by Arizona Tape
I placed a hand on her lower arm, sparks shooting through my body. Yes, definitely Ashleigh.
"I'm sorry..." I apologised, earning a surprised look.
"For what?"
"For being so harsh... For expecting too much from you?"
She briefly smiled, but it never reached her eyes. "I don't understand why I couldn't do a thing... I should've been able to..." she muttered, disappointment clear in her voice.
"It's okay..."
"Is it? What if next time you're the one in danger and I can't help you?" she growled, her hands balling into fists. As if it hadn't been clear before, she was probably beating herself up over this. Nothing I said would've made her feel worse than she already felt.
Just knowing that, knowing that she thought she had let me down, filled my chest with a warmth I hadn't felt before.
She cared. She genuinely cared. She barely knew me, but it didn't matter. She wasn't torn between two people, weighing qualities, gauging who was the better fit. For her, I was the one and only. I had always been. I knew I was.
I recalled how she always stared at me, always lingering in the background, one eye on me, on eye on her own task. How she was always watching out for me, making sure I was okay.
Why hadn't I realised that before? Before all this, before my disapproving look...
She was the one. My mate. Of course, it was her.
And as this realisation flashed through me, another thought quickly followed. Now that I knew she was the only one I truly wanted, I couldn't screw it up. And that thought, that terrified me.
Before, I had the luxury of two people wanting me and me wanting two people. If it went wrong with one of them, I could just gravitate to the other. Like a real coward.
But I didn't want to be a coward anymore. I wanted to do this right. I wanted to be the mate that Ashleigh deserved. And I would prove that I was just as perfect for her as she was for me.
Ashleigh. Of course, Ashleigh.
Mine.
I placed both my hands on top of hers, gently pushing them open as I intertwined my fingers with hers. "If I were in danger, you'd come through."
"What if I won't?"
"You will."
She snorted sarcastically, pulling her hands out of mine. Ouch, that stung.
"You're probably better off with Aspen," she scoffed, her head turning to the side as she refused to meet my gaze.
Hell no. Just when I had made up my mind and decided to go hundred percent for her, she was wavering? I wouldn't let her.
I grabbed her hands again, refusing to let her give into the doubt.
"Look at me."
Ashleigh pretended like she couldn't hear me, so I gently squeezed her hands. "Look at me," I asked again, my voice much softer.
Slowly, she turned her head, finally meeting my gaze. Her beautiful blues that were usually filled with sparks, were now brimming with sadness. Disappointment, regret, and guilt were all swirling around in them and just looking at her, made me ache for her.
Knowing that I could be so affected by her emotions by just staring in her eyes, I knew I had chosen right.
Mate.
"I want you," I spoke, my voice surprisingly strong and unwavering. With Aspen deep inside the cave, things were all so much clearer. How had I been so confused before?
Ashleigh stared back at me, studying my expression, probably searching for any hesitation. When she couldn't find any, she asked in a small voice: "Why me?"
"You are my mate," I said, quite surprised. Why not her?
"So is he," she argued, her face falling at the thought of me being with her brother.
"I don't want him."
"Then you are the first," she bitterly spat out as her gaze fell back to the ground.
"What is that supposed to mean?"
She chuckled, but nothing about it sounded cheerful. "I was born thirteen minutes after my brother. Thirteen minutes was all it took for him to have a headstart on me for life."
I silently waited for her to elaborate, not wanting to ruin the moment.
"My family has had a one-child policy for as far back as we go. There have never been twins in any of our lines before. I wasn't wanted."
Ashleigh bit her lip as her eyes glazed over. "My parents loved me, of course they did. They always tried to treat me the same way. And don't get me wrong, I love my brother. I love him to bits. He was always the one sticking up for me, trying to make me feel equal."
Another silence befell us. I patiently stared at her, knowing that this wasn't the end of the story. But when she kept quiet, I tried to catch her gaze again.
"But?" I asked, gently encouraging her to keep going.
"But... Besides being the firstborn, Aspen is an Alpha as well... As much as he loathes having that kind of power, he can't control it. Not well. Not always. And I can't blame him for it. He is first, he will always be first."
I frowned my brows as I hadn't realised how insecure Ashleigh felt about her relationship with her brother. Whenever they fought or bickered, it always seemed like she had the upper hand.
She snorted, briefly shaking her head. "I have worked my whole life to be better than him. Faster, smarter, stronger. When he is just Aspen, my brother, I am. But when it comes to Alpha Aspen, I will never measure up," she sadly said, like she had read my mind. "This is why he is so aloof and relaxed. He knows he doesn't have to try. Whereas me..."
"You are you," I quipped in, taking a step closer to her. "And you are the one I want."
"How can you be sure?"
I placed her hand on my chest, as I drew my wolf to the surface.
Mine. She growled possessively, immediately connecting to the black wolf inside Ashleigh. The dark-haired woman audibly swallowed, before meeting my gaze.
"Thank you," she softly murmured, the corner of her lip tugging up in what was her first real smile since we started our conversation.
"Any time," I breathed, the world stopping as she pushed a stray lock of hair from my face.
"You are beautiful," Ashleigh whispered, making my cheeks heat up. Only she would think so.
"So are you," I smiled back, loving how her eyes lit up. She chuckled briefly, shaking her head in amusement. And as she did, I was suddenly surrounded by the scent of wild strawberries. My favourite.
I bit my bottom lip, trying to contain the smile threatening to break out on my face.
"You really are something else," my dark-haired mate grinned, her thumb still caressing my cheek.
A shadow fell over my face. It took me a second to realise Ashleigh was the one casting it. She was bringing herself closer to me, her lips inching closer and closer.
Was this it? Was she going to kiss me?
I hastily wettened my lips, a nervous jolt jumping through my body. Would we be alone long enough for us to finally? How would it feel like? Was nobody going to interrupt us? No jealous Aspen, no annoying Darren?
Before anymore thoughts could run wild through my head, Ashleigh's warm lips found mine.
I stopped. The world stopped.
My wolf exploded in happiness as she rampaged through my chest together with her mate, both howling as they ran after each other.
Ashleigh's soft lips moved against my own, warm, gentle, moist. She did taste like a combination of cherries and wild strawberries and I couldn't help but sigh against her.
How had I managed to go so long without kissing her?
As she nipped at my bottom lip, a shiver shot up my spine as I could feel myself slowly unravel. Perfectly unravel into her.
Ofcourse, Ashleigh. How had I ever had any doubts about that?
Her thumb stroked my cheek once more, before she pulled away, leaving me hopelessly wanting more. She let her forehead rest against mine and for a moment, we just breathed. We breathed each other. And we stood still, in the midst of a silent world. Just her. Just me. Just us.
She was the first who broke the silence. "We should go inside," she murmured, her voice almost disa
ppointed.
I nodded in agreement, suddenly noticing how cold my limbs had grown. How long had we been standing here?
With a newfound certainty, we strutted inside the cave, my pinky brushing over the back of her hand. But with every step I took, with every step closer to Aspen, I could feel my resolve waver.
And I couldn't stop it. I wanted to stop it, but I couldn't. As I approached Aspen and was hit with the residue of his Alpha, my wolf grew more and more hesitant.
And I loathed it.
I didn't want to feel this way. I wanted Ashleigh. Only Ashleigh. But Aspen... He called out to me, to my wolf.
Why did I feel this way? Why couldn't I stop it? Did I want to stop it?
I threw a helpless look at Ashleigh, hoping she could help me, but was just met with a saddened smile.
"It's okay. That is just how it is," she soberly shrugged, like she hadn't expected anything else.
I opened my mouth to protest, to tell her it wasn't like this, but she had already added herself back to rest who were all getting ready for bed. Like nothing had happened between us, she casually asked Regan how he was feeling, almost deliberately ignorning me.
So much for making my mate feel reassured...
I sat down on my furs and listened to the all too familiar whining from my wolf as she tried to decide between Aspen and Ashleigh. So much for our kiss. Stupid wolf.
I wanted Ashleigh. Why wouldn't my wolf listen to me? I groaned as I let myself fall down in my "bed". Couldn't this night just end? As soon as I hit my furs, I realised just how tired I was. Had all this really happened in one day?
Completely ready to escape all the turmoil, I happily closed my eyes, ready for sleep. I had almost forgotten about the whole Cece thing, untill I was pulled out of my slumber by a whisper.
"Hey, pssst, Akira."
My eyes fluttered open as I stared at Cece. "What?"
"I am bored, can we play?"
I shook my head. I was too tired to play. "It's time to sleep..."
"But I am not tired," she pouted, her yellow eyes shimmering innocently. Ofcourse, she wasn't tired, freaking cat.
"Try to sleep, we can play games tomorrow..."
"Shhhh, we are trying to sleep here!" Danny suddenly growled from her corner, her voice a tad higher than usual.
As if she couldn't even hear the redhead, Cece happily babbled on. "What do you guys do for fun?"
I groaned, as I pressed my eyes shut. I was tired, it had been a long, stressful day. I couldn't believe how long of a day it actually had been. I just wanted to sleep. "Can we not talk tomorrow?"
"Yeah, be quiet," Darren chimed in and I seriously suspected he was looking for a rock to throw at the Puma.
"So, where are you going, Akira?" Cece inquired, totally ignoring all the glaring eyes prickling in her back. It was like she couldn't even feel them.
I groaned, deciding that I didn't have the energy to keep debating with her. Answering her questions was probably easier. "East," I muttered vaguely, hoping it would shut her up.
"The East? You don't happen to be heading towards Coyote Country, are you?"
A collective groan was heard as the whole group just knew what the next question was.
"I can guide you, if you want. I know how to get there," Cece happily chirped in, as she twirled her long hairs around her fingers. She seemed totally oblivious to the angry snarls she was receiving from Darren and I wasn't sure if she was just pretending to piss him off even more.
"Of course you do, you traitor..." I heard Danny mutter under her breath, but loud enough that everyone could hear it. She tended to do that a lot, now that I thought about it.
"What? Coyotes like me," the Puma innocently smiled, looking far too happy with the bow she made from her own hair.
"Can we just stop the bickering and go to sleep? If not for me, then for Regan. He needs rest." I proposed, a heavy sigh escaping from my lips. I really wasn't in the mood for more fighting.
"Sure. But am sleeping with my knife under my pillow."
Darren's grumble was followed with a snort.
"You always sleep with your knife under your pillow. Am surprised Danny hasn't gotten jealous yet," Aspen mocked, earning him a growl.
"You are the one that made the call to keep her alive. And now she is sleeping in our cave. Excuse me for being a little bit sceptical," he sarcastically called back, as he angrily threw a little rock against the wall.
"Watch your tone."
"You watch it."
"Guys!" Danny called out, knuckling Darren over his head. "This is not the time, nor the place."
I threw the redhead a grateful look and mouthed a quick thank you. She was right. The tension definitely was running high, even for this group.
With a grumble, Darren demonstratively placed the knife under his head, while Aspen let himself fall down next to me.
Somehow there was an unspoken agreement that we slept in two piles of people. Danny and her men and me with my... Twins... Yeah, go me. Hurray. Totally not awkward.
I briefly feared that Ashleigh would't join me tonight, not after how my wolf had turned on her. A sigh of relief escaped from my lips as she seemed to be done thinking and let herself fall down on my other side.
Danny kissed her three men good night and my wolf briefly wondered if I wouldn't be able to get a situation like that going. Maybe Ashleigh wouldn't mind... Maybe...
As I felt my eyes grow heavy and my mind fuzzy, I pondered it over one more time. Maybe...
Maybe one day...
Maybe...
One day...
Maybe...
I felt two soft hands glide over my thighs, gently, like they were almost afraid to touch me. They were followed by a breath that sent shivers down my spine and goosebumps to my skin. I felt the hot air travel up my legs and I sucked in my own in anticipation. I pressed my eyes shut, not daring to move one inch. Just a little bit more...
But right before the mouth reached my core, a second set of hands touched my legs.
What?
My eyes shot open as I bounced up.
"Why do you get to touch her first?" Aspen's voice reached my ears before I could make out the scenario in front of me.
The twins were both sitting on either side of me, each with one hand on my thighs.
"I am her first mate, aren't I? I get first dibs," Ashleigh argued, as she slapped her brother's hand away.
"No fair, I got here first."
"Only because I let you."
"Please, you couldn't catch up on me if I hopped on one leg."
"I could take you down with one hand behind my back."
"I could satisfy Akira with one hand behind my back."
Ashleigh snorted loudly as she pulled one of my legs towards her. "I doubt you could satisfy her, even if you had both your hands at your disposal."
Aspen tugged on my other leg. "I don't even need my hands to have her trembling underneath me."
Another snort left Ashleigh's lips. With another tug, she pulled her leg closer to her again. "Trembling in disgust, perhaps."
"Guys..." I tried to interject, but my words got lost in between their bickering.
I felt another tug. This time it was Aspen again. "No, trembling from all the pleasure."
"Guys?"
Ashleigh pulled again on my one leg, her usually beautiful smile turned into an angry snarl. "Get your hands off of her!"
"You first!" Aspen countered as he yanked my other leg towards him.
"Let go of her!" Ashleigh yelled, her nails digging deep into my skin as she grabbed hold of the leg on her side.
"Never!" Aspen growled back, his hands engulfing my thigh as he yanked just as hard.
Without any warning, the twins suddenly tore my legs open, my skin splitting as needles of pain jabbed deep into my body. "AAAAAH!"
With a loud gasp, I shot up from my bed. Well... My spot of ground. I felt beads of sweat dripping from my forehead as my heart was almost pounding out of m
y chest. I buried my fists deep into my sockets as I tried to rub the sleep out of them.
It was just a dream, Akira... Just a dream...
I looked at the two bodies curled up on either side of me and felt my heartbeat slow down as both the siblings were soundly asleep.
