“We don’t do anything about it,” he said in that tight, harsh voice. Pru was beginning to find his gruffness very enticing. He was so wound up. What would it take to make him lose control? “We ignore whatever this is until it goes away.”
“Okay, but…what if it doesn’t go away?”
He frowned. “It will. It always does.”
Maybe for you. But Pru’s fascination with him had lasted five years and counting. She was beginning to wonder if she would ever get over him. Maybe what she felt for John Cahill was something a little more than infatuation. Or even hero worship.
Of course, she couldn’t tell him that. He was probably already second-guessing his decision to approve her transfer into SKURRT, and the last thing Pru wanted was to give him enough ammunition to boot her out. Her career still meant everything to her.
“I told you to stop that,” he warned.
“What?”
He ran a hand through his hair. “When you look at me like that…”
“Like what?”
He gave a heavenward sigh. “I must be out of my mind. If someone had told me two days ago that I’d be standing here contemplating kissing you in my own parking lot…”
He wanted to kiss her?
Pru thought her knees would collapse right then and there. “Maybe you should stop contemplating it and just do it,” she dared him.
“Didn’t you hear any of what I just said?” he asked in exasperation.
“I heard every word,” Pru said. “But I don’t think it’s going to go away.” It hasn’t for me, she wanted to tell him. Not in five years. “Maybe if we get it out of our systems…”
“Get it out of our systems,” he muttered. “What kind of cockeyed logic is that?” Almost against his will, he lifted his hand and ran his knuckles down the side of her face, wincing as if the feel of her skin was somehow painful to him. “What are we doing, Agent?”
“You were thinking about kissing me, sir.”
Before he could change his mind, Pru moved in closer. “And I happen to think it’s an excellent idea.” She tilted her head so that he almost had no choice. “It’s just a kiss, John.”
But it wasn’t. Not for her, and she suspected not for him, either. When his lips touched hers for the first time, it was one of those devastating moments that changed your life forever. Pru realized instantly that she was never going to be the same, and that knowledge frightened her even as she reveled in the feel of Cahill’s mouth on hers.
Wrapping her arms around his neck, she pressed herself to him as his hands moved up and down her back. She hadn’t kissed anyone in a very long time, and the sudden intimacy that sprang between them overwhelmed her. She was frightened, yes. Scared to death. But she didn’t want the moment to end. Ever.
She tingled all over. Her scalp. Her breasts. Even her fingers and toes.
Pru was pressed so closely to Cahill that she could feel his body react, too, and it made her want him even more. It made her want to rip off all her clothes and make love to him right there on the hood of her car.
They broke apart, then he kissed her again, even more frantically the second time. Pru stood on tiptoes, kissing him back just as desperately. She could feel his heartbeat. It was a wild, hard rhythm that reminded her of voodoo drums, and she saw him in her mind, naked by firelight as he lowered himself over her.
His tongue was inside her mouth. Deep and demanding. She met him thrust for thrust, and when he groaned, the drumming inside her own chest exploded with urgency.
When they broke apart this time, they were both gasping for breath. Cahill was visibly shaken, but he didn’t release her. Instead, he leaned against the car and pulled her to him. Gazing skyward, he said softly, “Houston, we have a problem.”
She gave a tremulous laugh. “I can’t feel my toes.”
“Agent Dunlop—”
“My friends call me Pru.”
His eyes glittered in the darkness. “We aren’t friends.”
They weren’t lovers, either. Not yet…
“This can’t go any further,” he said with grim determination even has his arms tightened ever so slightly around her.
“I understand.”
“Do you?” His voice lowered disapprovingly. “Then why are you still looking at me that way?”
“I can’t help it,” she said. “The way you kissed me just now…”
“It was just a kiss. You said so yourself.”
“Right.” But if it had been such an ordinary kiss, why couldn’t she stop shaking? Pru wondered. Why couldn’t he?
“I’m serious,” he said. “This can’t happen again, Agent.”
“Yes, sir. Sir?” She drew a quick breath. “If it can’t happen again, then maybe you should stop looking at me that way.”
JESSIE COULDN’T STOP smiling as she let herself into her dorm room. Sarah was already in bed, so Jessie was careful not to wake her. Tiptoeing to the bathroom, she changed into her pajamas, brushed her teeth and washed her face, then glided silently to her bed and crawled underneath the covers.
Pulling the quilt up to her chin, she stared at the ceiling as she thought back over the evening.
It had been…magical. That was the only word she could think of to describe it. First, they’d gone to see a movie, and then afterward, they’d strolled around the darkened campus, talking for what seemed like hours.
Jessie could have stayed out all night with him, she found him so fascinating. He wasn’t like anyone she’d ever known before, and she couldn’t get over how well he understood her. It was as if he knew everything about her, although he couldn’t possibly know about the rape. Her name had never been re leased to the public and she hadn’t had to testify at her attacker’s trial.
And yet he treated her as if he did know. It was as if he could somehow intuit her every need, her every fear.
That was because they were soul mates, he’d told her. And Jessie believed him.
He was never pushy or aggressive like some of the guys her age. He didn’t even touch her when he kissed her, except for that butterfly brush of his lips. And Jessie was beginning to want more. Tonight, she’d even leaned into him, subtly inviting him to deepen the kiss, but he’d pulled away, whispering against her ear, “Patience.”
“Patience,” Jessie whispered to herself.
Growing drowsy, she rolled over and closed her eyes. It was the first time in a very long time that she went to sleep smiling.
Chapter Eleven
“John, for God’s sake, do you have any idea what time it is?” Cahill’s ex-wife demanded the next morning.
“It’s almost nine,” Cahill said absently as he rifled through a file. He’d already been at the office for hours.
“It’s almost nine on a Saturday morning,” she grumbled. “You know I like to sleep in on my days off.”
Cahill heard a man’s voice in the background before she put her hand over the mouthpiece.
So the boyfriend had slept over. No wonder she needed her sleep.
Cahill waited for the inevitable pang of jealousy or a stab of resentment, but neither came. What he felt this morning was…strangely exhilarated.
He’d kissed Agent Dunlop the night before, and she’d kissed him back with the abandon and ardor of someone…well, someone ten years younger than him. The boost to his ego couldn’t be overstated. Cahill didn’t consider himself a vain man, but the way Pru had looked at him…the way she’d kissed him…
You are a legend, you know.
He wasn’t a legend. Not by any stretch of the imagination. He was a man who’d probably just made one of the biggest mistakes of his career.
And yet he didn’t regret that kiss. Instead, he found himself wondering when he might be able to kiss her again.
“John?” His ex-wife’s voice jolted him back to the present.
“I’m still here.”
“What’s so all-fired important that you had to call me this early on a Saturday morning?”
�
�Have you heard from Jessie?”
“That’s it?” she asked incredulously. “You’re calling to see whether or not I’ve heard from our daughter? For God’s sake, she’s only a few minutes from your apartment, not halfway around the world. You could have called her yourself. Or gone by to see her.” Why bother me? her tone implied.
“I’ve tried calling her for days,” he said tightly. “She’s been turning off her cell phone, and I never seem to catch her in the dorm.”
“She’s a freshman in college. She’s busy being a normal eighteen-year-old girl. Don’t take that away from her.”
“I’m not trying to take anything away from her,” he said defensively. “I just want to make sure she’s okay.”
“You have to stop this,” Lauren scolded.
“Stop what? Caring about our daughter?” he demanded.
“You know that’s not what I mean. You have to stop being so overprotective. You’re smothering her. Why do you think she wanted to live in the dorm? She needs her independence, and you have to find a way to let her go.”
“Let her go? She’s my daughter,” he said angrily.
“She’s growing up. Daughters do that.”
He ran a hand through his hair as he got up to pace his office. “I didn’t call for a lecture. I just want to know if you’ve heard from her.”
“She’s fine. Leave her alone.”
“Damn it, Lauren—”
“You can yell at me all you like, but we both know what this is about.” She lowered her voice. “You still blame yourself for what happened to her.”
Of course, he still blamed himself. If he’d been there that night—
“It wasn’t your fault, John. It wasn’t.” Her voice caught, and he heard her draw a deep breath. “You’d give your life to protect her. We both know that.”
Her words stunned him into silence. Since when had his ex-wife decided to be so generous?
“You weren’t there that night and I didn’t wake up,” she said softly. “We both have to find a way to live with that. You’re not to blame any more than I was.”
“There was a time when you thought I was,” he reminded her.
“I blamed you because it was easier than blaming myself,” Lauren said simply. “My God, I was there. I slept through the whole thing. Do you have any idea—” She broke off and sighed. “We can’t go back and fix it. What’s done is done. What we can do is move on. Make the most of our lives. We owe that much to our daughter.”
“You’ve changed,” he said, almost in awe. He could hardly get over it.
She laughed softly. “Yes, I guess I have. Maybe I’ve finally grown up, too. About time, wouldn’t you say?”
Cahill could hear her puttering around in the kitchen as she made coffee. It was a homey sound that made him feel at loose ends.
“What’s going on with you?” he asked suspiciously. “Why the big change? Is there something you want to tell me?”
She laughed again. “You always were perceptive. I guess that’s why you’re so good at what you do.” She sounded very young suddenly, and it reminded Cahill of the way she’d been years ago, before the bitterness and resentment had made her so unhappy. She’d always felt stifled by their marriage, and she’d never missed an opportunity to let him know it.
“I’m getting married,” she finally said.
Her announcement startled him, but he managed to recover. “Congratulations. When’s the big day?”
“Not until next spring. I want Jessie to have time to get to know him. He’s a great guy. I think you’d like him.”
“You sound happy,” Cahill said.
“I am. It’s been a long time coming.” Then realizing how her words sounded, she said quickly, “I didn’t mean anything by that. It’s just…well, I think we both know that we would never have stayed together for as long as we did if it hadn’t been for Jessie. We were never suited for each other. I wasn’t a good wife to you. I realize that now. I never supported you in your career. In fact, I probably made things worse because I never gave you a reason to come home.”
“We both made mistakes,” Cahill said.
“That’s true. But I don’t regret any of them because without them we wouldn’t have Jessie. We did something right together. She’s a beautiful girl, inside and out, and now she’s growing up. She’s growing away from us, and we have the opportunity to start our lives over. You’re still a young man, John, and if anyone deserves to be happy, it’s you.”
He didn’t know what to say to that. An emotion he didn’t understand welled inside him. It had been a long time since he’d concentrated on anything other than his job and his daughter. And now he was losing them both. Jessie was growing up and he was leaving the Bureau. What in the world would he do with himself?
“I want you to find someone who truly deserves you,” Lauren said. “Who truly appreciates the kind of man you are. But I don’t think that can happen until you forgive yourself.”
“You’re asking a lot for a Saturday morning,” he said gruffly.
She sighed. “I guess I am at that. Take care of yourself, John.”
Cahill hung up the phone slowly, almost reluctant to let his past, as unhappy as it had been, drift away from him.
The future suddenly seemed just a little too scary and uncertain.
BY THE TIME Pru got to Clare’s town house, it was a little after ten, but Tiffany was nowhere in sight. The property manager, a man named Grayson, had agreed to let them in, and as Pru wheeled into a parking spot in front of Clare’s unit, she saw him check his watch.
She got out of the car and hurried across the parking lot toward him. “Mr. Grayson? I’m Agent Dunlop.” She fished out her ID. “I’m meeting Tiffany Beaumont here this morning.”
“Looks like she’s a no-show,” he groused. “I can’t wait around much longer. I have an appointment in ten minutes.”
“Maybe you should just go ahead and let me in,” Pru suggested.
“Ordinarily, I wouldn’t do that.” He turned to unlock the door. “But if you can’t trust the FBI, who can you trust, right?”
Pity more people didn’t have that attitude, Pru thought as she stepped inside Clare’s town house. It would make her job a whole lot easier.
Grayson seemed reluctant to follow her in. He hovered on the threshold, his gaze darting about the interior. “Do you know what her family plans to do with this place?”
Pru shook her head. “Not a clue. I assume they’ll eventually sell it.”
“I don’t mean to sound insensitive,” he said, “but it’s bad for the whole complex if a unit sits empty for too long. Especially one with such an unhappy history. People start to talk. Rumors swirl. Before you know it, buyers stop asking about the place. I suggest they unload it as soon as possible.”
“I’m sure that’s good advice, but I don’t have anything to do with those kinds of decisions,” Pru said.
He shrugged. “Thought you might like to pass it along.” He glanced around again, and Pru thought she saw him shudder. “Are you sure you’ll be okay here until your friend shows up?”
“I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me.”
“All right, then. Don’t forget to lock the front door when you leave. I’ll stop by anyway just to make sure.”
“Thanks.”
The moment the door closed between them, Pru felt an odd sense of disquiet settle over her. The town house still contained all of Clare’s furniture and personal belongings, but somehow it had that strange, empty feeling that came with an abandoned property.
Slowly, Pru walked around the living room, trying to absorb the ambience of the place. If she closed her eyes, she could picture Clare at home that night, waiting for her would-be lover. She’d left work late so she must have been in a hurry when she stopped by the florist’s shop and the liquor store. Then she’d come home to set the stage for what she’d thought would be a seduction.
Pru’s gaze moved to the entrance as she imagined the scene
that had unfolded that night.
Clare drew back the door and smiled. He had a single red rose in one hand, and he held it out to her. “For you.”
She lifted the rose to her nose and inhaled the sweet fragrance. “It’s beautiful.”
“Just like you.” He stepped inside the town house and smiled at her approvingly.
She whirled in front of him. “Do you like my new dress?”
“Yes,” he said, his gaze darkening. “But I’ll like taking it off of you even more.”
Laughing, Clare lifted the rose again to her nose. “I thought of that, too, when I bought it. I’ve been thinking about it all day….”
He took her in his arms and kissed her, a deep, soulful kiss that made Clare tremble. “I want you,” she whispered.
“Patience.” He took her hand and led her into the living room. “Let’s have some champagne, shall we? Be a shame to let it go to waste.”
Pru moved over to the couch. The champagne bottle and crystal flutes had been taken to the lab for DNA analysis, but nothing had been found. The glasses had been washed and refilled with flat champagne before the killer left the premises that night. He’d taken great care not to leave anything of himself behind. He’d even washed his saliva off Clare’s body.
While he popped the cork, Clare settled on the sofa beside him. When he handed her a glass, she said breathlessly, “What shall we drink to?”
“How about a night to remember?”
She clinked her glass to his. “A night to remember. I like that.”
“Yes,” he promised. “You will.” He took the glass from her hand and kissed her again. “Put on some music. Something slow and sexy.”
Pru moved over to the stereo and sorted through the CDs. The one that had been playing that night was still in the changer. Sade.
When the music started to play, Clare turned, surprised to find him right behind her. She hadn’t heard him approach. He moved like a cat, she thought. Like a dark, sleek panther….
“Dance with me.” He held out his arms, and Clare glided into them.
Matters of Seduction Page 14
