by Dawn Gray
"So, what do we do now?" Julian said and looked out the window.
"I don't know, maybe we should try being friends, siblings for a while and if it's too odd, then I'll leave," I whispered in his ear.
"Are you going to tell Quinn?" Julian turned and looked at me.
"I can't say that I won't tell him, but not right now. I'm not going to suddenly get up and run out to him and announce anything," I reassured him. "But I can't promise that nothing will happen."
Julian kissed my cheek and stood up, then walked out of the room. I sighed and put my head back on the window glass, and when I looked outside again Quinn was looking up at me. I watched him for a few moments and then I moved away and started to get dress.
When I walked down and entered the sitting room, Julian was talking quietly to Lauren, who was holding his hand. Michael was caught up in a television program and a woman was dusting the counter.
Michael, I whispered to him. He turned and looked at me then stood and walked over. He stood near me and kissed my cheek. "Where's David?
"He's not a threat to you anymore," Michael whispered. I looked him in the eyes and shook my head.
"No one was ever a threat to me personally Michael," I replied and put my hands on my hips. "He was only a threat to himself for choosing the wrong side. If you feel the need to keep him locked up, feel free. However, don't keep him there because of me. My son is a prisoner and I don't want this to turn into a game of who-has-who."
"You want me to release him?" Michael asked.
"What?" Quinn questioned as he walked into the house. I looked at him.
"Nothing," I told him. "It's none of your concern." Then, I looked at Michael. "Yes," I told him and turned to walk away. Quinn took my arm and pulled me out of the room. We stood just on the other side of one of the pillars in the room. "This is not a good time, not right now."
"Now is a perfect time," Quinn said and put a hand by my head and leaned on his arm. "Are you nuts? Did those goons knock something loose in there?"
"I don't want David locked up. I want him to be free to roam and lead me right back to Victor and my son," I replied trying to slip away from him.
"So, you do have a plan in that thick scull of yours. Here I thought you were just going with the flow." Quinn smiled. Julian walked by and the two of them looked at each other.
"Don't start," I told him quietly.
"What?" Quinn asked as Julian passed by. "I wasn't going to start anything, not with him anyway."
"Quinn, please don't. Now is not the time and here is not the place," I told him and grabbed his arm, moving it out of my way. A jolt of something flashed through my body and I looked at Quinn, who had obviously felt it to.
"Hey, you two. Is you're secret discussion over with?" Lauren asked. I looked at her and nodded. "Good, because tonight they're having a bonfire and we're invited, so you better behave."
Quinn smiled his trademark mischievous smile then raised his eyebrows at me. I walked away and tried to keep myself busy until then. My world had been flipped upside down and I was totally lost.
Julian was out of my reach. Quinn seemed to make me anxious whenever he was near. Michael had a connection to me now that almost scared me.
Lauren found me on the rocks just passed the beach house. I was barefoot, but I had shorts and a sweatshirt on. She walked up and sat beside me as I stared out at the water.
"Hey," she said and smiled.
"Hi," I whispered. "I didn't think you were speaking to me."
"No, I'm still speaking to you, but you seem to not be speaking to me." She pointed out and put an arm around my shoulder. "So, do you want to talk about it?"
"About what?"
"You and Julian, you and Quinn, and you and Michael. What's up with you and the boys?" She questioned.
"Wow." I smiled and then it faded. "Where to start?"
"How about what all the yelling was about between Quinn and Julian."
"I'm not sure about that, but it lead to Michael coming in and exchanging blood with me."
"Okay, that's a little weird," Lauren stated.
"Julian came to check on me and asked me if I loved Quinn. Then he asked if I was in love with him and I couldn't tell him either. So, we decided to try and be friends." I smiled and then looked back out at the ocean. "As for Quinn and I, I'm too scared to think of it. I mean, do I love him, am I in love with him? I don't know. He just drives me up the wall, constantly trying to be the hero, never listening to a word I say, and I'm not sure if it makes me want to kiss him or strangle him. I'm afraid to be attracted to him, but I am. I'm afraid to want him, but I do, and I'm afraid to touch him."
"Touch him?" She asked me.
"Quinn seems to give off this powerful, strange, and erotic sensation when I touch him. At first, it frightened me. Now, I'm just afraid of how I can't resist it when I touch him." I smiled and looked at her. "I'm afraid to give into him, because I'm scared that I might like it."
"That's a new one." Lauren laughed. "Have you asked anyone about this feeling that you get from him?"
"No, it's too embarrassing, but I know he feels it too." I giggled. "Besides, who would I ask?"
"Michael," she replied. "I could ask Julian for you."
"I don't know," I said shyly.
"Are you going to go swimming with me later?" Lauren asked me, changing the subject. "They're having the bonfire over there, at the beach. Julian said that they have it every year about this time. The city asks to use the property and they give their permission."
"Yeah, sure." I smiled at her.
After dinner, before the bonfire, I took the back staircase to the second floor. When I walked by the reading room and I heard voices. Being the nosy person that I am, I stopped and peeked around the corner at Julian and Lauren, and then I stood back against the wall and listened.
"I'm not sure I want to talk about it," Julian said softly.
"Maybe it will help," Lauren said and I heard Julian sigh.
"I miss her. She's here, but she's so far away and she said that she loved me, but wasn't in love with me," Julian said in a whisper. "I couldn't tell her that I felt the same. Over eight years something transformed and my love became strong, but it was a possessive, protective love. She was my life that year and for the rest of her life, I was going to protect her no matter what. When she came back, I thought that I could rekindle it. I tried, but it got harder and it wasn't that I was mad because of what went on between her and my brother. It was more of the fact that I wasn't there to protect her from the pain."
"Can I ask you a question, but if it's too personal, you don't have to answer it?" She asked him. Julian must have nodded because suddenly she went on. "Ash told me that she gets this strong sensation from Quinn when they touch, have you ever heard of anything like that?"
"I've heard of it but I've never actually known someone who it happened too," Julian replied.
"So, what is it?" She questioned.
"In every species there is a connection between man and woman, male and female, with us, it is no different. It's what some people would call soul mates; I believe that's the term. One man and one woman connected by their inner souls, through countless generations of dying and being reborn. With the two of them, it could be possible. They would be the same age if her mother had her when she was supposed to." Julian sighed and then cleared his throat. "I thought something like that might have happened. Quinn usually doesn't just suddenly get that mad because of someone. He tries to be cool all the time and hold his composure. However, when I saw him explode at Michael when she was missing, I knew something was up."
That would explain the strange face that he had given me when I was looking through Lauren's eyes, trying to calm Quinn down. This is not what I expected. Soul mates, what is this some kind of soap opera? What’s next? UFO's? This was all too weird. All I wanted to do was get my son back and now I felt like I was on prime time television.
I stood in the shower, letting the hot wate
r calm my nerves. In that moment I felt completely alone, and I wanted to stay that way for a while. Low and behold, it wasn't meant to be. There was a knock at the door and I turned off the shower.
"What do I have to do to get a little privacy and quiet time around here?" I yelled loudly as I wrapped myself with a towel and walked to the door. When I swung it open, Lauren stood outside with a big smile on her face. "Come in, you're letting all of the hot air out."
She walked in and sat on the toilet seat cover as I stepped back in the tub and started to fill it up so I could sit in it.
"He told me," Lauren said and giggled.
"I know. I was listening," I replied and sat down it the tub. I pushed the curtain across so that my head was the only thing showing and I looked at her. "Why me? Why Quinn? Why now? Now is not a good time."
"Hey, the universe works in mysterious ways." Lauren smiled. "So, are you going to tell him?"
"No!" I replied and looked at her as if she was nuts. "That's all I need is for him to pester me when I'm in the middle of getting Jack back. Or worse, to insist on going with me to ‘protect’ me."
"You're just scared of the connection," she laughed.
"You're damn right," I replied and looked at the ceiling. "You've never felt it. It's overpowering, like nothing I've ever experienced before and I don't know how far it will take me. I'm not sure I even want to find out."
"Well, get you're lazy butt out of the tub, get your suit on and let's go, woman. I want to party." She laughed and danced out of the bathroom, leaving the door wide open.
"Do you live in a freaking barn?" I yelled as I grabbed the towel, wrapped it around me and got out to close the door. Quinn was walking by, just as I made it out of the tub. He stopped and looked at me, as I stared at him. The knowledge of what Julian had said was still fresh in my mind. I slowly closed the door and leaned against it. This was going to be one hell of a night.
10
The bonfire light was irresistible. I couldn't take my eyes off of it, as I stood there with a two-piece bathing suit on and a light wrap around my waist. I don't know how long I stood there, but it wasn't until Lauren grabbed my arm that I even flinched. She smiled at me, and then turned my head to where Quinn, Michael and Julian stood.
They were all wearing shorts, and they all had their shirts off. As I looked at them I stopped and stared at Quinn, who glanced over his glass of whatever it was that he was drinking and caught me staring. He looked me over once and then looked back at Michael. I looked at Lauren and I shook my head.
"I can't do this," I replied and took her hands in mine. "I can't be here, with them. I can't control myself."
Quickly, I walked away and went across the lawn to the ramp that led down to the ocean. I stopped and stood in the sand as I looked up at the moon, hugging myself tightly.
"Ash?" I heard his voice whisper. I closed my eyes and turned; when I opened them, I looked at Quinn. He had his hands in the pockets of his shorts and he stood less than two feet from me. I glanced up at him, then looked down and away. I saw, out of the corner of my eye, his hand reach out to touch me. I quickly stepped back out of his reach and looked at him.
"Please, don't," I begged him. His hands dropped to his side and he looked defeated. This made my eyes fill up with tears and I looked into his eyes as they started to move down my face. "I'm sorry, Quinn, I really am. It's not you. I don't know if I can handle this, I'm not sure I'm ready yet."
"Ready for what, Ash?" He asked softly. I realized then that I knew what I was afraid of. It wasn't his touch, or the feeling I got from him. It was something more powerful, more emotional than that. I had thought that I had experienced it before, but it was nothing compared to this. "Please, tell me what it is?"
"I'm afraid to love you, Quinn," I said and wiped my face. "It seems that everything I love, I lose and I can't do that again, not now." He knelt down on the sand and looked up at me.
"You're not going to lose me," he spoke softly. I walked in a circle and then knelt in the sand in front of him.
"You don't understand, Quinn. This is not some petty kind of childish love, not something that's going to fade or lessen and to know all that, what if something happens to us?" I wiped the tears from my eyes. "I want to love you. Inside I know that I already do, but, I just can't seem to bridge the gap."
"Can I help you try? Can I hold you?" He asked softly. I shook my head.
"Not yet. I'm still afraid of the feeling," I replied and stood up. "I'll be around the grounds, please don't worry."
Lauren found me, as she always did, and brought me out into the water. She did everything to distract me from my problems. Luckily, it seemed that everything was working.
Once, while we were in the water, someone was tossing people. They would step on his hand and he would toss them up in the air, then they dove into the water. I was floating on my back when Lauren yelled to me, grabbed my hand and pulled me over. This made me smile, until we came face to face with the person doing the tossing. It was Quinn and his smile faded when he saw me. Lauren's also faded and this made me a bit sad. I got up the nerve to try it. ‘What could a little tossing hurt?’ I thought and walked up to Quinn.
"So, how does this work?" I asked him. He smiled at me and let me see his folded hand.
"You step on my hands, put your hands on my shoulders and just relax," he said and laughed at me.
"Sounds kind of kinky if you ask me," Lauren added. Quinn looked at her and snickered then looked at me.
"Ready?" He asked. I reached out with both hands to touch his bare wet chest, but I couldn't seem to get any closer than an inch away. He reached his hands up and put them on mine then pressed my hands to his chest. It surged through us both like an electrical storm that made my nose tingle. I snatched my hand away and looked at him. He looked almost as shocked as I did and I backed away. "Don't go," he said softly to me. I bit my lip and tried to control my breathing. "Please."
"I..." I started then stepped back to him. I hesitated again, and then slowly put my hand on his chest again. The feeling swept over me, as I looked him in the eyes and the two of us just stood there. He put his hands on my waist and the surges got more powerful, until I thought that I was going to faint.
"Ash," he said, as he suddenly pulled me close to him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he closed his eyes. "I don't want this to stop."
"We don't even know what it is," I whispered to him.
"Now would be a good time to let go," Michael said in my ear. I opened my eyes, and he suddenly stood in front of me. "Whatever you're doing, stop it now, or we're going to get caught." I pushed away from Quinn and looked at Michael. Quinn turned also and looked at him. "Come with me, we have to talk."
Michael took my hand and looked at Quinn, who hurriedly looked at Lauren and followed us out of the water and up to the house. Lauren and I quickly changed and met each other on the stairs before walking out to the porch where the five of us sat; Michael, Lauren, and Julian in the deck chairs, I was on the wall and Quinn was leaning against the wall, about a foot away from me.
"What happened out there?" Julian asked. I shook my head and looked at Quinn, who glanced at me and looked back at his brother.
"Nothing," he replied.
"Quinn, this isn't something to play with." Michael sighed. "As soon as you two connected, you're eyes began to glow fire. Imagine if someone had actually seen that."
"I didn't notice anything," Quinn said again. His normal hardness had returned and he wanted nothing to do with anyone's opinion.
"Listen, the both of you," Julian spoke up. "Whatever connection the two of you have, you better keep it under control, because it could be a dangerous thing."
"I personally haven't seen anything about it that could be harmful to either of us," Quinn replied, again. I looked at the two of them and I stood up. Without a word, I walked off the deck and over to the trees. I heard Quinn tell someone to sit down, and then I heard the footsteps behind me. I turned and loo
ked at him as he approached. "Why are you always walking away?"
"I knew I shouldn't have done that," I told him and ran my hands through my hair, resting them on top of my head. "I told you I was scared. Why am I such an ass, why can't I just ..."
He grabbed me around the waist and pulled me to him, all in an instant. He kissed me, wholeheartedly, on the lips. I couldn't protest; I didn't want to. I was so fed up with restraint that I just wanted to give into him all the way. I lowered my arms and wrapped them around him. I put one hand on the back of his head and ran my fingers through his hair, then held him so he couldn't break away. It was getting too powerful, and the two of us could have easily given in, but his self-control made him able to pull away. He held me by my waist as I looked at him and put my hand on his cheek. With each passing second, the pulse grew less electrifying, but it never really went away.
"What's happening?" I asked him, staring into his eyes.
"You're letting it go," he whispered faintly. "We've been avoiding each other so much that I think it built up in us. When we first touched, it was like an explosion, and slowly it’s getting weaker. Don't you feel it? It's as it felt when we went to Boston. There, but controllable."
"I...I..." I couldn't find the word.
"You're not going to run again, are you?" He asked me. I smiled at him, and then it faded as I put my other hand on his chest and leaned my cheek against him. I felt so odd, but at the same time, so right.
"I'm terrified," I replied.
"No, you're just excited." He smiled at me. He kissed my head took my hand and kissed it, and then he let me go. We walked back to the others, not touching, and as we stood near them again, Julian looked at each of us. "Don't worry about it, it won't happen again. I think we figured out how to control it. So, you can just drop it."
Ash? Michael asked me. I looked at him. What is it?
He could read my emotions. The burning in my veins is getting to be too much. I think I need to lie down.
No, he said softly. You need to feed.
