by Roger Ma
WEAPON CUSTOMIZATION
Everyday tools can play a major role in your conflict against an attacking zombie. As we have seen, improvised weapons often are inexpensive, plentiful, and function just as well as some dedicated combat armaments. There is no doubt that a collection of found objects can form the cornerstone of your arsenal against the living dead. The greatest weakness of an improvised tool is its inherent nature as a piece of equipment not originally designed for combat. As such, the implement may require some modification in order for it to perform optimally in its new task: disposing of a walking corpse. Here are several ways you can customize your weapon to improve its tactical functionality:• Craft hand grips: If your weapon is not comfortable in the hand, it will rapidly become tiresome to wield during extended combat engagements. This issue may not be immediately apparent, but after disposing of ten, fifteen, or twenty consecutive undead attackers in as many minutes, you will quickly comprehend how an uncomfortable grip can affect your performance. Slight hand discomfort can transform into painful, technique-hindering blisters. A few lengths of duct tape-wrapped fabric around areas where you typically grasp your weapon can make a world of difference. Grips also create a tactile surface, making it easier to retain your weapon should it become coated with fluid, infectious or otherwise.
• File down edges: If the improvised tool you have chosen already has natural edges and contours, refine them further by grinding them down to a sharper bevel. By doing so, you make items such as shovels, scrapers, and screwdrivers even more lethal against the undead. Military personnel commonly use this technique on their entrenching tools, where a sharpened blade transforms the implement from a run-of-the-mill ditch-digging shovel into a de facto battle-axe.
• Create retention straps: A dangerous misfortune that can occur during undead combat is the loss of your weapon. This may happen if a ghoul manages to grab hold of your weapon and wrench it away from you during its attack. (This situation is rare and unintentional, as a zombie grabs at a weapon not to disarm, but to close the distance with its target.) Only after extensive combat engagements will you realize how exhausting it can be to simply keep a firm hold of your weapon. Your forearms will ache, your fingers will throb, and the muscles in your hands may begin to cramp, making it difficult to retain your weapon with each thrust or swing. This is the reason why many traditional arms are crafted with a retaining strap that can be looped around your wrist, enabling better security of the weapon. Replicate these straps by fastening a length of rope, leather, or fabric to your improvised tool so that even when you begin to tire, your weapon will still be close should it inadvertently slip from your grasp.
WEAPON MAINTENANCE
Be it a scimitar, battle-axe, or garden trowel, every weapon is a tool—a tool that can fail you if it is not properly maintained. Honing your weapons is as important as refining your fitness and combat skills. Do not be lulled by the misconception that simply because hand weapons do not have complex moving parts, unlike firearms or other ballistic weapons, they require no systematic upkeep. Just as you would clean your pistol after extensive firing and exercise your physique to keep it in optimum shape, establishing a customary maintenance routine for your armaments will maximize their fighting capabilities. After every zombie encounter, you should perform the following procedures once you have reached an area free of undead hostiles:• Clean: Using a soft, clean rag or paper towel, wipe down the entire weapon completely. Repeat this step several times, rinsing the cloth in between wipes. After the initial mopping in which you remove most of the extraneous fluids, spend the time to ensure that no blood, bone fragments, or cranial tissue have worked their way into the recesses of your weapon. If you have the time and resources, pass the entire weapon under warm running water. After a methodical scrubbing, dry your weapon thoroughly with a clean cloth. Do not ignore this last step, as water can corrode metal, weakening it and making it more susceptible to failure.
• Inspect: From tip to tail, closely examine every inch of your weapon. Note every dent, nick, or bend, and determine whether the reliability of the weapon has been irreparably compromised. Even the tiniest stress fracture can weaken the structural integrity of a weapon such that it may shatter upon impact during your next battle. This is another reason why using wood-based weapons such as staves or baseball bats is not recommended, because they are much more likely to falter in intense zombie combat situations.Some cracks can be so minuscule that they can barely be seen by the naked eye, even with close inspection. A good way to determine whether your weapon has an unseen fissure is to rap it lightly against another hard object. Listen for your weapon to reverberate with a solid ring. If the tool makes an odd or buzzing sound, there is a chance that a fracture exists, which may result in weapon failure during your next engagement. If you hear the latter, strike it harder against a solid object, attempting to shatter it yourself. Better to destroy your weapon during a moment of security than to make this unfortunate discovery in the midst of an attack.
• Preserve: Keep your weapons in a constant state of combat readiness. If you are using a long-range weapon, make sure the head affixes to the handle solidly and without wobble. If you are using a bludgeon, make sure the handle wraps are in good condition and replace them if necessary. If you are using an edged weapon, sharpen it. Do not become lackadaisical and convince yourself that you will tend to it after the next battle. The unexpected nature of a zombie attack means that you will often be thrown in to battle when you least expect it. The less time you spend caring for your weapons, the more time you will need to finish off your undead adversaries with a slippery, filthy, or dull weapon.
EXTERNALLY-FUELED WEAPONS
Note that regardless of the combat range covered and types of armaments discussed, we have not included evaluations of weapons that are powered by external energy sources. This was a conscious decision. Although electric, gas, or battery-powered tools such as circular saws and electric hammers may indeed be obtainable and devastating against the walking dead, they are not recommended as your primary combat weapons. Two of these reasons are obvious: The heft of these devices and the racket they generate when powered on make them cumbersome in transport and obtrusive in combat. There are two more reasons that are not as apparent, but just as significant:• Splatter: As mentioned in our evaluation of the sledgehammer, certain high-trauma weapons suffer from what is known as the splatter effect. Many powered weapons most certainly exhibit this trait, as they often create wide, indiscriminate spray patterns during combat, a result of their cycling, shark-toothed blades. These whirling edges can send contagious bits of flesh scattering several feet in all directions, making you and those around you more vulnerable to infection. Weapons of this nature are also notoriously difficult to clean. Once a power tool has been used in zombie combat, it is nearly impossible to thoroughly scour all the blood and tissue that accumulates within its gears. For every two minutes spent in combat, expect to spend an additional thirty minutes post-engagement cleaning the weapon.
• Energy: A key to surviving in an undead world is to minimize your overall footprint. Instead of traveling by car, journey by bicycle. Instead of an electrical light, burn candles. The same philosophy holds true for your choice in weaponry. Just as ammunition may be hoarded and in short supply during large-scale outbreaks, fuel of any sort will also become a scarce resource. What will you do when the power drill you are waving menacingly in battle grinds to an unexpected halt? It is much better to not have to plan for that contingency, and instead train with weapons powered by the most efficient energy source available: the human body.
This is not to say that powered weapons cannot play some role in your undead combat arsenal. If you have access to tools in this category, be strategic in their activation. Just as with firearms, they should play a secondary role in your combat engagements, and only in specific circumstances. The best instance in which to use these unique tools is when you find yourself drastically outnumbered by the undead. When your
energy level fades but several dozen ghoulish threats remain, start up the pneumatic drill. A fueled device can decimate a mob of ghouls in rapid succession, allowing you to finish the engagement with little physical exertion. Be judicious in their use and frugal with the energy they require, and these weapons can serve you best at times when you need them most.
WEAPON SELECTION—A FINAL WORD
Later in this manual we will describe combat techniques that complement many of the weapons detailed in this section. It is important to study these techniques and determine whether the armaments you have chosen as your first line of defense against the walking dead are truly appropriate for you. This may seem like an obvious statement, but it is not.
Individuals often find themselves enamored of a particular type, class, or size of weapon, even if it is poorly suited for their unique physical build, strength, or style of combat. Just as you need to honestly assess your physique to determine what type of zombie combatant you are, you should apply the same level of scrutiny to your choice of weapon. Simply because you’ve purchased a beautifully crafted, combat-ready battle-axe does not mean that particular weapon is your ideal match.
Remember, successful combatants throughout history have known that you need to fit the weapon to the fighter, not the fighter to the weapon.
DEFENSIVE EQUIPMENT
As we have seen in our overview of combat weapons, there are a multitude of options for offensive tools you can utilize in your skirmishes with the walking dead. There are also many defensive items that you can bring to bear that can stack the odds in your favor during a zombie encounter. Adding a few of these items to your arsenal will not only improve your chances of survival, but also make you a much more formidable opponent in undead battle.
Clothing
Your garments should be comfortable, close but not tight-fitting, and durable. Remember that during an attack, you will have ghouls clawing and pulling at your body. Clothing that is too loose will make it easier for the corpse to grab hold and hang on tight. At the same time, skintight clothing is not recommended, unless it is worn as a base layer with another outer layer for security. This recommendation is contrary to the popular opinion that tight clothing affords better protection from the grasp of an attacking zombie. This contrarian view is based on field reports of combat encounters in which a human defender wore extremely tight clothing, thinking it would provide better protection from a ghoul’s clutches. In reality, skintight clothing presents another, more serious hazard.
Recall the description of the undead grip in our earlier discussion on anatomy. The fingernails on a zombie can often be jagged and sharp, making its hands a common source of infection to humans. An individual wearing skintight garments who is grabbed by a ghoul suffers a greater chance of having the fabric rip and tear, exposing the vulnerable flesh underneath. A person wearing tight clothing also runs the risk of having a zombie grab a handful of flesh underneath—an extremely painful occurrence and common with larger, endocombatant types. It is far better to wear clothing that fits close to the body but also has flexibility in the material so that a ghoul does not end up with a fistful of skin and fabric.
Ensure that the clothing material is of adequate thickness, as it may also provide protection from unanticipated assaults. Combat records show that victims have survived a zombie’s attack simply because their clothing was sufficiently bulky to withstand bite penetration. Heavy leather coats make an excellent protective outer shell. Layering your outfit also helps prevent a zombie’s infected fingertips from penetrating several levels of fabric, into your flesh.
Goggles
When fighting in close combat with a zombie, there is always a remote risk of having contaminated fluid spray against you, the chances of which increase dramatically depending on your proximity to the ghoul. A vulnerable area for this type of contact is the eyes. Research has shown that just a single drop of contagious liquid landing on the surface of the cornea will eventually lead to infection, death, and reanimation. Shielding your eyes during close combat with the undead is one of the simplest things you can do to protect yourself from infection.
Any eyewear, be it sunglasses, reading lenses, or bifocals, affords some level of protection during undead combat. Ideal optical defensive wear forms a seal around the entire perimeter of the orbital sockets. Examples of such eyewear include swim goggles, laboratory safety lenses, and skydiving goggles. If you participate in any activities that require protective eye shields, such as skiing, ATV racing, or scuba diving, use the lenses you have as a first option, as you will already have broken them in and become accustomed to their fit. Be aware that some goggles limit your field of peripheral vision, possibly affecting your ability to detect an oncoming attack.
Gloves
Protecting your hands in undead combat can be an even greater concern than shielding your eyes. This is particularly true when engaged in close-quarters combat, in which you will be seizing ghouls that may bear gory, infected wounds. A single cut on your hand that comes into contact with a zombie’s open sores will end the battle in the ghoul’s favor. Although, like goggles, any hand protection is better than bare flesh, some types are preferable to others. Choose gloves made of nonporous materials, such as latex, nitrile rubber, or other synthetic material. Cloth or wool gloves are not the best alternative, as fluid can soak through and make contact with your skin. Tactical hand protection can also assist in your offensive attack by enabling you to grip your weapon easier, even if it is slick with congealed blood.
Face Mask
This piece of equipment may be unnecessary, especially for trained individuals who have learned to keep their mouth closed during close combat, but for those who desire additional protection, a face mask will prevent a mist of infected gore from landing between your lips. Face masks are porous for the obvious reason of allowing oxygen to pass through the material, but choose one that ensures a tight seal around the mouth cavity. A painter’s mask is your simplest, most inexpensive option. Face shields worn for sporting activities such as paintball also work well, as they were designed to safeguard against high-velocity fluid splatter.
Knee Pads
Defensive equipment protects your physique not only during battle, but also during the more mundane activities between combat engagements. During a zombie infestation, you may find yourself on your knees more often than you would expect. Whether you’re crawling through brush to avoid detection from humans and undead adversaries, taking a knee to steady your aim, or scurrying under barricades, protection may come in handy to safeguard the delicate bony structures surrounding the patella. Damaged knees may affect your ability to evade or outdistance an attacking horde before you can reach the next safe house or rescue station.
Night Vision Device (NVD)
Once available only to the military and professional security organizations, night vision technology has advanced such that its price point makes it accessible to the civilian population. Traveling at night is never recommended during a zombie siege. It is, however, sometimes unavoidable. Although both hunter and hunted are impacted by the lack of daylight, humans are at a greater disadvantage. Despite the darkness, the living dead seem to be uncannily effective at tracking down prey in the dead of night. An NVD can help level the playing field should you find yourself on an open road, miles from safety, with the sun setting on the horizon.
Nose Plugs
Plugging your nostrils may seem like a negligible consideration but could very well mean the difference between defending yourself effectively and becoming a vomiting, teary-eyed victim. Recall our previous discussion in which we described the power a ghoul possesses simply in its noxious presence. Those who are sensitive to strong odors need to be particularly mindful. Nose plugs will prevent your olfactory system from being overwhelmed by the unrelenting stench of a walking corpse. This piece of equipment may be most useful when you find yourself engaging zombies in confined spaces or in multiple numbers. When using this piece of equipment, your b
reathing must obviously be done through your open mouth, which also can present a combat risk. It is recommended that you use a face mask in conjunction with nose plugs if you do require their use. Holding your breath is not advised.
Forearm Guards
Also known as vambraces or bracers, this piece of protective equipment harkens back to a medieval age when archers protected their forearms from the snapping release of a drawn bowstring and knights guarded their arms from a slashing sword attack. Often made from leather or steel, bracers cover the area from wrist to elbow and can effectively shield against a repeated target of the living dead—the arms. Bracers are especially useful if you frequently engage in close-quarters combat or maneuver through narrow spaces during zombie-clearing operations, as this equipment makes freeing yourself from a ghoul’s clutches on your arms that much easier.
Shin Guards
Another defensive item that has its origins in medieval history, shin guards, or greaves, protect the lower leg from knee to ankle. The modern equivalents of this ancient protective gear are the leg guards worn by athletes in sports such as hockey or lacrosse. Depending on the environment in which you normally operate, greaves may or may not prove to be a useful addition to your defensive outfit. Individuals in a jungle environment or those who regularly traverse heavily weeded areas, where ghouls may remain camouflaged in the brush, would benefit most from this type of protection. Full greaves, which protect both the front and back of the entire lower leg, are more effective than those that only guard the shin area, because the calf and Achilles’ heel regions are vulnerable to attack by crawling ghouls.
