by Galen Wolf
Tye says, ‘Not slimes then, or moulds.’
‘No.’
‘But mephits and dragons…’ I say.
‘Dragons?’ Tye whistles. ‘Instakilling dragons? Wow.’
‘And vampires,’ I say, ‘but not skeletons because they don’t need their necks intact to live.’ I drum my fingers on the oak table. ‘But it can’t be this easy. They’ve been dragging out cartloads of crystal from Carrionburg since they captured it months ago. If it was that easy their whole army would be equipped with vorpal weapons and they would have gone through us like a scythe through long grass.’
Lancelot smiles again, but there’s less humour this time. ‘No, there’s another ingredient.’ He turns suddenly to Bernard. ‘Have you got the Alchemist skill ‘Craft Unique Items?’ It’s pretty high level.’
Bernard looks offended. ‘Of course I have. Have you seen my mirrors?’
Baffled, Lancelot shakes his head. ‘No.’
‘Do you want to?’
‘Sure. I guess. Now though?’
I wave at Bernard. ‘Not now.’ then turn to Lancelot. ‘He can do the crafting. So what’s the extra ingredient?’
‘Jabberwock blood.’
‘Jabberwock blood?’
‘Yeah, you know the rhyme?’
I shake my head so Lancelot recites, ‘Beware the Jabberwock, my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!’
Bernard says, ‘Don’t know it.’
I do however. I say, ‘That’s where the phrase vorpal sword comes from, isn’t it? That’s how he killed the Jabberwock, with the vorpal sword.’
Lancelot nods. ‘One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.’
That’s the one. So with Smoky Crystals and Jabberwock blood we can put the vorpal enhancement to our weapons?’
Lancelot says, ‘Yes, plus you need a high level smith and an alchemist with the Craft Unique Items skill.’
Bernard beams at me. ‘The dream team. That’s us.’
Lancelot shifts in his seat. ‘Imagine the enemy with regiment after regiment of vorpal armed soldiers. That would be the end for us. The King would never return. They’d take Caer like they took Camelot, but more easily, then Gloucester then Glastonbury until they take London and Canterbury. The whole island will belong to them and with vorpal swords their advance will be like lightning.’
Tye’s drumming his fingers on the table. ‘So we’ve got to stop them.’
I nod. ‘But what if we had regiment after regiment of vorpal armed troops? We’d slaughter them and reclaim what’s rightfully ours, take Camelot back…’
‘It wouldn’t be Stygia anymore,’ Bernard says.
Lancelot’s eyes shine. ‘It could be done. It really could. This could give us our total victory.’
Fitheach, who had been quiet up until then says, ‘Or total defeat if they get it first.’
We all look at him. He’s right of course, but I say, ‘But I take it they don’t have the Jabberwock blood, or else they’d have done it already.’
Lancelot rubs his chin. ‘Jabberwocks are very rare beasts. Terrible, fierce fighters but thankfully rare.’
‘So that’s the end of the plan,’ Tye says, ‘if they’re rare, I mean. We can’t get the blood.’
Lancelot says. ‘I guess so. I’m just worried in case the enemy capture one.’
Fitheach is looking uncomfortable. I turn to him and raise my eyebrows, inviting him to speak. Finally he does, clearing his throat first. ‘I don’t know whether I should say this…’
‘Do,’ Tye says. ‘I always do. Whatever’s on my mind comes out of my mouth.’
‘We’ve noticed,’ Bernard mutters.
‘Well…’ Fitheach continues. ‘A great friend of mine, St Cuthbert. He lives on Lindisfarne Island. You know him?’
I shake my head. We all do. No one knows him.
‘He’s a splendid chap, really is. We go back a long way. We were young priests together. I remember the time we played that trick on old St Bede.’
‘Get on with it,’ Bernard says.
‘Yes, of course. Well, I was going to say St Cuthbert…’
‘Yeah, yeah. Your old friend who lives on Lindisfarne,’ Tye says.
I cut him a glance and he goes quiet. Fitheach continues. ‘It’s a remote place, Lindisfarne, just off the coast of Northumbria. Wild in the winter.’
‘Hasn’t it fallen to the enemy?’ Tye looks around. ‘I thought the whole coast had gone.’
Fitheach shakes his head. ‘No, it’s off the coast. An island. Joined by a causeway at low tide, but separate, and St Cuthbert is a mighty saint with lots of holy magic on his side. He’s kept them at bay.’
‘More like he’s not worth their trouble. If it’s such a piddling little place as you say,’ Bernard says.
Fitheach frowns. ‘No, Cuthbert is a formidable fighter and he has his own soldiers, The Holy Rollers.’
‘They’re really called that?’ Tye asks.
Fitheach nods.
I’m losing patience. ‘Fitheach, please. You had a point I think.’
The saintly saint smiles. ‘Yes. Well Cuthbert’s got a Jabberwock. On Lindisfarne with him.’
Tye says, ‘The ferocious killer monster? He’s got one?’
Fitheach nods. ‘Apparently. I heard he found a lair on Lindisfarne.’
Lancelot sits forward. ‘Don’t the enemy know the Jabberwock is there?’
Fitheach shakes his head vigorously. ‘I doubt it. I doubt Cuthbert would ever let the minions of Satanus on his island to look.’
‘And Lindisfarne is of no strategic importance to their push south to take on King Arthur, so they’ve probably overlooked it,’ I say.
‘Exactly!’ Lancelot says. I can tell he’s excited at the news. ‘Soon we could have our own Jabberwock. And we’ve already got the crystals.’
‘Just one problem,’ Tye says. ‘We’ve got to cross a hundred miles of enemy territory to get it.’
‘Not just one problem,’ I say, and all eyes are on me. ‘Well, it’s Cuthbert’s pet and we’re going to have to kill it to get its blood. Maybe he won’t like that.’
An Intrusion
Lancelot agrees to come with us to Lindisfarne and find the Jabberwock. The question is when do we go? We’re sitting around mulling that over when Thorvald steps in. He sees us sitting there, all player characters and goes strangely shy. He takes off his cap deferentially and says, ‘Begging your pardon, Sir Gorrow, sir, but Level 2 of the dungeon is done.’
Bernard jumps to his feet! ‘Level 2 is done! I could kiss you, Thorvald!’
The miner backs away, hand up. ‘No, Mr Bernard, sir. You needn’t be doing no kissing.’
The alchemist says, ‘It was just a matter of speech,’ then he turns excitedly to Lancelot. ‘You can come see my magic mirrors now.’
Lancelot looks questioningly at me. ‘They are quite cool,’ I say.
‘Can I come?’ Tye asks. ‘I’ve never been down to Level 2 before. You’ve never allowed me.’
Bernard looks at him coolly, as if he’s going to say no, but I say, ‘Of course you can, Tye. We’ll all go.’
Fitheach excuses himself. He’s got some praying to do, but before he goes, he assures me he will come with us to Lindisfarne. ‘I’d like to see Cuthbert again.’
I bow and he leaves, then the rest of us wander through to the Forgotten Chapel Dungeon through the mighty connecting door. As we stroll through the Tapestry Room and Lancelot sees all the fire mobs that stand untriggered placed strategically round the dungeon he nods and smiles. ‘You’ve done an amazing thing here. I’ve never run a dungeon, but I’ve been in plenty. ‘He gestures to the mouldy tapestries and the piles of broken chests and ruined armour that litter the place. ‘It looks so authentically shabby.’
I say, ‘Bernard is the dungeon dresser. Him and Oliver Stone. In
fact we’ve had a lot of help from the NPCs in this.’
‘Well, whoever did it is very talented.’
We continue through the Spooky Corridor past the alcove with the crush trap. The fire mephits cluster on the ceiling above us but don’t move. Then we go down the sloping tunnel until we get to the Gas Room. Of course the gas trap doesn’t trigger. I use the master key to open the heavy iron door and we’re through into the Room of Statues. We follow the main path deeper into the dungeon until we get to the Fire Dwarves Forges. Tye is talking busily to Lancelot, explaining the dungeon narrative and talking about the mobs and the traps. Then we get to the Royal Guardroom and the Fire Dwarf Halberdiers stand like statues. They’re quite eerie actually the way they stand like people pretending to be statues at Venice Beach. Then we get through to Tye’s sumptuous chambers. Fountains of fire play in each corner, red and yellow flames that give off no heat in their untriggered state. The ceiling is covered with a dancing film of blue fire like alcohol spirit burning. This is Tye’s personal quarters. Though he’s got a stone chamber in the Silver Drift Mine he prefers his luxury suite here. There’s a big four poster bed with cloth of gold sheets and drapes. There’s a gold leaf covered washing bowl, a dressing table with a silver mirror in a good frame where he can admire himself. We walk through to his library. There are tomes in here with various minor effects, but of course the prize is the Level Loot which is a Tome giving 150+ bonus to any stat the player chooses. Tye explains it to Lancelot.
‘That’s a prize piece of loot’, Bernard says.
‘Can I have one?’ Lancelot says, laughing.
‘No,’ Tye says, serious-faced.
‘I was joking.’
‘I wasn’t.’
Lancelot peers at the bookshelf. The loot tome is of red leather with gold tooled writing in an arcane script I can’t read. ‘Is that it?’ He says, pointing. It looks special so I guess it is. ‘May I touch it?’
‘No,’ Tye says.
Lancelot shrugs. ‘Okay.’ Then he scratches his head. ‘So can players come and loot this time after time?’
‘Maximum of 150 to each skill, so you can’t just keep adding to the same one.’ This time it’s Bernard explaining. After all, it was him who crafted the tome.
‘Yeah, but how many skills are there? I think you’re being too generous.’
Bernard shrugs. ‘We wanted to entice people.’ He turns to the wizard. ‘It’s up to Tye to kill them all first. Besides, we can downgrade the loot if it looks like we’re giving too much away. We want to be the best dungeon in Camelot. The most popular.’
I nod. ‘I guess we do.’
Lancelot says, ‘It’s an amazing front. It looks just like a real dungeon.’
Bernard says, offended but not wanting to upset the knight. ‘It is a real dungeon.’
‘Yes, I know, but.’
‘Anyway,’ I say. ‘It’s not a front now. They know who runs it.’
‘But they don’t know you’ve got a settlement behind it.’
‘A settlement that’s building an army for the king,’ I say. I’d mentioned this before to Lancelot. I’d said then that is was for when the king returned to reclaim the north, but he’d kept quiet as if he thought it might never happen. He keeps quiet when I say it now too.
‘Anyway, you haven’t seen the best,’ Bernard says. ‘You haven’t seen my level. Come on.’
Tye stands, hands on hips, his yellow orange hair falling over his forehead. As we walk away he says sulkily, ‘I’ll stay up here, thanks. I’ve got some stuff to do.’
Bernard ignores him, deep in conversation with Lancelot, explaining how wonderful everything is. Thorvald the miner is walking behind us, quiet and thoughtful like always.
We go down the stone steps and the atmosphere changes. It gets cooler and the acrid smell of hydrochloric acid stings our noses. We go past the first acid traps and Bernard proudly shows them off. Then we’re past the acid golems who lurk in the walls, their hollow eyes like mere indentations in the stone until they come alive. I get a shiver in my back as I walk on by, as if their strange intelligence is observing me from deep in their stone brains.
We go over the bridge over the acid river and Bernard points out the acid eels that hang still there until they come alive. ‘There’s loot down there,’ he says.
‘In the acid?’ Lancelot sounds interested. He either is interested, or he’s a damn good actor.
We finally get to Bernard’s chambers. Now they’re fully finished they are pretty impressive. I turn to Thorvald. ‘Good job here. Really good work.’
Thorvald bows, but I can tell he’s pleased.
‘So I wanted more the open plan area,’ Bernard is saying. He gestures around him and the ceiling vault is maybe twenty feet up. There are crystal chandeliers of purple amethyst, red agate and golden citrine that cast multi-coloured spots of light around the chamber. The place is decked out like a workshop with benches and weird looking machinery. The dwarfs who work the runes are frozen waiting to come alive. There are the iron golems, in parts or the huge ones that stand sentinel like around the chamber.
‘And the level loot here is what?’
Bernard smirks. He leads Lancelot over to the two mirrors that stand covered in sheets. He invites Lancelot to remove the sheets, which the knight does. He stands back, one sheet in hand, not knowing what to make of the mirror he has just uncovered, because it looks pretty ordinary. Bernard is still grinning and he directs Lancelot to the next sheet covered mirror. The knight removes that sheet and stands puzzled until Bernard says, ‘Step in.’
’Step in?’
‘Yes.’
‘The mirror?’
‘Duh, yeah,’ Bernard says.
Lancelot’s brow furrows. ‘How do I do that?’
‘With your foot?’
The knight and tentatively points a leather covered toe to the mirror. He raises his eyebrows when his toe enters the silvered glass. ‘Oh,’ he says.
Bernard is insistent. ‘Step right in.’
I watch as Lancelot gets eaten up by the mirror. First his leg, then half his body, then he’s completely gone.
Bernard turns to me when Lancelot is gone. ‘He could do with one of these in Guinevere’s bedroom, am I right?’
‘Sheesh Bernard! Don’t say that. He’ll kill you,’ I hiss at the alchemist just as Lancelot steps out of the second mirror, a broad grin on his face. ‘That was amazing! Bernard, you can be my alchemist. I just want you to stay in my castle and make me cool stuff like you’ve made here.’
Bernard is very pleased. ‘That’s a very kind offer, Sir Lancelot, but I’m already employed here. I do appreciate your…’
‘He was joking,’ I say.
Lancelot shakes his head. ‘No, I wasn’t. Bernard, if you ever change your mind, you’ve got a job.’
Bernard grins. ‘I make cool runes too.’
‘I bet you do.’
Thorvald who has been standing quietly watching, basking in reflected praise, because he actually built this place, says quietly. ‘Can we switch it on?’
‘The dungeon?’ I ask.
He nods. ‘I’d just like to see it working. I’ve never seen the people here move.’
When he says people he means NPCs. He’s an NPC just like them.
I look to Bernard who says, ‘Absolutely, but it’ll take adventurers a long time to get down here. They have to get past Tye first.’
‘There probably won’t be anyone here for a while. It’s been shut a few days, it’ll take a while for word to get out.’
I go to the dungeon schematics in my HUD and turn the dungeon tab to ‘active.’
I say, ‘Should we walk back up to Level One?’
Lancelot nods.
Bernard says, ‘I’ll stay here. I just want to bask in the place. Maybe I’ll get the dwarfs here to make me some dazzle runes.’
The previously frozen NPCs are now moving. The whole workshop comes alive to the sound of ringing hammers and bubbling
potions. The iron golems stand, still unmoving, but definitely more threatening. They track us with their red glass eyes. I walk with Lancelot and Thorvald and we’re just back to the bridge over the acid river when I get a ping on my HUD. A notification has popped up to show me new adventurers are now in the dungeon.
I check and see six red blips moving into the first corridor. There they’ll meet low level fire slimes and a fire elemental. There’s a bit of loot in the Ruined Chapel but nothing startlingly good.
‘Can I come and watch?’ Lancelot asks.
I frown. Because I’m on the dungeon crew list, I can switch on Observation Mode, I’m about to explain that he isn’t to Lancelot when I come across the obvious solution. I add him to dungeon crew.
He gets a message and smiles.
I say, ‘Switch on Observation Mode. That way you can see the adventurers but you can’t interact with them and they can’t see you.’
Lancelot’s grinning as I see him vanish. If you have Observation Mode on, you can’t see other dungeon crew either. I switch mine on.
Thorvald says to thin air, ‘I’ll come with you back to the connecting door to Silver Drift them make myself scarce, if you’ll let me through, Sir Gorrow.’
‘Sure of course.’ Then I realise that though I’m invisible, Thorvald isn’t and if the adventurers see him they’ll likely kill him.
I beckon. ‘Let’s go.’
‘I can’t see you, sir.’
‘Just follow the sound of footsteps.’
We hurry back through Level 2 then up the stone steps and were into the fire zone of Level One. The temperature is scorching now all the fires and fire mobs are active. They won’t attack Thorvald and he won’t set off the traps because he’s set as friendly to the dungeon. We go through Tye’s chambers. He can’t see me, but he sees Thorvald. He looks puzzled until I say, ‘I’ve got Observation Mode on. You should too.’
‘Ah, it’s Gorrow.’ Puzzlement gone, he shakes his head. ‘No, I’m boss of this level. I’m not going to hide. By the way,’ he says. ‘Have you seen who it is?’
I hadn’t checked. I do now.
