The gag was torn roughly away and she gasped for air as she blinked hard, finally able to force her heavy eyes open. The most amazing blue gaze stared back at her. Shawn’s broad shoulders filled up her field of view. When she tried to look away, he gripped her chin.
“No,” he said softly. “Shhh. Don’t look. Close your eyes again. I’ll untie you and I’ll take you out of here. I’ll take you back to your father.” He soothed her with a gentle hand. He cupped her chin, caressed her cheek with his rough, calloused fingers. “It’s all over. You’ll be home soon. I promise.”
“You’re alive,” Kayla whispered, hardly able to form the words. “Are you hurt?”
“No,” he said softly, soothing her. “I can see you aren’t either. It’s a lucky thing that Draydon used that damn table from the hall like a shield and that Drake is a good shot. I didn’t like the plan, but there was nothing else we could do.”
“Damn rights I’m a straight shot,” a voice sounded off to her left. Drake himself. “The best. Didn’t spend all those years practicing for nothing. She wasn’t in any danger, unless it came from Marcello himself. I never would have hit her.”
Kayla gave herself a shake. She wasn’t nearly as confident as Drake Cannelli was. She couldn’t believe any of it. She kept her eyes shut, as Shawn commanded. She didn’t want to open them and see the horror around her. “You… I… we’re still here,” she gasped instead.
“Yes,” Shawn said roughly. “I’m getting you out. I’m getting out too. I’ve had enough of this to last a lifetime.”
Kayla’s heart hammered so hard that she felt like it was going to rip out of her chest. Scalding tears spilled down her cheeks and her sinuses burned. Her throat was so dry that she could barely swallow, but she forced out the words she’d never forgive herself for not saying.
“I’ve spent so much time,” she gasped… “So much time trying not to feel anything. Too much time. I… you- it’s- it’s different with you. I- it doesn’t make any sense. I don’t know why it’s you, but- don’t disappear. I- I need you. I- please. Shawn… I know it’s crazy, but I told myself that if I got through this that I’d tell you no matter what…”
Shawn’s brows knit together. “Tell me what?” He didn’t move away to untie her and she kept her eyes on him, not on what the other guys were doing in the room. Shawn was right. She’d seen enough horror in her life already.
“I- I don’t want to go home. I- it’s all different now. I can’t live like that. Like a shell. I want- just don’t disappear, Shawn, please. If you leave, don’t leave me behind. I- you might be an asshole. You might be a cocky jerk with a big mouth. You might drive me nuts, but you’re the first person I’ve felt anything for at all. You showed me what it was like to be awake again. To want to… to actually live again. So even if you’re a smart mouth and even if you’ll probably drive me nuts, please… just- we could have died. We could have died here, but we didn’t- that has to- mean something…”
When he said nothing, her eyes flew open and she gazed up into his face. Maybe he didn’t want her. Maybe he didn’t want anything to do with her. Maybe he hadn’t felt any of it either. Maybe that thread that joined their hearts hadn’t actually reached his. Maybe she’d just imagined all of it. It was crazy, to think that all of this… the horrible, tragic loss of life, the terrible things her father had done, the blood and the death… that it could be a fresh start, a start to something beautiful for both of them. The real starting of their lives after they’d both been asleep for so many years.
Shawn didn’t blink. Those incredible ocean blue eyes remained locked with hers. They weren’t cold like the first time she’d stared into them. They were warm. Warm and alive and full of… of everything. Sadness, pain, fear, but shining through all of that, a glimmer of… of hope.
“You’re a pain in the ass too. You have a smart mouth. You’re sassy and annoying. You’re probably a brat. You’re far too pretty for your own good. I’m going to leave here. I’m going to go back home and see my mom. I don’t know why the hell you’d want to tag along…”
“I want to,” Kayla said breathlessly. “You need someone to keep you out of trouble.”
Shawn inclined his head and a ghost of a smile formed on his lips. “Alright then. Don’t say that I didn’t warn you.”
“Warn me about what-” Kayla didn’t get a chance to finish.
Shawn’s lips crashed down on hers, they were rough and alive and burned straight down to her soul. He bruised her lips, chasing away the pain, the demons, the nightmare that had been her life the past day… no, the nightmare that had been her life for so much longer. She didn’t even realize she was trapped, caged like a wild animal who needed to be free.
Shawn brutalized her lips like he’d been kissing her his entire life and knew just what she needed. He kissed her like it was the first time. He kissed her like it was the last time. He kissed her like one heart who knew it needed the other, even if it defied logic and beat all the odds. He kissed her like there might actually be some kind of a future.
She had a future. A good one. A great one. She’d work her ass off until it happened. No more ghosting through life. No more being an unfeeling zombie, trying to block out the pain and the grief just so she could make it through another day. She’d never viewed her life as a gift. It was something to be endured. Sure she had hopes and goals, but she had them to get from point A to point B, to try and just… survive.
She was done. She was done with just surviving. She could have died there, tied to the bed, but she hadn’t. Other men had. Men who had died trying to save her and free her. Men who died because of decisions other men made.
It had to stop. All of it.
It was time that she truly started living.
Epilogue
SHAWN
It was true what they said, about opposites attracting. Or maybe he and Kayla really weren’t that different after all. They were both stubborn. They could both be a pain in the ass. They both knew how to put their head down, dig in their heels, and get shit taken care of. Turned out, they both loved the sun, the ocean, and living a simple life.
A year and a half as a free man taught Shawn that he had many undiscovered passions and hidden talents. He’d even found, though Kayla had to be the one to give him a kick in the ass, that he enjoyed cooking.
They had that in common too.
So maybe they weren’t really that different after all, at least not where it really mattered.
And where it really mattered, as corny as it sounded, was the heart.
Shawn had been methodically dicing up peppers. His knife glinted in the sunshine that spilled through the large kitchen windows. They’d just had their lunch rush and were on to the afternoon lull, the hot part of the day where every living being took refuge. Their kitchen staff worked split shifts and wouldn’t be on again until before four, when the dinner crowd started filing in.
He glanced over at the stacks of mushrooms, bags of onions, and heads of lettuce, all waiting his preparation. He would never have seen himself slaving away over vegetables, but god, he loved it. He loved the predictability of restaurant life. It was hard work, but they had a schedule. He loved the people, the guests and the staff. Most of all, he loved calling his own shots, even if, in the end, he answered to Kayla, since she was the boss.
“You have that look on your face,” the boss said, as she strode happily into the kitchen. Kayla was like that, a beam of sunlight and warmth wherever she went. There wasn’t a soul who met her who didn’t love her in some way or other. So really, he’d never stood a chance.
Shawn’s hand stilled as he looked up. He marveled at how little he used to smile. Or laugh. He was a sarcastic asshole, that much was true, but he’d never really had a reason to be happy. Now, he laughed all the time. It was like he’d been carrying around a truckload of bricks on his back for years and after meeting Kayla, he’d finally learned how to dump them. She’d taught him. It was her laughter, her hopes, her d
reams, her joy that saved him.
“What look is that? The look where I chase you around this kitchen, strip you naked, toss you on the counter, and fuck you until you can’t remember your name?”
Kayla’s already flushed cheeks went scarlet. “Shawn,” she hissed, though she couldn’t contain a smile. “No! Well- yes… but we’ve had that conversation. It wouldn’t be sanitary.”
“So you just came in to help me with the mountains of prep we have to get done?” he asked hopefully.
“Nope. I- I know that we’re technically supposed to be closed for a couple hours, but I never lock the front door and-”
“The tourists never read the signs.” Shawn rolled his eyes. “I’ll get rid of them for you. Or do you want to serve them? Drinks only. Be firm. You never can turn people away.”
Kayla rolled her eyes and her hands flew to her hips. She was pretty that way, all spicy and ready to do battle. She was pretty all the time. One day soon he was going to work up the courage to ask her if she’d have his sorry ass as her husband.
They’d taken off from Philly and gone straight down to Mexico. Everyone said they were crazy. Kill, who had survived the attack at Marcello’s, let him go. He wasn’t a patched in member, so he was free to make his own choices about joining the club or not. They’d sent for his mom a year later, when the restaurant was established and doing well. Seeing as they were in the height of the tourist district in Cancun, they’d been busy right from the start. His mother, who was overjoyed to have not only her son back, but basically a daughter-in-law as well, worked as their hostess during the day. Kayla’s father hadn’t quite caught on to living a simpler, streamlined life. He visited twice a year and he supported Kayla in her dreams, even if he thought she’d lost her mind, running off with a rough biker son of a bitch. He was still doing business with Drake Cannelli, but Kayla was hopeful, in time, that her dad would come around.
“No. Uh- they aren’t tourists. I don’t think so at any rate. They said they’re friends of yours.”
Shawn stilled. An icy shiver crept up his spine, even though it was hot as hell in the kitchen. “Friends?”
“Yeah, I know. I know you don’t have any friends.” Kayla laughed, not quite understanding that friends from his past might not be the welcome, good-meaning, well-intentioned kind. “I mean, that the people from your past aren’t friends. They’re like- bad associates who did bad things. Like you used to do.”
Okay, maybe she does get it. She’d always got it. Right from the start. Most people didn’t have to go through what they went through. Most people didn’t have to spend their first weekend together battling life and death situations. As a result, it accelerated their relationship. Neither of them wanted to take a single moment for granted. What would take other people years to accomplish, took them a matter of months. They were just ready. They’d met each other at the right time. Bad timing, maybe, but definitely the right time.
“Uh- did they give a name? Who is it? What do they look like?”
“You’re wielding that knife like you expect to use it on them.”
Shawn grimaced. He wondered if Kayla knew that he kept a set of Glocks stashed at their house. But those weren’t going to do him a big-load of good here in the kitchen. He’d vowed that the days of his wearing a weapon was over, but old habits died hard. He needed something in their house, just to feel safe.
“Never bring a knife to a gun fight.”
Kayla rolled her eyes. “Glad that you never think to spare my feelings either.”
“That’s why you love me,” Shawn insisted. “Because I’ve never lied to you.”
“No, you just bend the truth a little. Or omit things.”
“Like what?”
“The guns in the closet at home. I know they’re in the shoe-box on the top shelf.”
Damn. Nothing gets past her. “You’re right. Anyway, if there are friends of mine here who walked in the front door and not the back, I’m sure they’re alright. I do have some old brothers who don’t have a reason to want to do me in.”
“I figured. If they wanted to do something bad, they would have done it.”
Shawn frowned. “Does it ever bother you? Living with me? Knowing that bad shit could walk in the door and catch up with me at any second? Does it-”
Kayla stalked quickly over to the counter. She reached up and gripped Shawn’s face in her palms. They were damp with the heat of the afternoon. The central air never could quite keep up. Even so, he leaned into her touch, cherishing it.
“Never. My dad… he’s still in that life. We all make choices. Yours brought us together. You might be completely intolerable in moments, but I love you anyway. This- this place, and you, you’re my life. Your mom and my dad, you’re all I truly have. I’m thankful. Bad past, shady friends, whatever. It’s part of the deal and you’re my deal. You’re always going to be my deal.”
Shawn had to squeeze his eyes shut for a minute. Lord. Sometimes the things Kayla said hit him right in the mushy parts of himself that weren’t quite manly. She tried to convince him they were. She’d worked hard on getting him to understand that being a man didn’t have to mean carrying a gun or riding a bike or swearing constantly. That being a man could mean having the strength and courage to deal with emotion and all that shit.
Okay, she’d never said all that shit. That was his terms for it.
The point was, she was his heart. She was everything good that was in his world. Where she was concerned, he didn’t mind the soft spots.
“Okay, the shady friends,” he said, suddenly snapping back to reality. “You seated them?”
“Yeah. Got them a drink. On the house.” Kayla winked. “Their names are Ryder and Laura. They’re dressed in plain clothes. Considering Laura looks about seven months pregnant, I also considered that a good reason for them to be basically harmless.”
Shawn breathed out a rush of air. “You could have told me that right away.”
Kayla shrugged. She grinned deviously before she spun away and winked. “Guess you’ll have to punish me later for that, won’t you?”
“Oh you can bet on it.”
Kayla rushed out of the kitchen and Shawn walked quickly after her. He spotted Ryder and Laura right away. Laura glowed with health. She was obviously over-hot, but she looked absolutely radiant. Much better than the last time Shawn had seen her, being carried out of her brother’s house, that horrible day he’d helped Ryder save her. Her eyes glistened, her skin was tanned a deep bronze and her hair had grown out. It hung in thick dark waves down her back.
Ryder looked good too. Better than Shawn had ever seen the guy look.
Probably because he was happy.
That kind of thing did wonders for a guy.
“Ryder!” Shawn extended his hand as he walked over to their table. Kayla trailed at his side, a little shy. She could greet customers all day long with confidence. She could figure out even the hardest, angriest customer or fix any problem they ran into in the restaurant, but she was much more reserved when it came to things like this. She’d nearly passed out on the spot when he’d introduced her to his mom.
Shawn slipped his hand into Kayla’s and guided her into his side. “What the hell are you doing in Cancun and how did you find us?”
Ryder just nodded. He offered a tight lipped smile. He was nursing a sweating glass of beer, while Laura had an equally sweaty glass of iced tea. “Oh, word gets around. We’re down here too. I bet you didn’t know that. Much further south though.” He was purposely vague and Shawn knew better than to press for details. “I see you got out. Finally got some sense into that thick skull and got yourself a girl and a place to call home.”
“I can say the same for you.”
Ryder’s stoic expression changed when he looked at Laura. The guy’s face lit up. He looked happy. Not menacing at all. The years living the civilian life had really been good to him.
It had been good to all of them.
“You can,” Ryder ad
mitted. “It’s been good. Hard work, but I wouldn’t trade it.” He glanced at Kayla. “This oaf treating you right?”
“Yes,” she giggled. “I have no complaints at all.” When her eyes swiveled back to Shawn’s face, he could have sworn the red in her cheeks had nothing to do with the heat.
“One day I hope I can convince my brother to come down here too,” Laura said softly, changing the subject. It was a bit of a shock to think of Drake as her brother. Not that they didn’t bear a resemblance, because they did, but because Drake was still up in Philly. It seemed like another life, another world, that they were part of.
“One day at a time,” Shawn assured her with as much compassion as he could. “Kayla’s father is actually an associate. I don’t know if you’d want me to say this, but your brother is doing well. He’s healthy. His business is thriving. He’s… well, he’s still got his head attached to his shoulders.”
Laura breathed out a sigh. “Yes. We follow his progress from a distance.” She paused, glanced around, then added in an even softer voice. “He knows where we are. He’ll tell you that he doesn’t, but he does. He could come anytime. He knows that he’s welcome.”
“We’ve given my father the same offer,” Kayla said, pitching in, suddenly less shy. She pulled out a seat opposite Laura and slipped into it. Shawn took her lead and settled across from Ryder.
“I never thought I’d wind up here, but I’m damn glad that I did. Cooking for the masses, a slave to this girl here. Couldn’t ask for better.”
Kayla elbowed him in the ribs playfully. “Stop it!” She hissed. “He’s not my slave,” she insisted. “He actually likes working in the kitchen, cutting up and prepping food all day, even though he’ll tell you that he doesn’t.”
“It’s like Ryder,” Laura giggled. “He acts like he doesn’t enjoy the work we do, helping with his brother’s shelter, but I know deep down, he really loves it.”
“That’s what I let her think,” Ryder insisted, but it was obvious that Laura was right. When they looked at each other, the love they shared practically filled up the whole damn restaurant.
Lonely Rider - The Box Set: A Motorcycle Club Romance - The Complete Series Page 88
