“Oh, now that you’ve seen my naked body, you’re here for a booty call?” Kaelyn snipes out, crossing her arms over her chest.
The mention of her naked body has me rewinding back to last night.
Fucking A.
Kaelyn naked is everything I always imagined, but the sad, anger-filled face that accompanied it wasn’t. I couldn’t enjoy her body because I didn’t want to see it like that, when she was just doing it to spite me, to show me what I was missing. But fuck, if that image isn’t something I want engraved into my mind for the rest of my life.
When I don’t answer, Kaelyn speaks again, “What are you doing here, Chase?” She glances down at her watch. “At six in the morning.”
“I know it’s early. I’m sorry. I’m here to apologize to you for ruining your birthday and—”
“Who says you ruined my birthday?” she asks defiantly.
I have to refrain from smirking. God, her sass is so damn sexy.
“Well, for starters, I’ve never had a girl strip naked for me with the intent of walking away before. I mean, I’m not that experienced with women, but I’m guessing women only do that because they’re either, A, pissed off or, B, want to show a guy what he’s missing.”
Her lips twitch as if she wants to laugh, but she’s able to keep the pissed off look on her face as she continues to stare up at me.
“Plus, I know a woman when she’s upset, and you ticked all of those boxes. I’m sorry. I never meant for last night to go down like that. I’m hoping that you’ll forgive me for being a total dick. If not, I get it, but there’s somewhere I want to take you this morning. It’s important.” I pause for a moment, trying to find my words, and when they don’t appear, I let out a heavy sigh. “I want to tell you why we can’t be together—at least, not right now. I wanted to tell you so badly last night, but I couldn’t find the words. I’ve kept this bottled in for some time now, and I’ve no idea where to start or how to speak the words…”
“Usually from the beginning,” Kaelyn tells me.
I smile, still hearing the attitude in her voice.
“I know, but that’s the hardest part because the beginning is kinda hazy and stems back quite far. It’s not just a long story; it’s why everything in my life is fucked up. It’s why, out of everything in my life right now, you’ve been the only good thing to come out of it. That night in the bar, since winning the Stanley Cup was the highlight of my year. You, Kaelyn, were the highlight. Not the beer or the football game that was playing, but you. You made me realize there was still a life outside of my very own, which honestly has only revolved around two things—my work and, well, something you’ll understand in the next hour. It’s just…I’ve never been good with words. I’m better at showing rather than telling, so instead of outright telling you, I think it’s best if I show you. They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and I think this applies to that hypothesis. If you see it, it’ll tell you more than I could ever conjure. I’m hoping, if you see it for yourself, that’ll be the hardest part out of the way, and I’ll be able to slot in the rest. Will you come with me, please?” I feel my bottom lip tremble with trepidation, the vulnerability like nothing I have ever felt before. My heart is threatening to shoot out of my chest. Just speaking these words are enough to break me out in a sweat.
Her face smooths out, and she drops her folded arms to the sides. “Why should I go with you? You made it clear last night that you didn’t want to open up to me, that you didn’t want to drag me into your mess. What’s changed between last night and this morning, huh? Other than the fact that you saw me naked,” she points out.
I let out a breathless laugh, one that’s more pained than humorous.
“Last night, I was an idiot, and what’s changed is that I’ve realized I don’t trust a whole lot of people, but I trust you because you’re the most honest person I know. You don’t pull punches, and you’re not afraid to speak up. You speak honestly and from the heart. Other than hockey, I’ve never had that, and it’s so refreshing.” I step forward and look Kaelyn dead in the eye. “I also realized that it should be your decision and not mine. You should get to decide what you can and cannot handle when it comes to my mess. After this morning, if you decide you want nothing to do with me—which, honestly, I think you probably will because this is something no one should have to willingly deal with—then I’ll let you walk away. No judgment, no foul.”
Kaelyn stews for a moment before she finally relents. “How long will it take? Just, I have a class at ten,” she explains.
“An hour, two tops.”
She nods. “Okay, I’ll go change.” Her eyes flash to my car parked behind me. “Go wait in your car. I’ll just be a few minutes.”
She turns and goes back inside, and I let out a breath of relief before I head back to my car.
A couple of minutes later, she lets herself into the passenger side of my car. She’s dressed in yoga pants, Nike running sneakers, the same blue Dallas Fire-Rescue Department hoodie she had on last night, and her hair is piled up into a messy bun. She puts her seat belt on before turning to look at me.
“Let’s go,” she tells me.
I switch the engine on, and I cringe at how loud the engine of my Ferrari sounds in a quiet street so early in the morning.
“I hope your neighbors are early risers. This car isn’t the quietest,” I say, but she doesn’t so much as crack a smile. I’m guessing she’s still upset with me.
After a mile or so down the road, I speak through the silence and point to the radio, “Do you want any music on?”
“No, it’s okay. I wouldn’t mind a coffee though. I’m kinda tired after being woken up at the ass-crack of dawn for a road trip,” she deadpans.
I glance at her, unable to keep the smile from my face when I come to a stop at a set of lights. “There’s a drive-through Starbucks a couple of blocks from here. If I get you a coffee, can I get a smile in return?” I grin.
She bites down on her lip, her face twitching. “Only if you throw in a chocolate croissant,” she bargains with a straight poker face.
“Deal.”
I get Kaelyn an espresso and croissant while I grab a water. I’m way too nervous to stomach anything right now, but Kaelyn seems to perk straight up at the mere sight of the coffee cup.
Note: Never turn up empty-handed at the ass-crack of dawn again.
In fact, never turn up empty-handed again. That’s if she wants anything to do with me after today.
I drive on, and she devours her croissant in just a few bites but savors her coffee as if it were the last coffee she might ever have. I can’t help but chuckle.
“If you wanted the coffee to last longer, I could have gotten you a coffee from the adult section.”
And, finally, I get a smile, and holy shit, it’s breathtaking.
“I only allow myself one coffee a day, and I make sure it’s the strongest coffee possible. Never judge a coffee by its size.” She’s quiet for a moment while she takes her final sip of espresso. “Are you going to tell me where you’re taking me, or should I assume you’re kidnapping me again?” she asks playfully, referring to yesterday.
My stomach drops when the place I’m taking her comes into view, and my palms become sweaty around my steering wheel. Shit, I didn’t anticipate how quickly we’d get here when there were zero cars on the road so early in the morning.
“We’re actually here.”
She focuses out of the window, taking everything in. At a first glance, it looks like a five-star retreat, and honestly, the inside isn’t much different. This place is so fancy that I have to ring the intercom at the gate before anyone can let me in. However, instead of it being a place to rest and heal, it’s where you go to die.
“Rose Dallas Medical Center,” Kaelyn says out loud as she reads the sign in bright bold letters.
I heavily gulp.
“Welcome to Rose Dallas Medical Center. Are you here to see a relative?” comes the soft voice through
the intercom.
“Hi, yes, it’s Chase Henderson.”
After coming here for five months, everyone at this facility knows who I am, and they know whom I’m here to see.
“Oh, hi, Chase. Let me buzz you through.” The gates slowly open, and I drive in the grounds.
Yep, it’s not your standard hospital.
I park, and for a minute, I don’t move. I just stare forward, unable to blink, unable to talk.
“Chase,” Kaelyn utters. “Why are we here, at a medical center? Is someone sick?”
I turn my head and glance at her. “Remember the whole a picture is worth a thousand words?”
She nods.
“Well, this is the part where I show you.”
We exit the car and head toward the entrance. I use my key fob at the entrance door, and at the flicker of a green light, I push the door open.
“Wow, this place is like Fort Knox,” she comments.
For the first time in the place that is hell disguised as heaven, I chuckle.
God, this woman.
There she goes, making me laugh, bringing me sunshine in a place where I’ve never even cracked a smile, let alone laugh.
Honestly, she is the only good thing about my life right now.
Kaelyn’s wide eyes take in the surroundings of the lobby that’s probably on par with Buckingham Palace; she’s clearly impressed.
“Stay here for a sec,” I instruct Kaelyn before making my way to the reception desk. A few minutes later, I return.
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah, I was just asking the receptionist for a favor since no one other than immediate family members are supposed to be here before eleven a.m.,” I explain. “Come on, let me show you why I brought you here.”
I lead Kaelyn up the elevator to the second floor. We come to a stop at room 204, and after several deep breaths, I open the door, stepping inside. Kaelyn stands idle at the door for a moment before I indicate with my head for her to come inside. I hear the hitch of her breath, and I realize she’s startled with what she sees.
There’s a blonde woman lying peacefully in a bed. She looks like any other woman who sleeps, except she has a ventilator tube coming from her throat along with tubes connected to various parts of her body.
Kaelyn doesn’t speak for a long while, and I just let her take it all in. Eventually, she finally asks the question I’ve been waiting for. “Who is she?” she says barely above a whisper.
I try to speak, but like I predicted, I can’t utter a word. Instead, I grab the chart from the end of the bed and show her the name that’s on the front of it.
Olivia Henderson.
Kaelyn gasps, obviously recognizing the name Olivia from the few times I’ve mentioned her name.
“Oh my God,” she chokes out. She looks to me and then back to Olivia with a mixture of shock, surprise, and horror. “This is your wife?”
I can only nod, still unable to find any words.
“Chase, what happened? I…I thought you were divorced. You made it sound…”
I look at her with regret, and Kaelyn’s eyes fill with unshed tears.
“Oh my God,” she repeats, covering her mouth with her hand.
I want to say something, but being inside the room with my wife and the woman I’m feeling way more for than I should makes it hard to take a steady breath, let alone speak.
A solid minute passes, and Kaelyn just watches Olivia with what seems like a million emotions running across her face. I watch Kaelyn, desperately wanting to know what she’s thinking.
“She’s so pretty,” Kaelyn comments.
She’s right. Olivia was beautiful. I mean, she technically still is. She’s here in the flesh, the machine breathing for her and her unborn child.
As soon as I think this, Kaelyn gasps for a second time before turning to me. “Jesus, she’s pregnant?”
Again, all I can do is nod. I can hear Kaelyn’s harsh breathing, and her eyes angrily narrow on me.
“Why would you bring me here? This is your wife,” she bites out in a whisper, her bottom lip trembling. “She’s carrying your baby. Jesus Christ, Chase. This is…” She shakes her head, backing up toward the door. “I can’t be here. This is your wife. I shouldn’t be here. It’s wrong.”
She rushes out of the room. I’m quick to follow her as she heads the wrong way, toward the dead end of the corridor.
“Kaelyn,” I finally speak.
She turns to me, anger still burning in her eyes. “You’re a fucking asshole,” she snarls, stomping toward me. “Why would you let me walk in there without a heads-up? I had no idea what to expect, but I definitely didn’t expect that. You should have warned me. I thought maybe I was going to meet your grandmother or something, not your wife, who’s in a coma, carrying your fucking baby!” she whisper-shouts. “You totally ambushed me in there. You need to speak. You need to tell me what the hell I just walked in on. You showed me what you wanted to show me. Now, you need to talk, or I’m walking the hell out of here.”
“Okay, but not in here. Let’s get some fresh air.”
Kaelyn reluctantly follows me to the elevators to the ground floor and through another corridor until we wander out to the garden that overlooks a pond. The early morning sunshine peeks over the horizon, giving the water a calming glow as twilight finally turns into day.
I lead us over to a bench, and we both sit. Leaning forward with my elbows resting on my thighs, I let out a heavy exhale. My heart hammers in my chest as I force the words from my mouth. “I’m sorry if I ambushed you by bringing you here. I should have told you what to expect or at least how bad it was, and I’m sorry for that. But, now, you know why it was so hard to tell you. I needed to show you before I explained.”
Keeping my position, I turn my head to her. I finally pull the Band-Aid off and let Kaelyn all the way in.
“My wife was a drug addict. I don’t know when it happened or why she turned to drugs, but after I made it to the NHL, she changed into a woman who was almost unrecognizable. I guess the fame of my success got to her.
“Five months ago, the night I won the Stanley Cup, Olivia overdosed on heroin. She suffered a cardiac arrest while the ambulance was on its way. The paramedics got her heart beating again and were able to assist with her breathing until they got her to the hospital. She was immediately put on life support, but because she’d been unresponsive for at least fifteen minutes before the paramedics got her heart beating again, the lack of blood flow and oxygen could possibly mean she’d be brain dead.
“After a CT scan, they confirmed Olivia wasn’t brain dead, but the doctor said the scan showed widespread swelling of her brain. They wouldn’t know how much damage she sustained until they properly assessed her. They evaluated her level of consciousness, and it was nonexistent. She didn’t open her eyes, didn’t respond to her name. She didn’t even respond when they applied painful stimuli. She didn’t seem to be aware of anything. It was clear that she’d suffered a good amount of brain damage and that she was in a coma, but it was too early to assess if the damage was irreversible or not.
“So, the next few weeks became a waiting game. As the weeks went by, it seemed she was improving, but only a little. She was responding to light, her gag reflex was returning, but she still wasn’t initiating her own breaths, and she couldn’t even swallow.
“Weeks then turned into months, and one day, she finally opened her eyes. I couldn’t believe it. It seemed like a miracle, but upon the doctor evaluating her, she didn’t seem to be aware of her surroundings, didn’t make any purposeful movements. They watched her closely for forty-eight hours, and when there was no change, they said she was in what they called a vegetative state, meaning she was awake but unaware. At the time, they didn’t know if that was temporary or an irreversible condition, but now that we’re almost hitting six months, the doctors don’t believe she’ll ever recover. They told me, because she suffered a hypoxic-ischemic brain injury—a lack of blood flow and oxygen
when she went into cardiac arrest—and she was showing no signs of improvement, that a good neurologic recovery was rare. Plus, with her still not breathing on her own, a full recovery is almost at one percent of the spectrum. If she does recover, then it’d be a damn miracle.”
I turn my attention forward and stare out at the water as I take a moment to catch my breath, my anxiety levels high as I finally open up about the hell that has been my life for the past five months, ever since Olivia overdosed.
“Chase,” Kaelyn speaks softly, hurt evident in her voice. When I look back at her, I see she’s clutching her hand to her chest, tears glistening in her eyes. “I am so sorry.” She gulps heavily before asking, “What does it mean for her in the long run? Will she be like this for the rest of her life?”
I nod my head, my heart breaking at the very thought. “Well, since she still isn’t able to breathe without the ventilator, the likelihood of her ever being able to breathe without it is impossible. The doctors have discussed this with me at length, but it looks like the only option is to switch her life support off, and honestly, it’s the option I find the kindest. I mean, if she can’t breathe and she’s in a vegetative state, then what kind of life would she ever lead? She’ll have no quality of life or a life period. Regardless of the state of our marriage before the overdose, she deserves better than to become a vegetable. She deserves the dignity to die peacefully. The only reason we haven’t gotten to that stage yet is because…”
“She’s pregnant,” Kaelyn finishes for me.
I give a single nod.
“How far along is she?”
“She’s thirty-weeks.”
I see the wheels go around in Kaelyn’s head, and I remember telling her last night how long it’s been since I last had sex. Suddenly, her eyes narrow with disbelief.
“You told me you haven’t had sex since before last Christmas. If that’s correct…then that can’t be your baby,” she says slowly, as if giving her brain time to catch up with this sudden bombshell.
“No, it definitely isn’t my baby,” I confirm.
Kaelyn lets out a whoosh of air before sinking down into her seat. “Jesus,” she swears, letting her head fall back, staring up to the sky.
My Forever (Our Forever Book 3) Page 12
