“Buy one?” he asks.
Dahlia nods her head. “Yes, at auction?”
Isaac frowns and shakes his head. “I doubt it. I’m just enjoying the company and helping where I can.”
I grunt a laugh. He doesn’t want the responsibility anymore. He’s missing out, and he knows it. But I can’t blame him when I did the same thing.
At least I didn’t come here though.
“Oh, how do you help?” Dahlia asks with genuine curiosity.
“Shows and demonstrations.”
“Isaac is an expert with the whip.” Dahlia shifts slightly at my mention of the whip. And it forces a smirk to my lips.
As the waitress comes and gently sets our drinks down one at a time from a large silver tray, Dahlia’s phone rings. Her eyes dart to mine, and I nod slightly.
“I’m sorry.”
“Nothing to be sorry for. If I didn’t want your phone on, I would have made that clear.” I lean closer to her, cupping her chin in my hand. “I think you should be in the habit of listening for your phone though, my sweet treasure.” Her face brightens with a beautiful pink as I quickly kiss her lips and release her.
The uneasiness of the day settles against my chest as I lift my whiskey to my lips, the scent filling my lungs. I throw it back, knowing she’s not alright. We aren’t alright. This isn’t an easy fix, and I’m going to have to be slow and patient. Two things I’ve never been very good at.
I lock eyes with Isaac as Dahlia busies herself looking in her purse. Isaac’s worked in security for so long and dealt with a number of victims. I’m sure he has an opinion of my sweet treasure. He’s a good man, and he hated to tell me what happened to her. I haven’t talked to him since earlier, and I can see the questions in his eyes.
I give him an imperceptible nod. I know she’s going to be alright. I’ll make damn sure of it.
His shoulders relax slightly, and his relief is evident. I wrap my arm around Dahlia’s shoulders, consumed by the need to touch her and protect her, my desire just to have her close.
A soft noise from behind us gains Isaac’s attention.
“I’ll be right back,” he says with his eyes on the sweet little thing who just walked into the room, her hand gently settling on the bannister, bracing herself. Her eyes are large and full of shock and wonder. There’s no collar around her neck and she’s walking aimlessly in the room, searching for where she belongs. Her short jumper looks out of place, further making her stand apart from the crowd. But what captures my attention are the thin silver scars on her back. So thin, they wouldn’t be visible if not for the exact placement of the sconces in the dining hall.
I watch as Isaac approaches her and she falls slowly to the floor, never looking him in the eyes. It’s obvious she’s been trained before. But not by anyone here.
“It’s all so overwhelming,” Dahlia’s soft voice brings me back to her. My sweet treasure. She doesn’t belong here, but not because she doesn’t fit in. She does, so well. She doesn’t belong here because she should be home with me. Healing and working on feeling whole. I hate that I ever acted in a way that contributed to her pain.
No matter what she says, I did.
I took her in a way that resulted in her being in pain. It’s unacceptable. I need to make this right. But there are only weeks left.
I need more time.
“You’re coming back with me, and I want you to stay with me.” I say the words as a command although it toes the line of the freedom I’ve given her thus far into the contract. I can see her protests in her eyes, although she remains quiet. She’s thinking that I think less of her. That I think she’s broken. That I pity her. But I don’t. She’s strong and capable, just like she was yesterday. But I can offer her solace. And I want to. I desperately crave to fill those needs that she’s ignored.
“I’m your Dom. I need to fix this so you can better serve me.” It’s easy to make it sound selfish. I am a selfish man. And I’m pushing her. But that’s what I’m supposed to do. My role is to push her to her limits. She can handle this. She’s strong enough.
She hesitates and looks around the dining hall, as if only now realizing where we are. Her beautiful eyes raise to meet mine and she softly agrees, “Yes, sir.”
Chapter 20
Dahlia
I’m your Dom. I need to fix this so you can better serve me.
Sitting at my desk at work, I mindlessly finger the necklace, a gift from Lucian, at my throat. I have emails piling up that I need to respond to, but I can’t get my mind off my current dilemma; I think I’m falling for Lucian. I know I shouldn’t be, given our complicated pasts, but I feel like he’s the first person to ever truly understand me. I’m still in shock that he didn’t call off our contract after learning my secret. Or that he didn’t shy away from my claims of being broken. It seemed to only make him more determined to help me.
I can’t believe that he’s willing to take on my emotional baggage when he can just walk away and find himself another Sub who doesn’t have the same hang-ups. He doesn’t have to waste his time with me, he can have any woman he wants. But it shows that he cares. And I want his help. I need his help. Even if it makes me seem weak. I don’t care.
Still, I’m worried that I’m setting myself up for disappointment. I can feel myself being weak for him. I’m relying on him, and that’s something I don’t do. I feel there’s a good chance Lucian won’t be able to help me and I’ll end up with an aching heart. To add to my insecurities, last night definitely gave me doubts about our future.
I suck in a heavy breath at the memory.
I’d tried to give Lucian a blowjob when it was time for bed, but he claimed he was tired and needed to sleep. He gently brushed my hair away from my face and told me to lie down. I did as I was told, but I hated it. I wanted to accept him at his word, but I couldn’t stop thinking he just didn’t want me because of my problem. Because I’m broken. It took a lot for me to hold myself together and my self-esteem took a blow. I started to think I wasn’t good enough. That he thought I wasn’t good enough for him. And that he’s only trying to help me because he pities me.
I can only hope that it’s all in my head.
Breaking out of my dark thoughts, I let out a soft sigh of frustration as I look at the tons of emails on my computer screen. I’m never gonna get any work done.
Trying to push my situation from my mind, I begin to go about answering emails, starting with the most important ones first. By midday I’m halfway through my workload and I’ve taken a break to type a message to my therapist when Carla nearly breaks her neck bursting into my office. She's holding a newspaper clutched to her chest, her expression animated and excited. As usual, she’s dressed stylishly today in a black pantsuit and cream camisole peeking out from underneath, her hair pulled back into a single braid, bangs covering her forehead, rosy rouge coloring her cheeks and purple shadow frosting her eyelids.
She shakes the paper at me, her chest heaving violently, making me think she’s sprinted all the way up to my office without pausing to take a breath. “You will not believe what’s on the front page of the Daily Observer!” she gasps.
My curiosity piqued, I quickly close out the email that I was typing to my therapist about making an appointment so that Carla doesn’t see. I don’t need her thinking I’m broken, too.
“What’s that?” I ask, standing up to take the paper from Carla. I’m trying to be my normal self, but I just don’t have the peppy outlook I usually do. I’m tired, and my spirits are dampened.
“Just look at it!” wheezes Carla.
I snatch the paper from her hands and flip it around to the first page. A jolt of shock runs through me as my gaze settles on the page and I let out a soft gasp, my eyes going wide. The headline in bold takes my breath away.
Hot, Eligible CEO Bachelor’s new fling!
It’s a picture of me and Lucian on the night we had dinner at the restaurant, embracing and engaged in a heated kiss. Lucian’s hand is on
my ass, and my arms are wrapped around his neck. My heart pounds. I know right when it was taken. I remember that moment like it happened only a minute ago.
“Crazy, huh?” Carla breathes next to my ear as she looks at the picture with me, causing me to jump. I was so engrossed with the picture that I forgot that she was even there. “Where the hell were you two at?”
I’m unable to respond, my eyes glued to the picture. A surge of powerful emotion runs through me. I can’t get over how much we look like a couple. Even though it was all supposed to be for show it almost looks... real. Like we really are in love.
My heart does a flip at the thought and I go weak in the knees, confirming what I felt earlier; I’m falling for Lucian. It scares the hell out of me. This, what we have, is fragile. It all hinges upon the fact he wants to fix me. But what happens when he decides I’m not worth the trouble? Or when my contract is up in nine days? My lips draw down into a frown as emotion threatens to overwhelm me.
And what will Lucian think about this? My blood spikes with anxiety. I can’t even begin to think of his reaction. I try to swallow, but it feels like my heart is shoved up my throat and trying to get away from me.
Carla stares at me, noticing my conflicted expression. “What’s wrong?” she asks me, placing her hand on my arm with concern. “Why aren’t you happy?”
I set the paper down on my desk and turn to her, parting my lips to say something, but then feel a lump the size of a golf ball fill my throat, staying my words. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I just want this to be as real as this picture looks. I want that more than anything.
“Dah?” Carla says, coming in closer. “Is something wrong? Did Lucian do something to you?”
“No,” I say, my voice thick with emotion. “Not at all.” It would be far easier to just tell her my dilemma and not have her guessing at what’s wrong, but I can’t bring myself to do it. I don’t want to risk telling her and being crushed that she doesn’t understand.
Carla places both her hands on my shoulders and gazes into my eyes. “What is it then, huh? You can tell me.”
No I can’t.
The lump is growing bigger. And I don’t know why. Everything is happening so fast, and I don’t know what to do. Just days ago, I was happy to have finally found someone who could get me off, but now he knows my secret and I think I’m falling for him. Fuck.
Tears well up into my eyes, and I feel like any moment I’m gonna start choking on them.
Seeing the anguish on my face, Carla pulls me into a tight embrace. “C’mere, girl.” She begins patting on my back, not knowing she’s making things worse. “Whatever’s the matter, it’s going to be okay. I’m here for you.”
My throat constricted with emotion, I’m unable to say a word, and can only manage to think my response.
Oh Carla, if only you knew.
Chapter 21
Lucian
The minute I get into the door, I make a beeline for the playroom. I can’t wait to see her. I’m ready for training to really begin. I drop the keys on the foyer table, making a loud clinking sound, and start undressing, leaving the jacket on the floor as I make my way to the stairs. I loosen my tie and pull it off as I push open the door, revealing my treasure.
She’s still, and in the exact position she should be in. The sight of her gorgeous curves and bared pussy makes my dick that much harder. She stirs slightly when she hears me walk in. I close the door gently, but I’m not nearly as quiet as I have been.
She rights herself instantly and goes motionless.
I know exactly what to do with my treasure. I strip down to my slacks as I make my way to the dresser. It’s filled with a variety of gear and toys. I have to open three drawers before I get to the one I need. I look over my shoulder and Dahlia is perfectly still, exactly how she should be. There are a few vibrators in this drawer, in all sorts of sizes. A large wand with a round head making it resemble a microphone in its build, bullet vibrators, butt plug vibrators, an egg with a remote. There's something for every mood and whim. A rough hum comes up my throat as I take each one in.
“Good girl, treasure,” I say as I place my hands on the edge of the drawer. “How was your day?”
She answers as I keep my back to her while I debate on which one I should choose. “It went well, sir.” Her voice is so soft I can barely hear her. “And yours?”
“Speak up.”
“And yours?” she repeats herself. I settle on the wand.
“Draining and unfulfilling up until now,” I say as I shut the drawer with the wand in my right hand.
“On your back,” I give the command as I shove my pants down and kick them off beside the bed. Dahlia’s quick to turn on her back. Her breathing is coming in a little quicker now. Her eyes stare at the ceiling, and her arms lay at her side.
“Look at me,” I tell her. “I want to see you when I talk to you.”
“Yes, sir.” A trail of goosebumps runs down her front as she answers me, pebbling her pale rose nipples. It takes a lot of restraint not to suck them into my mouth. But I refrain. She needs this first.
“We’re going to work on what excites you, Dahlia. I’m going to train you and your body, condition you really. I’m going to make you desire me in any way you can have me.”
I crawl closer to her and tap on her inner thigh for her to spread her legs, which she obeys immediately.
“I want you to tell me about your fantasies, Dahlia.” Her eyes widen, and her body stiffens as I run the tips of my fingers from her clit down to her opening. She’s soaking wet. Fuck, the very sight of her makes me want to take her. I’m dying to be inside of her hot pussy, but I have to wait.
Her breathing gets heavy, and she licks her lips. “I can do that.”
I run the tip of the wand through her folds. She sucks in a breath of air from the chill of the steel. “You’re going to tell me all your fantasies, Dahlia.” I turn on the vibrator as it hits her opening. Dahlia’s eyes close, and her lips part slightly. She doesn’t move though, she knows better than to move. I slowly work it up to her clit, watching her face and her body for her reactions. I want to know exactly where that sweet spot is. Her thighs twitch, and her back arches slightly as I reach the underside of her throbbing clit. Bingo.
“But none of the ones you’re thinking.” I continue my path over and around her clit and then back down. I can see how much she’s resisting the need to writhe with pleasure. If I have to, I’ll restrain her, but I don’t think I’ll need to.
“So tell me your fantasies,” I say easily, getting comfortable in my position and knowing this may take a while.
“Any?” she asks me.
I shrug and say, “You can. You’ll see what they reward you.”
She takes in a sharp inhale as I round the sensitive spot and then she starts, “I dream about being alone at night.” Her voice is soft and husky. A blush brings color to her chest and face.
“There’s a man behind me. I can hear him, but I’m too afraid to turn around so I walk faster, but he catches me.” Her breathing comes in quicker, and her body tenses as the vibrator comes closer to where it needs to please.
“He pins me to the brick wall of an alley,” her voice goes tight with need, and her thighs tremble as I hold the wand in place.
“Who is this man?” I ask her, my dick hard with need.
“No one, a stranger, I don’t know,” she answers quickly.
She whimpers when I pull the wand away and leave her on edge. The hum fills the room as her eyes snap open and she stares at me with hurt in her eyes.
“Let’s try a different one,” I tell her. Her mouth falls open, and she swallows thickly as she realizes what I’m doing. She closes her eyes and nods.
Her throat is hoarse as she slowly says, “I… I dream about being on a date.” Her forehead is pinched, and I know she’s lying.
I pull the vibrator away and she doesn’t even look at me. “Don’t lie to me, treasure. Next time I’ll punish you.�
��
“I’m sorry,” she says weakly.
“Maybe I should tell you a story?” I offer, “and you can finish it?”
“Yes please, sir.”
“I dream about taking a beautiful girl and locking her in my office at work.” Dahlia’s eyes snap open, and she looks back at me with a questioning gaze. “She stays under the desk as I sit at my chair.”
“Do you think this could be your fantasy?” I ask her.
She nods her head, shifting slightly on the bed. I quicken the pace of the vibrator as she starts her story.
“I wait for you on my knees.” She bites down on her lip and then looks back at me. “You take your cock out as you sit down and stroke it. A bead of precum starts to drip,” her voice goes a little higher as I put the vibrator to the underside of her clit and hold it there. She struggles to stay still as she continues her story. “I lick it. You moan,” her head thrashes to the side. “So sexy when you moan like that.” I ease off the pressure and massage circles around her clit. “You love it when I take you in deep. Your hands fist in my hair.” Her breathing picks up as I put the vibrator onto her most sensitive spot. Her face scrunches, and her mouth opens wide.
“Keep going, or I’ll stop.”
Her fingers dig into the mattress as she continues. “You shove your cock down my throat. You push me up and down your dick. I can feel you all the way at the back of my throat!” Her upper body lifts off the bed as she screams out, close to her release.
My dick twitches with the need to give her what she needs, but I can’t. Not yet.
“And then I pull out of your mouth.” I continue with the story, letting her concentrate on controlling her body. Her breathing comes in harsh pants. “I pull you up, grabbing the hair at the base of your skull.”
Heartstopper Page 57
