Ugly. The word whispered through my mind again and I bit down gently on my lower lip, halting its trembling as his narrow, blue eyes trained on me.
Assessing.
Pulling.
Calming.
His eyes were something I couldn't shy away from, no matter how hard I tried. Because as deeply as my flight instincts were ingrained in me, they didn't take notice when I was in Hudson's presence.
It was as if my body knew that he was safe.
He was good.
He wasn't going to hurt me.
As that thought whispered through my mind, a low sigh left me and my nerves began to calm.
“Need you to stay out here for a bit. My place hasn't been kept the way it should be for guests. I have been working a lot and I haven't found the time to clean properly. Give me ten minutes. I'll let you in soon.”
Everything in my tensed body softened as I heard the worry his tone held.
Was he seriously worried about the state of his home when I saw it for the first time?
I wouldn't have cared if there were clothes thrown on every available surface.
Any time we were alone together, my entire body buzzed with the effect he had on me. My attention was constantly trained on him.
I realized that it wasn't one thing that drew me to him.
It was the package that it came in. It was what laid underneath the layers of hot, smooth skin and ink that I craved for.
It hit me then that he was humble. Hudson worried about how I felt about his place of living and it warmed my heart and made it stop all together.
I didn't care. I just wanted to spend time with him.
“Hudson.” I said, my voice raspy and shaking from the emotions he had pulled from me with his quiet admission.
“I don't care if your place is messy. Let me in.”
I tipped his head down toward mine and with the five or so inches he had on me, he had to bend his knees a bit for us to be at the same height.
“Are you sure? There may be-”
I pushed my fingers over his full mouth and shook my head at him, partly in amusement and partly in exasperation.
“Don't care, Hudson.”
His head nodded and as it did, some of his hair fell between where our faces were only inches from each other.
I laughed lightly and pushed the thick, smooth strands through my fingers.
The sound of his soft growl against my cheek stirred the dormant desire within me and I felt hot moisture pool between my legs.
“Don't know how I'm ever going to take it slow with you.”
My head drew back from his as I frowned, unsure if he meant to say that out loud or if he was talking to himself.
“What?”
He grabbed my hand in his and shrugged my question away.
“Come on.”
Chapter Twelve
Emberly
I SAT AT the breakfast nook of Hudson's spacious, brightly lit kitchen as he moved about the room. His tightly toned shoulders and arms rippled and flexed as he pulled a large crock-pot from the top shelve of a cabinet above the stove and greedily, my eyes took him in.
He dominated the space without much effort, his presence creating a thick aura of energy in the air between us.
“Can I help?” I asked. When his stark blue eyes met mine over the top of the island counter tops, the hard lines in his face softened and he nodded.
“Can you chop these vegetables while I start the Chile?”
Nodding, excitement buzzed through me at the thought of cooking with him.
Silence settled between us as I took the long, kitchen knife from his hand and set into the task of cutting up the tomatoes, green pepper and potatoes placed on the cutting board. The smell of spiced Chile hit my nose and wafted over my taste-buds as I took in a deep breath of the heavenly scent. I wasn't exactly a good cook. Having never been taught how to prepare a proper meal, I settled for simple, fast food when I was home and take out the rest of the time. It sufficed, I guessed. But now I was craving this home cooked meal we were making and hoped it was the first of many to come.
My mind must have wandered as I focused on what I was doing because when Hudson's smooth hands clasped my shoulders from behind, squeezing gently a gasp leaves me.
“Sorry. I didn't mean to startle you. The sauce is ready.”
Smiling softly, I nodded and looked up where I saw approval once again dancing through his gaze. My chest warmed instantly.
I didn't know why, but knowing that I made him happy, even in such a small way, warmed me up. I diverted my gaze as I cut the last couple of potatoes in front of me. His warm breath washed over my neck as his head lowered closer to mine. I felt his jaw rub against my cheek as he spoke again.
“I'll put these in and then start the bread.”
I expected him to pull away from me then, but again, the rough whiskers of his beard rubbed against my over heated skin. The sensation of it enticed a shiver to dance up my spine.
“O-okay.” I shakily said and I swore I could feel his sinful smile against my cheek.
Hudson moved to the oven and my eyes followed him as he went to the stove top and tipped the white edged cutting board, using the steak knife grasped in his hand to sweep the array of vegetables into the sauce.
“You want to see the rest of the house?” He asked, his back pressed to the brick wall adjacent to where I sat and his muscles flexed as he placed his arms across his chest in the ultimate bad boy way.
I licked my lip unconsciously and nodded, moving toward him until I stopped a foot in front of him. The pull radiated through the room as he stared at me, those wide, intense eyes raking over seemingly every inch of my body before he settles his attention on my eyes again.
“Fuck, do you know how beautiful you are?”
A blush covered my cheeks at his praise and my gaze dipped to the floor, unsure of how to take his words. I had always had a problem feeling beautiful.
Maybe it was because of my father.
Maybe it was because every time I looked in the mirror, all I could see was the extra skin on my middle and the curves that lined my body.
The space between us diminished as he moved toward me, his thumb and forefinger taking a gentle hold on my chin lifting my gaze away from my feet and to his softened gaze.
“One day, you are going to see yourself the way I do. I'll make sure of it.”
My mouth dropped open slightly, my mind fumbling for words to say back to that, but none came. I wasn't sure what he was telling me was possible but I knew that if any man could do it, it would be him.
He was a demanding man. If he demanded me to look at myself, I would.
“Do you know how Beautiful you are?” He repeated, his voice gentle this time and I bit my lip, unsure of the statement but with the way his eyes rove over me in hunger, I was started to believe him.
He moved closer, his hands moving to my shoulders, sliding down ever so slowly until he took my hands in his and moved his thumb over each of my knuckles. I stepped back from him, my heart racing at his proximity but he didn't let up on his hold on me, caging me in until his brown leather couch hit the backs of my knees and his hard lined body pressed to every soft curve I had. I felt the heat rise to my cheeks as he moved closer and the bulge in his black jeans pressed against my belly. An undeniable heat licked through me then, like liquid fire. It pulsed through my chest, causing my heart to beat faster until I was sure he could hear it. My veins fired with it while my skin pebbled with the need for his touch on me again.
“Hudson, what are you doing?” I breathed, feeling his hands travel down the front of the blue blouse I changed into after work today. My body swayed impossibly closer, every line of my body melting to his as he reached the bottom of the fabric and his blue eyes, dark with a mixture of hunger and something else I couldn't decipher.
“Touching you.”
His head dipped and his mouth pressed to my throat roughly as he spoke again, his words eng
raved in my skin.
“Kissing you.”
He drew his head back and took hold of my blouse once more, his gaze turning serious as he slowly lifted it over my stomach and rib cage.
A heavy breath left my lips in the wake of his touch and I nodded.
He would take care of me.
Hudson lifted the fabric higher up my body and I moved my arms above my head so that he could take it off of me. He moved back to me instantly, his roughly skinned hands roving over my waist, my curved hips and higher, still.
My breaths came faster and shorter the higher his hands traveled and soft moans fell between us. I felt hot, too hot. Like my body was being burned alive by his heated stare and his hot skin against mine as his fingers reached my shoulders. A finger traced a line down one shoulder, his touch achingly slow. It ventured lower, tracing against the thin, black strap of my bra. My breath caught in my throat and I looked up at him, hoping he could see how much I wanted, no craved him in this moment.
I had thought of this and nothing but this since he first kissed me yesterday and I knew it was right.
It was fast and maybe a bit crazy for me to want him this much in such a short amount of time but in this moment, I didn't care.
I trusted him.
I reached behind my back and undid the clasp at the back of my bra, allowing it to loosen around my arms. Heat bled through the pale blue color in his eyes as he watched me and his mouth laxed in what I thought had to be desire.
“Fuck, look at you.”
His hands went to my bottom, both hands pressing firmly to the denim covered flesh and then he was lifting me up his body until I had no choice but to wrap my legs around his waist and my hands grasped his large, wide shoulders as he sat me on the couch behind us. The sensation of the cool leather and his mouth sucking at my exposed throat caused a whimper to leave my mouth and he chuckled.
“Does my Darlin' need something?”
I nodded, loving the way he spoke to me.
Like I was special and that he couldn't stop himself from wanting me like he did. My hands wrapped around the long strands at the back of his head as he placed wet kisses along my jaw, behind my ear and further down my body until his mouth was pressed to my collarbone. I had never been kissed there but I arched up into his mouth at the sensitivity I felt. The whiskers of his beard trailed over my heavy breasts as he ventured lower and I felt him smile against my skin.
“Hudson, please.” The plea fell from my lips easily. I wasn't sure what I was begging him for, though. Was I begging him to stop the torture of his mouth on me? Or did I want more?
His mouth caught one of my nipples then, his teeth scraping against my areola and I moaned his name louder, fervent need curling through my stomach and down to where I was aching for relief.
Take me.
The words were on the tip of my tongue but I was afraid to say them. My hands clenched against the leather cushion under me and my fingers slipped against it as he moved over me, his body caging me in.
“Lay back, Darlin'. I'm going to take care of you.”
My body melted at his promise and pressing my shoulders and head back against my cushions, I bit my lip as hot need pooled low in my stomach and my pussy clenched around nothing.
God, I wanted this.
I wanted him to claim me.
And it scared me, but still, I craved it.
He moved on to my other breast, his fingers latched on to both of my pointed nipples then tortured them with slow pulls of his hot mouth. When I felt his tongue come out to tease them, my hips moved off of the couch and pressed to the front of his pants where I felt the undeniable hardness of his cock and a damp spot against the fabric there. My body was so hot and sensitive and I needed something. I needed him.
I never liked asking for what I wanted from people but as I laid there beneath him and his hot gaze traveled over my bare body, I did.
“I need more.”
Hudson's mouth tilted into a sexy smile and he nodded, his mouth bruising mine in a kiss before I could get another word out.
“Open your legs, baby.”
I parted them for him, my knees falling over the edge of the leather as he reached under the fabric of the white flowy skirt I wore for our date and finding the lace panties that lay beneath.
“You're fucking drenched, Em. Is this for me? Have you been thinking of me?”
I nodded hurriedly, my body coming alive with desire as he dipped one thick finger through my folds and against my clit. Sparks flew beneath my skin and I heard my panting breath grow faster as he strummed the aching bundle of nerves.
Once.
Twice.
On the third time, he hit a tender spot within me and I arched my back, my hips raising toward him.
“Oh, please…”
He moved down my body and I heard a rip and then the sound of my lace panties tearing. I gasped, ready to protest but didn't get the chance before his full, sinful mouth was on me.
Licking over my clit and then inside me, his hands held me in place with a strong hold and he controlled my pleasure as his mouth moved over my heated flesh, his tongue licking up and around before he added one, then two digits inside my walls.
“Oh god, oh god, Hud…”
I tried to hold back the onslaught of sensation that curled into a ball in my belly, sending sparks flying through my veins and sounds of pleasure fell from my mouth. My orgasm built impossibly fast and there was no stopping it.
“Hudson, oh god, I'm going to come.”
At my words he bit my pulsing clit, scraping his teeth over the swollen bundle of nerves and pulled my lower lips between his lips before moving faster, adding yet another finger to my core until I felt full of him. I began to tremble as the waves rocked through me at lightning speed and my thighs shook as he took one more long, slow pull of my juices before moving back up my lax body.
“You feel beautiful yet?” His raspy voice was against my ear as he spoke and my eyes opened, the effects of my orgasm leaving me sated underneath him.
I closed my eyes again and nodded, not bothering to hide the deep blush that I knew was visible on my face as he looked at me.
“I think so.” I whispered.
Chapter Thirteen
Emberly
HUDSON SWIPED A wet bath cloth between my legs with gentle, smooth touches as he takes care of me and my chest warms at the sensation his tender care brings me.
“You didn't have to do that.” I said as he tugged me up to stand and slides a warm hand around my hip to hold me close.
His lips tipped up in a small smile, his head shaking at me.
“I told you, I'll take care of you.”
I took his hand and nodded, my heart faltering when I saw the evident affection that bled through his gaze as he looked down at me.
“I'm not used to being taken care of.” I confessed, letting him lead me toward the dining room table set just beside a large window. The curtains were drawn up and the only light filtering in the room were from the stars of the night sky.
His hand tightening over mine caused my eyes to returned to him and I saw a darkness in his stoic face I didn't expect.
It confused me.
“Did I say something wrong?”
“No, Darlin'.” His softly spoken words were against my ear and a shiver licked up my spine, having not realized he was so close.
“I need you to know that's gonna change. I know you are an independent woman and I don't want to take that from you but I also won't let you feel alone ever again. You've got me now.”
My heart quickened in my chest as I took in what he had said.I felt the squeeze of my hands within his, telling me he wasn't going anywhere.
I didn't want him to.
The thought that I wanted what he was eluding to so deeply terrified me.
I took a step back from him, but as I expected, I didn't get far.
“Hudson, you can't possibly think this will work.”
One thic
k eyebrow raised as he silently questioned me and I shook my head, exasperation replacing my fear. I welcomed it. I could deal with annoyance at his stubborn ways. What I couldn't handle was the hope that I could have found someone to trust, to love, to believe in.
Could Hudson truly be that person in my life?
“I don't know what you thought this was, but I'm not spending time with you because of some passing interest. I am here and you are here because I want much more from you. I want you, Darlin'.”
The fingers of his left hand moved to my cheek then and I gasped, my breath stalling in my throat as that stupid hope fluttered through my stomach again.
I want you, Darlin'.
God, I wanted him, too.
As if by gravity my body pressed closely to his much larger one and I pushed my fingers through the collar of his shirt to feel the heated skin of his chest, just over his heart. Touching him calmed my erratic heartbeat and enhanced the hope to bloom. In that moment I knew there had to be a reason he made me feel this way.
We fit.
The thought filtered through my mind and I tipped my head back to see his eyes and they were assessing me, just as I was him.
It was as if we were waiting for who would pull away first.
“What do you want from me?” I finally asked, my voice coming out unsure because I honestly didn't know what his answer would be.
His head dropped lower to mine and our foreheads touched.
The action reminded me of our kiss in the supply closet of the hospital earlier today and I closed my eyes so he didn't see where my mind had drifted.
“I want to see where this goes. I want to be with you, Emberly. Can you do that with me?” His voice was softened with caution and hope and it was a dangerous combination for a man like him.
I sighed, knowing that in some way, I had seen this coming a month ago when I felt the connection between us for the first time.
He grasped my jaw in his hand that was holding my cheek and with a gentle tug, my eyes slid over his again.
There was no denying the emotion laying in his stare and if I turned away from it, I knew I would regret it.
I had dreamed of the day that I could find my happily ever after. I had a strange feeling that this was it.
Air I Breathe (Hudson and Emmy Book 1) Page 8
