They continued to stick to their scrambled eggs and toasts. And, of course, custard, when Miranda would make it, which was basically whenever they wanted it.
One morning they tried cinnamon toast and loved it. They began eating small amounts of meat as long as it was fairly bland. And then, one Saturday afternoon, Kathy asked, "Could we go to church tomorrow, Miss?"
"If you'd like to, I don't see why not, at least for the next few weeks. I don't think we should go too far afield once you get closer to your time."
"So," Colleen asked, "can we all plan on going in the morning?"
"Yes," Lynn answered, even before Kathy could say anything.
"And," Kathy added, "we get to go to the restaurant afterwards. Remember, you said we could."
"Of course, I remember," Miranda said, "but perhaps we should wait until next week. After all, you all haven't been out and about for a very long time. You might feel tired after church and be more than ready to just come home and relax." She hoped they'd heard her say 'home'. She so wanted them to feel this was their home.
Kathy nodded, and turned to Lynn, saying, "That's true. We haven't been out around people for a very long time. And," she said cradling her belly, "I do get awful tired these days."
So, bright and early the next morning, Jake harnessed the wagon, while the girls dressed, as best they could. Eva found a few dresses in the missionary barrel for Lynn, but nothing that would fit Kathy. Several weeks ago, Meg had been forced to make Kathy two loose fitting dresses, since she'd begun to balloon out. In fact, she seemed to be noticeably larger every morning.
Finally, everyone was ready to climb into the wagon and leave for town. Although it was cold, it was a bright, clear morning, and everyone seemed to enjoy the ride into town and church.
They met Meg and Gus, and the doctor and Neil just outside the church, moments before were beginning, so they all slipped in as quietly as possible and took seats at the very back.
At the last minute, Kit seated herself beside Kathy, and whispered, "Remember what we spoke about last night... don't stare at anyone... don't look at anyone... don't show any recognition, even if you are sure they were one of Harding's clients.
"And, if you feel someone staring at you, pay no attention to them. Don't even see them. Pretend they're made of glass. Amnesia, even feigned amnesia, is the only way to get on with your life."
Kathy nodded. "Yes, I will. And I know you'll nudge me, should I forget."
Both Miranda and Victoria stared at the girls and frowned. The girls knew those looks and shushed. Then Kathy and Kit looked at them sheepishly and then went silent. But after a moment, they made eye contact with each other again, and Kathy nodded.
Lynn and Kathy both seemed to enjoy the experience. Especially, the singing. And afterwards, as they were leaving, almost everyone greeted them, said how good it was to see them out and about, or at least smiled their way.
But as they were speaking to the deacon in charge of this Sunday's service on the steps, Kathy visibly bristled before she hurried down to where the doctor and Neil were standing.
Miranda noticed and became worried that Kathy was feeling tired and overwhelmed. Without even asking the girls, she announced, "I think we better head home. I'm sure the girls are tired."
Lynn gave a little frown, but Kathy looked relieved, and allowed Kit to lead her away without speaking to anyone else. Meanwhile, Miranda, Colleen, and Victoria exchanged concerned looks. In a loud voice, the doctor asked, "Why don't Neil and I order food from the restaurant and bring it out to you all, since I know you didn't cook anything?"
"Thank you, but no. There's at least half a turkey, along with all the traditional Thanksgiving fixings," Miranda answered.
"I see," Victoria said, with a little smile.
"Well, we were talking last week, and the girls said how they'd always liked Thanksgiving, even at the orphanage. So, we decided we'd make up for the one they missed.
"In fact," Miranda continued, "there's plenty enough for you two and Meg and Gus. So, why don't you all join us?"
Neil grinned and answered, "I'd love a turkey dinner." Then he looked at Victoria and grinned, foolishly.
"Well, I guess we're having dinner with you all," she said. "Thank you."
"What about you and Gus, Meg? Interested in a dinner of leftover turkey and all the fixings?"
"Miranda, I'd think you already know my answer. As long as I don't have to cook anything, I'm thrilled," Meg replied. Then, smiling but wearing a puzzled expression, asked, "But with all the fixings? I would have thought that was too much food for the girls."
"Well, to a certain extent that's true. However, the turkey is easier for them to take than beef. And, with so much else to choose from, even if they only have a taste of this and that, they're eating more, whether they realize it or not.
"Which we're all happy about, because both the girls need as much good solid food as we can get them to eat."
"But I thought you weren't concerned about their food consumption?"
"Well, we aren't. However, even though they did eat tiny amounts of food continually, or nearly so, they didn't eat much. So, now we're hoping they'll do a little catching up."
"We'll be out. But first, I know we'll need to tell Ma where we're going."
"Oh, will she be upset?" Miranda asked. "I mean, she'll probably have your dinner already cooked."
"Well, I do have the dinner started," Ma said, coming up behind them all. Then, smiling, she continued, "But, I come to church too. And, we haven't seen you here since before Christmas." When Miranda grimaced, the older woman added, "However, you've had a lot going on."
Then she turned to Meg who was scowling, and said, "You two go enjoy yourselves. The roast will still be there tomorrow."
Meg asked, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm sure." And, before they left, she took Gus' sleeve and whispered, "And, on the ride out to Miranda's, try to get her to understand I work for both of you, and not just for you. Again!" But, she was smiling.
*****
"You know Ma was right, don't you?" Gus asked, as he guided the horse along the snowy road to the Hendriksen place.
"I suppose." Meg conceded.
"But?"
"It's just that Ma's had the running of your house, of the entire ranch, for a very long time. I'm just a usurper. And, even then, I don't do anything about the house, because I can't. The tragic fact is, even after taking care of the parsonage back in North Brookfield, I can't do all that she does. I can't even do half of what she does on a slow morning."
"That's why you don't have to worry about running the house and things. However, you are the mistress of the place. Everyone on our spread already understands that." Then grinning, he patted her knee and ended, "That is, except for you."
Chapter Twenty-Three
It turned out to be a good thing they went to church when they did. It began snowing late Monday afternoon and didn't stop for days. Even after the snow stopped falling, travel was practically impossible, unless you were fortunate enough to have a sleigh, and even then the roads were virtually impassable. And it turned out this was just the first of a series of snowstorms that struck Manchester almost continually for weeks on end.
The girls were especially disappointed by this. After being controlled by Brent Harding the better part of a year, and then weeks of suffering from headaches, nausea, and anxiety, once they were free from the hold of Mr. Lee's 'tea', they were ready to meet people. They'd found the people at church so open and friendly. They wanted to get to know them better. They wanted to make friends.
Still, there were things to do. Although Eva was stuck in town because of the weather, Miranda and Colleen did what they could to help the girls with their knitting and crocheting. That is, when they were feeling well enough to work.
Time crept on. The girls seemed to experience periods of feeling a much more normal. Then they'd feel ill for a bit. But, the doctor couldn't be sure if this was the last grip of
their morphine addiction or a combination of it and their pregnancies.
But, then there was a day when they both felt well for the entire day. And, they each drank a glass of milk for breakfast, lunch and dinner and kept it down. It looked as though their withdrawal was at last over.
*****
Several days after this monumental date, Kathy waited until Lynn had gone for a walk with Colleen before she approached Miranda and Kit, wearing a very solemn face.
"Kathy—" Miranda began. But the girl cut her off.
"Don't worry. I'm fine. But..."
"What?"
"I wanted to speak to you about something." However, when Kit made a move to leave the room, Kathy added, "No. Please stay. It's nothing awful. At least, I don't think it is."
"Just tell us what's on your mind, dear," Miranda told her in a soft, sympathetic voice.
"I'm worried about when the baby comes. I... I can remember my mother. She died having my little brother. And then he died, too."
Miranda sat down beside the girl put her arm around her, pulling the girl into a close, comforting hug. But, Kit spoke, "Sometimes mothers and their babies do die. But you'll be fine. You're young and strong. And, Dr. Thorne is a very good doctor."
"I'm not scared for myself. At least, not exactly. I know you'll take care of me, that you'll do the best you can, for both me and my baby. It's Lynn I'm worried about."
"Why? Has she been feeling ill and hiding it from us all?" Miranda asked, the concern raw in her voice.
"No! No, nothing like that. It's just... it's just, I... I don't want her to be here when the baby comes." Her pitch had begun to rise as she spoke. "As I said, I can remember when my mother died. I heard her cries—her screams—"
"But," Kit began, "most women scream. Dr. Thorne, Dr. Cooper, why even my papa said they do. And, that the screaming helps them deal with the labor pains. That it actually helps them focus when it's time for them to push."
"I'm not worried about me, or my screaming. It's just... just I... I don't want her to hear it. I'm sure everything will be fine. But, I'm just as sure I will make a lot of fuss, loudly. And, I don't want her to hear any of it."
Miranda let out a deep sigh. "I understand what you're saying and why. Believe me. And, it's something I've been meaning to discuss with... well... with everyone. Other than Lynn that is."
"Well," Kit said, "the doctor is coming out soon. What if we discuss it with her then? I'm sure Miss Colleen will take Lynn out again for a walk. Or, perhaps figure out a reason for her to keep her upstairs."
"But why do we need to discuss it further?" Kathy argued. "She's just a child herself. And, she'll know about the pain and screaming when her labor begins. She doesn't need to know about it before then."
"The thing is, even though Lynn is very young, she hasn't been living under glass her entire life. Between the orphanage and Harding's business, she probably knows much more about 'real life' than any of us think she does," Kit said flatly.
"So, you believe she should be here for the birth of Kathy's baby?" Miranda asked.
"Not necessarily," Kit exclaimed. "I agree that at least Miss Miranda and Dr. Thorne need to talk about it. Kind of weigh each side. Then maybe Miss Colleen and me can enter into it. And, of course, you should be included in all talk."
This seemed to appease both Miranda and Kathy. And, just in time, because Colleen and Lynn were heard stomping the snow off their boots, so they could come back inside.
*****
Even with the bad weather, Neil got Victoria out to check on the girls the day after this discussion. And, it was probably a good thing, because worrying about Lynn was having an obvious and detrimental effect on Kathy.
Miranda mentioned that they all needed to discuss a sensitive subject with the doctor without Lynn around. So Neil and Jake offered to show Lynn how to milk the cows, something she'd been begging to learn for a while.
So, once the men had ushered Lynn out to the barn, explaining that she would have to learn how to care for the cows, before she could learn how to milk them, Miranda, Victoria, and Kathy sat down at the table. Meanwhile, Kit and Colleen bustled about the kitchen, making tea and setting the table.
"Well," the doctor began, "Kathy appears to be doing very nicely. She told me she's been eating several times a day, Although, I did expect her to look a bit happier."
"Yes, the thing is, she's voiced a concern about when she goes into labor."
Turning to face Kathy, the doctor said, "I fully intended to have a very long and serious discussion about what you all should expect, but not for another several weeks."
"She's not concerned, at least at the moment, about her labor. She's worried about scaring Lynn."
"Scaring Lynn," Victoria repeated.
"Yes, ma'am. I was telling Miss Miranda about when my mama died. I was there while she had my baby brother. Things seemed to go on forever, and there was a lot of screaming and blood."
"Well, yes. There's generally lots of crying and blood. But that doesn't mean anything is wrong. It's just the way babies come into the world," Dr. Thorne said, calmly.
"But, I don't think Lynn needs to be anywhere she can hear me screaming."
"Has she said something to you?" Victoria asked.
"No. Well... not exactly. She's been watching how big I'm getting, and I think, and I want to repeat, think, she's concerned about how little she is. And, she's been asking me a lot of questions about whether I've seen a baby being born, or even held a newborn baby."
"It's just," Miranda said, "Kathy spoke to Kit and me a few days ago. And we decided to discuss it with you. However, I'd already been thinking about it. Losing sleep over it, really. And, I think maybe she's right. Perhaps, Lynn doesn't need to be here when Kathy's baby decides to come."
"Well, while I can see your concerns, I wonder if, by sending her away, we won't cause her more worry," the doctor answered. "I'm just throwing that out there, playing devil's advocate, if you will."
Kit had remained uncharacteristically quiet so far. But now, she cleared her throat and announced, "I agree, it probably is a good idea to remove Lynn from here, once Kathy's labor begins. But I think we... or at least someone, needs to talk to Lynn and tell her what you've decided and why. She needs to feel she's a trusted and valued member of this... this strange, wonderful extended family we've formed."
For a long moment Miranda was afraid she was going to burst into tears from sheer happiness. If Kit, who was always a bit removed from everyone else, could call their household a 'strange, wonderful extended family,' perhaps she had succeeded, after all. And they really were becoming a true family.
And, from the way Victoria was looking at her, she was sure the doctor understood exactly how joyous she was feeling.
In the end, they all decided that Kit was right. Lynn needed to be told why she'd be sent away when Kathy's labor began. And, that it was Kathy's desire to keep her calm that was the deciding factor.
After all, as the doctor later explained to Lynn, "Kathy is concerned about scaring you, and we need to do all we can to keep her calm. So, Jake will take you into town when the time comes.
"But you need to know this isn't in any way meant to punish you. And, you'll be brought right back home just as soon as the baby arrives."
Miranda smiled at Lynn and said, "Yes. Right back home because we're going to need all the help we can get."
Everyone smiled at this last comment, which caused Lynn to beam with pleasure.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Miranda didn't want to wander too far afield before Kathy's baby arrived. Not only did she not want to be gone in case Kathy went into labor early, but because Lynn was still not feeling completely well. Although, this was probably because she was definitely pregnant, and suffering from severe morning sickness.
After nearly a month of near blizzard-like conditions, however, Miranda couldn't stand being housebound any longer. She asked Jake to take her into town. Even if she only went into the
mercantile for a few minutes to look at a few bolts of new calicos and pick up another pound of peppermint candies, she had to get away.
But, apparently she wasn't the only woman in or around Manchester desperate to get away from her hearth and home for a while. The mercantile was packed to overflowing. Still, she was in no hurry. Instead, she found herself a deserted corner where there was a case of books for sale, although most of them were penny dreadfuls. Normally, she would never even consider allowing the girls to read such trash, let alone buy some for them. However, they too, were desperately in need of distraction. She was standing in the corner with her back to the rest of the crowded store, searching for the least salacious titles when she heard a voice she didn't recognize. Someone, speaking in a pitch that could shatter glass, was loudly voicing their doubts concerning Meg's marriage. She peered around the bookshelf, to see an extremely tall, thin, bony woman. In fact, Miranda didn't understand how the woman's shoulder blades and hip bones didn't actually slice through her clothing.
Miranda didn't know the woman, and she didn't care to create a scene in public. However, she also didn't particularly care to have a couple of her dearest friends publically maligned. 'Just ignore it,' she told herself. 'Just ignore it. And, she really did try to follow her own advice. But, this foul woman just kept talking, and when Miranda peeked around, again, she was concerned by the crowd the woman was attracting.
Rather than risking a scene, she decided to leave the store. She was nearly to the door, thinking perhaps, she would just go down to the workshop and visit Meg, when the strange, angular woman went too far.
"We've only been in town a few days, and already we see how badly public morals have been allowed to crumble. Luckily, we aren't afraid of hard work and telling things as they are. We can see we surely have our work cut out for us."
"I'm not sure why you believe things have become so bad. In truth," another woman said, "we've only been without a pastor for about six weeks, perhaps a bit longer. I don't see why you think the congregation is in such dire straits?"
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