by Lucy Lambert
I texted Vick.
“He’s on his way. Should be with you in 15,” I typed, pecking out all the letters and numbers as slowly as I could with my thumbs. I hit send.
He replied about five seconds later with a, “See you soon.”
I got up, shoved my phone into my pocket and left my room. My steps boomed loudly up and down the stairs, and before I knew it I stood just inside the main doors, looking out across the fields of dead grass and naked trees, waiting for Adam to pull up.
The ten minutes he quoted me ran out. For a few moments there, I hoped that he might have changed his mind on the whole thing, or had been overcome with that urge to transform and had gone to hide himself away in the basement.
Then I saw someone, hands stuffed into the pockets of a leather jacket and head down, walking quickly towards my dorm.
He quickly came into the light thrown out from the doors. Adam pulled his hands from his pockets and ran through his hair as he looked at me.
When he smiled, I forced myself to return one of my own. I pushed the door open and found it frigid outside. It was so cold that little ice crystals seemed to float in the oddly windless night. I hunched my shoulders as my body tried to withdraw into itself for some heat.
“Hey,” I said.
“Hi.”
When Adam saw the look on my face, he glanced away for a moment. He was looking in the direction of the Arnold building, which of course couldn’t be seen from here.
It seemed somehow poetic that they found her there, as well as ironic, since we hadn’t discovered her in our own search of the campus.
“You heard about the body?” he said.
“Yeah,” I said. I could feel my resolve to get this over with growing now, with him here.
It galled me that he would even talk about her. It didn’t matter the pain I heard in his voice, or the way his stubbled cheeks crinkled with barely contained grief.
We were taking too long, standing there staring at the ground awkwardly. Vick would wait, though. I’d already given him the signal.
Using the heat of my anger to ward off the cold, I put my hand on his shoulder to make him look at me.
“Come on, let’s get to the library.”
When I tried to take my hand away, he caught it. I didn’t think it was possible, but my body stiffened even more at his touch. It took every little bit of willpower I had to not yank myself from his grip, and to force my arm to relax so that he couldn’t feel that tension.
“You really found something about the curse?”
We started walking down the path that led past the soccer pitch.
Only a little bit longer, I told myself. You can take anything for a few moments, no matter how bad.
“Yeah, I don’t think anyone’s even opened it in decades. It nearly fell apart!”
“I just need this out of my so bad. You have no idea how it feels to know you’ve done something so awful. And I can’t even tell myself it will never happen again, you know?”
“I know,” I said.
This time, when he gave my fingers a squeeze, I returned the reassuring gesture.
Up ahead, there was a chalk mark on the sidewalk. It was a rough square, almost the size of the cement segment. All I had to do was get him into that little zone and stand back.
“What’s up? Your heart is racing!” Adam said.
Why did he have to talk like that, to explain how guilty and terrible he felt? I even still found him handsome, despite his tattered appearance.
Nothing excuses evil like good looks, apparently.
“It’s nothing…” I said, trying to quicken our pace.
I could feel the tension in his arm increasing the longer I refused to look at him. You didn’t need heightened senses to know when someone you trusted acted strangely.
He said something, but I couldn’t hear him over the roar of my pulse. I thought my heart would burst as we both set foot in that chalk mark cage.
I stopped and took a step back as though looking for something on the ground.
“What is it? What did you drop?” Adam said.
Why did the actual act have to be so easy? He turned a slow circle in the chalk square, trying to help me find what I pretended I’d lost.
I took another step back from him, unsure how far away I needed to be. I raked the line of trees and brush on the other side with my eyes, looking for any sign of Vick.
Now! I thought. Do it now!
We were so close to the spot where Adam rescued me from Eric and Joseph. If I turned around, I knew I could see the lights from my dorm, so close and so distant. Just like with me, those rays would be no help to Adam.
“I’m sorry,” I said.
“Me too.”
“I wish there was another way.”
“There isn’t. You didn’t have to lie to me, you know. I would have come willingly,” he said.
I opened my mouth to say more, but a shadow leapt from the bushes. Adam saw it right away. I knew that even as a human, he was strong and fast. He could have done something to stop it. But he didn’t.
He just looked at me as Vick jabbed a taser against his neck. The little device clicked as it sent thousands of volts through Adam’s body, instantly locking all his muscles in place. He groaned as he fell to the ground, trembling and writhing.
Vick, dressed all in black, pulled a needle from a pouch on his belt. I winced as he rammed it down into Adam’s thigh and shoved the plunger in with his thumb.
Adam’s struggles ceased a moment later as his body relaxed. I couldn’t keep myself from watching the whole thing, my eyes stinging as I resisted the urge to blink. It felt wrong not to see the consequences of my actions.
It was the right thing. I had to do it. It needed to be done. I kept telling myself all that, but even in my mind the words were hollow.
“Is… is he dead?” I said. It felt like my feet were anchored right where they were.
Vick hadn’t really shared anything with me about the plan after this. What was in that needle? Whatever it was, it worked quickly. I doubted Adam really felt anything aside from the tasering.
“No.”
“But… I thought you were going to kill him?” I said.
Vick pulled off the black balaclava he had on. His hair was a little messed up, and he breathed heavily as he looked down at his catch. It was like he couldn’t quite believe it, either.
“I am… I have to. But not here. There’s a ceremony. My family has to witness it.”
I felt happy that I hadn’t eaten anything in hours. If there was any food in my, I’d probably toss it all up right then. Vick didn’t say anything about any sacrificial ceremony when he shared the plan with me.
It was getting even more difficult for me to be okay with all this.
“What? Tonight? Here?” I said.
Vick pulled his cell out of his pocket. It lit his face with its ghostly glow as he tapped out a message to someone. He shoved it back into his pocket and looked around, making sure no one caught us in the middle of our crime.
“No. There’s a place… Look, I can’t really tell you. You need to go now. They’ll be here soon to get us.”
“But… how are you?” I said.
I didn’t even know how you killed a werewolf. Was it like in the movies where you had to shoot them with a silver bullet, or beat them over the head with a silver club?
Both of those possibilities painted awful pictures in my mind’s eye. I leaned forward, hands on my knees, feeling my stomach lurch inside me. Bile lapped and burned at the back of my throat.
This was wrong. It was so wrong. Every part of me seemed to agree on that except the rational part of my mind, which kept trying to tell me that Adam needed to answer for his crime, and never be allowed to do anything like that again.
“Vick…” I said, finally able to urge my feet to take a step towards Adam’s still body.
Somewhere in the distance, the purr of an engine started getting louder. Vick to
ok a protective position over Adam as though I was about to deny him his entry to manhood. He even got out his taser, though it wavered uncertainly in his grip.
“Go, Stephanie. Now. Don’t worry, we did the right thing. You owe it to yourself to concentrate on school, now. Forget about all this, about me, about Adam. It’s going to work out,” he said.
Was he trying to convince me, or himself? I knew then that he felt just as strange and unsure about this as I did.
The engine got even louder. The brakes squeaked as it pulled it to some stop sign nearby.
“Go, Stephanie! You heard Adam. He knows he deserves this. You heard him when he said there’s no other way.”
Headlights appeared, shining through the branches and the brush. It was one of those big white cargo vans. In a few moments, they’d be close enough to haul Adam into the back and take him on to his final destination.
“Please!” Vick said. He turned the taser on. A blue arc of electricity moved between its prongs, crackling menacingly.
I took a deep breath and let it shudder out of my lungs. With one final look at Adam Arnold, I turned and ran back to my door. The sound of those squealing brakes chased me, and then the opening and slamming of doors as Vick’s monster hunting family members got out to help him load his catch.
Back up in my room, I wrenched my laptop open, nearly breaking one of the hinges. I didn’t care. It again woke to the news article on Redeemer’s website. I brought up Facebook instead. My fingers were still numb from the cold, and it took a few tries to tap in Jenn’s name in the search bar.
Her profile came up. It had been officially locked by Facebook staff. All you could do now was put messages up on the wall and look at the photos and information that was there before.
It was full of long memorials from family members. I even saw something up there from Jim, and another message from Cheryl.
I clicked on her profile picture and made myself look into her smiling eyes.
“It’s done,” I said, “He’s gone. It’s okay, right? Everything’s okay, now. Everything’s good.”
I sounded like Vick those few minutes earlier, trying to convince myself more than anything else.
I couldn’t look at her anymore, though. I slammed the laptop closed and threw myself back onto the bed. The mattress groaned. I pulled out my phone, opened the contacts menu, and scrolled down to my mom’s number.
It was almost midnight here. Back in California, it was pretty late. She was probably asleep, and I didn’t think they’d even allow a call through at this time of night anyway.
I just needed to talk to her, though. Right then, I just wanted to hear the sound of my mother’s voice. She’d be able to tell right away that there was something wrong. I couldn’t tell her the truth of it. Not that she’d believe me, anyway. But, like a good mom, she’d try to sooth me and make me feel better. She’d tell me everything was okay, and I’d believe her because she was my mother, even though I’d also know it was a pretty little lie to make life a little less unbearable.
It was selfish, though. Even though I knew she was doing better, she was still sick. The cancer hadn’t disappeared. She needed her rest more than I needed comfort, or so I told myself.
So I held my hand out over the side of the bed and let the cell slip out of my fingers. Something cracked when it hit the floor.
Leaving all the lights on, bothering only long enough to struggle out of my jacket and kick my shoes off, I wound the covers around my body and forced my eyes shut. I didn’t know if I’d be able to sleep, but I had to try.
Chapter 33
The next day, I sat in Dr. Hackett’s history class. The room was unusually quiet, despite being nearly full.
Whispered conversations crested to a certain noise level, when everyone realized they were getting progressively louder, and then died down. It was like watching the tide roll in and out.
Despite all the warm bodies, the room felt chilly enough that I didn’t bother shrugging out of my sweater.
The base fear and worry in the room even had a faint but unmistakable odor to it that linger like an invisible mist over everything. The heated air blowing down out of the vents overhead, the ducts rattling almost silently, couldn’t dispel it.
Everyone was still upset or frightened over what had happened, it seemed. None of them knew that the killer had been caught last night, and that now they were safe.
But of course, I was the only person in the room that knew the truth. Now that I thought about it, things were probably going to get even worse. At some point, someone would notice that Adam had gone missing.
Would Vick and his family leave any remains to be found? Or would Adam just be listed as a troubled young man who had simply disappeared one day, never to be seen anywhere by anyone ever again?
If nothing had happened last night, he’d be sitting in this lecture with me right now.
“Okay, everyone, time to settle down…” Professor Hackett said, holding up his hands for quiet.
It took him a second to realize everyone already had quieted down. It seemed this thing threw off the rhythm of the entire school.
I looked around the room as I pulled my notepad out and set it on my desk. I recognized many of the faces, but only because I’d seen them so many times already.
Jim and the twins didn’t share any classes with me. Adam would of course no longer be attending this lecture. Jenn was gone from my English class.
Strangers sat in the seats beside me. Both the real friends I’d made at school were gone, and I was alone again.
Except for Eric, I guess. Though he was firmly in the enemy camp, and he was only in my English lecture.
Professor Hackett started his lecture on pre-Civil War people and politics. Normally, I liked listening to his smoke-roughened voice. Today, I couldn’t really do anything but contemplate my future at Redeemer.
I started scratching out the title of the first lecture slide, most of my mind otherwise engaged.
I was sure Jim would invite me to more of his parties. Didn’t he put up some Facebook event about some sort of memorial get together later this week?
It didn’t matter; I wasn’t going. Jenn introduced me to that bunch, and Jenn was gone now. It would just feel awkward being there, and without her I knew I couldn’t belong.
I’d also first met Adam through them. I was sure Jim would be full of stories about him, too, when they discovered Adam missing.
Two very good reasons to sever, I figured.
It seemed I had so many good reasons for doing things lately. Good reasons for helping get rid of Adam, good reasons to tell myself that it had been the right thing to do.
All those good reasons seemed to result in things that made me feel even worse about myself, however.
So I decided then to just throw myself in to school. I knew I was in danger of losing that scholarship if I let things slip even more than they already had.
So, giving my head a bit of a shake, I forced my attention onto Professor Hackett. He wandered back and forth in front of the first row of seats, raising his hands and weaving them through the air as he discussed the importance of southern cotton plantations to the English economy.
I started scribbling frantically, trying to get everything written on the current slide down while still paying attention to him.
Yes, school could carry me through all this. All I had to do was ride that rising tide and let it carry me through the years so that time could eventually bury all these awful events and terrible feelings.
Chapter 34
Everything was going according to plan. It had been a couple days since Vick took Adam, and I’d succeeded in brushing those thoughts to random ones in the middle of the day and nightmares to wake me in the middle of the night.
Outside, it was snowing! When I woke up that morning and threw my curtains back, I actually smiled.
It was so weird, watching the little puffy flakes drift down through the air in front of my window. There w
as even a light carpeting of them on the ground, covering up the dull brown of the dead grass with an even, pearly whiteness.
It was my first chance to actually use the winter boots I’d picked up. They were black, and my boot cut jeans went with them nicely.
I dressed hurriedly, wanting to get out there before the horde of students churned those virgin fields with their own boots. A spark of excitement shot up through me as I looked down, leaning across my desk. Was there enough on the ground for snow angels?
I was going to find out.
I’d stayed up until about two in the morning the night before, finally finishing with Jane Eyre for the English lecture today. I’d expected to wake up haggard and tired.
Outside, the air smelled different. Fresher, somehow. Crisp. I turned my face up and closed my eyes, letting a few of those cold flakes land on my cheeks. They melted right away, the cool water running down my neck and making me shiver.
Today was different, in a good way. The thin blanket of snow covered everything up, reflected the sunlight managing to punch through the clouds above to cast everything in a different light.
It crunched under my feet, and I almost slipped a couple times on the way to the Arnold building. About half way there, I picked up the pace, realizing I would be late if a lollygagged any longer admiring the scenery.
All the other walkers I passed also seemed to have sensed the change in things. They were louder, happier.
As I turned to walk up the path to the Arnold building, two guys even tossed snowballs at each other. I stopped as one of their throws went wild and whizzed past me to burst on the ground a few feet away.
“Sorry!” one guy said, both of them smiling.
I laughed and made my way to the building, and then to the lecture hall.
I got in just as the professor came over to close the doors. She gave me a look.
“Sorry,” I said.
“Go, take your seat,” she said.
Not such a great start to the lecture, but I was ready. I knew I’d understand what she said, that I wouldn’t be in the dark when she referenced this or that event. I scanned the rows of seats, looking for a good spot.
