by Linda Warren
“Almost, but I know where she’s coming from. She cares about you.”
“I know.” She rested against him and felt the beat of his heart. A tiny movement that made her feel...loved. With Paxton, she had no fears, life was too good.
“I have an idea.” He tucked hair behind her ear. “Why don’t we eat that spaghetti and go to bed.”
Forty-five minutes later they were tucked in for the night. At four in the morning Paxton would leave for Rebel Ranch to pick up his trailer and then he would meet up with his friends for the trip to Marshall, Texas. She awoke when he crawled out of bed.
She pushed hair from her face. “Is it time?”
“Yes.” He didn’t turn on the light as he slipped into his clothes. “My bag is packed and I’m leaving for now. You’ll have to lock the door and put on the chain.”
“Kiss me goodbye first.”
“I’ll never kiss you goodbye” was his surprising answer.
“Paxton.”
“No touching. No kissing. Or I will never get out of here.”
She knew he had commitments and she wouldn’t tempt him. But it was hard not to reach for him.
“I’ll text later. It will be hard to talk on the phone with the guys around but I’ll find a way.”
“Drive carefully,” she called as he went through the door. “And good luck.” She dragged herself out of bed and went to put on the chain. A loneliness settled over her as she trailed back to her room. Snuggling beneath the covers, she reached for his pillow. His aftershave clung to it lightly, and she breathed in the scent. He was still here. She could feel him.
Paxton made her feel alive again, all woman and even beautiful at times. He loved Annie as she did. All her dreams had come true. At the back of her mind was a niggling reminder that dreams don’t come true. She was mature enough to know that, but for now she was living the fairy tale and she couldn’t make herself do anything else.
She loved him.
* * *
PAXTON MADE IT to the ranch a little after six. The light was on in the bunkhouse, so Rico was up. Paxton had already done his laundry at Remi’s. All he had to do now was get the trailer ready and load his duffel bag with his bull ropes. He was ready to hit the road as soon as his friends arrived.
The sound of the truck caught Paxton’s attention. “See you later, Rico,” he called, going out the door as Rico fixed breakfast. Paxton would eat with Cole and Dakota.
“Good luck!” Rico shouted after him.
Within minutes they were on the road again. As Paxton drove over the cattle guard, the sun rose in the east, kind of slow and lazy. It was going to be another cool March day.
It was a four-hour drive and Paxton let Cole drive for a while. Paxton was back at the wheel as they drove into Marshall and the rodeo arena.
“Barron’s gonna ride at this rodeo, too,” Cole announced.
“So is Brady and Trey Goodready,” Dakota spoke up from the backseat. “There’s another new guy named Clint Hightower. I think he’s about nineteen. Where are all these young guys coming from? And what kind of name is Goodready?”
“They say he’s good and ready all the time,” Cole said. “And he’s probably going to show us just how good and ready he is.”
There were a lot of new guys on the circuit and they were keeping pace with the older ones. They were big competition for Paxton and he had to stay focused. That was hard when all his thoughts were on Remi. He had texted her several times to keep up with what she was doing and just to talk to her. He never knew love would be like this—that it would hurt. It hurt to be away from her.
Chapter Twelve
Remi stayed busy working with Chad. Every day they went through the same routine and every day Chad pushed her just a little more. She was now able to kneel without a lot of pain. The stretches helped to loosen up her tight muscles. To be healthy again she had to keep working.
One afternoon she visited her school and the children she’d taught and enjoyed every minute of it. Next year she would have a whole new class of shining, fresh faces. Afterward she went to dinner with one of her teacher friends. They talked about Holly and Annie and Remi told her about Paxton. It was good to talk about him. She missed him. Her favorite part of the day was getting home and waiting for Paxton to call. They spent endless hours on the phone.
One night she waited and waited for his call, but it never came. Then she got a text: Open the door. It was Paxton, and she flew into his arms. Just being with him made her giddy. At 6:00 a.m. he had to leave again and she held on just a little tighter this time. The long periods of not seeing him were getting hard.
* * *
DURING THE WEEK Remi got a call from her lawyer. CPS had found a distant cousin of Holly’s who was interested in Annie. Kelly and Jim Wallace lived in Houston and Remi found it odd that Holly had never mentioned her cousin. The couple had filed for permanent custody. Remi was a nervous wreck and called Paxton.
“How is this woman related?”
“Holly’s dad had been married before and had a daughter who was twelve years older than Holly’s mother. When the half sister married, she moved away. Holly mentioned once she had an aunt in Oregon whom she’d never met. CPS did a lot of checking for relatives of Holly and Derek’s. The half sister said she was too old to raise a baby, as did her daughter. It’s the daughter of the daughter who’s interested in Annie. She’s had three miscarriages and now the couple has decided to adopt.”
“You have a much stronger connection to Annie and your health is so much better. Just say positive.”
“I’ll try. But now that Annie no longer needs medical attention the judge has ruled that she be moved into foster care temporarily until the final ruling is made. The decision will be between me and the Wallaces. The good thing is Ms. Baxter asked for visitation rights and the judge granted it. I’ll still get to see Annie, as does Kelly and her husband.”
“I’m glad. Just remember I love you and we’ll get through this.”
That was all she needed to hear to face the future.
* * *
LATER, REMI GOT a call from her grandmother. Ruger wanted to see his mother. Remi couldn’t be happier and she needed a break from everything that was happening with Annie. She quickly made arrangements with her mother to go to Horseshoe. She left a message for Paxton to let him know where she would be. Almost instantly she got a text: I’ll meet you there. Going home for a couple of days. That made the trip just perfect.
Gran had made a big lunch and they sat around waiting. It was almost twelve when Ruger showed up. He was clean-shaven and even had a new haircut. His clothes were clean, too. It was a tense moment as he looked at everyone, cautious of what to say, Remi was sure. She walked up and hugged him and said, “Welcome home.”
Her mother, unable to stay quiet any longer, hugged her son and surprisingly Ruger hugged her back. She introduced Nathan and they sat on the sofa talking like families should.
It was plain to see her brother had a lot on his mind. “Paxton Rebel’s story of Dad’s murder was different than what Uncle Ira had told me. I didn’t know who to believe so I went to the courthouse and looked up the records. What I read was everything that the Rebel boy had said.” He turned to look at his mother. “Why would Dad try to kill two little boys?”
Ava rubbed her son’s back. Remi knew it was a gesture to remind him of all the beatings he’d had at the hands of his father.
“A lot of people in Horseshoe asked the same question. But they knew the answer, as I did, and Kate and John Rebel did, too.”
Remi sat up a little straighter in her chair. Her mother had never spoken about the reason Ezra McCray had shot Jude and Phoenix and she was very curious.
“Why?” Ruger asked.
“Your father was obsessed with Kate. She moved to Hors
eshoe her senior year and she was new and all the boys were eager to meet her. Ezra was one of them. He asked her out time and time again and she always refused. He became infatuated with her and followed her everywhere, even changing his school schedule to fit hers. He basically harassed her until her mother contacted the sheriff. He couldn’t do much but I think Ezra let up on following her after the sheriff had talked to him. But it escalated again when Kate started dating John. They got into a fight and John bloodied Ezra’s nose. Ezra threatened to kill him if he ever went near Kate again. Of course, John didn’t listen. They got married right out of high school and Ezra became maniacal, wanting to get even.”
Her mother glanced down at her hands, which were clasped tightly in her lap. No one moved or said a word as they waited for her to start talking again. “Sadly, his way to get even was to marry someone else. Even sadder was he chose a stupid girl who was so gullible that she believed every word he said. We would build a big house and travel and I would have everything I ever wanted. I was eager to get away from home so I married him.”
Gran made a disgusting sound in her throat, but Remi’s attention was on her mother.
Ava wiped away a tear, and Remi got up and went to sit beside her. “It was hell from the very first day. I wanted to leave, but Ezra threatened to kill me if I ever left him. He wasn’t over Kate. He kept pictures of her in a drawer. And when Kate and John’s sons were born, he became even crazier. He met John in town one day. I was sitting in the truck and heard every word. He said if any of those little bastards ever crossed over onto McCray property he would kill them. He meant every word. He was just waiting for them to cross the line. When I heard what had happened and that Ezra was dead, I didn’t feel any sadness or grief. I felt relief. And...” Her mother buried her face in her hands and began to cry.
Remi put her arms around her mother. “Please don’t. No one blames you.”
Her dad came over and knelt at Ava’s feet. “Honey, it’s over. Like Remi said, no one blames you.”
“But I lost my son. No one knows how that feels.”
“I’m sorry, Mom.” Ruger hugged his mother. “I’m sorry.”
Gran got to her feet. “Enough with all these tears. Let’s bury the past for good. We’re back together and we’re going to stay that way.” She marched toward the kitchen. “I have chicken and dressing and all the trimmings so let’s dive in. I want to see some smiles.”
They had a nice meal, and although they would never be a normal family, at least they were a family. They could build on that. As Remi ate, she thought about her mother’s story and she wondered if Paxton knew Ezra McCray had been in love with his mother. She had to wipe it from her mind, but it kept springing up at the oddest of times, especially when Paxton arrived later.
After supper, she and Paxton sat on the swing. Gran was asleep in her chair and her parents and Ruger had left a long time ago.
“You’re quiet tonight,” Paxton said with his arm around her. “Are you worried about the hearing?”
She snuggled into him. “A little. It’s just been a long day.”
“But you said everything went really well.”
“It did.” She smiled at him. Nothing was going to ruin her time with Paxton. “After Gran goes to bed, we can sneak into my bedroom like teenagers.”
He kissed her deeply, and she moaned, enjoying being back with him. How she wished life could stay this way.
“Did you give Annie a kiss from me?”
“Of course I did.” She snuggled against him. “When I kiss her now, she puts her face against mine as if she’s trying to kiss me back. She’s doing so many new things.”
“Did you meet the cousin?”
“Yes, briefly at the temporary hearing. She seemed nice, but nervous. My lawyer said I still have a better chance since she and Holly weren’t close.”
“And the permanent custody hearing will take a couple of months?”
She looked up at him. “Yes, and I’m looking at it as a good thing. It gives me more time to get healthy. As I told you on the phone, I can stand up from the floor by myself, but I can’t with anything in my arms. Chad and I are still working on that and he feels confident that I will be able to do it eventually. And I’ve gained five more pounds.”
“Whoa, that’s—”
Lights from a truck crossing the cattle guard flashed on them. “Who could that be?” Remi asked. As the truck drove into the front yard, Remi could see it was Ruger. “Wonder why he’s come back?”
Paxton shrugged and they got to their feet as Ruger came up the steps. He had something in his hand and held it out to Remi. “Mom mentioned the diamond necklace Gran and Pa had given her for graduation today. She said she couldn’t find it when she left. I found it.” He held it up. “I thought she might want it back.”
“Oh, Ruger. That’s so sweet. She said she loved that necklace. It was the first diamond she ever had. I’ll make sure she gets it, or why don’t you wait until she comes to Horseshoe again and you can give it to her yourself?”
Ruger shook his head. “I don’t know. It will probably make her cry and I don’t like it when she cries. I’d rather you gave it to her.”
“Okay.” Remi took the necklace. Ruger was still resisting, but he was coming more and more to Gran’s so that had to mean something. And the fact that he had looked for the necklace meant a whole lot more.
Ruger eyed Paxton. “Why didn’t you tell me my father was in love with your mother?”
No! No! No! Remi didn’t know what to do, but she knew this was bad for Paxton to hear it this way. But maybe he already knew...
“Everybody in town knows the story, Ruger. You need to start listening to someone other than your uncle Ira. Talk to some of the older people who were around at that time.”
“I don’t like to talk to people.”
“Then you’ll never know the truth.”
“I’ll see y’all later.” Ruger went down the steps without another word.
Remi stroked Paxton’s chest. “So you knew about my father and your mother?”
“Everyone does, Remi. He made my parents’ lives miserable.”
“But yet, you love his daughter.”
He smiled into her eyes and everything was much brighter. “Yes, ma’am.”
She stroked his face. “I’m so tired of all the bitterness and hatred between the Rebels and McCrays. I just want it to end. And I don’t want it to affect our relationship.”
“Me, neither,” Paxton said.
She kissed his cold lips. “We won’t let it.” His hand slid beneath her T-shirt to cup her breast, and desire uncurled in her stomach. “Let’s sneak into the house.”
He laughed that deep sound she loved and everything melted away but him and their feelings. The way it should be.
* * *
IN LATE APRIL, Remi was excited out of her mind when Paxton told her he was coming back to Texas to rodeo and he would have time to visit her and Annie. It had been so long since she’d seen him, so she decided to make the trip to Longview, Texas, to watch Paxton ride.
It was a little disconcerting to sit in the stands and watch all the girls shouting, “Paxton!” Some of them even had T-shirts with his name on them. They were screaming and yelling, standing on their feet, especially when he rode. Remi stood, too, with her heart in her throat. The bull seemed so big and dangerous yet Paxton was steadfast. She clapped like all the others when he made the ride.
She hurried to meet him near the loading chutes. Her balance was so much better and she was walking without the cane. Her strength was better, too, as was her state of mind. The scent of manure, animals and sweat assaulted her senses, but she kept walking.
When Paxton saw her, he immediately came toward her and gathered her into his arms. She rested against him as if she needed him to bre
athe. He took her hand and led her through the starry night to his trailer.
She stepped inside and looked around. “So this is it? This is where you live on the road?”
He bowed from the waist in a mock gesture. “Yes, ma’am.” He pointed toward a bed. “And that’s where we’ll sleep.”
“What about your friends?”
“I told them to find someplace else to sleep tonight. Anyway, they’ll be out partying. And we’ll be alone.” As he talked, he walked slowly toward her until he was standing next to her, touching her body. He swung her into his arms and carried her to the bed and she got lost in the magic of being with him again.
They spent the morning together and she met his friends, Cole and Dakota. Cole was lean with brown hair and brown eyes while Dakota was muscled with dark hair and blue eyes. They kidded and teased her about Paxton and told stories that raised her eyebrows. She liked Paxton’s friends. She left after lunch and it was another sad parting.
Back in Houston, it was the same old routine of therapy and visiting Annie. One evening in May she got a call from Ms. Baxter. It had to be news about the hearing. It was.
“I just wanted to let you know Hazel Connors from CPS called and she said the judge is making the decision on Annie in the next couple of days.” She gave Remi the date, time and where to go. “Please don’t be late. The judge’s docket is full and if we miss our time, it will be rescheduled.”
“I won’t. Thank you.”
“Remi, I want you to be prepared either way.” They talked for a minute more and Remi clicked off. She sank to the sofa. Either way. No, there was only one way. She’d waited months for this and had even gotten another medical report in, hoping that would help the judge to make the right decision. She just had to wait.
First, she had to call Paxton.
Chapter Thirteen
It was the last night of a rodeo in Helotes, Texas. Weary to the bone, Paxton grabbed his duffel bag and headed for the trailer. Cole and Dakota were talking to some girls. They were supposed to leave early in the morning for Oklahoma and he hoped they weren’t going to pull an all-nighter. He didn’t plan on driving the whole distance.
