HEADMASTER

by Jaimie Roberts

  “I’m glad to hear it. You know both you and Mr Lockhart are in the same boat as far as being new is concerned, so whatever it is you need, just let me know.” She looks at Easton. “Both of you.” She then looks back to me. “I’m here to help.”

  That’s my cue to leave.

  “Thank you,” I say, starting to turn. “I’d better get back to my friend. It was nice seeing you.”

  Mrs Caterham starts laughing. “It really feels strange to find one of my students in a pub legally.” She continues to laugh as my face turns bright red.

  I need that drink now more than ever.

  I quickly scurry off, noticing Easton looking apologetically in my direction. Why he feels the need to, I have no idea.

  “You look like you need a double.”

  I look up at Brett, huffing. “How about a triple?”

  “Ouch. That bad, huh?” He motions with his head over to their table. “Didn’t take him long to move on, did it? Who’s that woman he’s with anyway? It seems like you two know each other.”

  As Brett grabs a glass and pours me a brandy, I lean forward, allowing my hand to shield me from Easton and Mrs Caterham. “That’s my form teacher.”

  Brett starts laughing. “Okay. So how does she know hot Scottish biker boy?”

  Closing my eyes, I sigh before meeting Brett’s expectant eyes. “He’s my headmaster.”

  “Your what?” he chokes loudly.

  “Yep. You inadvertently bet me to kiss my own headmaster.”

  Brett starts laughing so loudly that the whole bar turns their heads to look our way. “Shh,” I hiss, trying to calm him down.

  “Sorry,” he replies, trying to breathe.

  As he tries to catch his breath, I down my whole drink in one go. From wanting nothing more than to escape to this pub, I now find I need to escape from it.

  When Brett finally calms down and sees how upset I look, his face softens. “Sorry, babes. I didn’t realise. I bet that was a shock when you saw him this morning.”

  And then some!

  I huff again.

  “I just feel really awkward,” I admit. I kissed him only last night, then I find out he’s my headmaster, and now I find him here having a drink with Mrs Caterham.

  As if on cue, Easton approaches the bar and looks awkwardly at me before glancing at Brett. “A glass of white wine and a pint of Foster’s, please.”

  Brett nods. “Coming right up.”

  “I’m going to go,” I shout, so Brett can hear. “Call me later, okay?”

  Understanding, Brett just nods, giving me a two-finger salute from his forehead. “Will do, babes.”

  I can see Easton out of the corner of my eye. It’s like he wants to say something but doesn’t quite know what or how. I don’t give him a chance to converse. What is there to say anyway? It is what it is.

  Once I open the pub doors, I walk out, taking in a huge, deep breath as I do. I’m about to start walking when I hear the sound of the doors opening.

  “Sasha,” Easton calls. I know it’s him before I even turn around. I hear him running up behind me and when I turn, he still has this awkward look on his face. “She just wanted to go over some of the curriculum,” he says.

  “Why are you telling me this?” He has to know that he doesn’t owe me an explanation.

  I watch as he sighs, and his beautiful deep brown eyes momentarily look away. “I don’t know,” he replies, looking back to me. “I just felt like I needed to.”

  “Okay.” That’s all I say. What else can I say?

  “You seem upset.”

  I frown. “I do?”

  He steps forward, closing the distance between us, and the thought of him being near takes my breath away. Of course, Easton notices. “Are you going to be honest with me?” Glancing down, I notice his Nike trainers and it makes me smile for a moment. “What are you smiling at?”

  I snap my head up noticing the curious look on his face. “I don’t know. It just looks strange. You’re wearing the classic white t-shirt, jeans, and leather jacket for your bike, but then you totally throw it off with those Nike trainers.”

  Easton laughs. “Am I completely dashing your dreams of the classic bad-boy biker with leather jacket and boots?”

  I nod, laughing. “Totally killing it,” I respond, but I’m only joking. Easton could walk out with nothing but a tutu on and he’d still be the sexiest man alive.

  The moment of light-heartedness is short-lived as his eyes dart back towards the bar doors. “You better go back. She’ll be wondering where you are.”

  He nods, looking sad, and then he turns to leave. “Easton,” I shout, my heart hammering in my chest. He turns, looking expectantly at me. “I know I shouldn’t be upset.” I can’t seem to get the words out.

  “But you are?”

  I smile, nodding. “I have no excuse.”

  He shrugs, smiling. “I wanted complete honesty.” His beautiful, boyish face lights up before he turns to start walking back to the bar. “See you tomorrow, Sasha.”

  I watch as he disappears through the doors before sighing. I can’t believe I admitted how I felt, but then, he did ask. It makes me wonder for a moment why he asked. There’s nothing that can be done about it whether I feel something for him or not. Was I upset when I saw them together? Yes. Was I jealous, thinking I should have been the one there? Yes. I admit all of that and more. But, at the end of the day, he’s still my head teacher. He’s as completely forbidden to me as I am to him. We both know we can never cross that line, and yet, here I am, confessing to him that it bothers me that he was having a drink with another woman.

  It’s stupid. I know it’s stupid. I met him only yesterday, and yet the thought of seeing him again tomorrow fills my stomach with butterflies. Then again, is that so strange? Easton is about the most beautiful man I have ever seen after all. I’ve never felt such lust for anyone in my life. And his text messages…

  I just have to stay away. I need to avoid him at all costs—as much as possible anyway. As I walk home, I start to wonder. Will this be one of those things that’s more easily said than done?

  Watched

  “What question are you on now?”

  Looking up from my science exam paper, I frown at Liam. “I’m pretty certain an invigilator doesn’t ask the person sitting exams questions as they’re doing them.”

  His eyes flit away from the car magazine he’s reading, and when he catches my smile, he smiles back. In quick succession, he discards the magazine, throwing it haphazardly on the bed. The pages fly open, but then settle. “I’m bored,” he states matter-of-factly.

  I can’t help the frustration in my voice when I answer, “And how do you think I feel? Trapped here every day, never seeing daylight? It’s been six months now, Liam.” I exhale, giving away how angry I feel.

  “I’ve told you time and time again the reason why you can’t leave your room just yet. You’re still only fifteen. If they catch you they’ll take you away from me.” He rushes over, kneeling down in front of me before taking my hand. I see his own anger and frustration fade when he spots how sad I look. “When I was your age I was put into foster care and was abused by my so-called carers. I don’t want to see the same thing happen to you. I couldn’t bear it.” Kissing my hand, he takes a lock of hair and places it behind my ear with a gentle smile. “I promised myself when your mother passed that I would never let anything happen to you. I know I’m doing wrong, and I know I could get punished, but I swear that all of this,” he says, his eyes scanning the room, “is for your own protection.”

  I see the sincerity in his eyes, and it makes my heart melt a little. Every night, I cry over my mother’s passing, and every day, I take it out on Liam. “Why didn’t you ever tell me you were abused?” I ask, a deep, worrying frown forming at my brow.

  Looking down at his feet, he sighs before glancing back up again. “It’s not something you want to advertise.”

  “Didn’t you tell the police what happened?�
�

  He huffed, shaking his head in disgust. “And what do you think they would have done? I was an orphan—a troublesome kid—and the family I was staying with were church going pillars of the community. Who do you really think they would have believed?”

  With my free hand, I place it over his. “I’m sorry you had to go through that.”

  Liam fixes me with his glassy eyes, and it’s only then that I see the first hint of vulnerability in them. I was so angry when I first got here. Angry at Liam and then at the world when I started to believe that what he said was true about my mum. Over these past months, I have started to accept my fate a little more—slowly, but surely. Now, after revealing what he has, I can’t help but feel a little appreciative of what he’s given me. Yes, I know I’m still a prisoner, but I would much rather have this than the life he had after becoming an orphan. At least Liam looks after me. I’m fed and given plenty of books to read. Just the other day, he bought me a brand new Kindle and loaded it with tons of books. He also promised to give me more if I asked. It’s only the first generation Kindle, but it’s enough to get through the boredom. I never thought I would say this, but I miss school. I miss learning and reading. That’s why I’ve asked Liam to teach me like I’m still at school. He’s bought me some GCSE books and downloaded and printed some exam papers, so I’m getting the benefit of some sort of education. I’m still learning, and that’s important to me. I was supposed to do my GCSE exams in a month’s time, but I guess doing them here will suffice for now, and at least I’m safe.

  “Now can you understand why I keep you down here? No child should ever go through what I had to.”

  My eyes start to flood with unshed tears. I nod my head. “Of course I do. I just wish I had more freedom around the house. Maybe even let out into the garden for some sunlight.”

  He grips my hand tightly in his. “I promise you that I will give you all of that. Let’s just wait until you get nearer to your birthday. It’s not long now. I know just the present to get you as well. I promise you it’ll be the best sixteenth anyone has ever had.” His face lights up, making my own light up with it.

  “Really?” I ask, feeling a flutter of excitement in my belly.

  He nods. “Yes. Really.” Getting up, he points to my exam paper. “Now, let’s get this test over and done with, so we can mark it and get something to eat. I’m starving.”

  I turn to face my desk more, laughing as I do. “Okay then. I only have six more questions, and I’ll be done.”

  “Thank God for that,” he jibes, picking up the magazine and sitting back down on the bed.

  I watch as he starts to flick through the pages again and smile before turning back and concentrating on the task at hand. Only six more questions to go.

  A banging sound breaks me out of my trance. Shuddering at my memory, I frown when whatever that sound was comes to the forefront of my mind. I had been sitting in the library at school for the last two hours, trying to catch up on everything I’ve missed. I asked my teacher to throw everything at me, and it certainly is everything which she has thrown. Though I am a glutton for punishment, it has really helped to keep my mind from wandering to Easton, and that’s worth all the hard work in the world. I often find myself thinking about him when I’m alone. I don’t want to, but my mind wanders there anyway.

  Hearing that sound again—a thumping sound if I’m not mistaken—my heart starts thundering against my chest. I start to think all sorts of unsavoury things, but mostly I’m wondering if it’s Liam. I wonder if he’s found me and is planning to take me away again and trap me in that bedroom he said was mine.

  Shuddering at the thought, I quickly gather all of my paperwork as well as my science, English, and history books, and I roughly shove them into my backpack. I zip it up as quickly as I can. All the while, I have my eyes trained on the door like he will appear at any moment.

  With my heart rate reaching new levels, I rise out of my seat and cringe as the sound of the chair’s legs scrape against the linoleum flooring. The high-pitched squeak across the floor has my heart hammering even faster. I hate that he has reduced me to this. I live in constant fear that one day he’ll find me—that each day will be the day he does. I used to love that man, but ever since I’ve been treated for brainwashing, I’ve come to live with this fear of him that sometimes cripples me. I don’t tell my mum as she would worry about me, but this is my life, and this will continue to be my life as long as he’s out there somewhere.

  So, I run. I run as fast as my feet can carry me outside of the library and into the courtyard of the school. I’m gripping my bag in front of me like it is the only thing that can keep me safe. I look to the left, and then to the right, before sprinting down the end of the courtyard that leads to the exit of the school. I’m so frightened that I’m close to tears. I can either hear footsteps behind me, or the sound of it is in my head. Whatever it is, I don’t want to stick around long enough to know whether it’s just me going crazy.

  As I run, I hear another sound. I turn, trying to find the source—to see if it’s him—when I collide into a solid body. I scream, dropping my bag at the floor. It’s him. Finally, he’s found me. This will be the day where my free life ends.

  “Sasha, it’s me, Easton. Sasha, calm down, it’s me. Look at me.”

  I feel a set of hands grip each arm, but at first I’m too paralysed with fear to realise that I’m safe.

  “Sasha, please … you’re frightening me. What happened to you?”

  His soothing voice makes me look up, and it’s only then that I realise that it’s really him. “He’s here,” I say, not making any sense.

  Immediately, on alert, he looks up, his eyes are wide and darting around the courtyard. “Who’s here, Sasha, and where?”

  “I– I–” I start stammering, not knowing what to say. As my heart rate starts to calm a little, I realise how stupid I’m being. I’ve never shown anyone how frightened I am before.

  “Sasha, you’re okay. Talk to me,” he urges. His eyes focus on me, but also on the area around us.

  “I feel stupid now, but I could have sworn someone was here. I guess it was nothing, but at the time, I—”

  “Go to my office, and lock the door behind you. I’ll be back as soon as I can. I’ll knock five times. Got it?”

  “Easton, it’s okay. I’m sure it was nothing.”

  I feel him grip my arms tighter. “Sasha, go to my office now, and don’t open the door until I get back.”

  I see the determination in his eyes, so I nod my head. I feel him release his grip on my arms, and when I start walking, he watches me until I disappear into the hallway. I take a quick glance around me before running to his door. The hallway’s so quiet one could hear a pin drop. I doubt anyone is still here apart from me and Easton. Shit, I called him Easton instead of Mr Lockhart. If anyone had seen us, it would have looked suspicious.

  Chastising myself, I make it into his office as quickly as possible and lock the door behind me as instructed. My heart’s still hammering against my chest, but it’s easing with every breath I take.

  I take a seat, slowly trying to catch my breath, and by the time I hear the five knocks on the door along with Easton’s voice letting me know he’s the one knocking, I start to feel really stupid.

  Opening the door, I find him looking into my eyes like he’s trying to gauge my feelings. “I’m okay,” I answer, knowing that that is what he’s looking for.

  He steps in, closes the door, and hands me back my backpack, which I had totally forgotten all about. “That bag’s way too heavy,” he says in a chastising tone.

  “I have a lot to catch up on.”

  “Do you live far?”

  I frown, wondering why he’s asking. “No. It’s only a twenty-minute walk.”

  “I’ll walk you. I would take you on my bike, but I only have one helmet on me.”

  For the first time in the last ten minutes, I feel the need to laugh. “It’s okay, Easton. I can walk mysel
f.”

  “Not with that much weight. Also, you looked like something scared the shit out of you back there.”

  “You didn’t see anyone, did you? I knew I was going crazy.”

  “Sasha,” he says, walking the distance towards me, “just because I couldn’t find anyone other than us here doesn’t mean you’re going crazy.”

  Closing my eyes, I sigh. I suddenly feel exposed. “I’m sorry,” I answer, breathing out slowly.

  “What have you got to feel sorry for, lass? You looked scared shitless back there.”

  Looking up, I smirk. “My hero,” I say, chuckling. I notice the curve of his lips rise up in a breathtaking smile. “Do you dig the whole ‘damsel in distress’ thing, Mr Lockhart?”

  Shaking his head, he moves away from me and sits down on the edge of his desk. “I dig a lot of things, Sasha, but seeing a damsel in distress isn’t one of them. I take no joy in seeing you look the way you did. I’ve never seen someone so scared.”

  My smile soon fades. I hate that he’s seen me so open … so exposed to my fear. “It was nothing.”

  “It didn’t look like nothing.”

  Feeling flustered, I say, “Can we drop it? Please?”

  He visibly sighs, before answering. “Okay, but you can’t blame a man for worrying about you.”

  Deciding to change the subject, I look down at his feet and smile. “No Nikes today.” I look back up from his black loafer, tie ups, and find him smiling back.

  “Not when I’m working, no.”

  “Only when you kiss girls in bars.” Immediately, I close my eyes. I got carried away and became lost in the moment. It doesn’t take much when I’m in his presence. “I’m sorry, that was inappropriate of me.”

  He starts chuckling. “No offence taken.” He looks at my bag and then back up at me. “Do you need to carry on with some work? You can do it across the desk from me. I won’t disturb you.”

  I do need to do some more work, but there’s no way in Hell I would be able to sit across the desk of the most handsome man on earth and concentrate on work.