by Megan Perry
I don’t know what to do about Zoe. I watch her for a moment as she sleeps on the floor. The way her hair frames her face and the light hits her porcelain skin makes her look so fragile. I know there is so much more to her than even I know, but I love her.
I don’t mean like my best friend, which she has been for practically my whole life, I love her like she is the other half of my soul. I can’t tell her, not now, maybe not ever. But if she is my other half I am hers, yet at some point she would have to feel it. Everything is going to start changing. When she finds out about everything, she may not even want me around anymore. When she finds out that I know, that I have known since the day I met her she won’t even want to look at me, let alone want to know that I would rather her kill me than be without her. I want to tell her everything, but she might think I need to be committed. From here her aura is brilliant even in its dimness. I guess it’s really not an aura, but it is the easiest thing for someone unlike me to comprehend. Individuals like me see these for every individual like us. Those unlike us are in muted grey and beige. Zoe is just like me, only she doesn’t know it. Her true identity has been hidden from her by forces I barely understand and cannot counter act. There are those who wish to harm her, to erase her from existence or at least find ways to use her for evil and there are those like me who only want the best for her and for her to know the truth of who she is, who she was born to be.
I walk back out to the living room and lay the futon down. I grab the extra couple of quilts from a closet and lay them across it to make it more comfortable. Stooping down I search through the entertainment system and pick out her favorite movie and start it. Walking back to the bathroom I hear her moan a little and she shifts on the floor. I wait for her to settle. I don’t want to wake her right now if I can avoid it. I don’t want to deal with anything at the moment. I need some time to think. I need to call Dean. He is my boss and mentor. He knows everything I can’t tell Zoe and even if he has no insight into the recent events, at least I can get it all off my chest.
Carefully I pick her up from the floor and make sure to keep the towel wrapped around her. I already laid an extra towel over her pillow to help dry her hair and so I gently lay her down.
She groans a little and her eyes move rapidly behind her eyelids. As I cover her with one of my blankets she begins to mumble. At first everything is incoherent. Then some of the words begin to make sense. “Where is he? Where have you taken him? What did you do to him? He’s no part of this. It is me you want. Just tell me what you want. I’ll give you anything. Please, please, don’t…..” Without thinking I whisper “who do they have?” “They took him, they took Gavin! I would die for him, not Gavin….” Holy crap she answered me! She is not awake, but whatever is going on is very real to her yet she hears me and responds to me. Does she know it’s me? “Zoe, what have they done to Gavin?” “I don’t know. He isn’t gold anymore. His eyes are empty. Tears are running down his cheeks. I can’t keep looking. It hurts me so much. I love him and I can’t help him. I can’t let him give his life for mine. I can’t…I can’t… I can’t… I… She rolls over and starts snoring quietly.
I have never heard her speak like this in her sleep. She definitely has never responded to me either. I don’t know if what she speaks of is a fear from her subconscious or if she knows something subconsciously that I need to worry about. She said she loved me! Holy hell! I really need to talk with Dean. This is getting crazy and frankly I am terrified. She shattered a mirror the length of the bathroom wall and now that I am looking around every piece of electronic equipment with a clock is flashing. Did she cause a power surge? I gently tuck her hair behind her ear and gasp. On her temple is a fresh burn mark? What the hell is going on? I let my fingers linger just a moment or two. Zoe looks so fragile, so delicate, yet when she sleeps and lets her guard down she always does. When she is awake she has to be some kind of warrior, it’s like she sees the world as her greatest enemy and can’t show any weakness. If she only knew just how strong she really is and that it’s the world that should be afraid of her. I try to heal what I can of her burn and leave her on the futon.
I walk to the back end of the kitchen and fish my phone out of my pocket. I quickly dial Dean’s number and it begins ringing on the other end. As the phone picks up I hear “Dean here.” “Hey, it’s Gavin.” “Hey, what’s up buddy?” “I need to chat” I said as I exhaled. “You alright kid?” Dean asks. “I’m not hurt or anything, but I need someone to bounce something off of.” I admit. “Well, shoot” Dean replied.
“It’s about Zoe. I don’t know if this is best over the phone. Can you drop by?”
I question. “You sure everything’s ok Gavin?” “Just come by we can have a couple beers and chat” I suggest. “Who’s beer?” Dean questions. “It’s on me man.” I laugh. “Just get your butt over here.” “Sure thing kid, give me 10.”
Dean says before I hear him hang up. I quietly slide the unopened pizza into the bottom shelf of the fridge. We can eat it whenever she wakes up. I toss some ice into a large Tupperware container and add some beers. As I make my way out of the kitchen I snag a bag of pretzels off the counter and bend down to unlatch the dog kennel. We make our way to the back door and out onto the fire escape. Relic makes herself comfy on an old mattress and I settle myself in an old camping chair. I set up the pretzels and beer on some old wooden crates and put my feet up on the rail while I wait. I leave the door cracked so I can hear if Zoe wakes up. My phone buzzes as Dean shoots me a text. “Be up in a second.” I respond “fire escape, Zoe is sleeping.” A few moments later I hear his boots on the metal stairs. As his tangled mop of brown hair appears in the opening to the stairs he asks, “jeez, could you live any higher up?” I laugh. “You’re just getting old.”
“So, kid what’s got your panties in such a bunch that you had to pull me off my couch before 4 in the afternoon on a Friday?” Dean asks while rubbing his scruffy chin. Using the inside of my elbow I twist off the tops of two beers and hand him one and start in on relaying the events of the past few days. Dean listens intently and as I get further into the events his brow furrows and at certain points concern and confusion flash across his weathered face. Dean is years my senior and even though he is just like me he still doesn’t know everything there is to know about who we are. He has some connections to those who know our history in detail and to those who have insight to our futures but even he can’t always provide insight to events that unfold. For instance, he has helped me to determine that Zoe has had her identity hidden by a form of magic that has some type of time release. Basically, the effects hiding her true nature from herself and the world will wear off. It seems as though she knows at some level, but most of it seems to be at the unconscious level. All of the vales are lifting but we are not sure how long it will take. It may be as if she is waking from a deep sleep or regaining her memory after amnesia, or it may be a total shock like she is being reborn.
Not many have been hidden and for each that has experienced the rejoining of our kind it has been different. We are sure her father was only slightly aware that her mother was like us and that he must protect her. We believe his knowledge was minimal due to the nature of the magic used to hide Zoe. He always told me to watch over her and when we were little he told me to never ask questions, just run. If we knew who her mother is more of this might make sense. He never did seem to know I was like her, but I knew what I was. Our lack of knowledge is one reason I am terrified that when she does begin to realize everything she will no longer want me around. I can only provide her with so many answers and I fear she will want more than I have to offer her.
“You know Gavin, I just don’t know.” Dean says shaking his head. “I know you are worried because you are calling her Zoe and every time you mention her pain spreads across your face, tears well up in your eyes and your aura flickers. You let your guard down and your eyes turn back to gold.” In frustration I close my eyes and shake my head returning my eyes to the hazel th
e world knows them as. “Has she ever noticed?” Dean asks. “To be honest, I don’t know. She has never mentioned it, but then again sometimes I can’t tell what she knows and what she hides.” It’s usually not too difficult because we have conflicting schedules, but now that she isn’t working it’s going to get difficult to keep my cover. I just wish I could tell her. You know this is killing me right?” I ask. “I can only imagine how difficult this is for you especially since she holds the other half of your soul. You are correct though, the vales seem to be lifting.
There also seems to be no specific trigger and her subconscious is either being played with, or she may be one who glimpses pieces of the future. Her mother must have been very powerful or she would not possess abilities to control energy and elements. She may not even come into her full self until she is completely bound with you and from what you tell me there is nothing romantic between the two of you so, this may take a while.” Dean explains.
“Her body is so weak and she only seems to sleep because she is not strong enough to be awake” I tell him.
“You know Gavin; you can only do so much for her. You cannot protect her mind and if someone has been able to influence her subconscious there is not much anyone can do until she knows who she is. Only then can she be taught how to defend her mind. If you can ask her questions and get answers just by speaking aloud then there is no telling what could be done from within. She may have thrown herself in that closet by either her own fear or someone else’s manipulation and be completely unaware of it. Gavin you might have to tell her even if she doesn’t understand who she is yet. You may have to see if information will trigger anything.”
“Dean, I don’t want to leave her alone. I’m afraid I will come home to her corpse one day.” My eyes are brimming with tears as I open two more beers and hand him one. “Well, Jaron is back in town so why don’t you take the week off and take care of her.
He can handle the bar for a while. Tell Zoe she can work for me as a waitress if she would like. Then you can keep an eye on her and if you aren’t there we can keep an eye on her.” “Thank you, but you really don’t have to” I say. “How would we keep the patrons and employees’ nature hidden from her?” “You take care of her man; you and she are meant to be something great.
What that is exactly I have no idea, but you got to try to make the link between you two as strong as you can before the magic finally wears off or you may not have a chance. You may lose her, hell we all may lose her. As her best friend, the man who loves her, and the only one who can truly save her you have to keep trying for you for her, for us all. I’ll take care of the bar. I know people.” Dean’s eyes shoot to the door and I hear Zoe stir. Dean chugs his beer, whispers “thanks” and is gone in the blink of an eye. He can be quick as hell when he wants to be. I down my last few swigs and begin to stand up.
“Gav, are you here,” she calls out in a groggy voice. I step in front of the opening to the apartment to answer her. “I’m out here ZZ. I’m glad you are finally awake. I am starving!” I say and Relic jumps up from her resting place and wiggles her huge body in between my legs and inside the apartment. Zoe gasps and then groans as the dog leaps onto the futon and begins to lick the side of her face. She looks down at herself as she sits up. I realize she has come out of her towel under the blankets and I drop my eyes to the floor. “Oh, my!”she exclaims. “Gav, you didn’t peek did you? You pervert!” I shake my head and try to hide the reddening of my cheeks. “Of course I didn’t ZZ, I have more respect for you than to do that. I might have been tempted if I hadn’t had to pick the lock on the bathroom door and found you in a heap on the floor.” I sighed and smirked.
She grinned and shook her head at me. “You still have those pills the doctor gave you for me? I have a splitting headache and I’m starving as well.”
“I’ll get your meds you should get dressed and I’ll pull the pizza out of the fridge.” “Sweet, cold pizza is my favorite! I’ll be back in a minute!” Zoe says ecstatically.
I grab the ice water and pretzels and head to the kitchen. I pour the ice water into the sink and toss the pretzels back on the counter. Moving to the fridge to get the pizza I smell her fragrance before I feel her arms snake around my waist and see her head pop out from under my arm. “Well, someone must be feeling better.” I say. Zoe looks up at me and without thinking I gasp and I know my eyes flash to gold and back in my surprise. Her brow furrows at me. “Your eyes switched color” I tell her. “Really?”she asks. “Yes, you need to tell me what happened and why I found you locked in the bathroom and in a heap on the floor.” She slides up in between me and the fridge. She stands on her tippy toes and gives me her famous puppy dog eyes. “I will, if you feed me!” She grins. I take a deep breath and close my eyes. I hate it when she is this close it’s so difficult to control myself. I can’t keep myself hidden and my will melts into a puddle. She still has her arms around my waist so before I can’t give myself away I pull her into my chest and tell her “you have to earn it ZZ. You’ve been difficult.”
“Whatever Gav, feed me now!” Her stomach growls loudly and we both laugh. I take a deep breath inhaling her irresistible fragrance and press my lips gently to her hair. “You have to stop scaring me so much, ZZ.” I mumble into her hair.
“Oh my God, feed me you oaf!” She demands. I pick her up and toss her over my shoulder. She squeals in delight and giggles. I grab the pizza in one hand and a bottle of coke for her. flip her down onto the futon and set out the pizza. She grabs her coke and greedily begins to drink it. I just shake my head and go back into the kitchen. I grab my remaining two beers and her meds from inside the cookie jar. We almost never have cookies so she would never look in the cookie jar.
I return to the couch and flop down beside her. She eyes my choice of beverage and asks “don’t you work in a little while?” “Nope I answer. I got a week’s worth of vacation and you drive me to drink woman!” I answer grinning from ear to ear. “I do not! Now what type of pizza did you get?” she asks lifting up the lid. “My favorite, EVERYTHING!
Woohoo! Thanks Gav! And my favorite movie!” she exclaims. Her movie is long over but it had returned to the main menu and the smile on her face just makes it harder to push everything from my mind. I might soon lose her and I barely have her now. I select play and hand her two pills. She looks at me and through a mouth full of pizza she asks “can I tell you about it after the movie?” I sigh and nod. Grabbing a slice and twisting of the cap on another beer I settle in to watch her watch the movie. Her face is always so much more entertaining than the movies she picks.
When we finish the pizza she wraps up in a blanket and snuggles in next to me like she always does. Halfway through the movie she falls asleep and by now she is half in my lap. I watch her chest rise and fall with each breath and then I feel it. Her body temperature starts to rise and her pale skin begins to flush. Her eyes begin to dark back and forth behind her eyelids. All of a sudden she sits straight up.
She turns around and faces me. My guard is down because she has been a sleep and I realize my cover is blown. I know my eyes glow gold and my mark is visible below the sleeves of my shirt and it glows gold as well in her presence.
To my surprise her eyes do not dilate or become as big as plates. She simply looks me straight in the eyes. Her aura which is a mix of sapphire and silver is brilliant and its vibrancy makes my own golden glow brighten like I have never experienced before. I am holding my breath waiting for her to speak or even react. She leans in close to my face and whispers. “Don’t give up. Be strong. My time is coming. Show me who I am. You have been chosen.” She leans in even closer and gently touches her lips to mine. It sends an electric shock through my entire body. As I open my eyes she lays back down closes her eyes and begins to gently snore.
I finally let out the breath I have been holding and I lay my head back against the futon. I keep running her words and her actions over and over again in my head. I’m not sure how to do what she has instructed
but I know I have to try. It also seems to be some kind of warning. Maybe her becoming aware is closer than I thought. Something is going to happen. Something is going to happen soon. I click off the TV and listen to the wind in the trees outside our building. It’s soft and soothing. I am not sure when I fell asleep; I just know Zoe wakes me up by screaming at the top of her lungs. When I open my eyes she is convulsing on my lap and she is holding her hands to her temples. Her eyes are wide open but all I can see is white. She blinks and her eyes become a solid sapphire blue. She has no iris and no pupil. She has stopped convulsing and there is a bright flash. I clamp my eyes shut because the light sends a searing pain through my head.
When the pain subsides and I open my eyes she is staring back at me with her solid sapphire eyes. A tear forms and slides down her right cheek. She reaches out and touches my face with her delicate fingers. At first she traces the contours of my jaw and the outline of my lips. She has a small frown on her face. Her jaw is clenched and a small flash shoots through her eyes. I jump in surprise and in a flash she is against the far wall. I can’t tell if she is awake or not. She has solid eyes so it is difficult to read her reactions.
I let out a slow breath, relax my shoulders and slowly hold out my hand. “I will not hurt you Zoe.
Please come and sit down and tell me what’s wrong.” She shakes her head and crouches down onto the floor.” Relic is hiding under Zoe’s bed crying and whimpering the scene has frightened her. Zoe seems to hear the dog and cocks her head to the side. She slowly rises and keeps her eyes locked on me. She slowly walks toward her room and I hear her crawl under the bed and quietly comfort the dog. She speaks a phrase in a language I do not understand and a moment later she returns with the hound in heel. She takes up her place by the far wall and slides back into a sitting position. Absent mindedly she pets the dog and stares at the floor. I begin to rise and her hand flies up signaling me to stop. “Do not move.” She commands. I sit back down and try to remind myself to breath. “Gavin, you know what is wrong with me don’t you.” She states more than asks. “Yes Zoe, I believe I do.” I choke out.
