by Casey Herzog
“How the hell did I get here? I was downstairs with Damien having a lively discussion, when he suddenly went into convulsions. That’s the last thing I remember.”
William was rubbing his sore shoulder with no idea he was responsible for knocking the door down. It was barely hanging off the hinges, and the briefest wind was going to finish the job.
I tried to get up, but my legs felt like jelly. I collapsed and fell into his arms with our lips so close I could almost taste them. We looked at each other, and the heat of the moment was more than either one of us could bear.
“Have I ever told you I’ve always wanted to kiss you? I don’t know how many times I have used you to fuel my fantasies. I shouldn’t be confessing something like this; it’s not ladylike. I’ve seen you with other girls in school, and they hang on your every word without missing a beat. I wished with all of my might you would look at me like that. If you did at any time, then I didn’t see it, but maybe that was by design. You were afraid of my father. Are you sure that’s all there was to it?” I could feel the heat of his breath touching my lips and drawing me closer until only a mere inch remained to separate us.
“I told you I have been watching you from afar. You’re not the only one who has been thinking about doing something unheard of. These things don’t come easy for me. I usually just have to wait for a girl to approach me, but you’re different. I don’t know how much heartache I can stand without finding that love to make me live again. I was hanging on by a thread, and then your father died. I was a coward not to come to you sooner; I don’t have any excuses.” I could feel his broad chest pushing against my body, making all my nerves come to life at the same time. I was tingling from the top of my head all the way down to my toes and everything in between.
“I want to believe you, but you can understand my skepticism. I have dreamed of this moment, never believing for one second it was going to come true. I want you to hold me like this all the time, but how can I trust what you feel is real? I’ve been fooled in the past; just think about Mr. Coleman. He was always a good man, but he was a two-faced liar. You can’t possibly think I’m going to allow you to sweep me off my feet.” I knew that I loved him, but I was trying to be cautious in order to make sure he was playing by my rules.
“I’m thinking about how people fall in love in mysterious ways. It doesn’t matter if it’s just a fingertip or small smile. It all leads to me telling you who I really am. Having you this close is better than all of my fantasies rolled into one. I thought my fantasies were the only thing I had and it seemed impossible to me that we would be here looking at each other in this way. Maybe now, I can find the courage to show you how much you mean to me. I have been captured in your eyes for a long time without you even knowing it. You don’t have to believe me, but maybe this will prove to you once and for all that I’m on the level.” He leaned in closer so that our lips were barely touching, and then we were wrapping our bodies around each other like we were octopuses.
I felt his hand on the inside of my thigh sending signals that were obviously making his actions speak louder than words. I didn’t know how long it lasted until we finally pulled apart. I looked at him and was unsure what to say to convey to him I was convinced.
His hand was still on the inside of my thigh, and I never wanted him to take that hand away. It was hard for me to justify my actions. My father would never condone having a boy in the house, but he wasn’t around to make sure I was a good little girl. He had to know that by restricting my movements, I was going to do something that wouldn’t sit well with him. Having relations with the scruffs and talking openly about magic was risking discovery by the Elders. The hunter had made the scruffs go underground. It wasn’t right, but it was the only thing that could be done at the time. They wanted to rise up, but they didn’t have a true leader willing to sacrifice life and limb for the chance to bring magic back to the public. It was a gift, not a curse.
“You have an interesting way of convincing me of your sincerity. I thought we were worlds apart. In the mirror of your eyes, I see who you really are. I don’t think that you can fake something like that, but I still find myself wary of letting you in. I’ve shown you my flaws, and you’re still standing, which is a testament to your character.”
I wanted him to know that having him by my side was giving me the strength to fight the good fight.
“I know we are young and even thinking about something like this is to leave the Elders to do something drastic. Outside of these doors, we are susceptible to the link they have with all of our minds. It’s a good thing that when we are out of phase we can leave behind a phantom image of our minds in the real world. I don’t know how I’m supposed to keep away from you.” We left the bathroom with me looking back at the mirror and wondering what other little surprises were in store for me for the next two tests.
“Being afraid is not a good excuse, and we have used it as a crutch for way too long. Our lives will never be our own if we continue this way. I think I’m starting to understand what my father was trying to accomplish, and we owe it to ourselves to fight. The best way to do that is to quietly have others join the cause. I’m not saying anything that you don’t already know.” I felt better, but it was going to take some time before my energy returned. Then, I remembered what he had said about Damien. We had to get to him quickly. I was like his big sister. I had to protect him at any cost.
Chapter Thirteen
Damien had given me every reason to believe he was one of the strongest. His eyes were open, but there was nobody home. Trickles of blood ran from his nose, eyes, ears, and mouth. It had stopped and had congealed on his skin like a painful reminder of what I had put him through.
I checked for a pulse. He was still alive, but something was preventing him from coming back from the world I dragged him into. I had passed the test, but the price seemed a little too high in my opinion. I didn’t want to be alone and was thankful William was holding my hand.
“I would love to say I know what to do, but I don’t. I really didn’t take into consideration this could have such a high cost. I look at him and I see somebody who volunteered. He put himself in harm’s way when he didn’t have to. I’m the one to blame for his condition. How am I supposed to live with myself? The only prudent course of action is to take him back to the school.” I felt like I was falling apart; my mind was shattering.
“I don’t know too much about the test. Each person is different, but what I have been able to gather is that nobody is forced to do anything against their will. He could’ve easily refused to help. I would have never believed he had a selfless bone in his body. It really shows you never know who somebody is. He seemed lost, but you somehow found the real Damien underneath the caustic attitude.”
I wasn’t sure that I would say the same thing. I still felt that same animosity, but we had learned to rely on one another. “Damien is exactly what my father said; people have never given him a choice. Shoving your beliefs down somebody’s throat sometimes makes them feel they’re being made to swallow something they can’t. I gave Damien every chance to redeem himself in my eyes, and he has done that.” I looked at the kid and wondered if there were any way he would find his way back. I had no idea what he was going through and was just thankful he was still breathing.
“He never gave us any indication he wanted to be there. He always thought he was better than everybody else. He has an untapped energy that needed the edges smoothed out.”
I put my hand on his shoulder and watched my hand go straight through. Damien’s image swirled into nothing more than particles of dust. I took a step back, trying to figure out what happened, unable to wrap my mind around the fact he was here one minute and gone the next. It brought back the painful memory of my father and how he had left me abandoned.
“That’s not something you see every day. I’m totally at a loss for words. He seemed so real, and you even checked for a pulse. However, I have a feeling this isn’t the last time we�
��re going to see Damien. Don’t ask me why, but I think there’s more to the kid than meets the eye.”
I held onto William, grasping his shirt and tearing into the fabric with the grief I felt for losing my father, and now Damien as well. “My father would never forgive me if he were here to see me fail. Damien was supposed to be a great warrior in this battle between magic and the Elders. He was the one who was supposed to bring them to their knees. He just needed some fine tuning, and I was willing to work with him.” I had to give some thought to how I had taken away his magic and left him defenseless.
“Gillian, we are just going to have to soldier on without him. It won’t be easy, but we’ve had setbacks in the past, and we have always stood strong against whatever enemy comes our way. It won’t take the hunter very long to sense the power you have inside. I could try a spell to hide the existence of magic eyes, but I’m not sure how effective it will be. It’s up to you if you want me to try. Be warned, I don’t know if there are any side effects to worry about.” William was giving me an option, but I just didn’t think that it was a good idea to mess with something I didn’t fully understand.
I heard the door opening and then the stomping of boots just before the Guardians surrounded us. I thought for sure they were after me, but they never even gave us any thought. They turned everything upside down, and I was tempted to say something, but I knew better than to interfere in their duties. It was obvious that they had a one-track mind; Damien was the target..
A man with black hair and tattoos of symbols on his face came through the door with the Guardians standing at attention; everyone knew he was in charge. Nobody spoke as he stood there and looked around like he was going to see something that they didn’t.
“I know he was here; there’s no point in telling me differently. I want to know where he is. I would suggest you answer my questions honestly. Don’t everybody talk at once.” The leader of the Guardians was a man named Mr. Black. He was tenacious like a dog after a bone. Once he got something in his head, then there was very little anybody could do to change his mind. It was not going to be easy to lie to his face.
“I’m in shock. I don’t know who you are looking for, but the Elders know I have only a few weeks to get my family affairs in order. You come barging in without even announcing your presence and you expect me to take it with a smile on my face? Your friends have turned this place upside down. You can take a second look, but it’s not going to do you any good.” I was trying to be the voice of reason, but Mr. Black was staring at me with an intense hatred.
“I know all about you, Gillian. We have a very powerful ally who informed us that you are harboring magic. He said that it was a little boy. I know all about Damien and I’ve been looking for him. He has somehow eluded capture, and that’s not an easy thing to do without some kind of help.” He had on a black cloak and fancy pair of goggles known to have some amazing technology to see through walls. I would have given anything to have a look at what was underneath the mechanics.
“You’ve been over this place and I think you would have said something had you found a little boy hiding out. Your Guardians have informed you there is no little boy hiding within the premises. I don’t know what you want me to say. I’m still grieving the loss of my father, a pillar of the community. I don’t need this kind of hassle. It’s bad enough I have to leave here and hand over the family homestead to the Elders.” I needed to sound convincing. It wasn’t easy with Mr. Black looking me in the eye the entire time.
“I understand you believe I’m overstepping my authority, but what you don’t realize, little girl, is that I have the full support of the Elders. If you’re not careful, I might decide to detain you for further questioning. Of course, I won’t do that without a good reason. I haven’t seen anything to indicate you are lying.” He stood there, glaring in my direction.
“This has been a trying time and I would appreciate some privacy. My father was my world. It all came tumbling down on the day of his demise. I’m sure you have lost somebody in the past. You know what kind of toll that takes on you.” Mr. Black was not easily convinced, but he had nothing to go on.
“Your father was a good man until he started to spout nonsense in his class. His rhetoric and views on magic have been widely publicized. He just never knew when to quit. I do hope the apple falls far from the tree because I would hate to think you have taken up where he left off. I will be watching. You’ll feel me on the back of your neck when the hairs stand on end. You’ll wonder why you feel like somebody has walked over your grave. There will be nothing you can hide from me.” He was full of himself, but he knew what kind of power he possessed within the community.
Those who had thought about magic were put on some kind of list with no paper trail. Mr. Black was good at memorizing those names and keeping them for further updates. He wasn’t shy about letting the community know of his suspicions.
“The flybys of several drones had become the bane of our existence. We were being policed by the Guardians, but who was policing the Guardians? It was hard to justify the action perpetrated on those who spoke out candidly. The rules were well known, and stated emphatically at daily gatherings. Hearing the Elders’ speak was like fingernails down a chalkboard.
“You can stand on my doorstep all night; I won’t care. The only thing you’ll be doing is wasting your time. I wonder how the Elders will feel when they learn you used their resources to keep an eye on a grieving young woman. It could be a subject of great debate amongst the underground. Not that I would know where to find such a thing, but it wouldn’t take much to ferret out those willing to listen. A cause is only big when the numbers are greater than the adversary.
“It doesn’t matter, you probably don’t even understand what I’m saying. You take action without thinking about the consequences. I don’t know what my father was into. I heard the rumors, but he never did bring his work home with him.” I walked towards the door, standing vigil and motioning for him to leave without fanfare.
William was standing close by, but he had decided to keep his mouth shut. Their main concern was the occupant of this house. He was sure that, given time, Mr. Black would find a reason to use misguided judgment not befitting of a man of his standing. It was said that those tattoos were a painful reminder of those he had faced. The tattoos signified a kill to be memorialized.
“You’re just like your father. You can take that any way you want, but it’s not a compliment. Be careful about opening up something you can’t close. You don’t want me coming back here again. This first time was to search for the child in question. I want you to be aware there are eyes everywhere. I don’t need to be here to watch you or your friend.
“Why is William here? He has never shown anything that resembled practicing magic. If I had proof of magic being performed, then this whole thing would have played out much differently.” He stood in front of me as an intimidation tactic. He had me trembling on the inside, but I was holding my tongue and hoping my resolve would stay strong until he vacated my home.
Abruptly, he made a face and went out the door with the Guardians following suit. Not one of them showed me any concern or respect. They were following orders like good soldiers should.
“I could see the merit of raising an army against the tyrannical ways of the Elders. It was a matter of picking and choosing sides. There was something in the air. I didn’t want to believe war was inevitable, but I feared the world I knew was a powder keg ready to explode.
“You’ve made your position quite clear, Mr. Black. You can go back to the puppeteers and tell them there are no little boys here. I would be very careful because sometimes the Elders can be quite unforgiving. They assigned you a task and you failed to produce what they sent you after. I don’t know about you, but if I were in your shoes, I would be scared out of my mind.” He stopped on the sidewalk and looked back with judgment and condemnation in his eyes.
I could see that he was about to say something, but I didn’t gi
ve him the chance. I slammed the door and breathed a sigh of relief I had been able to stand up to him. The Elders were a force onto themselves, but they had made it necessary to delegate certain responsibilities. The role was given to Mr. Black, although nobody really understood how he came into power. There was no consensus and the community had no say in his placement. We had always believed we were a democracy, but that all changed when magic was forbidden.
It was subtle at first, with the Elders’ taking a more active stance against the use of magic. The action taken by them was never one discussed in an open forum. They were given the power to make things better, but they only got worse.
The Elders’ power grew, and before anyone knew what was happening, the world we knew had changed. A society built on trust was turned into something ugly over time. Those practicing magic were punished according to the three chances.
There were some who believed the Elders’ bypassed some of the safe guards, and there was no way to know if the three stages of the law were being adhered to. We had a chance to voice our concerns at the very beginning of magic prohibition, but nobody took advantage of it other than Jasper.
Chapter Fourteen
Was William even breathing? I was hoping we could stand against them together, but he had shown his true colors. I had to scrutinize him carefully,, wondering if working with him was only going to cause more problems than it was worth. He was afraid of saying anything in fear of retaliation. I didn’t blame him because I felt the same way. The only difference was, I didn’t allow it to hold me hostage.
