by Amy Noelle
“Yeah.” His fingers were under my chin and he tilted my head so I had to look up at him. “I can see where that would push BOB over the edge for you. But do you know what he doesn’t do?”
He was perched on the desk, and he pulled me to my feet to stand between his legs. His hands framed my face and his lips were right there. I wanted to kiss him so badly, it hurt.
“He doesn’t say he loves you at all. He doesn’t touch your skin or look into your eyes, and tell you you’re the only girl in the world for him. That he’s been scared to say it because he didn’t want to lose you. He doesn’t tell you he ached for you every minute he was away.”
Tears spilled down my cheeks, and he brushed them away. “He doesn’t dry your tears or hold you when you don’t feel good. He doesn’t offer to bring you chicken noodle soup and give you a back massage just to make you feel a little bit better. He doesn’t think about you when you’re not around, and he doesn’t smile because thoughts of you make him feel incredible.”
I couldn’t say anything, so I just let him continue.
“He doesn’t love you so much, he can barely think around it. He doesn’t want to make yours the last face he sees at night and the first he sees in the morning. He wouldn’t hurry to work just for a chance to spend extra time with you. He wouldn’t—”
I stopped him with a kiss. I didn’t need to hear any more. I couldn’t. It was all so much, and my heart was too full. I wanted to laugh and cry and scream and shout, but mostly I just wanted him. He tightened his arms around me and pulled me against him. His muscular thighs trapped me as our lips met frantically.
“Do you get it now?” he asked when we broke apart.
“Yes.” He’d given me his heart and, though it terrified me, I had to give him mine. He already had it. I’d just refused to admit it until now. I looked into his handsome face. How had this amazing man fallen for me with all my insecurities and craziness? I was one lucky bitch. “You terrify me. You have from the first moment, because I think I knew I was going to fall for you. And I did.”
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. I hated myself for making him fear, for even one second, that I didn’t love him.
“You guided me right to where you wanted me, didn’t you?” I said. He opened his eyes and smiled. I laughed. “You knew just how to get under my skin and maneuver me to let you in, bit by bit, until I was filled with you. My friends have tried to tell me for days now what I was too stubborn to admit, but I didn’t want to hear it. I guess, maybe, not until I heard it from you.”
He sat there patiently, as always.
“I’m a coward, Josh. You were right about that. I tried to find the out because I knew in the end it would be easier to lose you sooner than later. Taking a chance, especially on a man, was never something I wanted to do.”
“I know.”’
“Yeah, you do. You know me better than anyone else ever has, and yet somehow, here you are. And you love me. It’s pretty incredible, isn’t it?”
“I’d say so.” He ran his hands up my arms. “You drive me crazy, but I don’t want anything else.”
I laughed. “I’m going to drive you crazy for a long time. Because if you try to walk away from me now, I’ll have Ryan shoot you.”
He chuckled. “He just might do it. I drove him nuts while I waited for you to realize what we had.”
“Well, you’re probably safe, but I don’t think he’s going to be too fond of me after I dump his girlfriend’s body in Lake Michigan.”
He laughed and hugged me. “Don’t kill her. It was for a good cause.”
Yeah, it was. “She’s going to hold it over my head forever.”
“Maybe, but wasn’t it worth it in the end?”
I pulled back and looked into his eyes. “Yes. Seeing that look on your face and hearing that you love me . . . I’d give anything for that.”
“All you have to do is love me back.”
“I do. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
My chest felt like it might explode, and I grinned until my cheeks hurt.
“Code Red officially cancelled.”
He raised an eyebrow. “What does that mean?”
I giggled and tugged him off the desk. “I’ll explain it to you someday. For now, let’s go home.”
He smiled. “Home? I like the sound of that.”
So did I.
Epilogue
“Are you home?” I called from the bedroom. No response. Damn. I thought I’d heard him, and I was starving. I was really, really tired of unpacking boxes. Moving sucked, even if this new place was perfect.
My place was just too small for the two of us, well, four of us if I counted the cats, and I had to or they’d hurt me. After four months of cohabiting and with my lease coming up for renewal, we’d agreed to go in on a new place together. Once upon a time that would have scared me shitless, but no longer. Josh and I were as strong as we’d ever been.
We’d found a three-bedroom condo just minutes from the office, which I loved because I got to sleep in, and he loved because he actually had a closet of his own. We had two bathrooms and a gourmet kitchen that both of us were going to attempt to learn how to use. We even had a small balcony where Josh could grill, and he hadn’t lied, he did have skills there.
I sighed and sat down on the bed with a box labeled “nightstand.” All the junk I’d deemed worthy of moving was in there, and I had to laugh when my hand closed around BOB. I’d kept him, even though Josh still teased me mercilessly. Every now and then he’d spout off something he could do that BOB couldn’t, and do a ridiculous victory dance. I smacked him for some of them. Mentioning BOB in mixed company was not allowed, but every now and then he slipped.
I pulled BOB out of the box and noticed a piece of notebook paper wrapped around him. I peeled it off and laughed myself silly.
BOB is lazy and doesn’t help you move.
“What’s so funny?” I looked up, and there he was in the doorway. My man, looking hot in jeans and a T-shirt, his strong arms on display. He still had a bit of a tan from the quick trip we’d taken to California in August. We’d combined work and pleasure and stopped in at Starfire on our way down to Malibu.
I held up his note, and he grinned. “Well, he doesn’t.”
I smirked and leaned back against the pillows. “Actually, he helps me move quite a bit. Do you want a demonstration?”
Josh’s eyes widened, and he took a step into the room. “Uh, how about a hell yes?” My stomach took that moment to rumble, and he chuckled. “I guess that means I need to feed you first.”
“I always move better on a full stomach.”
“Don’t I know it?” He pulled me off the bed and led the way into the living room—the one room we’d mostly set up already. There were lit candles on the coffee table, along with cartons of Chinese food and what looked to be a bottle of champagne. The cats were chilling on their brand new beds we’d bought for them.
“What’s all this?” He was just supposed to grab us a pizza, since we didn’t have the plates or silverware unpacked.
“Dinner.” He led me over to the couch, and we both sat. Then he poured us each a glass of champagne.
“Paper cups. Classy.”
He laughed. “I’m all about the class, baby. I just thought we’d celebrate.”
“We have a lot more unpacking to do before we declare ourselves officially moved in,” I said. Thinking about that tired me out. I should have bribed the girls and their men to stay and help us unpack once they’d helped us carry everything in.
“I know, but we’re finally a step closer to where we’re meant to be.”
I smiled and kissed him. “Yes, we are.” I wasn’t scared of where we were headed anymore. It all just made sense now.
“So I got us the same meal we had the night you invited me in for the first time.”
“The twentieth time. It was just the night you finally gave in.” He chuckled. “But as I recall, we had
beer that night.”
“Yes, but tonight we’re celebrating,” he said. Good point. And I wasn’t one to turn down champagne.
We dug into our garlic chicken and Mongolian beef. When I was stuffed, I sat back and patted my stomach. “That was probably a bad idea. I don’t think I can unpack anything now.”
He grinned and handed me a fortune cookie. “I think we’ve earned the night off.”
“Awesome. We need to start christening this place anyway.” When I could move again, I was going to rock his world.
“You are my perfect woman. Eat your cookie.”
Damn right I was. I broke apart the cookie and pulled out my slip.
BOB won’t do this either.
I looked over at Josh and found him kneeling on the floor, a black box in his hand.
“Nicole Magette, you’ve captivated me from the moment I read your dirty, dirty words.” I laughed. Trust Josh, the man who could make me weak with his romantic words, to start this with commentary on my dirty ones. He grinned and took my hand. “You’ve challenged me, fought me, and finally loved me with everything you had, and I’d like to think I’ve done the same. We’ve come a long way, and maybe I should be satisfied with this for a while, but I can’t be. I want to know you’re mine, forever, because I’m going to love you for that long. Will you marry me?”
He flipped open the box, but I didn’t even bother looking at the ring. It didn’t matter. All that did was right in front of me.
I searched inside myself for a remnant of the old me, the girl who would have run screaming from the room six months ago. She wasn’t there.
“Yes, I’ll marry you.”
He dove at me and had me pinned to the couch as he kissed the life out of me. I laughed in between returning his kisses. “You might want to get that ring on my finger before you drop it,” I said when he started to roam farther south.
“Good plan.” He sat up and pulled me into a sitting position. This time I watched as he slid the ring on my finger. It was a beautiful cushion-cut diamond solitaire—simple, beautiful, and I loved it. “Perfect fit,” he said before bringing my hand to his lips and kissing my finger just below the ring.
“Yes, you are.” I pulled him forward and kissed him. I’d learned something over these past months. I’d invented the Code Red as a shield, a way to keep myself from getting hurt, but it had been useless when I met the right man. The shield couldn’t hold, the Code Red couldn’t stand, and no matter how hard I fought it, I was going to lose. Lucky for me, losing had never felt so good.
