Randy decides now is a good time to come to my defense, and his own. “I think there’s been a misunderstand—”
Before he finishes the sentence, Sunny throws open the trailer door. She must not realize how close I am; the steel frame hits me in the face, the sharp edge bashing into my forehead.
“Oh God!”
“Alex, don’t!” Lily yells.
I don’t have a chance to recover before Waters’ fist slams into my face.
There’s a crunch inside my head. Pain explodes, turning my vision white.
“Alex! What’s wrong with you?” That’s Violet screaming.
“You didn’t need to punch him in the face! He’s already hurt!” Lily yells.
I don’t know why the hit is unexpected. Waters has been dying to get me back for breaking his nose when he screwed Violet over. I fall backward, like a cut tree. Pines and birch rise around me, blue sky broken by fluffy white clouds. My head hits the gravel. The sun is a bright ball in the middle of it all. It expands, filling up the blue and eclipsing the clouds until it’s everywhere.
I blink and the clouds are gone. There’s just white and a spot of black in the center. I try to sit up, but I can’t. I have a feeling that was a hard hit.
I hear screaming. Girl screaming.
“What happened to using words?” Violet’s yelling again.
“Baby, calm down. He’s fine.”
“He’s not fine! You knocked him out!”
A disembodied hand appears in my vision. I think it’s mine. I swipe across my face. My palm comes back wet. Pain radiates through my skull in more than one location, multiplying the black spots in my vision. White turns to red as I bring my hand up in front of my eyes. Those black spots take up more room.
Gravel digs into the back of my head, and there’s a huge rock under my right shoulder. I want to move, but I’ve had the wind knocked out of me. I might even be concussed.
Sunny’s voice permeates the fog. “Oh my God! He’s bleeding!”
I want to tell someone to make sure she doesn’t come near me; Sunny and blood aren’t a great combination.
“Sunny, you should sit down,” Lily says. She must know what happens when Sunny sees blood.
“Catch her!” That’s Randy. He’s a good friend, watching out for my girl.
I should be the one to do that. I struggle to sit up, but Alex moves fast, getting to her before she hits the ground.
A shot of cold has me sitting up in a rush. It’s Bushman, with a bottle of soda. Asshole. Jesus, Waters hits hard. Bushman empties the rest of the soda on my face.
“Keep it up, Bushman, and I’ll shove that bottle up your dick hole!” Randy yells.
With Waters as his bodyguard, the little fucker has grown a set of balls. He sprinkles the last few drops on the ground next to me and backs away.
“Get her in the trailer,” Waters orders.
Bushman struggles to pull an unconscious Sunny up the two steps into the vehicle. Once she’s mostly inside, Lily pushes him out of the way and drops down beside her. I try to stand, but I’m way off balance. Waters is definitely going to gloat about this. I manage to get to my feet as Bushman turns over the engine.
Randy hands me a shirt to wipe my face with. It’s sticky from the soda. And bloody from one of my face wounds.
I take a stumbling step towards the trailer. “You can’t send Sunny home with him.”
Waters puts a hand on my chest and pushes. I drop back to the ground on my ass.
“Enough, Alex!” Violet gets between us. It reminds me of what she did in the locker room after I discovered Waters banging her there—except that time she was defending Alex, not me. “Do you realize what a hypocrite you’re being? I don’t even like you right now!”
“He’s been fucking my sister around for months!” Alex shouts back.
She throws her hands in the air. “No, he hasn’t!”
“Get over your goddamn ego, Waters,” I shout from the ground. “If you yell at Violet again, I’m gonna beat your ass.”
“You can’t even stand up right now, Butterson.”
“Alex! Just stop!” Violet seems as pissed as he is.
Commotion inside the trailer stops the yelling match, which is good, because it’s making my headache worse. Sunny opens the door again, more cautiously this time. Lily is right behind her, looking likes she’s prepared for fainting, round two. Sunny elbows Bushman out of the way and holds on to the door frame, still unsteady.
Looking at her makes me feel like shit. The only emotion on her face is resignation.
Lily puts a hand on her shoulder, looking past us to Randy, behind me. “Sunny, maybe—”
She shakes her off. “Alex, let’s just go.”
“Are you serious with this? Come on, Sunny. What is even going on right now?”
Her gaze swings slowly to me. “There’s too much drama, Miller. We can talk about this later, when everyone’s calmed down.”
“Later?” I gesture to the trailer. “You’re leaving. What kind of later is there?”
“I’ll call you tonight.”
“What’s the damn point? You’re gonna keep listening to whatever everyone tells you. All I asked was that you have a little fucking faith that I’m gonna do the right thing, and what happens? Your brother shows up and gets his dick all tied in a knot over some pictures he doesn’t like, and you decide you’re gonna go home with this fucking joker?”
“It’s not like that, Miller. Alex is worried.”
I turn to Alex. “I’m not with Sunny to get back at you, you self-absorbed fuck.” I hold a hand out to her. “Come on, sweets, come out. I’ll take you back to Guelph if that’s where you want to go. Let’s just have a conversation.”
“Miller, I—”
Her hesitation is my tipping point. It’s a kick in the balls I don’t need. “You know what? Forget it. Go back to Guelph with Tiny Dick and the gaping asshole.” I look to Waters. “You win. Congratulations. I hope you’re fucking happy.”
Sunny steps down from the trailer. “Miller, wait.”
“For what, Sunny? For you to finally believe I’m not fucking you over? I can’t do this anymore. It’s like being a goddamn hamster on a wheel. Stay or go, Sunny. Do whatever you want. Either way, I’m outta here.”
I drop the shirt from my forehead to check if the bleeding has stopped. Sunny faints again, and Lily catches her, just barely. I want to do something other than say fuck it, but it’s useless. I can’t make Sunny trust me, I can’t change my job and the craziness that surrounds it, and I can’t make Waters less of an interfering asshole.
I head for the back of the trailer, then remember it’s Waters’ car, not mine, parked behind it. They’re all blocking me in, making an exit impossible. I want to spin my tires and spray some gravel, maybe do a few fishtails and drive some of my anger out.
“We’ll all be out of your way in a minute.” Waters looks way too pleased right now.
“I’ll be inside, packing up my shit.”
“Stay the fuck out of my cottage,” he says.
I give him a WTF look. “Really, man?”
“Alex, you’re being a complete jerkoff,” Violet says. “You can go in the cottage, Buck.”
“Forget it. I’ll wait in the car until the jerkoff leaves.”
I climb into the rental and lock all the doors, glad the windows are tinted. I grab a ball cap from the backseat and pull it low, gritting my teeth when it hits the cut on my forehead. I check the rearview mirror. Randy’s holding the trailer door open. I assume he’s talking to Lily, or trying to. There’s so much shit going down, I can’t imagine it’s a very productive conversation.
Vi and Waters have a hand-flailing argument in front of the trailer. When Waters goes to hug her, she puts her hands on his chest, fending him off.
He pulls her close anyway, her hands trapped between them. When he tries to kiss her, she gives him her cheek. I don’t want to feel responsible for their argument, but I do. He t
akes her hands in his and clasps them behind his neck. Then he tilts her chin up. I’m an interloper on their private moment. His expression is earnest as he close-talks, their noses almost touching. Eventually Violet lets him kiss her, but she’s still stiff.
She shoves her hands in the pockets of her shorts while she waits for Waters to move his car. Randy steps back out of the trailer with a grim expression. He shakes his head as Bushman does a seventeen-point turn, clearly incapable of backing out. Waters jumps in the trailer before it takes off down the driveway.
Rain clouds roll in, blocking out the sun. My chest feels like someone punched a hole in it as the trailer disappears around the corner with my Sunshine.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
FIX IT IF YOU BROKE IT
I could get out of the car now, but I don’t. I sit there, staring through the rearview mirror at the empty space where the trailer was a minute ago. I don’t know if I wish I could take back the words or change the outcome of the whole situation.
Violet knocks on the window, looking stoic. Since the car isn’t running, I can’t roll down the window. I have to open the door instead.
“I’m sorry, Buck.”
I tear my gaze away from the rearview mirror. Sunny isn’t coming back. I know that. “What for?”
“This whole clusterfuck.” She looks so sad. It’s an echo of what’s going on inside me. “Why don’t you come out so I can take a look at your head?”
It takes a lot of effort to get out of the seat. My face hurts, and I’m dizzy. “I was trying to do a good thing with that fundraiser.”
“We didn’t know it was going to be like that,” Randy says from behind her.
“Balls, you mind giving us a few minutes? Maybe you should get your bag together. Clean up all your used condoms and such.” She doesn’t even thrust once.
His head drops, and he rubs the back of his neck. “Sure thing, Vi.” His shoes crunch on the gravel drive as he retreats. The screen door slams shut. A bird twitters somewhere above, and a squirrel makes that weird clicking sound. Fuck the happy sounds of nature.
Vi’s angry. And emotional. She’s on the verge of tears. I’ve witnessed a lot of girl crying lately. I don’t like that I seem to be the cause of it so often. My apology is reflexive. “I’m sorry.”
“Why? You don’t have anything to be sorry for. Well, maybe you can be sorry for the poison ivy on Sunny’s boobs, but even that wasn’t your fault. It’s not like you forced her to get naked in a forest at hard-on point.”
“Uh, no. She took her top off all by herself.”
Vi nods and keeps her hand close to my elbow as we walk over to the deck. I don’t know what she thinks she’s going to do if I drop. It’s not like she can catch me. I weigh twice as much as she does.
I sit on the edge of the deck and let her inspect my forehead. “You’re going to need a few stitches, and I think your nose is probably broken.”
“I figured as much.”
“I have to take you to the hospital.”
“I know.” I rest my elbows on my knees and press the heels of my hands against my temples, hoping to alleviate the throb. “This isn’t how I thought today would go.”
“That makes two of us.”
“Are you and Waters okay?”
Vi shrugs. “We’ll work it out. Eventually. But Boobgate is in full effect right now. I’m not happy about the way he dealt with this.”
I don’t ask what Boobgate is. I’m pretty sure I know. “The models weren’t topless, even though they looked like they were. We tried to get in and out of there as fast as we could, but it took way long, and now everything’s fucked.”
“It definitely didn’t look good, that’s for sure.”
“We would’ve left if we could.”
“I know that, Buck.” Vi pulls up an image on her phone of what looks like me being kissed by a topless model while another one rubs her boobs on Randy’s arm. “This is what everyone saw today. You left Sunny here with Lily, who’s still on the fence about you, and went to that fundraiser with Balls. Who, incidentally, can’t seem to keep a handle on his dick anywhere he goes.”
“Sunny warned Lily. I talked to her about it.”
“You should’ve warned Lily, and you should’ve told Balls to keep his hands off. Anyway, Balls and Lily are the least of your worries right now. They can sort out their own shit, or not. The fundraiser wasn’t mandatory. You could’ve skipped it. Your girlfriend being covered in poison ivy is a legitimate reason to miss a porno car wash.”
“It was supposed to be a good thing, and I wanted to talk to the guy who runs it. I didn’t know it was something I should avoid until I got there, and by that time it was too late. Sunny and I even talked about how there’d probably be pictures. I knew she wouldn’t be happy about them, but I didn’t think it’d go like this.”
Violet runs her hand over her face. “I hate the way this went down. Alex better keep Kale away from her. That dick-knob seems like the kind of guy to take advantage of how vulnerable she is right now.”
I lift my head to see if she’s serious. “You don’t think she’ll get back with him, do you?”
“I don’t know, Buck. I sure hope not. I get that you’re upset about the situation, but everyone was heated, and I’m not sure anyone was making good decisions.” She kicks at the gravel. “Sunny wasn’t wrong about letting people calm down. It would’ve been better if you could have talked to her, but Alex wasn’t going to let that happen, and she knew it. She was trying not to make the problem worse.”
“Why the fuck does Waters’ opinion matter to her so damn much?” I hate how difficult he’s made things.
“He’s her brother. He sees you hanging out with these guys who don’t seem to care whose reputation gets dragged through the mud. Then he gets to the cottage and finds her covered in poison ivy while you’re at some fundraiser that looks like a setup for a porno.”
“He knows how things can be taken out of context.”
“He sure does. But you saw what I went through when Alex publicly denied being with me on national TV. You even broke his nose over it. Yet you still seem to be okay with Sunny looking like one of your bunnies while you go out and party it up.”
“But I wasn’t—”
“I know. You weren’t partying it up, but that’s what it looks like. I believe you because I know you better than that. Alex is going to take some work.”
“All I want to do is get the fundraiser stuff going. It just backfired on me.”
“It sure did.” Her phone beeps. She pulls it out. A picture of her and Waters—taken before they even started dating, with her tongue in his mouth—fills the screen. She shoves it back in her pocket.
“Aren’t you going to check that?”
“I will in a few minutes. He can wait.”
I’m not sure if me being a priority over Waters is a good thing. “Can I ask you something?”
Vi rests her cheek on her knee. “Sure.”
“Why’d you get back together with Alex after the relationship denial?”
“You mean aside from the fact that he has a giant cock and can make me come like a freight train on nitrous?”
“Don’t be an asshole right now, Vi.”
She sighs. “It’s complicated. I love him even though he hurt me. I wanted to hate him for saying we weren’t together in such a public venue, but I couldn’t. People make bad decisions, especially when they’re under a lot of pressure. Some are worse than others. He knows he fucked up hardcore, and I didn’t sugar-coat how badly. I also don’t pretend to be over it.”
“You mean still?”
“I have moments of insecurity. He’s good about it.” She spins her engagement ring around so the diamond is facing her palm. “What I have with Alex, it’s all-consuming when I’m with him, and when I’m not. And it’s rare. It’s not perfect, but we work, and that makes it worth fighting for.”
“I thought maybe I’d have that with Sunny. I guess not.” I saw
how hard it was on Vi when Waters screwed her over. She bawled her eyes out over that asshole for weeks. And then just like that, they were back together. I’m angry at Sunny for not having faith in me, and for letting other people affect her decisions. But I still hope she doesn’t get back with Patchy McBushman Tiny Dick.
“You had an argument, Miller. That doesn’t mean it’s over.”
“I’m pretty sure I broke up with her.”
“It doesn’t have to be the end. I’m mad at Alex right now for being an asshole to you. I won’t be mad at him forever, but I’m going to let it ruminate for a while. It’s why he’s going back to Guelph with Sunny, and I’m here with you.”
“We fucked up a vacation for you, didn’t we?”
“Alex fucked it up by overreacting. I swear he could have a second career on the stage if he wanted. We can come back up once we get things sorted out. Sunny was willing to talk. I’m sure she still is. I think what it comes down to is deciding whether she’s worth the effort. Relationships take a lot of energy. I get that you want her to trust you, but you have to give her some time. One conversation about it isn’t a magic recipe for perfection. Loving someone is a lot of work, Buck.”
“Maybe I’m no good at relationships.” I don’t want to be doomed to a life of bunnies and no substance. They’re not what I want. I want someone consistent. But caring that much about someone gives them a lot of power, and that makes me nervous. Power hurts people. Then I admit the thing that’s been gnawing at me ever since I went to visit Sunny in Guelph and we finally sealed the deal: “I think I might have fallen in love with her.”
“Then you need to talk to her, Buck.”
“I need some time to think first.” I wipe away a trail of blood from the bridge of my nose. “I wish there was a drive thru for relationship problem-solving.”
Vi laughs, but it’s humorless. “Don’t we all.” She stands up and wipes the dirt off the back of her shorts. “Come on. Let’s see how Balls is doing. Then we need to get you to the hospital. You probably have a concussion, and I won’t be able to forgive Alex if anything happens to you. Then my whole future’s fucked, and I’ll have the moops for the next year, and I’ll probably start dating Balls because I’ll have to break off the engagement.”
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