Minni had a book at home that talked about the human body. She could see the colorful diagrams in her mind’s eye, exactly as they appeared in the book. “The liver,” she said confidently.
“Your skin,” Miss Oliphant said.
Minni stared into her drink.
“That’s an awful lot of yourself not to like, don’t you think?” Miss Oliphant watched Minni carefully and slurped her hot chocolate.
Minni took a sip. Maybe so, she thought, but that was how she felt, and she didn’t see how knowing her outer layer was her largest organ would change that. It wasn’t just her largest organ—it was the part of her that people saw before anything else and decided who she was…how to treat her…whether she belonged.
“Man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart,” Miss Oliphant said.
Her heart. What was hidden in her heart? “I’m scared,” Minni said.
“Of what, child?”
“Of getting treated better than my sister.” She looked up at Miss Oliphant. “And that it will come between us.”
“Hmmm. That’s a tough one. Your color will get you treated differently than your sister, sometimes better. The question is how will you use this to help make the world a more equitable place?”
Minni gripped her mug. Miss Oliphant hadn’t given her any assurances about what effect all this might have on her and Keira.
“So, back to my original question. What fits your soul?” Miss Oliphant asked.
Minni closed her eyes and tried to let herself be. How did she feel, deep inside? What did she believe? For some reason, she thought about sitting in Grandmother Johnson’s church, swaying to the choir’s voices. Something had stirred inside her. She was not an outsider peering in, a spectator. She was connected to the people there—maybe not by outer appearance, but by something deeper. Something in all their hearts. These were her people. This music, this feeling, this longing to be seen as a person and not just a color—it was hers, too.
But then there was Daddy, with his desire to be alone—in the sky or in the woods—and she could relate to that, too. She was connected to him, by their skin color and by something in their hearts as well. He would always be her daddy. She was about to say “I’m not sure” when she felt Miss Laverna’s hand on her arm.
“You don’t have to know right now. You’ve got time.”
Minni set down her mug. “Thanks for the hot chocolate. It was heavenly.” She took one last look at Sophie, the wisdom doll, and headed for the door.
Miss Oliphant followed her. “Good luck tomorrow.”
“Thank you.”
“And, Minni, if you think your skin is going to keep you from belonging, it will. But it doesn’t have to.”
Minni cocked her head, considering Miss Oliphant—Miss Laverna—once more. Then she turned and walked down the steps. She might not have known what label best fit her soul, but she was confident of at least one thing: She didn’t think she was better than Keira. She knew this as surely as she knew they came from the same mama.
Chapter Twenty-nine
The next day, first Gigi and then Mama and Daddy called to wish them good luck. Minni used her speakerphone so she and Keira could talk at the same time. Keira was still acting kind of distant after last night’s conversation, but she jabbered with excitement during the calls.
“You’ll be great!” Daddy said.
“Be yourselves,” Mama added.
They promised to do their best, then hung up and gathered their things to leave.
Grandmother Johnson had gone completely overboard with her dress—a full-length black gown with curlicue appliqués and a surprisingly low neckline. Instead of her gold locket, she wore a blindingly bright diamond necklace and teardrop earrings to match. A sheer black wrap lay on the car seat beside her.
She talked nonstop all the way to the Hotel Lamont. “We remembered everything, right? Opening-number outfits—leotards, tights, skirts…gowns, heels, nylons…talent outfits…”
She glanced in the rearview mirror. “Are those flowers holding up all right?”
Keira had asked Grandmother Johnson if she would cut her a couple of yellow roses to accessorize her hair, which was still straight from the flatiron, but which she’d gathered into a bun behind one ear, opposite her side part. The flowers rested on her lap in a plastic baggie, their stems wrapped in wet paper towels. “They’re good,” Keira said.
“Fine. Let’s see…what else? Hair spray, makeup—keep it modest, remember…” Grandmother Johnson glanced at Keira again. “You’re sure you have everything you need to do your sister’s hair?” They’d run out of time at the house.
Keira nodded.
“Good. And don’t forget to smile at all times. Not forced, never forced—natural smiles. And when you’re walking across the stage in your gowns, keep your chins up and your shoulders back, but don’t let your chests protrude too much. And drink a little water before you go onstage, but sip, don’t gulp, lest you trap air in your stomach. And…”
Minni tuned her out.
At the hotel, Grandmother Johnson pulled into the circular drive and around the spouting fountain to the gold-framed front doors. She got out, handed the keys to the valet and ordered a bellboy to bring a luggage cart for her granddaughters’ things, all at the same time.
That was when Minni noticed. She nudged Keira with one hand and used the other to point. “Her shoes,” Minni whispered.
Keira gasped.
Their grandmother wore her sturdy pumps, but only one was black. The other was clearly navy blue! “Should we tell her?” Minni asked.
“Nah.” Keira snickered and her eyes sparkled with a familiar light.
Minni’s insides were a mess—between her nerves and the awful fear that Keira was still questioning whether Minni thought she was better than her—but at that moment she reveled in Keira’s smile. There was no greater feeling in the world than sharing a secret with her sister.
Inside, Alisha’s grandmother, Alisha and a middle-aged woman who Minni guessed was Alisha’s mom stood in the corridor talking. Grandmother Johnson and Mrs. Russell gave each other once-overs.
“Ernestine,” Grandmother Johnson said coolly as they passed. Mrs. Russell nodded in response. Fortunately for Grandmother Johnson, she didn’t notice the mismatched shoes.
“This is it, Alisha,” the middle-aged woman said. Minni felt Alisha’s eyes following them. “Stay focused. No stupid mistakes. All right?”
“All right.” Alisha sounded aggravated.
When they reached the dressing room door, Grandmother Johnson pulled Minni and Keira aside. “I know you will compete with the utmost decorum…” They started to leave but she grabbed them by their shoulders. “But one of you needs to beat that girl, Alisha. Got it?”
They glanced at each other, then headed for the door.
Grandmother Johnson called out. “Take no prisoners!”
They got into their opening-number outfits—black tights and ballet slippers, sparkly leotards and silver skirts—and then Minni sat in front of a mirror so Keira could do her hair. Girls dressed and twittered excitedly around them.
Keira worked silently and was a little rougher than usual. She never looked Minni in the eye. The chill coming off her made Minni feel cold. Why was Keira still mad? Minni had told her she didn’t think she was better. Didn’t Keira believe her? Didn’t her sister know her better than that?
Keira used her curling iron to make ringlets around Minni’s face, put in the two rhinestone flower clips, then sprayed the hair spray. Minni would have to make sure no one lit a match within ten feet of her head or they would all go up in flames.
Minni stood to let Keira take her chair. “Would you please talk to me?” she pleaded.
Keira opened her makeup pouch and applied some sparkly blush. She glanced at Minni in the mirror. Her lips scrunched to one side. She rose and pulled Minni behind a clothing rack. “Why didn’t you talk to any of the girls yesterday?” sh
e whispered.
“Why did you ignore me all day?” Minni asked, still feeling the sting of what seemed like her sister’s abandonment.
“Because you need to learn how to make friends on your own!”
“I never go up to new people and start talking. That’s what you do.”
Keira huffed. “You could, too, if you tried.”
Minni’s neck and ears got hot. “You know I’m not stuck-up, Keira. I’m shy!”
“Of course I know that, but I’m not always going to be there to help you out…or to defend you.”
Minni’s eyes stung with tears. She grabbed Keira’s hand. “Please don’t be mad at me. I can’t go through with this if I feel like you’re mad at me. I won’t. You said we’d get through this together.”
Keira exhaled again. Her eyes looked sorry, but her jaw was still firm and her arm was stiff and tense.
Minni let go of Keira’s hand and put her fists on her hips. She spoke loudly. “I officially withdraw from the Miss Black Pearl Preteen of America pageant—”
Alisha rounded the rack, nearly bumping into Keira. “Thank goodness,” Alisha said. “Now I don’t have to worry about getting a black eye.”
“Bug off,” Keira said.
Alisha looked aghast. “What did you say?”
“Bug off!”
“After I chose to sit next to you and be nice to you yesterday?”
“We all know you’re just trying to win Miss Congeniality along with the title. You’re as see-through as Saran Wrap, Alisha.”
The girl’s eyes narrowed. “You better watch yourself, Keira King. My mama’s been preparing me for this since the day I was born, and I will win.” Alisha opened a canister of Vaseline, scooped out a glob and ran it over her teeth.
Minni shuddered at the thought of the thick stuff in her mouth, but she did something else as well. Something that surprised her, but she did it. She stepped forward and looked Alisha right in the eye. “Well, Alisha Walker, I hope your mama’s ready for a big disappointment, because my sister’s going to beat you.”
Alisha gave her an evil eye, then spun, whipping her ponytail in Minni’s face. She stalked away.
Keira took Minni’s hands in her own. “You have to do this, Min—not for Grandmother Johnson or our parents, not even for me. For your own sake.” She looked straight into Minni’s eyes. “You have to believe it’s your right to be out there.”
Minni’s heart felt like an egg being pecked on from the inside. With each moment she gazed into her sister’s deep brown eyes, her heart cracked a little more. She was overcome by a sudden need to tell her sister about the lady at the dress shop. “She treated me kindly, Keira.”
The skin between Keira’s eyes crinkled.
“The lady at the gown shop. Before you and Gigi came in, she was totally friendly and full of compliments. I put my hands all over a bunch of dresses and she didn’t say a thing.” Minni hadn’t realized how heavy the secret had become. She suddenly felt fifty pounds lighter.
Keira looked at the floor.
“I didn’t mean to pass for white—really, I didn’t.”
Keira looked into her eyes again.
Minni knew her sister’s eyes better than any others, even better than her own. She’d been staring into them since before she was born. “And I don’t think I’m better than you.” She squeezed Keira’s hands. “You’re the other half of my heart.”
Keira squeezed back. The hairs on Minni’s arms prickled.
Miss Jackie opened the door from the stage. “Let’s go, everyone! In your places!”
Minni and Keira jumped to finish getting ready. Keira gave Minni a coat of lip gloss and a little of Gigi’s Marla Ray blush. They pinned each other’s numbers to their hips. Then they stood at the stage door, the last ones in the room. Keira messed with Minni’s hair, repositioning her bobby pins. “Ready?” she asked.
“I don’t know,” Minni said. “I guess I’m about to find out.” She took her sister’s hand. “Shine, Keira. Brighter than ever. Shine.”
Chapter Thirty
As soon as they stepped through the door, Miss Jackie grabbed them and pulled them toward the stage. The other girls were already in position behind the closed curtains. “Where have you been? You’re late!”
“Sorry, Miss Jackie,” Keira said. She squeezed Minni’s hand, then smiled her brilliant smile. “Break a leg!” She paused. “Wait. Scratch that. Have fun!” She ran to her place in front.
Minni stood frozen. She couldn’t remember a single dance step. What were they supposed to do first? Step left or right? Or was it forward? A spin?
And her personal introduction—how did it start? She couldn’t even remember the first line. What was she doing out there? I can’t do this! Help, someone…anyone, help!
Miss Jackie pushed her toward her spot in back. “You’ll be fine. Just do the best you can.”
“Ladies and gentlemen,” a man’s voice announced. The girls around Minni murmured with excitement—everyone except Alisha. She stood in position, eyes straight ahead, like a hunting dog on point.
“Welcome to the ninth annual Miss Black Pearl Preteen National Achievement Program!” Lots of applause.
“And now, let’s meet our girls as they dance to a song that reminds us all—‘We…Are…Fami-leeeee’!” More applause. The music started. The curtains parted.
The spotlights were so bright, Minni couldn’t see a single face in the audience. Looking at the crowd was like looking at the ocean on a dark, moonless night. She fixed her eyes on Keira’s back, and though she was a little late with the first step, she took it. Suddenly she was off and dancing with the rest of them.
She spun one direction: one, two, three, and clap! And the other direction: one, two, three, and clap! Time for the back row’s chance to show their stuff. They sashayed forward.
Here in front, she could see the table of judges. Miss Laverna looked dazzling in a sparkling lavender jacket. She winked at Minni, and Minni almost lost her place in the routine, but then the girls around her stooped to the ground, and even though she was a beat behind, Minni did the same, and she was back in the swing of things.
She had half a mind to reach when she was supposed to slide so she could get Alisha in the eye again, but while that might be bold, it wouldn’t be very wise. She did the sequence correctly…kick, spin, reach and slide. Her row returned to the back.
They ended with their arms in the air, waving their hands. Minni could smell her melony sweat, but she smiled anyway. The only other people who could smell it back here would be the girls to either side of her, and if the stink caused Alisha to make a sour face, that would be all the better for Keira. Minni waved even harder to get the odor to waft toward the snooty girl’s nostrils.
Now it was time for the girls to run forward one at a time for their thirty-seconds-or-less personal introductions. They clasped hands and swayed back and forth while they waited their turns. Alisha held Minni’s hand as stiffly as a Ping-Pong paddle, as if in protest at having to touch her.
Minni frantically searched her mind for the words she had rehearsed at Grandmother Johnson’s so many times. Keira, one of the first to go, did beautifully, of course.
Too quickly, girls in the back row were pulling away to take their turns at the microphone. Suddenly Alisha was at the front of the stage, bragging to everyone how she’d been competing in pageants since she was five.
Minni silently repeated the one line she could recall. Hopefully the rest would follow once she got up there.
Alisha was returning to her place. Minni’s shoes felt as if they’d been nailed to the floor. “Go!” the girl to her right whispered. She gave Minni a little shove.
Minni jumped, then started her jog forward. She avoided looking at Alisha as they crossed paths. She rounded the front row. Keira gave her another big smile. She stepped up to the mike, took a breath and enunciated every word as loudly and clearly as she could. “My name is Minni King. I’m eleven years old and I’
m from Port Townsend, Washington. My best friend and twin sister, Keira, and I were born in our daddy’s airplane…” She thought she heard Grandmother Johnson cry out. “And I plan to learn to fly one day. I love animals, reading and spending time with my family. Most of all, I want to be like Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., and do something to make the world a”—she looked at Miss Laverna—“a more equitable place for everyone. Thank you.”
People applauded, and she ran back to her place. Alisha smirked. “An airplane?”
Minni ignored her and smiled out at the audience. She had done it.
After a few more introductions, the curtains closed and everyone hurried offstage.
Keira grabbed Minni. “You were great!”
“You too.”
“How’d you do on the dance routine?”
“I tried to throw off Alisha with my stinky pits.” They ran into the dressing room, laughing.
While Keira changed into her tumbling outfit, Minni read the lyrics to “His Eye Is on the Sparrow” from the sheet music. Over and over, until it was as good as branded on her brain. Then she sat in the corner with her eyes closed and breathed deeply, in and out, just like Mama had taught Keira to do before she took a test.
Breathing reminded you you were alive, Mama said, and that was the most important thing to be.
Minni wasn’t sure if God watched her the way the song talked about or not, but there was someone who would always be aware of her existence. Always care that she was alive. Always know who she was.
Keira.
The deep breathing got her so relaxed, she drifted into a dream. She and Keira were climbing the Sisters, hand in hand. They had just reached the summit of the tallest peak when someone shook her. “I’m going on soon,” she heard.
Minni jerked awake. Keira crouched next to her. Minni remembered where she was and scrambled to her feet. She changed into her blouse and skirt, then hurried with her sister to the wings and watched as Keira took flight. Keira soared through her routine, tumbling, twirling and flipping to the raucous remixed symphony music. She was awesome. The applause was deafening.
The Other Half of My Heart Page 19
