Tears stung her eyes. “What you’d be getting is a used woman with a big mouth and a bad temper.”
He shook his head and used his thumb to wipe her tears. “No, you’re refurbished. The Bible says we all are, and thank God for that.” He took her hand in his. She let him, but refused to squeeze it like he did hers. “I messed up royally, Maddie. But you were able to open my eyes where so many others had tried and failed. Gary and I had a long talk, and you’re right. I was withholding grace and trying to act like God. I think I just wanted someone to blame, and he was convenient.”
She permitted one side of her mouth to curl into a partial smile. “I’m glad you figured it out.”
He leaned closer, his gaze roaming her face as if he were studying her, his lips but an inch away. His hot breath against her face made her shiver. “I want to kiss you again, Maddie. For real this time.”
It’d only take a small shift of her body to show him her heart. Her body, her soul, her heart longed to just throw the past out the window and give in to this beautiful present Reuben offered. Her stomach churned, her pulse raced. But her head screamed stop.
What if he hurt her again? He’d crushed her before not with his fists, but with his words. She wasn’t sure she could handle it again. She looked out again over the fairway. “Aren’t the lights beautiful from up here?”
“Can I ask a question?”
No. “Okay.”
“Why are you afraid to kiss me?”
She lifted her chin and swallowed the pain of her lie. “I’m not afraid. I just don’t want to.”
“That’s not why, and we both know it.”
Her heart slammed against her rib cage. If she were on land, she would run. But being up here, her feelings were harder to stuff away, no matter how much she wanted to.
He leaned closer, his mouth dangerously close again. “Maybe a better question is, do you like kissing me?”
She blinked away the tears that threatened to drop. “It has nothing to do with like or not like.”
He withdrew. His voice went from husky to low and serious. “What is it, Maddie? I want to help.”
She turned to gaze out again, and found herself snuggled closer to Reuben. “The last time a guy kissed me, before you, it wasn’t pleasant.”
“What happened?”
She’d never talked to anyone about that night. For some reason, her heart ached to unload. Maybe a by-product of the altitude. “Let’s just say Ryan wasn’t very gentle.”
“You mentioned him before.”
She closed her eyes, the picture of him imprinted in her brain. “He was into some bad stuff, but his muscles were big, his talk was tough, and I thought he hung the moon. He made me his girl, and let everyone know it. My social status went through the roof. Like everyone respected me overnight because I dated him.” The memories tugged at her. The euphoric feeling as she walked down the hall, people standing straighter as she passed, smiles directed at her instead of sneers of disdain. Every girl’s high school dream.
It didn’t take long for the dream to be smashed as sure as a pumpkin after Halloween. “Ryan didn’t do things halfway. The first times we …” She blushed at what she’d been about to say. “I mean, he wasn’t mean at first. I was so proud, because with everyone else, he acted like a gruff, tough guy, but with me, he was gentle and sweet. I told myself I brought out the good in him. But right about the time I started thinking the L word, he started to get rough. I didn’t like it, but he got mad when I told him so.
“Then one day, in school, he pulled me aside and started kissing me, right there in front of everyone. At first I didn’t care, but then people started laughing, so I pushed him away. Big mistake. Right there, with everyone watching, he started in on me. He slammed me into the locker and kissed me, then slapped me and started punching. It took a few minutes for a teacher to come out and stop him.”
Reuben tightened his arm around her, his hand rubbing gently. “I’m sorry, Maddie. That guy was a big jerk.”
“My own fault. I should have known. The good thing was, after that I decided men weren’t worth the trouble. If I was going to make a life, I’d do it by myself.”
“Even God?”
“Except for God. He’s the man I’d been looking for. He’s all I need.” Just saying the words reminded her of her mission. God, Maddie, and Kyle. They could do it, without the help of anyone else.
Reuben’s thumb rubbed a circle on her arm. “What if God wants to use a guy to help you?”
“What if He doesn’t?”
“But what if He does, Maddie? God uses all sorts of people. His will is perfect, so if His will is to give you a helpmate in life, don’t tell him no. You’ll regret it.”
The air had gotten too thick up here. She elbowed him to lighten the load. “You’re just saying that so you can get a kiss.”
His chest shook with laughter. “I won’t lie. I want a kiss. But I’m saying that because I care for you, and I know that telling God no isn’t a great idea. Believe me. I learned that the hard way.”
“You have firsthand experience in that?”
“A topic for another time.” He turned her face back toward him, his eyes probing hers. “I’m still waiting for my kiss.”
Before she could question her motives or talk herself out of it, Maddie unclenched her hand from the bar and covered his cheek, then leaned closer. “Okay.”
He leaned down until his lips grazed hers.
She sucked in a breath, and he leaned back and studied her eyes. “You okay?”
More than okay. She nodded and put her hand behind his neck to draw his lips to hers again, this time savoring every moment. The fear of their first kiss was gone.
Their lips mingled while she ran her fingers through his hair, his hand pressing against her back, inching her closer.
The wheel slowed and then jerked to a stop, the movement causing Maddie to break away.
The reality of what happened drifted into her clouded brain. She’d kissed him. “Reuben—”
He put a finger to her lips. “Shhh. Don’t ruin it. We’ve talked enough, we’ll save more for another day. This weekend. Friday night, just the two of us. Our first official date. Okay?”
As their bucket reached land and the attendant opened their bar, Maddie’s senses floated back to earth as well. She couldn’t do this. It would only end badly.
“Reuben, I—”
The dangerous kisser shushed her as his phone rang. He answered it as they walked down the plank. “Reuben speaking.”
Maddie glanced at him and instantly her stomach tightened.
His face wore that old familiar Reuben scowl.
“We’ll be right there.”
“What happened?”
He pulled her to him and put an arm around her shoulder. “It’s Kyle.”
38
He spray painted what?” Maddie clenched her fingernails into her palms.
“A cow, ma’am. Seems they thought it would be funny to write the words Blue Thunder on the prize winning cow over at the Ag exhibit. The owner’s none too happy.”
She bit the side of her cheek to keep from yelling. Loudly. “Oh, the sister’s none too happy either. Where is he?”
He motioned for Reuben and Maddie to follow them. Sitting inside the barn was Kyle. No accomplice had come forward, but there was no way he’d done this on his own. He didn’t even have any spray paint.
“Kyle, what on earth were you thinking?”
He stared at the floor and shrugged.
Maddie pressed her fingers to her temples. She looked at the security officer. “Can I take him home, or are charges being pressed?”
“No. The owner said as long as he’d get disciplined at home, he wouldn’t file a formal complaint.”
Well, glory be for that. “Thank you.” She turned to Kyle. “Let’s go. Now.”
He stood and followed her out of the barn, his feet dragging the whole way, Reuben on his heels.
Maddie tu
rned. “Whatever possessed you to do such a thing?”
He only shrugged.
Reuben walked around and put a hand on Kyle’s shoulder. “How about I walk you to your car?”
Maddie shook her head. Getting her head mixed up with Reuben got her into this mess. She should have never let Kyle out of her sight. “No, we’ve got it. I’ll, uh, see you around sometime.”
“That’s it?”
She glanced back to see him standing, his arms spread apart. “Kyle’s my priority. I forgot that up there for a minute.”
“Maddie, it doesn’t have to be this way. I want to help.”
“Good-bye, Reuben.”
God, please. Please, please please, let Kyle come here to stay. I need my family, and he’s the only person I have left. Even though he does spray paint cows….
Kyle walked into the living room and tossed his bag beside the couch. “I’m packed. This stinks. I don’t want to go back.”
“Your cow painting didn’t help things, you know.”
“I told you I didn’t do it. That other kid told me he wanted to show me something cool. I went with him and watched him do it. When someone started yelling, he threw down the can and ran.”
While the intelligent sister in her said he was full of bologna, a part of her actually believed him. Kyle may have an attitude, but Sarge ran a tight ship. He didn’t get out of line too often.
“It doesn’t matter who did it. You weren’t supposed to leave the group, but you did and look where it got you.”
As if on time, the doorbell chimed. “Can you get that?”
She turned back to the kitchen to finish wiping the counters and heard Reuben’s voice float through the house.
Her heart skipped a beat. What was he doing here? He probably decided to come support her while Kyle left. She wished he would just leave. It made it even harder.
She laid the rag on the sink and walked out to the living room. “What are you doing here?”
Without taking his gaze from hers, he cocked his head toward the back sliding door. “Kyle, can you give us a few minutes? Alone?”
The boy shrugged and headed outside.
Maddie lifted her eyebrows. “Corina will be here any minute.”
“I know. I came to lend moral support.”
She wiped her sweaty palms against her shorts. “I’m doing just fine as it is.”
“You know what I think?”
“That sandwiches should be America’s national food?”
He smiled. “Besides that.”
“Please, do share. Only because I don’t think you’ll leave until I let you.”
“I think you’re a rotten receiver.”
Maddie rolled her eyes. “I don’t see how football has anything to do with me. I probably would be a lousy receiver.”
He took a step toward her. “I can’t figure out if it’s your pride that keeps you from accepting help or the fear of being let down. So which one is it, Maddie?”
She turned to look for something to clean to get out of this conversation. But everything was finished. “Listen, I don’t have time for this. Corina’s going to be here any time.”
Reuben took two steps until he stood directly in front of her. “You told me once that I needed to extend grace. Well, you, my dear, were right. But you also need to accept grace and help from others. Be a graceful receiver. No one can go through life alone.”
“I have God. He’s all I need.”
“News flash, Maddie Buckner. God is in the business of using his people to do his work. So when you reject help from, say, my mom or Gary, or Allie, or me, when we’re just trying to do what God asks us to, then you’re rejecting God too.”
She backed up a step. “But—”
The ding of the doorbell saved her from having to formulate a reply.
Kyle walked in from the backyard and glanced at the pair. “You done yet? Geez, kiss and make up and be done with it already.”
“We’re not—” Reuben said the words in time with Maddie, and they both looked at each other as Kyle opened the door.
Corina stood with a smile on her face and a clipboard in her arms. “Good morning. Sorry I’m a few minutes late. Rush-hour traffic out of Chicago is a bear. Kyle, how was your weekend?”
“Awesome. I don’t want to go back.”
“You know the drill. We have a few hurdles to get through yet.”
Kyle looked back at Maddie, a glint in his eye that scared her. What was he thinking?
Maddie tore herself away from Reuben, who looked proud as a papa to be staying. “Corina, come sit. Do you want a drink?”
“No, and we don’t have long. I just wanted to talk with you, tour the place, take a few notes. And who’s this?” She nodded toward Reuben.
“This is my, uh, former boss, Reuben. I told you about him….”
“Yes you did.” She held out a hand to him. “It’s so nice to meet you. I have a few questions for you too, if you don’t mind.”
He nodded. “I’d be glad to.”
Kyle stepped in between the two. “Yeah, Reuben and Maddie have some great news.”
Maddie frowned. They did? “Kyle—”
He crossed his arms over his chest, a smile exploding on his face. The boy looked downright proud of himself. “Yep, they’re getting married. See? Now they’ll be together, I can come live with them, and everything will be cool. Right?”
39
Reuben couldn’t move. Married? What was the boy talking about?
He liked Maddie and all. Wanted to date her. But married? Maybe eventually….
The social worker raised her eyebrows. “Well, this is a new development. I guess congratulations are in order?”
He stood speechless as she held her hand out again. Dumbly, he shook it, not sure his voice would work yet.
Maddie stood a foot from him in a similar state of shock, staring in horror at her little brother. “Kyle, we aren’t—”
The boy patted her arm. “I know, you weren’t going to say anything just yet.” He turned and gave Reuben a private, pleading stare. “But don’t you see? This fixes everything. If you wait too long, the court might let the Blakelys adopt me.”
The social worker smiled, but the action didn’t reach quite to her eyes. “So when did you pop the question?”
Kyle spoke for them. “He asked her on the Ferris wheel last night at the fair.”
He did? They’d done a lot of things on the Ferris wheel, including some cold-shower-invoking kisses, but a proposal? He would’ve remembered that.
Maddie put a hand on his elbow. “Corina, can you give us a minute?”
She nodded. “Sure. I’ll just go check out your yard. This really is a nice neighborhood, Maddie.”
Kyle waved to them. “I’ll go show Corina around, okay?” The moment the door slid shut, Maddie turned to face him. “Reuben, honest, I have no idea what he’s talking about.”
No doubt about it, given the expression on her face when Kyle made his announcement. “The boy is desperate to be with his sister and saw an obvious solution. I gotta be honest, it was brilliant on his part.”
She pressed her fingertips to her eyes, something she did when trying not to cry. A classic, tough Maddie move. “I don’t know what to do. I can’t lie to her.”
He took her hand. “Then don’t.”
The door interrupted them again. Kyle and Corina stomped the grass off their feet on the door mat. “The backyard is gorgeous, Maddie, you did a …” Her voice trailed off as she caught sight of Maddie’s tears. She sent Reuben a protective you-better-not-have-hurt-her glance. “Is everything okay?”
Maddie turned and brushed her eyes with her fist. “Yes, but we need to tell you that—”
Reuben put a hand on the small of her back. “That we’d love it if you came to the wedding. We don’t have a date planned yet, but you’re more than welcome.”
Corina smiled and nodded. “I’d be delighted. Now, don’t think this makes you a shoo-in f
or custody, but it does help the odds quite a bit. Reuben, I’ll need to do some background checks on you, and there will be paperwork to fill out eventually, especially if you want joint custody.”
He nodded. “We do.”
Maddie looked up at him, her eyes wide in confusion. “We do?”
“Yes, of course we do.” He gave the social worker a wink. “She’s so deliriously in love, she keeps forgetting her own name even.” For emphasis, he pulled Maddie to him and placed a chaste kiss on her lips. “Right, love?”
Her good hand fluttered in the air and landed on his stomach. He was quite sure she didn’t even realize it. “Um, right. Yeah, in love.”
Corina laughed. “Okay, I get it. Save the mushy stuff for after we leave, please. Can I get a tour of the inside?”
Kyle grabbed her arm and took the lead. “I’ll show her, Maddie.”
As soon as they disappeared down the hall, Reuben put his arms around her and pulled her close. “I’m sorry. I had to wing it a little. But I was serious.”
“You were?” Her voice croaked hoarser than a frog.
“I think I’ve loved you since I saw your back plastered against my window.”
She snorted. “Liar.”
“Okay, maybe a little later than that.”
“I can’t lie to Corina. She’s more than just mine and Kyle’s social worker. She’s become a friend.”
He put a hand to her cheek. “Is being saddled with me for the rest of your life all that bad of a thought?”
“No, but—”
He covered her lips with his to silence her. “Then good. We’ll talk about it later. It’s not like we’ll get married right now. But if our engagement helps you get custody of Kyle, then I’d be happy to push up the formal announcement, as long as you’re okay with it.”
She looked up at him, her eyes searching his. “Are you saying you want to marry me?”
For a guy who’d dragged his feet for ten years over marrying a girl, Reuben thought it almost comical that he did, indeed, want to marry Madison Buckner, whom he’d known for all of three months. “We have a lot to learn about each other, but yes, I believe I’d love to marry to you.”
Sandwich, With a Side of Romance Page 25
