He snorted. “It’s been nothing we can’t handle, even these Council assholes. We’ve taken out the safe houses, and we took out all those fuckers in the tunnels. No one got seriously hurt.” He shrugged. “Well, no one on our side.”
She pursed her lips. “It’s just something to think about. You’ve got a daughter now. It’s important to think about her future too.”
James’ face twitched.
Damn, that was a low blow. I shouldn’t hide behind Alison like that, but anything to at least get him thinking about this shit.
Shay held up a hand. “I get it. I was a killer for a long time. It was hard switching jobs.”
James shook his head. “I’m not gonna stop being a bounty hunter just because a few assholes have tried to kill me. I’m still more annoyed they damaged Phillips than that they tried to kill me. People being after me is nothing new. The Harriken and these Council assholes were a little tougher than what I had to deal with back in the day, but I’ve gotten tougher, too, and not just because of Whispy Doom.” He grunted. “Don’t really care. What would I even do if I quit? I like to think I could open a barbeque place, but I’m not a businessman. I’d probably punt some fucker through the wall the first time he talked shit about my sauce, so I’ll keep taking down assholes until I need a walker. You really that worried?”
“I don’t know.” Shay shrugged. “I just worry every time I leave that some fucker’s gonna come and kill you, and I won’t be there to have your back.” She sighed and grinned. “If you do die, I’m gonna be forced to go on a bloody whirlwind tour of vengeance, and that’s gonna keep me really busy.”
James grunted. “I’ll try to make sure I only die when you’re on vacation.”
“That would be helpful.”
He chuckled. “Doesn’t matter for now. The Council’s finished. He Who Hunts is dead, or he would have already shown up. I think it was just a few of their low-level punks trying to prove some shit or going off of final orders.” He grinned. “You should be happy. I’m gonna take a few weeks off and concentrate on barbeque. We need to get the PFW team ready for our next competition. It’ll be nice and relaxing, good bonding for the guys, just them on a few low-level bounties. They’re all taking Shorty’s death well, but they’ve also been very busy. I don’t want to run them into the ground.”
No problem with encouraging him to focus on his barbeque team for a while.
Shay smiled. “That sounds good. It’s not like Los Angeles will fall apart just because you don’t kick half a dozen asses a month. Relax and obsess over barbeque for a while. Save the beatdowns for judges who criticize your meat.”
He nodded. “Yeah, also gives me more time to find the dog.”
Shay winced and shook her head. “I don’t know if you’re ready for another dog.”
“How the hell can I not be ready for a dog? I had a dog for years.” James looked and sounded more confused than angry.
She sighed. “Maybe it’s more that I’m worried about the city.”
“Worried about the city?”
Shay nodded. “If someone hurts your new dog, you might destroy the city.” She shrugged. “If you want a new pet maybe you should get one, but that random stray dog isn’t your responsibility. Why not go to a breeder or a shelter or something? And the dog might not even be a stray. Maybe it already wandered home to some other barbeque-loving bounty hunter. If you pick one out yourself, you’ll be able to make sure that it’s perfectly suited for your personality.”
“This isn’t about me. It’s about the dog.” James shook his head. “If he’s not a stray, then his owner is a fucking moron. He shouldn’t let his dog wander the neighborhood where he might get hit by a car. That’s fucking irresponsible. Dogs get out, sure. Leeroy did on occasion too, but I’ve seen that dog a few times now, so I don’t think he’s got an owner.”
“What are you going to do? I know you have the Little Rascals running around trying to track the dog. Are you going to use your bounty hunter skills to track down a stray dog?” Shay snorted. “It’s not like you can go rough up raccoon informants for his whereabouts. He’s a dog.”
He sat there for a moment, his brow furrowed.
Oh, shit. I just gave him an idea, didn’t I?
James grinned and nodded. “You’re right, Shay. I need to stop thinking of this dog like a stray and start thinking of him like a bounty.”
Shay chuckled. “What does that mean? Do I need to tell all the raccoons to get out of Los Angeles County?”
James shook his head. “I got a good look at the dog, good enough that I have those kids running around searching for him. I’m sure Heather can do some of her shit with drones and find him. Algorithms or some shit like that. This isn’t about me getting the dog. I just want to make sure he’s okay. If he’s someone’s dog, I’ll have a conversation with them about proper pet ownership.”
“I’m sure that will be painful for them.” Shay smirked.
James shrugged. “If they’ve been a bad owner. If not, then I can take the dog to the shelter until I’m ready for a new dog.”
“Chihuahua?”
He stared at her.
She shrugged. “The contrast would be hysterical.” She sighed. “You’re no fun.”
James grunted.
Okay, so James is getting a new dog soon. Oh, I really, really hope this dog isn’t a furry little shit.
Shay cleared her throat. “Just curious. Setting aside breed, if you had a dog, what would you name him?”
She worried about him going with Leeroy II.
James frowned. “Don’t know. Hadn’t thought about it much.”
Shay nodded. “Okay. Do what you need to do, but I can’t call Peyton back from vacation for this.”
“It’s okay. Between the kids and Heather, I’m sure we can find the dog.” James nodded, his face filled with determination.
If he can take out the Harriken and the Council, he can find one stupid dog in his neighborhood.
13
“James hasn’t called Heather yet, but it’s only a matter of time,” Shay explained and picked up her fork. “This is a new level of obsession.”
Maria shrugged. “Sounds like a man who needs a new pet. I’m not much of a pet girl myself, but I can understand the bond between a man and his dog.”
She munched on her forkful of salad as Maria sipped a lemonade. As much as Shay liked some of her other friends, they all still believed she was only an archaeology professor. Since Maria knew the truth, it made hanging out with her far more relaxing—such as with today’s refreshing lunch date.
Light conversation and equally light jazz flowed around them at the busy bistro. It wasn’t the fanciest place she’d been to in a while, but it was perfect for a peaceful afternoon.
This is what a normal life should be. Okay, maybe not normal, but at least real. Actual friends. Actual people I can talk to without having to remember what lies I told them. People who respect me for what I do and aren’t planning on shooting me the first chance they get, or who would run away screaming if they knew the truth.
Shay sighed. “I just hope he’s not building up that particular dog too much. He might just be misunderstanding the situation with it wandering around. I don’t know. I’ve never really been big on the pet thing myself. All the men in my life seem to love them, though. And it gives James something to do now that the Council crap is finally over. I wasn’t so sure, but if He Who Hunts is still alive, I doubt he would have waited so long to make his next move.”
Maria nodded. “Yeah, Tyler hasn’t heard anything. I know he’s got Kathy chatting with an informant, but all he was willing to spill was the informant didn’t have anything else useful to say other than the previous tunnel tip. He’s acting cagey, but that doesn’t mean anything. I’m sleeping with the guy, and I still think he’s trying to figure out how to charge me for information about the location of his apartment.”
“Got to accept our men as they are.” Shay grinned, and the wom
en shared a laugh.
Maria folded her hands in front of her, her face tightening. “I’ve got something to tell you.”
Shay looked up. “Don’t tell me you’ve heard that Council bastard’s still around through the cops or something.” She groaned. “I thought this shit was finally over. I like it when my biggest worry about James is whether he’s going overboard looking for a dog.”
The other woman laughed and shook her head. “Nothing like that. Barely been paying attention to that kind of thing the last few weeks other than what I hear through Tyler.” She rubbed the back of her neck. “I’m not a cop anymore.”
Shay blinked several times and set her fork down. “What? I thought you were just on a leave of absence.”
“I was.” Maria shrugged. “And I’ve turned it into official retirement. I guess hanging out with you all has corrupted me. I can’t take all the red tape and political bullshit anymore. It’s not a horrible deal. I’ve already put in twenty years, so I even get a pension.”
“You know my story. Sometimes changing jobs is great for sanity.” Shay shrugged.
Maria smirked. “Your old job was…” she looked around, “a little more questionable than being a cop.”
Shay winked. “It’s all a matter of perspective. Any thoughts on what you’re going to do now?”
“I’m…bouncing ideas around.” Maria waved a hand. “But I don’t want to talk about that right now. I wanted to invite you to my going-away party. The rest of the AET guys are throwing it. Hell, Weber’s organizing it.” She shook her head, disbelief coloring her face.
“What’s wrong with that? Is he shitty at planning parties?” Shay furrowed her brow. She was far from an expert on decent parties herself, other than the ones she snuck into to kill people.
“No, nothing like that. It’s just I’m honestly surprised. I’m not an idiot. I know I can be a hardass and a bitch. I’ve always kind of secretly wondered if most of the guys hated me. It wasn’t like they were going to say shit to me when I was their boss, but now that I’m leaving they’re throwing me a party.” Maria sighed and smiled. “I’m not going to get all weepy or crap like that. Don’t worry.”
Shay reached over the table and patted her hand. “Glad to hear your guys like you.” She leaned in to whisper, “One of the reasons I left my old job was that one of my own friends tried to kill me for a contract, so I know a thing or two about that kind of shit.”
Maria blinked. “Seriously?”
Shay leaned back and nodded. “Whose body do you think they found in my old place?”
“Huh. That’s definitely a colorful way to change careers.” Maria sighed. “You think Brownstone would consider coming? I’d like him there for a few different reasons. He’s a big part of why I’m doing this, after all.”
“I’ll ask him, but he’ll probably be uncomfortable unless there is barbeque to distract him.”
Maria laughed. “I’ll make sure Weber has barbeque there.”
Maria’s head swam as she leaned against the back of her chair. She’d lost track of how many beers she’d drunk. A quick look around the room confirmed that everyone else in the Black Sun that evening was either swaying or red-faced, except for Tyler, Kathy, and Brownstone. Tyler had insisted that if there was going to be a drunken party at his place he needed to be sober.
“A room full of drunken cops,” he had whined. “If they get rowdy, who am I going to call? The fire department?”
Brownstone didn’t seem much affected even though he’d drunk plenty of beer. Maria wasn’t surprised.
Tyler had cleared out the scum for the evening, leaving only cops, bounty hunters, and their families. Besides Weber and the rest of the available off-duty AET, there were dozens of other police officers, including Sergeant Mack, and their spouses. A handful of Brownstone Agency men were there. The rest were out on jobs, but Trey and a half-dozen others had shown up.
Trey, Sergeant Mack, and Brownstone huddled together at a table, eating ribs and brisket and speaking quietly but with a lot of gestures at their barbeque. When Maria had wandered by their table, they had been in deep discussion over some barbeque minutiae related to their team.
A cop, a bounty hunter, and a former criminal turned bounty hunter. Whatever else I can say about Brownstone, the man brings people together through sheer force of will. That’s got to be the definition of a great leader.
Loud rock music blasted over the speakers. A few people were dancing, but most people were sitting or standing, talking and sharing stories. Even without the music, the din created by so many people talking made it hard to hear past one’s own table.
Tyler walked over to Maria’s table and sat down. Kathy had taken point on handling most of the drinks for the night but needed help now and again, especially when some table decided it was time for shots.
“This is it,” Tyler declared. “You can’t go back now.”
“Wasn’t planning to go back.” Maria grinned. “Weber told me that you only gave him a ten percent discount. Stingy.”
Tyler shrugged. “If you were talking like a half a dozen people, sure, I could take the hit, but you’ve got half a station in here, and freaking Brownstone keeps drinking like it’s impossible for him to even get drunk.” He frowned. “Shit, maybe it is.”
Maria laughed. “I’m just messing with you.”
Weber staggered over with a beer in hand and sat in an open seat. “I don’t know what I’m going to do, Maria. Without you yelling at me about coffee in the morning, I think I’ve lost my purpose in life,” he slurred. He glanced at Tyler. “Does she yell at you about coffee, man?”
Tyler shook his head. “Not about coffee. Everything else, though…”
Both men laughed.
Maria rolled her eyes and turned as she sensed someone behind her. Shay.
The other woman smirked at Tyler. “Yeah, Mr. Pay Per View should be careful he’s saying.” A hint of menace underlay her words.
Tyler muttered something under under his breath as Shay took a seat.
She smiled. “Nice party, even if it feels weird to be around so many cops in a small room.”
Tyler chuckled at Shay. “Now that’s a sentiment I can relate to.”
Weber shook his head wildly. “It’s not going to be the same.” He set his beer down. “Without Maria busting our balls, the AET is going to get soft.”
Maria snorted. “You’ll be fine. You all know what to do. You don’t need me.”
Weber sniffled a little.
She groaned. “Come on, don’t do this.”
The sergeant stood and shuffled off, his arm to his face.
Maria sighed and stood. She picked up her glass and a fork and banged it against the side until everyone stopped talking and looked her way. Kathy killed the music with a few quick commands into her phone.
“I’ve chatted with a lot of you individually already,” Maria announced, “but I figured I should say something. I asked Weber not to have anyone give any speeches because I wanted to give one, and you all know I don’t like people outshining me.”
Everyone laughed. Weber laughed harder than anyone else.
Maria smiled. “I’ve been a cop for twenty years. Beat cop the first few years, then Vice, then SWAT, and then AET. I’ve worked for the LAPD that entire time.” She took a deep breath. “The whole world changed on me and most of us all of a sudden right when I was starting out. Being a cop went from just dealing with criminals to worrying about magic.” She nodded at Weber and a few of the other AET officers present. “AET wasn’t even a thing at first. I mean, who would have even thought we needed to worry about a special division of cops to deal with magical threats?” She snorted. “Yeah, I know we call them enhanced threats, but we all know what we’re talking about. We are the anti-hocus-pocus squad. I am…I was the leader of the people who would have put the Wicked Witch of the West in her place if she showed up in LA looking for shoes and Dorothy. I might have never railgunned a flying monkey, but I came damn
ed close.”
The gathered crowd laughed, and the AET officers laughed loudest.
Maria blinked her eyes a few times, trying to keep any tears at bay. “Every day we worked together to keep people safe whether from the common criminals or the outrageous high-level bastards.” She looked down for a moment in silence. “And we all know that every day we get up in the morning and put on that uniform not knowing if we’ll make it home to those we care about.” She glanced at Tyler before returning her attention to the crowd. “But we all make that choice because we know that the police represent the thin blue line that keeps this city safe.”
The cops shouted their agreement.
She lost the war against her feelings, and a few tears leaked out. “Even though I’m retiring, every day from now on when I get up, I’ll think about you all first. Think about the sacrifices you’re continuing to make.” She wiped some tears from her face. “And how you are the best men and women I’ve ever known. I’ve never met finer people than my brothers and sisters in the LAPD. God bless you, everyone, and let’s keep having a good time the rest of tonight.”
The room exploded in applause, and Maria slumped into her chair. At least if she were crying there, it’d be not nearly so obvious.
Tyler was right. This is it. I’m not a cop anymore.
Weber wandered back over to the table as the applause died down. He waited for a good minute, as did Tyler and Shay, as Maria got her tears under control.
Losing all my ball-busting cred here. Everyone’s going to know I actually have a heart.
She blew out a breath. “This is harder than I’d thought it would be.”
“What are you going to do now, Maria?” Weber asked.
She let out a quiet chuckle. “Really wish people would stop asking me that. For tonight, I’m just going to do the whole eat, drink, and be merry thing.”
He shrugged. “You don’t seem really merry right now.”
Maria gave him a death glare and he winced, even as drunk as he was. Tyler eyed her for a moment with a slight smirk on his face.
The Unbelievable Mr Brownstone Omnibus Page 107
