“What about Mary?”
“I think she must have loved my mother very much to take me into her heart. It all is so very tragic.”
“Do you think Jeremiah and Mary regretted raising you as their own?”
When she recalled the wonderful moments of the three together, she had no doubts. “No, I am very sure they loved me. I remember the laughter and the good times we had together. Pa often brought us wildflowers, and Ma always made a big fuss. He liked to hear her sing, and she always had a song. Sometimes late at night, they would sit out on the front porch and Ma would sing. He would come and lift me from my bed and hold me in his lap until the precious sound of her voice lulled me to sleep. Yes, Peyton, I’m sure they loved me.”
“So, knowing Seth Colter is your real father doesn’t change the feelings you have for any of them?”
When he phrased it that way, the confusion vanished. “No, I guess not. If anything I should love them more for their devotion to me and keeping the secret. If I consider it all, Seth could have made my life miserable when I came here, but he put aside the past and welcomed me into his home. Today he told me that seeing me was like looking at my mother again. And then I consider Aunt Elizabeth, who could have resented me and sent me back to the Comanches, but she loves me, too.”
“You might want to tell them those exact words,” Peyton said, taking her hand.
“I know I should, but I feel so strange and uncomfortable knowing he is my real father and that I never knew my mother. I’m sure I can forgive my father for giving me up, but it will take some getting used to.”
Peyton toyed with her fingers then kissed them lightly. “Katie, Seth Colter made a mistake when he gave you to Jeremiah and Mary, but they loved your parents and chose to make you a blessing. In his pain, Seth believed he could live his life as your uncle. He gave his word to ensure that very thing. He may have been grieving, yet he recognized his child needed a good home. Then he came to know the Lord, and his commitment to Jeremiah and Mary demonstrated real love. His feelings for you went far beyond the baby given to his brother and wife. Seth knew real love, an unselfish giving for the benefit of others. I’m sure it bothered him every day of his life, and I’m even more sure God became his only source of comfort and peace.”
How she treasured this man. “Peyton, you always see things so clearly,”
“Not really. I’m a stubborn man, and I want things to go my way, but I pray God always puts me back on the right path.”
Katie contemplated Peyton’s words. She couldn’t ignore the truth or deny Seth’s confession. Their relationship might be awkward, but it was up to her to take the next step.
“You’re right, Peyton. If God doesn’t judge Seth, and He has forgiven him, I should do the same.”
“Why don’t you let me finish up here, and you can go see him?”
“Oh, it would be so difficult. I don’t know if I am ready to face him.”
“The longer you wait, the harder it will be.”
Katie understood exactly what Peyton meant. She didn’t want a wall built between her and Seth, neither did she want Jeremiah and Mary’s memory tarnished with bitterness. Katie recalled Seth telling her that forgiveness led to freedom. The truth didn’t change how others had loved her. It confirmed it.
She rose to leave. “I’ll go now,” she said. “One of my fathers needs to know I love him.”
“Do you want me to go with you?” he said.
“No, I should do this myself…. Peyton?”
“Yes.”
“I’m still amazed at how you always manage to see things so clearly.”
He laughed and broke the seriousness of the moment. “It’s much easier to tell someone else how to handle their problems than to solve your own. Remember, I ran away from mine. I joined the army rather than face my family’s disappointment over my decision to leave medical school.”
“You and I seem to face one dark situation after another,” she said. “Do you suppose our lives will ever smooth out?”
“I hope so,” he said. “Right now I’m praying we can get through the next two weeks.”
And Katie clearly saw the concerned lines across his forehead. The Kiowa must come soon.
Katie heard the pounding of Seth’s hammer shaping a piece of metal into something useful. She stopped to listen and noted the rhythm sounded faster than usual. Perhaps he had too much work to do and didn’t have time to speak with her, or he might feel the blacksmith wasn’t a fitting place to talk about delicate matters. She could easily put off this conversation until another time.
She forced herself to walk into the pathway of the three-sided structure that housed the blacksmith. The forge was warm, and she knew without looking that Seth’s face would be red from the heat. At first he didn’t see her, but the late afternoon sun cast her shadow in his path. Both of them held back a greeting as though any utterance of words might be interpreted as cold or angry.
“Did you want to see me?” Seth said, breaking the deafening silence.
“Yes, if you aren’t too busy,” Katie said.
“No, Katie child, I always have time for you. Please come inside and warm yourself.”
Now she comprehended the reason he always referred to her as Katie child. She stepped farther into the blacksmith, welcoming the warmth and praying for her words to come easily.
“I’ve been thinking and talking to Peyton about what you told me,” she began. “The news is still a shock, but it doesn’t or shouldn’t change how I feel about you or those who raised me. I love you dearly, and I don’t want uncomfortable feelings between us. If forgiveness is what you ask, then I forgive you. The things you told me will take some time to get used to, but I’m willing to accept them as part of the past.”
“I can’t ask for more than love and forgiveness,” he said. “I wish I could make what happened easier for you to bear.”
“It’s just going to take time…I gather you won’t want anyone else to know about this, so I won’t tell a soul.”
“I don’t want things to remain the same. Is that what you want?” he said. A furrow inched across his brow.
Katie shook her head. “I don’t know. I mean, you are my father, not my uncle, and my head is filled with questions about my mother.”
“I know this is soon, but would you consider calling me Papa, maybe not right now, but later on, when you are more settled about it all?”
Katie searched his face. This is my father, my real father. “I like the sound of it, especially when Jacob calls you Papa,” she said. “I called my—other father—Pa, so Papa would be different. What if folks ask why I stopped referring to you as Uncle?”
“I don’t care about other folks. Too many years have gone by without me being able to claim my daughter, and I intend to make up for lost time.”
“All right, then, Papa it is. And what should I call Aunt Elizabeth?”
He smiled. “Perhaps simply Elizabeth?”
She nodded. “Will you still give me away at the wedding?”
Tears formed in his eyes. He set his tools aside, peeled off his gloves, and welcomed her into his arms.
Over the next few days, Katie experienced sadness and grief as she dealt with the truth. She mentally rehearsed calling Seth Papa, but her resolve didn’t stop tense moments when she allowed her mind to slip back to the mother she never knew. At those times, she sought out her newfound father and together they laughed and cried about Hannah Colter. Katie learned from Elizabeth some of Mary Colter’s own words regarding the love she held for Katie. To the best of Elizabeth’s knowledge, Mary never knew Elizabeth had been told the truth about Katie. For certain the Colter brothers grew into men of integrity.
Events and happenings of Jeremiah’s last days now made sense. He rightfully sent her to Seth when he realized impending death would not allow him to fulfill his responsibilities. His instructions to find her rehoboth meant learning the truth about her parents. If so, Katie’s search had ended.
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br /> She recalled when Papa learned of her arrival, he left his blacksmith and welcomed her into his home. Now his emotion, his patience with her struggle with God, and his careful discernment of a proper suitor. Elizabeth had encouraged her to seek his council on matters of importance. Now it all made sense. She smiled each time she recalled the night he stood ready to thrash Peyton if he talked or acted in an inappropriate way. It was also the night he referred to Peyton as a good son-in-law. At the time, Katie thought he merely used the term as a way of expressing his fondness for Peyton.
Christmas and the wedding rapidly approached, and Katie willingly pushed aside the confusion of her origin. She frantically stitched and fashioned Christmas gifts for Elizabeth, Papa, the children, and Peyton. After much deliberation, she decided to sew Peyton a deerskin jacket from the pile of hides in the bottom of her trunk. She was so pleased with the results that she took another piece and made a vest for Papa and a smaller one for Jacob. There were embroidered handkerchiefs and a bonnet for Elizabeth and a muslin face doll for Emily. The gifts might have been a bit extravagant, but this was her first real Christmas since Mary had died, and it was the Christmas of her wedding. Next year she and Peyton would be living in Illinois and unable to spend the holiday with her family.
Always, in the darkest part of Katie’s mind, there lived the threat of Lone Eagle destroying all their hopes and dreams. Only Peyton shared her fears, and the two planned for their future as though the warrior’s threat was hollow. She wondered if she should speak more with Peyton about Lone Eagle, but she didn’t want to spoil the excitement or dampen his enthusiasm. The Kiowa had not shown his face in weeks.
Chapter Sixteen
Is everything finished for tomorrow?” Elizabeth said as she stirred a bowl filled with batter for honey cakes. “Yes, ma’am, I’ve got things in order at the cabin and here,” Katie said. “I’m all ready to take up housekeeping.”
Elizabeth went through the list of all the items that needed to be in place and completed for the wedding and the reception.
“Tonight I’ll finish the pies, and Martha says she has two cakes ready. Lauren and her sisters will help serve, and oh, I nearly forgot—Mrs. Ames brought by a huge apple cobbler. Let’s see now…tablecloths are clean, and so are all the cups for the punch.”
“Hopefully it will warm up a little tomorrow. I detest the thought of guests leaving early, but I’m afraid they are going to get cold,” Elizabeth said. “Of course, having the reception at your cabin will help with a roaring fire.”
“It’s simply going to be wonderful,” Katie said. She picked up Emily and whirled her around the room. “Won’t it be grand? And then Christmas is the very next day! Oh, Elizabeth, I am so happy.”
“Your mother—both your mothers—would have loved seeing you so beautiful and full of life,” Elizabeth said with a sad smile.
“They can see me,” Katie said. “We just can’t see them.”
“I guess you’re right. For certain, you are going to be the loveliest bride this fort has ever seen. Seth is about to burst, and he’s invited absolutely everyone.”
Katie laughed. “Well, he didn’t invite Mrs. Ames, because I did. She promised me she would be here.”
Katie danced across the room with Emily, all the while humming a lively tune. “You know what? I’d like to go riding this afternoon.”
“Child, it’s too cold for a pleasure ride.”
“Not really. That’s how Pa and I used to celebrate Christmas. We would go for a long ride; then he would give me my gift.”
“But it’s not possible. There’s no one to go with you,” Elizabeth said. “Seth is working long hours to finish shoeing horses for the colonel, and Peyton is busy with drills.”
“Peyton is off duty from this afternoon through Christmas Day. Colonel Ross called it a wedding present.” Katie continued to dance across the room, and Emily enjoyed every minute of it.
“Is Peyton aware of your riding adventure?” Elizabeth said in pretended annoyance. “Or is this a surprise for him, too?”
“He knows, although his reaction was similar to yours. He will be here shortly to see if I am allowed to go.”
Elizabeth shook her head and pointed to Emily’s need to be changed. Snatching up clean clothes for the toddler, Katie proceeded to clean her up.
“I don’t suppose there is any talking you out of this idea of yours?”
“No, ma’am. Please don’t be unhappy with me. We won’t be gone long, I promise. When I get back I’ll bake the pies, and then we can spend the rest of the evening together.”
Elizabeth smiled. “Katie, you bundle up warm, or you will be sick for your wedding day. And take my scarf. It’s warmer.”
The sun shone down long enough to send the temperatures up a few degrees, and it beat warm on Peyton’s and Katie’s backs as they left Fort Davis. Peyton rode his bay mare and Katie rode her spotted horse. She hadn’t ridden since coming to the fort, but Papa had made sure the animal had been exercised and properly groomed. Elizabeth fussed and scolded over Katie’s choice of riding bareback, but it did little good. Elizabeth’s parting words to Peyton warned him of his headstrong bride.
“Don’t let those green eyes and angelic face fool you, Sergeant Sinclair. She will be a handful, mark my word. It’s not too late for you to postpone the wedding and let me train her right for you,” Elizabeth said, attempting to sound angry, but Katie saw right through it.
“I think you want to mother me a while longer.” Katie laughed.
Peyton promised to send her home on a regular basis for training, and Elizabeth appeared satisfied.
The two galloped out over the valley beyond Wild Rose Pass and across the prairie. Although the land looked brown and barren, Katie could easily imagine the green and color of spring. The wind whipped their faces, and Katie was glad Elizabeth had insisted upon a scarf. A quick glance back showed the fort clearly in the distance.
“Slow down, Katie,” Peyton called to her.
“I’m enjoying my last day of freedom,” Katie shouted back, but she did bring the horse to a trot.
“You will need to improve on taking orders,” Peyton said, bringing the bay to her side. “This time tomorrow, Mrs. Peyton Sinclair will be expected to do her husband’s bidding.”
“And if I don’t?” she said, pretending insolence.
“The stockade. That’s where all unruly wives learn military discipline.”
“It probably won’t do a bit of good,” she said. “What comes next?”
Peyton gave her a devilish grin. “I’ll tell you tomorrow.”
She warmed at falling for his wit once again.
He leaned up against the saddle horn. “We may have company.”
“Who?”
He slowed his horse to a walk, and Katie followed his lead. “I saw the Kiowa this morning. I made sure he knew our plans. So if he has a message from Lone Eagle, we will find out shortly.”
“Oh, I don’t think we have to worry.” She looked for signs of the scout. “The wedding’s tomorrow. Lone Eagle would have sent word by now. Surely he’s forgotten about me and won’t waste his time.”
“I hope so,” Peyton said, but she heard doubt lacing his words.
Her gaze met Peyton’s. “I don’t believe he has decided to leave me alone, either. But he’s nearly run out of time.”
“I agree, sweetheart.” Peyton pulled his horse to a stop, and Katie did the same. “We ought to start back. The air’s getting colder, and there’s no sign of the Kiowa.”
“Does anyone besides Colonel Ross and myself know you speak Comanche?” she said.
“No, and I don’t intend for anyone to find out. Too many times it’s helped me get out of trouble.”
“Or into trouble.”
“Well, that, too.”
The horses picked their way through the terrain toward Fort Davis, and Katie allowed Peyton’s teasing to keep her mind from the Kiowa. She wanted to savor every minute alone with Peyton so
she would always remember the afternoon of December 23, the day before their wedding.
A gust of northern wind blew a harsh chill against their faces, and she shivered.
“Are you thinking the Kiowa may not have a message for me?” The idea of Lone Eagle setting her free was precious, even if it did sound like a fool’s dream.
“Sweetheart, I’ve prayed for that very thing,” he said. “I want it all to be over, just like you do—perhaps more so. I don’t care how selfish it sounds, but our wedding needs to begin without any fear of Lone Eagle’s influence in our lives. When we’re married, I will relax.”
“We haven’t talked about it for several weeks,” Katie said. “Once I worried he would make his demands after we were married, except…oh, never mind.”
“What, Katie? This time tomorrow we will be husband and wife. I think you can tell me what’s floating around in that blond head of yours.”
She patted the neck of her spotted horse then tightened the scarf around her neck. “I don’t think Lone Eagle would want me after I had a husband. For then his aggression would look like revenge instead of asserting his power,” she said. “Unless he intended to punish me.”
“He won’t have much time to plan anything of the sort. I’d like to head back to Illinois before the spring. He can’t follow us there.”
“True, and he’s not about to let up on the raids. We’re foolish to think otherwise. The Kiowa spoke true when he pointed out the Comanches wouldn’t fight over a woman,” Katie said, finally voicing her fears. “Pride and honor might send him after me, but nothing else. Lone Eagle won’t give up until the army stops the whole Comanche nation.”
“You can be certain of that,” Peyton said. “The army will have to send reinforcements before any security is made in this territory, and…look up to the ridge, Katie!”
She fastened her gaze on a ridge to the west of them. The afternoon sun provided a backdrop to the party of over fifty Comanche warriors. Their horses pranced, eager to run, and fear ripped through every part of her. Black war paint, the color of death, fairly glistened on their faces. Lone Eagle’s horse stepped out in full view.
Journey of the Heart Page 13
