Rihanna nodded, taking in everything he said. What struck her was how little she really knew about him. Little things like that. What was his favourite colour? Which season did he prefer? What foods didn’t he like? What was his most vivid childhood memory? Who taught him to play guitar?
They were strangers who had been brought together by an operation.
“Uh oh, this isn’t good. She’s analysing something,” Jazz warned quietly, almost to herself.
Rihanna pushed her chair back and muttered, “I know nothing about him. How can I possibly do this? What was I even thinking?”
She hobbled from the room. What she didn’t see was the look of pain that sliced through Brayden’s near perfect features. Nor did she see him rise from his chair and try to follow before Jazz gripped his arm and shook her head, indicating he should let her go.
“Leave her be for a bit. She’s still processing,” Jazz warned.
“How can I leave her, Jazz, when she’s obviously hurting and confused?” He was hurting just as badly as her but felt helpless to do anything to fix it.
“She needs time, Brayden, to think things through. Just before was the first time that the baby became real to her. Remember, she has no symptoms yet. Not being able to drink coffee is a very real thing directly resulting from the baby. Till now the baby was just some fictional thing that we were all talking about. I think the realisation that she is really pregnant just hit.”
Brayden still looked pained but with a healthy dose of scepticism. “I hope you’re right, Jazz. Everything I am is screaming at me to go to her.” He dragged his hand through his hair. “Fuck, this is killing me.” Brayden’s eyes flashed to Rory, seeking support from his bother.
“She’ll come round, mate. Give her time. She’s had a truckload to deal with in the last two weeks.”
Brayden rounded to Jazz. “I’m not sure I can stick with the plan.”
“You need to. It will work.” Jazz sounded totally confident.
He wanted to argue with Jazz, but he knew she was probably right. The three of them closest to Rih had come up with a plan. Now they needed to see it through. Fuck, it would probably kill him in the process. How could he have ever agreed to this?
Rory chose that moment to ask the obvious. “Care to let me in on what the plan is?”
Brayden looked at Jazz, as if confirming her approval to disclose. Jazz nodded her head, indicating Brayden should proceed.
“I’m going to go and tour with the band for a month. Give Rih a bit of time to come to terms with all of this. Hopefully by then, she’ll have missed me and be prepared to give us a go. Peter has helped out by insisting she stay here and sort things out. Jazz is going to stay here with her on the ruse that she’s looking after her while she’s getting over the accident. The last thing we want is her going back to Peter’s and slipping into her old life and patterns,” Brayden briefly explained. That was the basic outline. There was, of course, more fine detail that Peter, Jazz, and he had worked through.
Rory nodded his understanding. “So what happens after a month?” he asked logically.
“Well, hopefully we’ll be back together by then. If not, I’ll probably do something drastic like plan an intervention and kidnap her myself.” Brayden raked his hand through his hair in frustration.
Rory just laughed at that. “You got it bad, bro. She’ll come round.”
“I hope you’re right.”
A wicked grin split across Rory’s face. “Aren’t I always?”
Brayden just laughed and nodded. “Mostly. So what are you up to?”
“Well, given all this relationship drama and the fact that for some reason the boss seems to have overlooked giving me anything serious to do, I’m figuring I’ll hang around here and keep an eye on the girls and Quade. That okay with you, mate?”
“Sure, make yourself at home. Oh my mistake, you already have,” Brayden joked sarcastically.
“Ha ha, Pony Boy.”
Brayden sobered. “No, seriously, Rory I’d be happy if you stayed around. I think she’s going to need all the support and gentle coercion she can get.”
“Okay, go play rock star, big fella. I’ll keep the home fires burning and look after the little women, oh sorry, totally ‘smoking’ hot women,” he joked and nudged Jazz. “It’s a tough job but somebody has to do it!”
The three of them burst out laughing at their own jokes. They all knew that Rihanna and Jazz were definitely not the helpless types. In fact, they were both so far on the other end of the scale, which was half the problem.
A look passed between them. Brayden knew Rory understood how much this meant to him. Having him around to answer questions and provide information would be a huge help and it would also allow Rihanna to do it from a more removed position. Hopefully this would give her confidence and a point of reference in her understanding of their unique abilities.
“Yeah, now I just have to break the news to Rihanna.”
Rory just smirked and chuckled.
***
She was lying on a sun lounge by the pool when Brayden wandered out. The first thing she noticed was he’d changed clothes. Gone were his casual board shorts and loose surf singlet. In their place was a pair of jeans that looked like they’d been tailored to fit his tight butt and muscular thighs. This he’d teamed with a mint green polo shirt that set off his tan and the chestnut highlights in his hair perfectly. She could look at him all day and never tire of the sight. And damn, there were those pesky butterflies in her stomach again. Why did he have to affect her like this? Sometimes the universe just plain sucked.
He walked over and dragged the other reclining lounge closer. He lowered his long frame down and sat facing her, his elbows resting on the tightly stretched denim of his thighs.
“Hey, baby, how you feeling?” She had no doubt about the sincerity or tenderness in his voice. He really did care.
“Okay, just taking it easy. What are you up to?” She nodded at him, indicating his clothes.
He looked away briefly before looking back to her. Her heart immediately leapt into her mouth and the butterflies in her stomach turned from the feeling of seeing the hot guy you were attracted to, to gut-wrenching fear. He had something on his mind and she had a horrible feeling she wasn’t going to like it.
He reached over and took her hand. His thumb began stroking the soft skin across the inside of her wrist. “I have to go away for a bit. Reece wants to spend some time with their new baby and the boys have a full tour planned for the next month. They asked if I could fill in and I agreed.”
She tried desperately to dislodge her heart out of the way so she could talk but it wasn’t quick enough in moving back to her chest.
“You asked me for some space and this is my way of giving it to you. Take the month to think about us and our baby. I want you to think about all the great things we’ve shared and all the amazing things that we’ll do together in the future.”
She went to protest but he reached forward and gently placed a finger across her lips, silencing her.
“Shhhh. I don’t want to argue with you. Just hear me.”
She nodded her agreement and he withdrew his finger; she didn’t realise it but she’d tightened her grip on his hand.
“I love you, Rihanna, with everything I am. I know you feel you don’t know me but you do. Nobody knows me better than you. You know everything about me that counts. Yes, I’m protective and a bit overbearing at times, and yes, I push you to be more open and comfortable about how you feel. And yes, I didn’t disclose everything about me until a few days ago. I also explained why. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to.” He paused, searching her eyes, looking for something.
“I need you to understand it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do keeping that secret from you. I asked you to trust me and I couldn’t give you everything that I am, then. I didn’t lie to you. I just didn’t fully disclose. That hurt you, cut you deep. But it hurt me, too, not being able to be fully open
with you. You’ve had a glimpse at what we could be and my secrets ripped it away. Now I can give you everything.”
He squeezed her hand. “Everything. All of it is yours. My heart, my body, the secret of my enhanced abilities, my possessions. They’re all yours. I’m giving you everything and I’m going to trust you not to hurt me with it.”
He took her other hand. Rihanna knew the significance of what he was saying. He had given her the power to destroy him. It was big; no, it was huge. “Now I need you to trust yourself enough to reach out to me and take it all. Share it with me. And in return I want you, all of you and this baby and however many more we’re blessed with.”
The power and depths of his eyes dragged her further in; she was drowning in them. Drowning in everything that was him. She felt the first hot wet tears she’d been trying to hold spill down her cheeks. He was just so overwhelming. His passion, sincerity, and confidence in her—in them—annihilated her.
It was something beautiful and she wanted it. But she also knew the extent of despair and pain she’d feel if she ever lost it.
“Think about what I’ve said. Be brave and I’ll see you in a month.” He leant forward and touched his lips to hers in a kiss that stole her breath. It was different than any other kiss they’d shared. It wasn’t about two people lost in passion. This one was about the future he sought; he was giving her a peek at what could be. How good it could be between them. It was a pictorial about love and home and together.
He gently pulled away after a few long seconds. She wanted more; she wanted to see how the story ended.
He caught her chin between his thumb and fingers, bringing her eyes back to him.
“I have to go. Rory’s taking me to the airport. Look after yourself and don’t overdo it. Let Rory and Jazz take care of you for a bit. Remember how much I love you and our baby.”
He dropped a butterfly kiss to the top of her head. “I’ll see you in a month, Rih.”
He turned and walked away without looking back. She knew he was trusting her to make the right decision.
If only she knew what it was.
Chapter Thirty-Four
It had been the longest week of her life. She’d lived a hollow existence, as if somehow the sun had been dimmed and shaded. The light just didn’t seem to penetrate.
She was restless and edgy. The physical pain was almost gone. The bruising would probably take another week or so to totally diminish. The cut on her hairline was looking good and Jazz had been pleased with the plastics guy’s handy work. They were confident it wouldn’t scar. Not that she really cared; she feared her heart would be more scarred than her face.
Physically she was on the mend but emotionally her heart still hurt in the worst way. It would be so easy to fall in with what Brayden said, what he wanted. His words were powerfully persuasive. Just like the man himself.
But this was about her. She needed to be sure about it and all she felt was gut-wrenching fear. Fear so acute she couldn’t eat and insomnia that felt as if it was working overtime to dislodge Jazz from the title of best friend. She asked herself the question once again for about the seven millionth time in the last week.
What was she going to do?
It was so difficult. Yesterday, Jazz had declared she’d had enough of the moping around here and living like a hermit. Jazz had dragged her off to have lunch with a friend of theirs from university who had a beautiful little four-month-old boy they’d called Thomas.
Her heart still ached at the image. He was incredibly gorgeous and had that unique new baby smell. Hailey had offered to let her hold him and she stupidly agreed. The baby had laughed and smiled and gurgled at her. His big eyes seemed to know her secret as he wrapped his perfect little hands around her soul.
It gave her hope and ripped her heart out at the same time, if that was possible. Hope that she’d have her own little bundle of Brayden to nurse and cuddle. They could be the perfect family. She wanted that. Oh, she wanted that. It stunned her just how much she did want it. It was something that she’d thought she’d get to eventually. Now it was a relentless yearning in her that seemed to be getting stronger every minute of the day.
Then the fear overwhelmed her and all she could think of were all the what if’s. What if her baby was born with animal features? What if the baby was obviously not human like his mother and father? How would they cope? What sort of life could they give a child like that? Were they just being selfish and sentencing a baby to a life of cruelty and ridicule? Could they be that selfish?
God, she’d woken up to that nightmare two nights ago and never cared to have it again, thank you very much. The terror had left her gasping for breath with tears running down her face and no Brayden to take away her fears.
All she could think about was a night just a few weeks ago where she’d awoke in a terror and his strong arms held her close, protecting her from the demons. The difference was now he was very much a part of the demons that stalked her. Him and the baby.
Logic told her that it wouldn’t happen. Obviously Brayden and the rest of the team had all been born normally and theoretically they had twice the animal DNA that her baby would. But what if? Maybe she should think about termination again? Did all mothers have these concerns? That was a question Jazz probably couldn’t answer.
Then little Thomas’s face appeared before her eyes and she felt like the worst person, worst mother in the world. What was the right answer?
Her thoughts were broken by Jazz coming back to the table that she was sitting at. They were out for the night, catching up with friends supposedly. Jazz had dragged her to this bar. Rihanna knew it was more of Jazz’s “You need to get out of the house” therapy. Rihanna had gone along simply to avoid the hassle of resisting and Jazz was probably right. She did need to get out and clear her head. Get things into perspective and live her life. Staying cooped up at Brayden’s was artificial in many senses.
Jazz plopped down an OJ in front of her and took a seat beside her with a glass of white wine.
“Wow, you were deep in thought,” she said over the din of the music.
Rihanna just nodded. She didn’t feel much like answering. She needed to snap out of it. Just because she had things on her mind didn’t give her a free pass to ruin everyone’s evening.
Jazz was looking around, watching for something. Then she popped up out of her seat and waved her arm to the two guys who had just walked in.
Rihanna glanced up; it was Mitch and the plastics doctor who had stitched her up. Wow, she didn’t expect that. Rihanna looked at Jazz questioningly.
“What? Oh that. Well, I got talking with Ben after he stitched you up. Seems he knows Mitch as well and he suggested we get together for drinks. When he texted this morning, I figured why not?” Mitch was a doctor. In fact, he was just starting to make a name for himself as a pretty good trauma surgeon. Jazz and Rihanna knew him from university. They’d all started in the same year.
The guys walked over after stopping at the bar and they both rose from the table. Mitch placed his beer glass on the table and gave both the girls a hug. Rihanna noticed he brushed a lock of hair from Jazz’s face and said something in her ear. Jazz just nodded and gave him another hug. Mmmm, something about Andy, she’d guess. They hadn’t seen Mitch since New Year’s Eve. Rihanna reminded herself she needed to be more conscious of Jazz as well. She wasn’t the only person in the world with problems and hurts.
Her attention was brought back to the present when Ben took her hand politely. “Hi again. It’s nice to see you outside a professional capacity.” He nodded towards the little line that was still a tiny bit red on her hairline. “That’s healing great. Give it another few weeks and you won’t even know it was there.”
“Well, I can thank you for that,” Rihanna acknowledged graciously.
He laughed. “All part of the service.” He gave her a huge smile. And was that a wink?
They both sat at the table. Jazz and Mitch seemed to be deep in conversation al
ready.
Rihanna realised she was going to have to make conversation with Ben. She took another look at him and processed his clean-cut looks. He was classically handsome, tall, fit looking and had very nicely cut dark brown hair and blue eyes. His jeans screamed designer and his white button-up shirt was obviously expensive and carefully pressed and selected.
Yep, he was definitely a guy any girl would give a second look to. In fact, a guy she knew she’d normally be interested in getting to know. Why did she not feel the least bit interested?
She could do this. Just talk to him.
He saved her the trouble of coming up with an opening line.
“So Rihanna, Jazz mentioned you were a vet. Seems it can be a rough job at times.”
She smiled a little and nodded. “Yeah, it can be. A filly decided to trample me into the ground when she got scared during that big storm.”
“Yeah, it sure was a doozey, that storm. My M5 got trashed with hail marks. It was in an outside car park when I was in theatre. Nothing I could do.” He gestured wide with his hands and shook his head, indicating his inability to save his car.
Rihanna didn’t fail to notice he mentioned the prestigious car he drove. She also noticed his hands. They were surgeon’s hands. Long, dexterous, and no doubt wonderful with a scalpel but would they be hands she’d want on her body?
The thought held absolutely no interest for her. She realised then there was only one man’s hands she wanted.
“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. I hope your insurance sorts it out,” she empathised.
“Yeah, I’m just going through the motions of that now. Those companies are so painful.”
“I’ve heard that. Fortunately, I’ve never had to make a claim.”
Before she had to make more small talk, Jazz jumped up and dragged Mitch with her.
“Come on, you guys. I love this song. Everyone’s dancing.”
Finding Trust (Centre Games) Page 40
