by Regan Claire
The most unbelievable part was that I had found my home, and it wasn’t in the newly restored house that my mother left for me when she died. It was in the people who loved me, and that I loved in return. It was that I had a place in this world, and was valued, and held preciously.
A year ago, that was unimaginable. A year ago, that was an impossibility. A year ago, I was but a whisper of who I was becoming. Maybe that was the biggest difference. Not that I was loved, but how love had transformed me. I wasn’t broken anymore, wasn’t lost, wasn’t frozen to the world. I was on my way to becoming the person I was meant to be.
Chapter Nine
Journal,
Why doesn’t anyone believe me when I say I AM taking my life seriously? So, I like to play around a bit. And yeah, I’m a waitress. But that doesn’t mean I’m irresponsible. I just enjoy life. I like meeting people, and like the chaos of working in the restaurant. Is that really so bad? I don’t want to travel, my mom left me the Deare house and a ton of furniture to go in it, so I don’t need money for that. Dad just told me again that I’m not living up to my potential. He hardly looks at me anymore, and I don’t know why. We were so close when I was little, before mom died. He’s not like this with Connor. I don’t know what I did to make him hate me so much.
Maybe I should go back to school anyway. Anything to take that sad look out of his eyes when he looks at me. I like my life the way it is. I’m happy with who I am.
He just doesn’t understand me. Sometimes it feels like no one does. Hah, would you like some cheese with that whine, Gabs? Ugh, I even annoy myself sometimes. Who cares if he doesn’t understand. I understand, and that’s all that should matter.
*****
I felt the ring on my thumb heat up and looked down to see that it had changed to yellow. Ezra was asking if they could interrupt. It was then that I remembered Ezra, Ian, and Lena were waiting nearby. I saw their silhouettes inside the Jeep parked in my driveway.
I walked over and tapped the glass on the drivers side where Ezra was sitting. I crooked a finger at him, then proceeded up the stairs to my front door. Derek followed me up, but waited by the door while I went inside. He pulled Ezra to the side and asked if they could talk. Once Lena and Ian were all the way in the house, I stood in the doorway, unsure of whether Ezra should be alone for this conversation. He caught my eye and nodded, so I started to shut the door to give the two of them some privacy.
“Della,” my dad said before the door closed all the way.
“What’s up?” I asked, wondering if he wanted me to sit in on the conversation.
“You have a guest inside already. Don’t be alarmed.” Then he turned his attention back to Ezra.
It was kinda annoying that he just went and invited people into my home without my knowledge, but it took too much effort to hold onto my indignation, especially when the realization that Ezra was sitting outside talking privately to my father hit. The nerves I felt at the idea had nothing to do with the conversation they were likely having about Kaylus being Ezra’s father, or his Thanatos abilities, but with the fact that my dad was alone with the guy I’d been smooching on.
Then I smiled, because worrying about something so normal made me more happy than it made me nervous.
I went over to my couch and plopped down, throwing my feet onto the old milk cartons that were currently being used as a coffee table. I refused to be concerned with Ian and Lena, or whoever else was lurking in the other part of my house. I just wanted to relax and decompress for a few minutes before something else happened.
“Are you not going to say ‘hello?’” a man’s voice asked from the hallway leading to the bedrooms. I jumped up immediately, but not because I was scared.
“Alexander! What are you doing here?”
“Lord Derek thought it best if I stay here with you until the rest of the Council comes.”
“Why? I mean I’m glad, but why? Don’t you have more important things to do, like help Derek find out what the other Elfennol were saying about my brief disappearance and sudden reappearance?” I blabbered.
He took a few steps forward. “Because I requested it. You must be surrounded by people whose loyalty to you is not questionable. Laurel should also be here soon.”
“Oh.” I didn’t ask why it was so important, because it seemed there was an overabundance of answers to that. I was just thankful he was there, and that he wasn’t being punished somewhere for hiding things from Derek.
I sat back down, and put my feet back up. It occurred to me that I should probably change out of the scrubs I was still wearing, but they were absurdly comfy — like pajamas — so I kept them on and flipped the TV to Food Network.
“Why don’t you guys sit down,” I told the three Ethnos in the room when their silent standing began to unnerve me. They all did, Lena choosing our one armchair, and Ian and Alexander on the couch with me.
“Go on, put your feet up.” I told them all, moving my feet over so there’d be more room on the pillow topped crates. Ian was the only one who did so, while Alexander and Lena stayed upright — I was sure Alexander just wanted to be prepared in the mostly-unlikely possibility that we were attacked. Lena, though, seemed unsettled to be around Derek’s number two guy. She jumped up when the front door opened and Derek and Ezra both walked through.
I thought of the story that Ian had told Ezra and me and realized she was afraid of the Elfennol — and who could blame her? What had happened to her was one of the most appalling things I’d ever heard. But, if we were going to work together she would need to find a way to overcome that fear. I had a feeling a lot of people on both sides would need to find a way to overcome their fear — and their hatred.
Ian and Alexander both stood as well, and I reluctantly joined them. I studied Ezra and Derek’s faces — and both were void of emotion. Ezra’s aura, though, was flickering wildly and I knew he was upset. I hoped it wasn’t because my dad was acting like a jerk.
“Della, we should make a plan for when the rest of the Council comes here.” Something about the way my father said that made a touch of nerves swirl around my belly.
“Here? Alexander said ‘here,’ too. You mean they’ll be going to the base, correct?” I walked around the couch to stand in front of him.
“That was the plan when they were just coming to vote on going to war to get you back. Unfortunately, none of the Clades would be able to attend if we held it on Elfennol grounds. Until a decision is made, it would be a betrayal to bring them to the base.” Derek looked apologetic. “They will not know for sure why the plans have changed, but they will have heard rumors. It is best we hold this meeting on neutral ground. I will discuss with Dux Neale where the best location would be.”
By this time Ian, Alexander, and Lena had all gathered around. It would have been much easier to sit at the dining room table, but that was in another room and it never occurred to me to move.
“What will happen if they don’t agree to work with the Clades to find Kaylus?”
“Don’t worry, Della. They will see reason. And if they don’t, you can be assured that you will have all the support you need. The Leoht are bound to you, my daughter, as Duxa — to say nothing of the loyalty they feel towards you as their Epiklayra.”
I remembered then that my father, when he became the Leoht Council member, had bound his house with the Deare line. We had a direct alliance with each other that stood apart from their loyalty to the rest of the Elfennol. My father was saying that he would exile himself, and his entire house, for me if the rest of the council refused to be logical.
It was a big deal.
The rest of the people in the room were quiet. I don’t know if the Clades had heard about my father binding his house to the Deare line, but they seemed to be at a loss for words so I just assumed they knew.
“That’s comforting.” There was nothing else I could say. If I acted too shocked, or humbled, then he might think I didn’t trust him to stand by me. And since we’d just hash
ed that whole issue out before coming inside, I wasn’t in the mood to relive it. It had been a little too emotional, and emotional isn’t my thing. Well, it didn’t used to be my thing.
Ezra and I had scooted closer and closer to each other, something I hadn’t even realized we were doing until my shoulder bumped into his arm and our aura’s got all sticky with each other again. I felt the tension in my back ease I felt his do the same.
“What is this?” Derek looked between us again.
“What is what?” I straightened my back again. He said he knew we were close. I didn’t know why I was going to have to explain touching someone I was close to.
“We’ve noticed it every time they’ve been in contact. At the hospital they were able to strengthen each other’s abilities through it,” Lena said, voice strong and without a hint of the fear I’d sensed in her earlier.
Derek looked at Alexander. “Did you know about this?” He didn’t sound angry, just curious.
“Yes, my Lord. It did not occur to me to mention it considering the other things we needed to discuss first. It seemed unimportant.”
“Keep touching.” Derek’s brows furrowed, and Ezra and I looked at each other. Was that what had happened when we were working on Cash together? When we touched while using our abilities it felt like my entire world had been magnified. Where we were both struggling before — me with the Shield and Ezra with Gathering Death — we’d been able to finish our side of things pretty much instantly.
“It’s very interesting. I’ve never seen anything like it before. I wonder if it has happened before. You said their abilities expanded when they were touching?” Derek asked Lena, who just nodded her head.
He looked like a mad scientist, especially once he started to walk around us. “What happens when you stop touching? Show me.”
Ezra and I inched away from each other, but I could feel that our aura’s were still connected, as they always were before we got too far for them to reach. Derek had us inch further and further away until my aura snapped back from his.
“How unusual. How often have you two used your abilities while connected in this way?”
“Only at the hospital when we were assisting in the healing. It was accidental.” Ezra answered for us when I didn’t say anything.
“I’ve Shielded before while we’ve been touching. I’m almost always Shielding though.”
“Hmm,” was all Derek said in response. “I’d really like to talk to the two of you more about this. Until we get the chance to understand what is happening, I’d ask that you refrain from using your more physical abilities while touching. I wonder if we have anything written of this, or if it is a side effect of your human or Ethnos halves. Ezra, with permission, perhaps I will get started on the project we discussed earlier. Sometime after the Council comes, of course. The next several days will be busy with preparations.”
I looked quickly at Ezra, wondering what project he and my father could have discussed and how it pertained to our sticky auras. I held my tongue though, because I knew I’d be able to ask him soon.
“I must leave now, Della. You are going to the hospital first thing in the morning, I assume?” Derek asked.
I nodded my head.
“Would you like me to meet you there? I know this must be difficult.”
“No, that’s okay. I’m sure there are a lot of things you need to do before Etta and Richard get here. When is that, again? I can’t remember if you actually said a day.”
“They should be here in two days.”
“That’s really soon.” Nerves clogged my brain for a second. “Yeah, you just worry about how we’re going to spin this so they don’t bury their heads in the sand. Let me know if you need anything from me.”
“No, your place is by your cousin until he is well again. I wish the council meeting could be pushed back, but Kaylus is likely becoming more desperate by the minute, since he’s been rousted out from his hiding place. Which means he is also more dangerous. Immediate action is necessary.” He sounded regretful that there was something else going on in my life that would take me away from other things that were important to me. But I was fine with it. I wanted to be there for Cash, but I also wanted to make sure this world wasn’t destroyed by an army of Nothing, so he would actually be able to have a life.
“I wish I’d gotten the hang of talking through the gems! But I guess if Alexander is staying he can relay any messages between us?” There had been so much to learn during my time with the Elfennol, and I’d put that at the bottom of the list. Not that I regretted that decision. My time with them had many hours of combat training with my body and abilities. Those things were more likely to save my life in a fight, and that’s what I was most concerned about, considering how many times I found myself in one.
“I am staying, Della.”
We said goodbye to my father, and I made the other Ethnos in the room take a seat,while Iwent to go make some popcorn for a lack of anything better to do. It was still early, the sun had barely set, and I had nothing to really do until the following morning.
“Are you two staying, as well?” I asked Ian and Lena, handing them each a tupperware container full of popcorn.
“Yes, if you do not mind. With Kaylus out there, I think it best that we stay close to you,” Lena said, while Ian was slack jawed watching Alton Brown replace a chef’s fresh fruit with a jar full of candy. I wondered how often he’d been among humans, and if he’d ever seen a television before.
I really missed TV during my months with the Elfennol.
I scooched on the sofa between Ezra and Alexander, shoved a few kernels in my mouth, then fell asleep so suddenly, I wasn’t even sure I’d swallowed my bite or if it had fallen out and onto Ezra’s shirt.
I didn’t wake up again until I was already in my room being carried by Ezra for the millionth time in the past 48 hours.
“Hey, I can make the rest of the way myself.” I slid out of his arms and wiped the side of my mouth, where it was slick with drool. I’m a very elegant sleeper.
“Where is everyone else?” I asked when I remembered I hadn’t given sheets, or told anyone where they could sleep. We had four bedrooms, but one of them was filled with old furniture that Cash and I had decided not to use. Or rather, Aunt Ellis had decided we weren’t permitted to use until we’d “learned to appreciate nice things.” She was under the impression that we’d be hard on our stuff and since we both agreed with her, we kept a lot of the nicer or more delicate pieces covered in sheets and put in the fourth bedroom. The plan was to get a storage place or something, but I’d probably never get around to it.
“Alexander will be keeping watch tonight.” I opened my mouth to argue about the necessity of that, but Ezra held up both hands. “Hey, I tried to say if he thought it was that important, we should all take shifts. That’s how it is typically done. But he wouldn’t hear of it. I don’t think he trusts the rest of us.”
“He probably doesn’t trust the rest of you guys to keep me safe. Not that he doesn’t trust you, but he kinda takes the ‘bodyguard’ thing pretty seriously.”
“Can I make a joke about guarding your body?”
“I’m too tired to pretend you’re funny.” I told him, then stumbled over to my dresser and turned the lamp on. “Turn around.” I pulled out an old T-shirt and pair of jammy shorts, then finally changed out of the hospital scrubs. Ezra didn’t turn around until I’d climbed into bed. I had no idea how tired I was until I’d sat still for a while. My arms ached a little, and I shot some energy to my muscles there to ease the pain.
“Uh, goodnight Della,” Ezra said before moving to leave my room.
I didn’t give him a chance to, though. I Bent Air to push my bedroom door shut before he had a chance to walk out, then patted the bed next to me when he turned to look at me.
That was all the convincing he needed. He stripped off his shirt and climbed in bed, turning his body so we were facing each other in bed.
“You forgot
to turn the light off,” I whispered to him.
“You’re the one who turned it on,” he whispered back.
“Last one in bed has to do the lights.” I wasn’t whispering now, but talking in my normal voice.
“Is that our rule?” There was something in his voice, something hopeful, wanting us to have bedtime rules, wanting to have that ritual.
“Yes, that’s our rule.”
The lamp clicked off, his Loa doing the work for him.
We let the darkness fold around us like a blanket fresh from the dryer, and seconds of silence ticked by on the old clock I had on my bedside table.
“What did you and my dad talk about?” I finally asked.
“He wanted to know more about my father and what I knew about my own abilities. Not just the Thanatos power, but my human half.”
“I thought you didn’t know much about your mother.”
“I don’t. I don’t know anything. I told him that and he offered to look into it a bit for me, see if he can track down some of my mother’s family.”
I lifted onto my elbow since it seemed wrong to lay down completely during this type of conversation. “That’s a great idea, Ezra! Maybe Aunt Ellis can help. She knows a lot of different families over in Europe. How do you feel about it?”
He rolled over to his back, and stared at the ceiling in the darkness. “I don’t know. I’d never really considered it, never allowed myself the possibility of family outside of my father.”
I knew exactly what he was talking about. Sometimes it hurt more to hope or to daydream. If my social worker, Sarah, hadn’t found my family for me, I don’t think I ever would have taken that step to find out who they were.
Instead of telling him all that, things he surely already knew about me since we seemed to share most of our “baggage” issues, I leaned over to kiss him. Once on the forehead, one on each cheek, then one quick peck on the nose.
He flipped me onto my back, making me laugh while he kissed my nose about a dozen quick times. It was silly, and stupid, and perfect. Then he wasn’t kissing my nose anymore, but the nerve-heavy area directly below it. He took his time, drinking from my very essence, and when the needy noises I was making reached my ears, I placed a hand on his chest and gently pushed him away enough to talk.
