F*cking Awkward

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F*cking Awkward Page 23

by Anthology

My silly heart sighs.

  I’m busy staring up at him like a lovesick school girl when he wraps an arm around my shoulder and opens the door.

  A round of applause has me stopping short and jerking back.

  What. The. Fuck.

  Four freshmen guys are sitting on the hallway floor, sporting shit-eating grins and snacking on popcorn. One by one, they proudly hold out a number on a sheet of paper. Ten. Ten. Ten. Nine point five.

  The last douchewad smiles like a moron. “Thought you guys needed to work on that dismount.”

  My face burns. Those little shits were listening to us having sex? And rating us?

  That’s when I realize our mistake. We usually turn on music or the floor is so loud with TVs blaring that we’ve never had to worry about eavesdroppers.

  I’m about to tell them to fuck the fuck off when Gavin laughs and pulls me closer to kiss my forehead.

  Then he turns to them with a shrug. “We were studying. Really hard.” How he says this with a straight face, I’ll never know. The boys snicker, and Gavin continues nonchalantly. “Besides, I love Clementine, so how we study with the door closed is none of your damn business.”

  Aww. I love hearing that he loves me.

  His eyes slide to me briefly, and then back to the guys. “Okay, losers, go get a life. I’m pretty sure my girl is about this close from shanking the four of you, so if you value your manhood, I’d run.”

  Those little dicks take one look at my expression and scuttle back into their rooms with nary a word.

  I turn to Gavin with an evil grin. “You do know me well. Shanking would’ve been my punishment of choice.”

  Leaning down, he kisses my lips and then winks. “My kind of girl.”

  * * *

  The End

  * * *

  How did Gavin win Clementine’s heart and get the self-proclaimed ice queen to fall in love with him? Read Dearest Clementine to find out how it was all in the name of academics. http://bit.ly/23WDoOW

  * * *

  Lex Martin is the USA Today bestselling author of Shameless and The Dearest Series. Subscribe to her newsletter to win signed paperbacks and swag, get sneak peeks at her upcoming projects, and receive bonus content. http://bit.ly/1R7JvZz

  Toytastrophe

  Liv Morris

  “What time does your plane land at Logan?” my wife, Marilee, asks. “We have dinner reservations at seven.”

  “Earlier than normal,” I say as my wife sighs into the phone. One of relief versus frustration, I hope. “I get in just before three. I should make it home in plenty of time to feed the kids and take them over to your folks.”

  “That would be perfect. Thanks so much, Jon.” Another sigh makes its way over the phone line. This one sounds different. “This week has been exhausting.”

  “I’m sorry baby. I’m on my way to take care of the kids and my sexy wife.” I emphasize the word sexy.

  “Right. If you could see me now.” She releases another sigh, which adds up to one worn out mother. “Though, I’ll spare you the details of my mommy clothes. Better run and see what the kids are doing. They’ve gone silent.”

  “Marilee. I love you.” The conversation ends with her yelling in the air for the kids to come out of wherever they’re hiding. The likely spot is under the front stairs.

  I’m checking out of work early this Friday because tomorrow is my thirtieth birthday, and Marilee has planned a weekend away from the kids. Her parents are watching them while we escape to a nice hotel, courtesy of my traveling points with Hilton.

  I can’t remember the last time we had an entire weekend just to ourselves. I have only one thing on my mind, and that’s fucking my wife silly! See, my job takes me all over the country. I’m away almost every week, Monday through Friday, and it’s wreaked havoc on our marriage. Not the horrible marriage-ending kind of issues, but the too-busy-to-connect-like-we-should troubles.

  In layman’s terms, I miss the shit out of my wife. We communicate via text during the weekdays. She calls me when she has two seconds, which is usually late at night after our four-year-old son, and two-year-old daughter are sound asleep.

  At the end of the day, when we actually get on the phone, at times, she falls asleep while I’m talking to her. It breaks my heart that we both end up going to sleep alone.

  My friends call me pussy-whipped and I don’t deny it. I handed my man card over to her the night we met at Boston College our freshman year. My sweet, sassy, southern-raised wife stood out amongst all the other eligible women.

  I swear the men flocked to her like she was the reincarnation of Scarlett O’Hara. When her eyes landed on me, and she smiled that sexy way she does, I was hers or wanted to be hers in that instant. After a few days of begging her to go out on a date with me, she caved.

  I was the total player brought to his knees by a one hundred and ten-pound spitfire, and I’ve never regretted making her mine.

  I am sitting across from my wife at the fancy pants restaurant at our hotel. The kind that has white table cloths, and a guy who brushes crumbs off them. We’re both dressed in our swankiest clothes, but I would’ve preferred room service upstairs and being dressed in nothing right now. Not to mention being buried balls deep inside of her. All I could think about on the flight home was fucking her senseless. It’s been a long week and I didn’t get my fill of her last weekend. I don’t think I ever will.

  Marilee fixed herself up while I dealt with the kids and got them to my in-laws. When I returned home from dropping off our brood, she’d transformed into this beautiful creature sitting across from me.

  Her baby blue eyes dazzle me and her red lips make me lick mine. Her long brown hair curls in waves just touching the top of her breasts. Ones I wish I had in my hands and mouth. She’s wrapped herself in this daring red dress that shows off her glorious cleavage and makes me have to sit on my hands.

  “So, I’ve been shopping online,” Marilee says as we finish our meal. “I’ve bought some toys,” she whispers that last part.

  “Those kids have enough stuff lying around the house. Are you sure they need more?” I place my napkin on my plate and push it toward the table’s center.

  “Well, I wasn’t shopping for the kids,” she says adding a sly smile. I tilt my head and squint one eye at her.

  “Who were you shopping for then? One of the neighbor kids have a birthday coming up?”

  “I was shopping for us.”

  “Us?”

  “Toys for us.” She gives me a half wink and another flirty smile.

  “Well, fuck,” I say under my breath. I’m ready to jump out of the chair, throw her over my shoulder, and carry her up to our room. “Tell me you brought them with you.”

  “Fully charged and sitting upstairs in my suitcase.”

  I raise my hand and call over our server. “Check, please.”

  Marilee got a call from the kids as we rode up the elevator to our suite. They wanted to say goodnight before they went to bed. I was pissed when she took the call and stayed on the phone for over fifteen minutes. Don’t get me wrong. I love my kids. They’re the main reason I work so fucking hard, but I want to focus on Marilee this weekend. Get back to the reason we are a family and where it all started, and that’s with us as a couple.

  Now I’m pacing outside the bathroom door while Marilee changes into something sexier. I tried to tell her wearing nothing at all is as sexy as can be, but she has something new to wear. I caved because it’s not worth fighting over and I want to make her happy.

  “Coming, Jon,” she calls from inside the bathroom.

  “You bet you will be,” I reply. I stop in front of the still closed bathroom door and place my hands on the top casing. I’ll be blocking her when she finally decides to appear.

  “I hope so,” she says while opening the door. I smile down at her petite little body dressed in a black lacy number that I can see through. Her hard nipples are greeting me and my hard-on is greeting her too. I forgot to mention I have
nothing on.

  She bites her lip while glancing down at my dick, and then looks up at me with a night full of sexy promises in her eyes. I want to growl back at her. Instead, I scoop her up in my arms and toss her on our king-size bed.

  I look down at her lying on the white cover of the bed, legs slightly spread and showing me what’s mine. I can’t take the build up need anymore, and I fucking lose control. I grab ahold of the lacy scraps of cloth covering her and rip them to shreds. I’m pretty sure the growl I hear is mine.

  “Jon,” she pants my name as my hands roam over her now naked body. “What’s gotten into you? Not that I mind.”

  “I think it was the word toys,” I answer while kissing my way down her stomach to the Promised Land.

  “Suitcase,” she says between short breaths. “Top part.”

  I side-eye the suitcase and wonder if I should wait for the second round to pull out the toys, but hell, I’m too curious to see what she bought.

  I give her clit a few more licks for good measure and rise off the bed. I walk to the suitcase and fling it open. I unzip the top part and dig around in it. I feel a rubbery something with a round circle and a hard, long piece of plastic. I pull the two things out and see she really has taken the dive into the sexy toy pool.

  A cock ring and a pink vibrating dildo are sitting in my hands. I shake my head at her with a teasing smile on my face.

  “Look how naughty you are,” I scold her in fun while holding up the toys for her to see.

  “I’m very naughty or want to be,” she replies.

  “Just keep those legs spread for me and I’ll show you naughty.”

  With lightning speed, she parts her legs and eases up on her elbows. Anticipation and desperate need are in her eyes. I plan to give her everything I can to turn her need into total bliss.

  I switch on the vibrating dildo and find a medium speed. The thing also twirls on the end. Pretty damn clever. I sit it on the bed so I can examine the cock ring.

  It’s rubber and bendable with a small vibrating attachment. Another clever device.

  “I am liking the vibrations, baby,” I say with a wink.

  “It’s supposed to prolong your pleasure.”

  “I’ll need it tonight. I’m already on the edge.”

  I pump myself a few times to get completely hard and begin to slip the ring around my dick. I’m a little above average in the length department, but extra-large around. My girth took Marilee some getting used to during our first few times together. After that, she fell in love with what it did to her.

  I have to force the damn thing down my dick and it’s not feeling pleasant either, but once it’s settled on the base, I’m good to go. I flip on the vibrating switch and damn, it creates an awesome sensation on my balls.

  “You ready?” I ask Marilee and she nods her head. “Good, my naughty girl.”

  She lies back and I bring her hips to the edge of the bed. I finger her until she’s nice and wet. I take the still vibrating dildo and start inserting it inside of her. She moans as I do it and that’s all the encouragement I need.

  I switch the vibrator to high and she raises her hips in response. “Like?” I ask.

  “God, yes,” she whimpers. “Please don’t stop.”

  “Never,” I say and I add my tongue to the mix.

  “Oh, my God,” she screams as I draw her clit into my mouth and suck.

  Her legs begin to shake and her hands claw through my hair. She’s so damn close. I twist the vibrating joystick inside her and she goes off.

  “Fuckkkkkk,” she yells while arching her back. I continue to use my tongue until she pulls my head away, fully satisfied.

  “Good?” I ask while standing up and tossing the dildo to the side on the bed.

  “You have no idea,” she breathes.

  “I hope to find out. Now.”

  I position my cock-ringed dick at her entrance and push forward. I still once fully seated and we both let out a cry. Damn, she feels so good around me. She always is tighter after an orgasm.

  The bed is the perfect height for me to stand and thrust into her. I place my hands under her sweet ass and hold on tight.

  I begin a hard pace, and she meets each push of mine with a thrust of her own. I have to admit the damn cock ring and its vibrations are increasing the feelings like she said they would.

  Her breasts are bouncing with each push, and I want and need them in my mouth. So I bend over and take a hard nipple between my lips and lightly graze it with my teeth. The entire time I’m still working close to an epic orgasm. I can just feel it’s going to be one for the record book.

  She brings a hand to each breast and positions them perfectly for me. I go from side to side, licking and sucking until I’m getting so close I can’t take it and have to stand up.

  When I do, she continues where I left off and twists at her nipples. I stare into her eyes and the look that passes between us sets me off. A wild sensation ripples through my lower back to my balls and I explode inside of her. I keep pushing and coming like I never have before. It’s a fucking epic fuck.

  I’m still pulsing deep within her when I collapse down next to her on the bed. She wraps her legs and arms around me like a sexual blanket of love.

  “I’ve never,” I spit out through puffs of breath.

  “Me either,” she says while brushing the hair from my sweaty forehead. “The toy and your tongue. Jeez.”

  “The same for the cock ring.” My breathing is still ragged.

  I pull out of Marilee and roll over. I’m shocked to see that my dick is still full and hard.

  What the hell?

  Trying not to panic, I reach down and fiddle with the cock ring, but it doesn’t budge. In fact, my dick is swollen over the ring. Not a good sign at all.

  “Marilee?” I ask turning toward her. “I need your help here.” I glance down at my dick.

  “Oh no,” she says when she sees the cock ring isn’t going to come off naturally. “Let’s go into the bathroom. Wet it down.”

  She’s gone into full mother mode and I’m okay with that, because I need this damn thing off before my dick falls off.

  I walk into the bathroom with my throbbing, and not in a good way, dick in my hand. Marilee ushers me to the sink and turns the water on. Once it’s a comfortable temperature, she suds up her hands with some hotel soap and rubs them over me.

  Her touch helps with the throbbing, but not with cock ring. The thing is cemented on me. I’m starting to sweat and worry.

  “Why isn’t it going down?” she speaks to my dick and me.

  “I don’t know, but it’s not a good sign. Maybe I’m too big for the ring?”

  “I need a pair of scissors,” she states matter-of-factly.

  “What?” I squeal like a twelve-year-old girl. “No!”

  “Yes, I can’t get the damn thing off,” she says in frustration and walks away.

  I follow her like a sick puppy still holding myself. She picks up the phone on the nightstand and hits zero. I sit down on the bed and wait to see what she says.

  “Yes, I need a pair of scissors brought up to room 715, immediately. It’s an emergency.” She goes still while the other person responds.

  “Well, there is something wrapped around a part of my husband and I can’t get it off.” She throws a hand on her hip as she speaks. Again she is quiet after talking.

  “That’s better. I’ll meet the bellhop at the door.” A couple seconds pass.

  “For Christ’s sake. Yes, we will be dressed.” She slams the phone down on the receiver.

  “Idiots!” She shouts into the air. “They made me tell them why I needed the scissors and why it was an emergency. So I told them the truth, because I don’t want anything happening to our sweet baby maker.”

  “Baby maker?” I can’t believe this. Now she’s bringing babies into this debacle. I’ve asked her if she wanted any more kids for a few months, because I’d like to try again.

  “Well, I wa
nted to talk to you about that this weekend. I want one more too.” Her smile is weak at best, but it works.

  “Hot damn. Then we better get this fucker off me a.s.a.p.” There’s a knock at the door a split-second after I said that.

  “Oh shit. Clothes!”

  “Bathrobe.”

  “Right.” She scrambles to the bathroom and comes out wrapped in a plush white robe.

  “You better hide.”

  “Fine.” I scoff and shuffle to the bathroom, but leave the door cracked a smidge so I can hear what’s going on.

  I hear her feet pad toward the door and a click as she opens it. “Hello,” she greets the deliverer of my hopeful relief.

  “What do you mean he has to sign for them?”

  What? I have nothing on. I scan the bathroom for another robe and see only towels perfectly placed on some shelving.

  The place is too damn cheap for his and hers?

  “Okay. But I’ll have to take the form to him.” She says in a pissed off tone.

  The door flings open and she’s standing there with a sour face, and a white form in her hand along with a pen.

  “Sign, please.” I take the paper and scribble something on it and pass it back to her.

  She turns on her heels and heads back to the door. A few seconds later she’s back with scissors in hand. I’d like to say I am feeling hopeful, but the sharp edges and pointy ends make me queasy.

  “Sit on the toilet,” she orders me and I do as she asks.

  “Will it hurt?” I am sounding like a child now and feeling like one too.

  “Close your eyes. I promise it will be fine.”

  I close my eyes tight and cover my ears. I don’t want to see or hear a thing. Unfortunately, I can feel everything, though.

  Her fingers pull on the cock ring and I want to scream to the roof, but I hold my tongue. I am thinking they should’ve brought up a shot or two of scotch along with a bullet to bite down on.

  Cold metal touches my skin and I freeze in place. I might be saying a prayer to every known deity too.

 

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