by Alisa Woods
“Explain it to me.” He held her gaze, telling her with his eyes that he wasn’t leaving until they sorted through this.
“Nothing good has ever come from what white wolves can do.”
“Are you talking about your grandfather? Because Daniel wasn’t thrilled about that guy, either, but he figured out that he’s not his grandfather. Neither is Noah. Just because you’re a white wolf, doesn’t mean you need to be like that asshole. You can be different.”
“I’m already different!” She flung a hand toward the window that overlooked the field. “Did you not just see what I did?”
He tilted his head and peered at her. “Do you know what I saw? I saw a woman whose magic is so instinctively protective, that she kept all of us, everyone in that field, from being injured even when it let loose.”
She scowled at him and leaned back. “What do you mean?”
“I mean you didn’t hurt anyone—and that wasn’t by accident. That’s part of who you are.”
She shook her head and dropped her gaze. “You’ve no idea what I’m capable of.”
“Maybe not,” he admitted. “But I know what you have. A pack. A family. An amazing power. Everything I would love to have. I would give my left arm—”
“You can have it!” She slammed her fists down on the blanket on either side of her. He captured her hands with his, covering them and holding them down. He leaned closer and peered into her eyes. “You’re a good person, Zoe.” It was amazing and confusing to him that she didn’t already know it.
She pulled her hands out from underneath his and folded her arms across her chest again, locking herself down and shutting him out.
Then she glowered at him. “Did you know that the Wolf Hunter is a white wolf?” she asked, carefully watching his expression.
He leaned back. "Really?"
"Yes," she threw back at him like it was an accusation. "And he killed his mother at birth.”
What the hell? Troy’s disgust must have been showing on his face because Zoe nodded and went on. “Terra told me—when he was torturing her, getting his jollies off on slicing up my cousin, he spilled his whole life story. About how he never knew who his father was. How he grew up an orphan in the foster care system. How he always felt like there was something wrong with him, but he never knew what it was until he saw Grace Krepky come out as a white wolf. And then, as he went back through his records and found out how his mother died, he discovered the monster he truly was.”
Troy had no idea why this had her so worked up, but he just gave her a nod to encourage her to go on. “Okay.”
“And do you know what he found?”
Troy shook his head.
“That he had shifted in the womb and killed his mother at birth.”
He frowned. “That’s not normal, Zoe, you have to know that. Most wolves give birth just fine—”
“No, you’re exactly right. It’s not normal. Because he’s not normal. He’s a white wolf. And so am I. And guess what? My mother died in childbirth as well.”
Oh shit. “Zoe, I’m sorry—”
She gave a huff of a laugh, but it had no humor in it. “Not as sorry as I am.”
He didn’t even know what to say that. “Zoe, I…” He was stumbling.
“You don’t have to say anything. I know how awful it is. But don’t pretend you know what I am. Or what I’m capable of. Even I don’t know… but it’s nothing I want any part of. And nothing I want to pass on.”
He frowned. “So this is why you don’t want a mate. You’re serious about that.”
“Deadly serious.” She wouldn’t meet his attempt to peer into her eyes.
He hesitated and then reached for her hand. She didn’t pull away this time, so he held it gently in his. He waited until she finally looked up and kept his voice as soft as he possibly could. “You’re a good person, Zoe.” She started shaking her head, so he rushed through the rest. “To me. You’re trying to catch the Wolf Hunter. You’re scared of who you are, yet you went out into the field and tried to join in. You tried to help out. Not only are you not a bad person, as far as I can tell, you’re beautiful, brilliant woman. And an amazing wolf. Like Skylar said, you’re a rare combination—but that doesn’t mean you have to do this by yourself. Believe me, I know what it’s like to be all alone. I was one of those kids who was born to a human mother with a deadbeat shifter dad who knocked her up and then took off. I barely fought my way out of the gangs downtown. There was no one to help me. No one to look out for me. But I wanted to be something better than a criminal. Something better than a wolf who had to hide who he was. I worked hard to become a firefighter and then an EMT. Now I have my crew, but this wolf pack thing? I’ve never had anything like this. And now that I see what it’s like, I want all of it. Everything there is to being a wolf. I know you grew up with it, and I know you’re scared of this white wolf thing, but don’t throw it all away.” He pulled her closer. “Let me in, Zoe. Let me be part of your world.” He couldn’t say it any more clearly.
Her eyes were glued to their hands holding one another. She stared at them for a long moment, licking her lips and then biting them. If she kept that up, he wouldn’t wait for her to bridge the gap or say anything—he would just kiss her.
But then she spoke. “You’re a good man, Troy.” She slowly dragged her gaze up to meet his. “Too good for me. You need to leave.”
It was a door slamming in his face, but it felt like steel spikes ramming through his chest. He leaned back and dropped her hand.
“If that’s the way you want it.” He couldn’t keep the sting out of his voice.
She looked away and stared at a point on the far wall, not even facing him. Basically telling him with her body language to get the hell out. He slowly rose from the bed, every part of him, including his wolf, begging him to stay. Howling for him to go over to her and pull her into his arms and demand that she open up to him.
But he had no right to that, no matter how much he wanted it.
Or how much he thought she needed it.
He paused at her door, hand on the doorknob. “I won’t leave the estate. But I will leave you alone.”
Then he left, quietly closing the door behind him.
It had been days, and Troy had kept his promise—he left her alone.
Zoe’s wolf was complaining like one of her limbs had been chopped off.
Here was a man who literally knew more about her than any man ever had, including her own father—and he still wanted her. And she had just shoved him away.
Zoe tried to focus on the reams of data on her screen, but it was all becoming blurred. She told herself it wasn’t tears, and half the time that wasn’t a lie, but she wasn’t getting anything done.
The truth was, she had always shoved away anyone who might get close. Definitely anyone who might discover her white wolf, much less want to take her to bed, or God forbid, become her mate. Somehow, Troy had avoided all the obstacles she normally put up. He had gotten around all her defenses. He had saved her life. He had discovered her secret. He had cared about her in a way that no one who wasn’t already family ever had. On top of that, he was insanely sexy… and stupidly stubborn, refusing to give up every time she pushed him away.
Only maybe now he had given up… and it was tearing her up inside.
What the hell was she going to do with that?
For years, she had buried herself in work, in school, and in anything else involving her father’s laboratory at the University. Being the professor’s daughter made her somewhat famous among the students, but also somewhat off-limits. And she used that for all it was worth. She simply didn’t date. And that worked fabulously… until a hot firefighter came in and saved her from certain death.
Four days had passed at the River family estate since she had pushed Troy away… but here he was, still haunting her thoughts. And her wolf was hypersensitive to the fact that he slept every night just on the other side of the wall.
Zoe slammed her l
aptop closed and shoved it away. She was getting nowhere with her data analysis anyway, and the lab equipment she needed was still on order. She was determined to find the Wolf Hunter’s father before he did, but she was getting nowhere holed up in her room.
And she was going stir crazy.
What she needed was a walk out in the fresh breeze. Some good mountain air to clear her head. Maybe then she could purge her thoughts of Troy and his hot body—as long as she didn’t run into him on the way out.
She hid behind her own closed door for a ridiculously long time, listening to the creaks and moans of the house, making sure no one was coming or going from Troy’s room next door. Then she snuck out and wound her way through the hallways toward the front, pattering down the steps and making a run for the front door, hoping to slip outside before anyone noticed.
But she wasn’t fast enough.
“Zoe?”
She was relieved it was only Mama River.
Zoe straightened and turned to face her, trying to recover some dignity and act like she hadn’t been sneaking around like a prison escapee. “Good morning, Mama River!” she said brightly.
“It’s good to see you out of your room.” Mama River eased up to the front door. “But if you’re headed outside, you might want to leave through the back.” She tipped her head toward the front porch outside.
Zoe couldn’t figure out what she was saying… until she heard the voices. At first, she thought the deep voice was Troy’s, and Mama River was warning her off—was it so obvious that she was avoiding him? But when she listened more closely, she realized it was Grace and the mayor.
Zoe dropped her voice to a whisper. “Is that the mayor again?”
Mama River nodded, then arched an eyebrow in the direction of his voice. “He keeps coming round.”
Zoe smiled wide. “I think he’s hot for you, Mama River.”
The older woman scowled at her, but there wasn’t much heat behind it. In fact, Zoe could swear there was a fresh sparkle in her eyes. “What would the mayor of Seattle want with an old woman like me?”
Zoe leaned back. “You’re kidding, right? You’re beautiful and amazing and one of the nicest people I’ve ever met.” Heat rushed her face as she realized how much she was gushing, but it was true—Mama River had taken Zoe under her wing while she hid up in the mountains. The woman had a reputation for being super friendly and taking in every wolf who came through her door, but Zoe had never had a chance to experience it firsthand. And it didn’t take long for her to understand the fierce loyalty of the shifters who had stayed behind to protect her when the Wolf Hunter had outed the safehouse location.
Zoe shrugged and fought through her embarrassment. “I’m just saying, any man would be lucky to have a woman like you in his life.”
Mama River seemed to be getting a chuckle out of Zoe’s awkwardness, then she turned serious again. “I’m not interested in any man…”
“That’s not what I meant—”
Mama River stopped her cold with a tilt of her head that said she wasn’t done speaking. Zoe buttoned her lip.
“The mayor is a fine man,” Mama River said. “I see what he’s done for the city, even before the Wolf Hunter emerged as a threat. For years, he’s helped to foster a thriving city where my three boys could have their business and live their lives. Since the Wolf Hunter has been making his threats, I’ve seen the mayor take step after step to slowly open the city up to the idea of shifters being welcome here as much as anyone else. And I truly appreciate that. Not every human loves us the way that the mayor clearly does.”
“Loves us?” Zoe thought that was taking it a little bit too far.
But Mama River just nodded in that wise way she had, and Zoe wondered if she had missed something. “I was angry with him at first,” Mama River said. “I’ll admit that. When he demanded to take Terra into protective custody, I wasn’t so sure about his motives. Even last week, when he came to the house, seeking you out, Zoe, I wasn’t entirely convinced.”
Zoe raised her eyebrows. “But you are now?”
She had a little more sparkle in her eyes. “He can be quite charming.”
Zoe let out a small laugh, and it felt good, releasing some of the tension that had been working into her muscles as she hunched over her computer for days on end. “Men can be that way, can’t they? But are you sure about this one, Mama River? He’s a politician, after all.”
“Oh, yes, I’m quite aware of that.” She didn’t lose her smile. “But I see something in him… he has the kind of heart my husband had for caring. He’s looking out for you and Terra and Grace especially, and he’s just as protective as my husband would’ve been if we’d ever had those daughters he wanted so badly.”
That made Zoe’s heart squeeze. “Do you miss him very much? Your husband, I mean.”
Mama River’s face softened. “It’s been many years, but my house had been filled to overflowing, and that helps fill the hole in my heart. It’s what my Richard would’ve wanted, all of this.” She gestured to the house around them. “The mayor is helping the people I love, the wolves under my care, and that earns a special place in my heart. It’s unfortunate that he’s human.” She had a small smile on her face, almost wistful. “If he were a wolf, I might consider it.”
Zoe was back to grinning again. “Well, not every hot man has to be a mate for life. You could just…” She waggled her eyebrows, hoping that wouldn’t be too much.
Mama River laughed, then gave her a knowing look. “When you’ve had a mate, Zoe Wilding, you’ll understand that simply taking a hot man to bed is a pale reflection of what you can have. No, if I can’t have it all, at this point, I’m not really interested. Besides, with so much of my family under siege, that’s where my heart lies. And where my attention belongs.”
That stabbed another pain through Zoe’s chest—for Mama River’s loss of her mate, and the idea that she might never find that again. It didn’t seem right, especially for someone as wonderful as her. “I hope you find someone, someday, who can be all the things you want.”
Mama River smiled. “That’s funny, I was about to say the same thing to you.”
Heat rushed to Zoe’s face again. “Oh.” She grimaced. “I’m not looking for a mate.” But the words felt like a lie as soon as they left her mouth, and Mama River wasn’t the kind she could lie to. At least not easily. Or have much chance of getting away with it.
“That’s not how mates work,” Mama River scolded her lightly. “Your mate finds you—or at least, your mate comes into your life. It’s up to you to peer inside and see them for who they truly are.”
Zoe had no idea what to say that. Mama River couldn’t understand her dilemma—in spite of what had happened yesterday out in the field, Zoe was pretty sure no one had spilled her secret. And even if they had, Mama River wouldn’t understand why there was no mate on earth who would work for her. Not until she was cured.
As she was struggling for something to say, the front door started to open behind her. Zoe stepped out of the way as Grace and the mayor strolled in.
“Zoe!” Grace said, wrapping her thin arms around Zoe to give her a big hug. “Just the person I wanted to see.” She turned back to the mayor. “You’ve met Mayor Truhall, right?”
Zoe held out her hand. “Nice to see you again, Mr. Mayor.”
He shook her hand in return. “If you don’t start calling me Robert, I think it might actually hurt my feelings.”
Zoe smiled and ducked her head. She could see what Mama River was saying about charming—and good-looking, too. The mayor had that sexy older man look to him, with sparkling blue eyes and just a little bit of gray kissing his dark hair. He wasn’t sleazy or smarmy the way she expected a politician to be. Or even an older man who might hit on a pretty young thing like Grace. Or Zoe, for that matter. His wink was friendly, almost fatherly, and his gaze quickly settled on Mama River’s face.
“Mrs. River, a pleasure to see you again.” This time, the mayor’s smi
le had a little more warmth in it than necessary. And his eyes crinkled just a bit as if he wasn’t entirely certain he was welcome at the estate… but hoped he would be.
“My door is always open for people who are supporting the shifters I love.” It seemed to be a statement saying something more, but Zoe couldn’t quite decipher it.
It made the mayor smile. “Well, then, I feel lucky to be counted among those.”
Grace tucked her hand around the mayor’s arm, giving him a little bit of a squeeze in an affectionate way, almost like a daughter would. “Mama River,” she said giving the older woman a serious look. “Mayor Truhall has been more supportive of shifters than any other politician I have met on the campaign trail. If you need references for him, please look me up.”
The mayor laughed a little, but Zoe could tell the shine in his eyes for Grace was truly affectionate as well.
“Grace, do you want to come upstairs?” Zoe asked. “I’ve got some data you might find interesting.” Zoe was thinking that leaving the mayor and Mama River to a little alone time might foster whatever budding romance they had going.
Grace bit her lip and ran a quick scan over the three of them—the mayor, Mama River, and Zoe—but shook her head. “I dragged the mayor all the way up here to see something special, Zo. Not just to keep me company during the drive.” She gave him a little smile.
“You dragged me away from a city planning meeting, for which I am intensely grateful.” He smiled. “But I am intrigued to see this dream team you’ve assembled.”
Dream team? Zoe raised her eyebrows and sent a quizzical look to Grace. She just nodded. “I’ve told the mayor that we might have a special group of wolves who would be a force to contend with, once we find this Wolf Hunter person.”
The mayor held up his hands. “Officially, I cannot condone a vigilante group of wolves who may or may not be out to apprehend the criminals who are terrorizing the shifter populace.” He dropped his hands and lowered his voice. “But just between us, I want to see you catch the bastard. If you have a special team, and if you happen to beat my police force to the punch, it would help me to have some measure of knowledge ahead of time in order to justify the necessity of it.”
