by Kathy Kacer
On and on they walked, moving deeper into the cemetery. They finally rounded one more turn and there it was, right in front of them. The white stone read Karen Frankel, 1925–1946. There was some German writing engraved below the name.
“What does it say?” Sara was breathless, barely able to get the question out.
“It says Beloved Daughter, Wife and”—Peter paused and looked up—“Mother.”
The word mother took Sara’s breath away again. Her mother lay here in the earth—just bones and dust now. But Sara felt close to her for the first time in her life. As she stood and stared at the grave, she was suddenly aware that Peter had come up behind her and once again slipped his arm around her shoulders.
“It’s so hard to explain why I needed to come here,” Sara finally said.
“People usually don’t need a reason to visit a grave. They come to pay their respects and to remember.”
“But that’s just it. I have no memories of her, just things I’ve invented, or the few things that people like Frau Kaufmann and Dr. Pearlman have told me.” She still couldn’t call him grandfather. “Those are their memories, not mine.”
They stood in silence for a few moments, and then Sara began to talk again.
“But it is pretty here,” she said, looking up at the trees that hung protectively over the gravestones and squinting at the sun that was peeking through the taller branches. “I guess I’m grateful that she’s here in this peaceful place.”
Sara could feel a sense of calm and peace moving throughout her body. It was as if all the anxiety, irritation, insecurity and uncertainty of her life was being released as she stood here. Her arms rested at her sides. Her hands were still. This was a new feeling, a good feeling. She wanted it to last.
“I wish I had some flowers to put on her grave.” Tears flowed freely down Sara’s cheeks now, and she did not try to stop them.
Peter looked around and picked up a small round stone. “Jews don’t usually bring flowers to a cemetery,” he said. “Instead, we place stones on a grave.”
Sara paused. “It seems so harsh.” Flowers would have been so much nicer, so much prettier, she thought.
“Well, flowers disappear quickly. The belief is that stones last forever, just like the memory you hold of the one who has died.” Peter held the stone out to Sara.
She took it, turning it over in her hand. Then she approached the grave and laid the stone on top of the marker, letting her hand rest there for a moment. She liked this custom. Perhaps she had no old memories of her mother, but starting right now, she could create a new memory of this moment, one that would last into the future. Then she stepped back and stared at her mother’s grave.
Everything was becoming clearer to her. Yes, she would carry the man who had raped her mother somewhere inside of her. Every time she looked into a mirror, stared at her blue eyes, she would be reminded of her roots. But she knew now that she was not him, and never would be. She would live her life trying to prove that. And she would start by fulfilling her mother’s destiny. She would become the designer her mother had never been able to become. She would study—somehow, somewhere—and she would keep the pact that she had made with Dot.
The question What now? had been raging in Sara’s head for the last couple of days. But she was startled to realize that she was experiencing an odd sense of belonging here, as if in standing at her mother’s grave she suddenly sensed that Germany was a place where she might fit in—more than she had ever fit in at the orphanage. Perhaps her destiny was here, if only for the next little while. She had a grandfather—a blood relative—with whom she needed to try to create a relationship. And then there was Peter. Was there something there? Perhaps. It was definitely worth staying and seeing what would happen.
Sara’s brain was in overdrive. She had some money left to live on—what was left of her nest egg. Maybe some of it might even go to helping support the upkeep of this cemetery and her mother’s grave. She would need to talk to Peter about that.
Frau Klein might be able to use her help at the inn in exchange for room and board. Peter had said that the inn would get a lot busier as summer approached, and Sara already felt close to and comfortable with Frau Klein. She knew that the elderly woman felt the same toward her. Everyone’s substitute grandmother, Peter had said. Perhaps Frau Klein would become more than a substitute to her. And then there was that sewing room at the back of the inn. Frau Klein had made it clear that Sara was welcome to use it any time. It was summoning her as if it had some magic power.
She suddenly felt an intense desire to write to Dot and tell her all of this. Maybe she’d even write to Malou, explaining what it felt like to finally feel at peace with who you were. She would definitely send a letter off to Mrs. Hazelton, who she knew would be happy at her decision to remain in Germany a while longer.
At the thought of Mrs. Hazelton, Sara paused. The matron had told her that she needed to look back and explore her past in order to understand herself. Well, she had done enough of that—had discovered everything that she needed to know. Now Sara knew that it was time to look forward. She grabbed Peter’s hand and held it tightly. Then the two of them turned to leave the cemetery.
This time, Sara did not look back.
AUTHOR’S NOTE
Although Stones on a Grave is a work of fiction, there are some historical elements of this story that are true.
In the aftermath of the Holocaust, many survivors of the Nazi concentration camps were left homeless, malnourished and extremely sick. The United Nations Relief and Rehabilitation Administration (UNRRA) was assigned responsibility for these sick and displaced refugees. A number of former concentration camps became the home for these individuals and became known as displaced persons (DP) camps. Föhrenwald was the largest of these DP camps. It grew to have nearly 5,000 people and developed a rich educational and cultural life. It had a school, vocational training institute and religious academy, and it provided music and theater for its residents.
By 1950 most inhabitants of Föhrenwald had found new homes elsewhere. The camp finally closed in 1957. Since then it has been renamed Waldram and has become a residential neighborhood.
Bad Arolsen is the home of the International Tracing Service, an organization that collects the records of the millions who were persecuted under the Nazi regime. These archives were only opened to the public in 2007.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Huge thanks to Eric Walters, who was the inspiration behind the original Seven series and then developed the idea of giving voice to seven female characters. Your creativity never ceases to amaze me. I’m thrilled to be on this ride and grateful to be able to bring my personal commitment to telling stories of the Holocaust to this project. Thanks as well to Teresa Toten, our navigator and guiding spirit, and to the other writers in this series. I’m proud to be in your company. I’m indebted to Andrew Wooldridge and all the folks at Orca for making this series possible. Special thanks to Sarah Harvey for her encouragement and watchful eye on all of these stories. Thanks as well to Katrin Farkas for the German translations. And to my personal readers, Ian, Jake, Gabi, Rose and Ness, I value your support and feedback more than you can know.
KATHY KACER is the author of many books for young readers, including The Secret of Gabi’s Dresser, Clara’s War, The Underground Reporters, Hiding Edith, The Diary of Laura’s Twin, To Hope and Back, Shanghai Escape and, her latest book, The Magician of Auschwitz. A winner of the Silver Birch, Red Maple, Hackmatack and Jewish Book Awards in Canada and the United States, as well as the Yad Vashem award for Children’s Holocaust Literature in Israel, Kathy has written unforgettable stories inspired by real events. Her books have been translated into more than twenty languages and sold to Germany, China, Italy, Thailand, England, Japan, Korea, Israel, Brazil, Belgium and many other countries. Her novels are stories of hope, courage and humanity in the face of overwhelming adversity.
Although she has been writing for many years, Kathy only became a p
ublished author in 1999. Before that, she worked as a psychologist with troubled teens. Kathy teaches writing at the University of Toronto’s School of Continuing Studies. She also speaks to children and educators in schools and libraries around the world about the importance of understanding the Holocaust and keeping its memory alive. For more information, visit www.kathykacer.com.
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Copyright © 2015 Kathy Kacer
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system now known or to be invented, without permission in writing from the publisher.
Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication
Kacer, Kathy, 1954–, author
Stones on a grave / Kathy Kacer.
(Secrets)
Issued in print, electronic and audio disc formats.
ISBN 978-1-4598-0659-7 (pbk.).—ISBN 978-1-4598-0660-3 (pdf).—
ISBN 978-1-4598-0661-0 (epub).—ISBN 978-1-4598-1090-7 (audio disc)
I. Title. II. Series: Secrets (Victoria, B.C.)
PS8571.A33S76 2015 jC813'.54 C2015-901747-5
C2015-901748-3 C2015-901749-1
First published in the United States, 2015
Library of Congress Control Number: 2015935516
Summary: In this YA novel, Sara arrives in Germany determined to explore her newly discovered Jewish heritage and solve the mystery of her parentage.
Orca Book Publishers gratefully acknowledges the support for its publishing programs provided by the following agencies: the Government of Canada through the Canada Book Fund and the Canada Council for the Arts, and the Province of British Columbia through the BC Arts Council and the Book Publishing Tax Credit.
Cover design by Teresa Bubela
Cover images by Shutterstock.com and Dreamstime.com
Author photo by Nicole Kagan
ORCA BOOK PUBLISHERS
www.orcabook.com
