws him on his back. She stands over him.
“The wasn’t wise. Now, you better stay down for a bit. When I say so, you will get up and piss off.”
He tries to get to his feet. Sonia just flicks her ankle into him and he slams back to the ground.
“You’re not listening. Stay down until I say otherwise. Do you understand?”
He nods.
“All right. Well done. Now, get up and piss off.” The tall and muscle-bound gentleman clips down the road and doesn’t look back. Sonia climbs back on the bus. Trotsky takes advantage of this opportunity and runs to join Helen. I jump in the bus and clip all the vacant seatbelts.
I jump back out and walk over with the dog leads in my hand. Trots and Helen take one look at me, turn, and sprint down the street. I leap into the van and follow the little bastards.
“Monty it’s pinging again!”
“Who hasn’t got their seatbelt done up? Everyone checks their seat-belts.”
“Monty, that pinging makes me angry.”
“Okay Fingers.” I raise my voice. “Who hasn’t got their belt done up! Ok, check your belts and sound off. Gail?”
“Check.”
“Felicity?”
“My seatbelt is fastened, Monty.”
“Fingers.” - a long pause. “Fingers!” - a longer pause. “FINGERS!”
“I can’t hear you over the pinging Monty.”
Sonia checks Fingers belt. “Check for Fingers.”
“Sonia.”
“Check Monty - obviously.”
“It’s still pinging. Can everybody check again?”
Have you checked yours, Monty?”
“What was that Sonia?”
“Have you checked your seat-belt, Monty?”
I clip up my seat belt and the pinging stops. My passengers groan.
The dogs jog along just ahead of us. We follow them at a crawl. Drivers behind begin to honk in frustration. Fingers sticks his head out the window and hurls a tin of tomato soup. “Shut up that honking you fuckers!”
I hate this road trip and we have only gone 5 miles. “Why did you have a can of soup in your pocket Fingers?”
“Ammunition Gail, obviously.”
I pull over before Fingers hurls more canned goods. “Everyone out and help. We need the dogs back.”
Fingers walk a few steps towards the dogs and holds his hand up. They freeze and sit. He twirls his hand and points to the bus. They sprint over, jump in, and act like model citizens.
“See Monty. You only had to ask.”
“Yes, thank you for pointing that out Sonia.”
“My pleasure. Can we go now?”
We all climb back in and set off. We hit the highway and head South. It’s going to be a long trip.
30
Rescuing Rebecca - The Journey
We hit the open road. Everyone appears settled. The earlier tension flows away and we begin to talk.
“So, what will we do when we get there?”
Fingers replies, “We can stop for lunch and talk about it. There is a roadhouse five miles up Monty. Pull in there.”
We come up to the roadhouse. The building lacks character. It is too modern to be quaint. It is too old to be inviting. It is tired and poorly maintained - a relic from the late 1970s. Everyone piles out of the van and leaves me to fuel up. As I pump fuel I can hear Trotsky and Helen thumping around inside the bus. Two dog faces press against the rear exit door but I ignore them.
I pump the fuel and walk inside. The interior is tired and not quite clean. A thin, greasy looking lad sits behind the counter.
He watches me as I approach. “Yes?”
“Just the diesel thanks.”
“Anything else?”
“No, just the diesel.”
“Do you want a Kit-Kat? They’re two for the price of one.”
“No, I will just pay for the diesel. I will have lunch and pay for that separately.”
He squints and processes this new information. “Do you want any drinks?”
“Um, no. Just the diesel.”
“That’s $165.50. Cash or card?
“I think card.”
“Our card reader is out.”
“Okay, I’ll pay cash.” I hand him two, one hundred-dollar bills. He stares at them for a few seconds and looks at me.
“I don’t have change. Do you have the right money?”
“No change? Are you serious?”
“Everyone pays by card.”
“But your card reader is out.”
He shrugs.
“Look can I pay after lunch then?”
“I’ve already rung it up.”
I force a smile on my face, “Can you unring it?”
His eyes radiate confusion, “I will have to ring the boss.” He reaches for the phone and dials, “Sorry mate. He’s not answering.”
Just then Felicity walks up to the counter. “Excuse me, please may I have the toilet key?”
He throws a key on the counter. It is attached to an eight-inch chunk of pinewood with “Ladies” scrawled in black marker. The wood is dirty and greasy. Dark stains enhance its foulness. Felicity’s mouth drops open and she stares at it for a good twenty seconds. She snaps three paper towels from a dispenser, wraps them around the key, and stomps off.
I seize the initiative. “Look mate, I haven’t got anything smaller. Just throw in a bunch of chips and stuff to make up the balance.”
He pauses, brow furrowed in concentration. “Do you want some Kit-Kats? They’re two for the price of one.”
The door swings open and Felicity returns. Her mouth is a thin line of fury. “When was that restroom last cleaned? I wouldn’t let a farmyard pig shit in there. It’s fucking disgusting.” She throws the key back on the counter.
I never heard Flick swear before.
She shouts into the greasy dining hall. “In the bus everyone! I wouldn’t let the dogs eat here.” She claps her hands. “Come on. Let’s go.” Without question, everyone gets up and files out the door.
Sonia sidles up to me, “Try to buy some packet food, Monty. I’m bloody starving.”
I turn back to the counter and sigh, “Yeah mate, give me five Kit Kats to start.” He counts ten Kit Kats onto the counter.
I sigh. “Can I have just five?”
“That’s odd.”
“What’s odd about it?”
“Five is odd. You can’t have five.” He shakes his head as if talking to a moron.
“Okay, can I have six?”
“Sure, whatever.” He slaps another two on the counter. Now there are twelve.
“Ah yes, can I have three then?” He lays another six Kit Kats. Now I have eighteen of the bloody things.
“No, I just want three.”
“Are you listening, Mate. You can’t have three. It’s odd.”
I fight down my irritation. “My good man, will you please put just six Kit Kats on the counter?” He takes away twelve Kit Kats. “That’s what I want to buy.”
“Okay, you want to buy three Kit Kats, taking advantage of the two for one offer. So, you end up with six.”
“Precisely.”
He shrugs his shoulders and mutters to himself. I walk around the display racks and grab packets of potato chips, beef jerky, nuts, and various lollies. I walk to the fridges and grab iced coffee, chocolate milk, and a range of soft drinks. I walk back and dump them all on the counter. Thin and greasy scans them.
“That will be $205.75.”
“And, to be clear, you can’t change three hundreds?”
He just stares at me. I give back a packet of beef jerky and one of the Kit Kats. “How much now?”
“I need another Kit Kat.”
“You need another Kit Kat?”<
br />
“We are selling them in pairs. You can’t give back just one Kit Kat.”
“Fine.” I throw him another Kit Kat. “How much now?” He starts to scan everything from scratch. Shit.
The door swings open. Sonia strolls in. She warms the room like sun through a kitchen window. Greasy stares at her with his mouth open.
She smiles, “What’s the holdup, Monty?”
I explain the situation as best I can. She takes my handful of cash and turns to Greasy. She peels off $200 and adds $50 from her pocket.
“That’ll cover it, let's go.”
“I have to scan it all again.”
She smiles at the hapless attendant. “No, you don’t.” She leans over the counter. His eyes open wide and sweat breaks out on his forehead. “Just push this button to retrieve the information, then that one. There. All done. Keep the change.”
She turns to me, “Mary taught me that trick. It’s like shooting fish in a barrel. Guys are so lame. Let’s go, I’m hungry.”
We climb on the bus. The others sit ready to take off. Fingers has the dogs on leads. He is walking them around a nearby paddock. He walks them back and looks at me accusingly. “You left Trotsky and Helen in the bus Monty. They chewed your hat.”
Bloody dogs.
Fingers, Helen, and Trotsky jump in the bus. I start up and drive away. We find a nice picnic area just down the road, pull over, and eat. I give Trots and Helen the biltong.
Fingers draws a map of our destination on the sand. He speaks through a mouthful of potato chips. “We have a contact at Mike’s temple. Rebecca is locked down in this small room. She isn’t a prisoner but neither can she leave. Mike suspects she’s there to spy and he has things to hide. There is a garage here. Our van is locked in it. This larger building is a rammed earth shack. It has electricity, running water, and a spa. That’s where Mike hangs out. He does a lot of entertaining in the spa. Monty, you will be with me. Our job is to strip all the I.D. out of the van and clean it up - no prints. It’s not worth salvaging but we don’t want it traced back to us. After that, we will be free to support whoever needs us. If it all looks good, we’ll stand by with the bus and be ready to high-tail it when you all to show up.”
