It took her a few moments to learn how to control the arm of the crane but she soon got the hang of it and she raised the arm to its greatest height. It was immediately obvious that the crane was not tall enough. The first idea had failed.
Ellie lowered the lifting arm and as she did so two wooden-winged angels buzzed close by. She had been spotted. The angels banged off a couple of stings, which bounced harmlessly off the metal truck. Then they hurried away to report back to the Christmas Fairy. Now the Christmas Fairy would marshal her troops and they would surely attack, and Ellie had not even managed to open the cupboard door yet.
Blondie’s army was already in big trouble.
12 The Battle Rages
‘Plan B,’ announced Ellie, back at the camp. ‘And as quick as you can. Max, I’m sorry. The crane didn’t work. It’s down to you.’
Ellie had hoped to avoid Plan B, which was a lot more dangerous than Plan A. It meant using the fire engine and its long extending ladder to climb up to the door handle. The problem was that Ellie was too big to climb the ladder. It would have to be Max. More worryingly, it left Max exposed to all the angels as he climbed. He would have to wear a protective layer of armour, which would make climbing awkward, to say the least. Ellie felt guilty about making Max take on this dangerous task, but there was no other option.
They hunted around for some kind of armour and eventually a stegosaurus nosed out a pile of pin-on badges. They had Christmas messages written on them. One said: CHRISTMAS IS COMING! Another said: I HATE XMAS PUDDING! There were many more. It was a struggle fixing them on, but at last Max was reasonably well sting-proofed. The penguins then helped themselves to the badge pile. They were going to use them as shields.
They got the fire engine out and Max clattered on board, his badges banging together. Now they needed to get to the Cupboard Under the Stairs as quickly as possible, before the angels could mount an attack. The door slid open, Ellie put her foot on the gas and the fire engine shot across the Empty Room with the penguins waddling behind as fast as they could to catch up.
Max climbed on to the ladder clutching a coil of string with a small weight on one end. As the ladder began to lift and extend he was carried higher and higher and he paid out the string so that one end remained on the ground, held fast by a large group of penguins. At last Max reached the door handle, and there was no sign of the angels – yet.
Max slipped the weighted end of the string over the handle and allowed it to lower itself to the ground. Here it was immediately gathered in by some penguins and they passed it round the heavy weight that had been left behind when the crane attempt was abandoned. The main group now hauled on the other end of the string, while Max began his descent.
The weight slowly rose from the ground and pulled down the door handle. With a faint click the door opened a fraction. A triumphant cheer went up from the penguins and they began to stream towards the opening. At that very same moment the angels launched their attack.
They came screaming down from above, wave after wave, scattering the penguins in every direction. The weight came crashing back down, missing the fire engine by a mere fraction. Stings began to zing past Max’s ears and thud into the woodwork behind him. Many pinged off his armour, but some got through, finding gaps here and there and piercing the backs of his legs and arms. He tried not to cry out, but sometimes he couldn’t help himself. It was as if he was surrounded by angry wasps.
Max almost fell down the last section of ladder before throwing himself into the shelter of the driver’s cab. Ellie flung her arms round him, squeezing him tightly before doing a sharp reverse away from the door. They raced straight back to the safety of the camp.
In the meantime the penguins were bravely trying to regroup and hold off the angel attack, but with little success. Reinforcements were needed and Blondie and Aysha rolled out in their tanks. This was better! Angels began to tumble from the sky as the tanks pounded them with hundreds and thousands.
It was clear that a massive battle had begun, and it was going to be decisive. It was win or lose, Christmas or no Christmas ever again. And Father Christmas himself was due to arrive at any moment. Ellie and Max had to get into the Cupboard Under the Stairs.
The angel commanders were quick to see that they were being overpowered by the two tanks and immediately sent for their own. They arrived with an enormous rumbling noise – not two, but four tanks, bigger and more powerful than Blondie’s. The Christmas Fairy’s tanks didn’t deal with piddling little ammunition such as hundreds and thousands. They were loaded with the heavy silver, red and green balls that went on fairy cakes. It was fairy ammunition, and it was devastating.
Penguins were blasted to bits, sending splinters of plastic flying through the air. Then the biggest of the Christmas Fairy’s tanks turned its sights on Blondie and Aysha. The new tank was fearsome, capable of firing off round after round of whole jellybeans.
Blondie’s tank was pounded so hard that it spun round and faced backwards. She struggled to regain control but she was a sitting duck. The next round hit her broadside and toppled the tank on to its side. Blondie scrambled out, quickly followed by her crew of three choirboys. They fled for safety, covered by the brave penguins.
Back at the camp the injured fighters were being brought back for treatment. A quiet, efficient team of Marys saw to their needs and patched them up as best they could. Many of them staggered back out to continue fighting. They were trying to save Christmas for The World.
Aysha’s tank turret got a direct jellybean hit and burst into flames. Having only just reached the shelter of the camp, Ellie and Max dashed straight back out in the fire engine. They zigzagged around falling debris and injured fighters before screeching to a halt beside the stricken tank. Aysha was still inside, trapped by the flames. Ellie ran out the hose while Max started the water pumps. They were easy targets for the buzzing angels and they both came under a barrage of stings.
Blondie sent out a large force of shepherds to help. They had been specially trained and now they used their extra-long shepherds’ crooks to great effect. They whirled and swirled them in the air, catching angels that dared to fly too low and knocking them out of the sky. It gave Ellie and Max just enough of a break to drag Aysha from the burning tank and carry her to the safety of the camp.
Blondie bent over her friend anxiously, but Ellie quickly reassured her that she was just a bit concussed and would recover. Blondie was relieved but not happy.
‘My scouts ’ave reported that Father Christmas’s sleigh ’as landed. ’E’ll come walkin’ through that front door any minute.’
‘We can’t delay any longer,’ muttered Ellie. ‘We have to get inside the cupboard. It’s our only chance. Is the crack team ready?’
Blondie nodded and called them over. They were more of a motley bunch than a crack team, but there had been little time to train them. The ever-loyal penguins eagerly huddled together. Several elephants, camels, hippos and rhinoceroses had been drafted in from a collection of arks. Hopefully they knew what they had to do, and the first thing was to get across to the Cupboard Under the Stairs, on the far side of the Empty Room. Ellie peeped out at the raging battle ahead of them.
Blondie shook her head. ‘You ain’t finkin’ of goin’ out there an’ just wanderin’ across to that cupboard, are you? You’ll be spifflicated, girl! I’ve got a better idea. Let’s get some steam up!’ The commander nodded towards a large tin train with several carriages. ‘Climb on board. You’re goin’ for the ride of your life!’
They would make a dash for it, as simple as that. The troops boarded the train, which waited patiently as far back from the sliding door as possible, building up a head of steam. It would need as much speed as possible before heading into the battle. The last passenger to board was Dippy, crouching down as best he could in an open wagon at the rear.
The train sat there, huffing, puffing – quietly quivering with power. Max and Ellie climbed into the driver’s cab. Blondie stood by the
sliding door and gave the signal. The brakes were released. The wheels spun furiously, striking sparks from the floor and then the train began to surge forward, straight for the door. At the last moment Blondie’s penguins slid back the door and the train burst out into the midst of the battle, heading straight for the wall immediately next to the cupboard door.
Fighting warriors threw themselves out of the engine’s storming path. The Christmas Fairy’s tanks immediately tried to get their sights fixed on the speeding juggernaut. Jellybeans exploded around the train, spurting up from the ground in great clouds of sugar and splintered candy. The Dove of Peace swooped over several times, dropping her payload of splatter bombs, but so far the train had escaped damage.
It reached the far side of the Empty Room and began to slow. It was still going much too fast to avoid a collision, but it allowed the crack team to fling themselves from the carriages. They tumbled and rolled across the ground, picked themselves up, ran for the open cupboard door and sheltered inside.
Meanwhile the train, with only Dippy still on board in the last carriage, thundered headlong into the wall. With a screech of tortured tin, the carriages were shunted on top of one another, piling up into a mountain of mangled metal. Wheels twisted off their axles and rolled away. The final wagon toppled over on its side.
Dippy took one glance behind at the chaos that surrounded him and hurried into the cupboard. Together, the toys put their backs to the door and pushed. Slowly the door swung wide open.
Ellie was delighted. Not only had they got the door open but the effect it had on the Christmas Fairy’s troops was electric. Half of them fled in terror, thinking that they were about to be overwhelmed by a monster from the depths of the cupboard.
Ellie and her troops whooped and cheered in triumph, but the Christmas Fairy had not lost the battle by any means. Her answer was simple and devastating. The door to the rebel camp was thrown open and there stood – MARZIPAN MAN!
13 Marzipanned!
He was huge. He was vast, and he was marzipan from top to toe. He towered above everything, staring down with his sugar lozenge eyes at the tiny warriors fighting their tiny battle. Inside his massive body hundreds of snowmen toiled away to make him move. He stepped forward, rocking slightly. Behind him masses of snowmen with brooms came marching, ready to finally sweep the floor clear of the enemy.
Marzipan Man raised the Mega-Marzipanator, and pulled the trigger.
SPLURRRPPP!!!
A giant stream of marzipan squirted out of the barrel and smacked down on a group of penguins, smearing them against the floor. With every step that Marzipan Man took the floor shuddered. Now he slowly turned to face the Cupboard Under the Stairs. Once again he raised his gun and –
SPLURRRPPPP!
This time a great dollop splattered down by the doorframe. Sitting astride an elephant, Ellie turned to her troops.
‘Get that electric plug in! Get that tube out!’
The penguins seized the electric plug and carried it above their heads to the nearest socket. Carefully they got the three metal prongs ready to slide into the socket. This was Dippy’s moment. Unmoved by the stings that the angels showered down on him, he swung his tail back as far he could and then, with a great THWACK!! he whipped his tail round and rammed the plug fairly and squarely into the socket.
Meanwhile a second group of penguins, teddy bears, camels and elephants struggled to bring out the vacuum cleaner hose. They stood at the ready, waiting for Ellie’s command.
SPLURRRPPP-A-DURRRPPP!!!!
Marzipan Man had just marzipanned half the plug-penguins, splattering them against the skirting board. He swung his Mega-Marzipanator towards Ellie and the tube gang.
‘Switch on, Max!’ yelled Ellie. ‘Now!’
Inside the cupboard, Max was ready. He had managed to clamber halfway up the side of the vacuum cleaner, along with Blondie and Aysha, and now the three of them were balanced on a large plastic clip. The trio would only get one chance to get this right. They held hands and Max counted down.
‘Three, two, one, JUMP!’
Still holding hands, the three friends leaped into the air. They fell rapidly, faster and faster until KER-THUMPP! They landed slap-bang on the power button.
The vacuum cleaner roared into life and the tube was almost ripped out of Ellie’s grasp as she and the penguins struggled to control it.
‘Tube holders – forward march!’ cried Ellie, from her elephant, and they began to carry the air-swallowing monster straight towards Marzipan Man.
SPLURRRPPP!
A great splat of marzipan thudded down right beside them, knocking one or two of the tube gang off their feet. More penguins came hurrying over to replace them. Bit by bit the tube moved forward. A great wind was now sucking around Marzipan Man’s feet, making him rock even more. It was difficult for him to aim and he began to fire at random. Great gobbets of marzipan splatted against the walls, floor and ceiling, sometimes splattering his own troops.
The Christmas Fairy was beside herself, jerking and twisting more and more crazily. ‘Where’s my Dove of Peace!’ she screamed. ‘Splatter them! Splat them to bits!’
The bird swooped across the room and dropped a splatter bomb. It hit the tube behind the troops but failed to do anything other than knock everyone off their feet for a moment. They were soon back at work and the Dove came in on another bombing run.
Max was now at the cupboard door, watching the battle that still raged. It was a touch-and-go situation. If Ellie and the tube gang got a direct hit that would be it. The plan would fail. But how could he take out the Dove of Peace?
Max raced round the edge of the room, occasionally fighting his way past a rebel warrior, until he reached their old HQ. Once inside he hurried straight across to a camouflaged toy helicopter. Switching on the power, the ’copter lit up all over as its rotor blades whizzed into action.
Max lifted from the ground, turned the chopper towards the sliding door and neatly clattered out into the thick of the battle. He zoomed into the air, scattering angels in every direction. He wheeled round to seek out the Dove and soon the two of them were locked in a dogfight, with Max spraying the Dove with hundreds and thousands, trying to stop it from dropping any further bombs.
Meanwhile Ellie was still urging her elephant forward, dragging the vacuum cleaner nozzle and sucking away at Marzipan Man. The power of the vacuum was so strong that flecks of marzipan began to be stripped away from the giant’s feet and vanish up the tube. The flecks soon became blobs, which became great lumps of the revolting stuff. Marzipan Man began to slowly collapse as more and more marzipan disappeared from his lower body and got sucked inside the vacuum cleaner. It really had become a monster.
‘No!’ screeched the Christmas Fairy. ‘My magnificent Marzipan Man, all going up the spout! It’s not fair! Stop! Stop! My troops! Where are you? Fight them! Destroy them!’
But at that moment Marzipan Man began his last, slow collapse. Like a tower block being demolished, he disintegrated from the bottom up, spilling hundreds of snowmen to the ground where they landed, splat, in the spreading slop of marzipan.
In the final stage of collapse an enormous wave of marzipan was sent racing across the floor like a tsunami. It caught up the Christmas Fairy on its crest and was only stopped when it reached the wall.
SPLOPP!!
The Christmas Fairy found herself stuck firmly halfway up the wall. To add insult to injury she was immediately bombed by her own Dove of Peace. Max had finally fired off the chopper’s twin liquorice torpedoes and scored a direct hit. The Dove went into a spiral dive, crashing into the wall just above the Christmas Fairy and releasing its entire payload of splatter bombs on top of her head.
The battle was over. The battle was won.
14 More Marzipan. Is This the End?
When Father Christmas walked into the Christmas Shop he was shocked to say the least.
‘This place has been hit by a tornado,’ he muttered crossly, picking his way ginge
rly across the floor in search of toys for his sack.
Ellie and Max peeped out from behind the sliding door. There he was, Father Christmas himself!
‘What do we do now?’ asked Max. ‘It’s Christmas and we’re not home. We’re stuck here for ever, aren’t we?’
But Ellie was studying her pyjamas. Surely they would come to the rescue? After all, it was the Cosmic Pyjamas that had brought them both here. It was the Cosmic Pyjamas that had provided them with that stick of dynamite just at the right moment. And it was the Cosmic Pyjamas that had twice sent them important messages. Surely they would take them home?
That was when the little picture of their house appeared. Ellie grabbed Max and showed him. He wasn’t impressed.
‘It’s only a picture,’ he complained. ‘It’s not doing anything and we’re still here.’
Ellie had more faith. She knew it was time to say goodbye to Blondie, Aysha and all their new friends. That was hard, because they had fought a massive battle together, they had survived and, above all, they had won.
‘Can’t thank you enough,’ said Blondie. ‘I ’ave to say I thought you were a bit of a – what do you call it in your world? A prawn?’
‘Prat?’ suggested Ellie, with a little giggle.
‘Yeah. That’s what I thought when you arrived. But you’ve both been brilliant.’
Aysha peered out at Father Christmas and grinned. ‘We’re free to leave at last,’ she said. ‘Any minute now Father Christmas will come in here and pick us up for his sack. We shall be free and everyone can have Christmas. And that’s thanks to you and Max.’
‘Max!’ cried Ellie. ‘Look at the windows on the house!’ Ellie lifted her sleeve. The picture was still there, quivering, but now, at the windows, Mum and Dad were waving to them.
The Battle for Christmas Page 6
