by Elaine Hart
“And what is that?” she asked.
“Are you in love with him?” he asked and turned to her.
She stepped back and shook her head at him. “You cannot ask such a thing of me.”
“Why on earth not? It is a simple question,” Hudson said and crossed his arms.
“That may be, but it is a complicated answer. You are well aware of how things work. Love is not something that is granted to everyone. Sometimes we as women need to make difficult choices and be obedient to our parents,” Lady Diana answered.
“Can you stand here in front of me and honestly say that you would rather compromise your own happiness in order to be obedient to your family?” he asked.
Lady Diana pursed her lips for a moment and nodded as tears filled her eyes. “Yes.”
“You are lying.”
“Hudson, you cannot do this to me,” she whispered.
“I am not doing anything to you. I am not allowed,” he scowled. “Because I am a simple stable hand, I am not worthy of you.”
“That is not true. You are a wonderful man who deserves someone who is equally as wonderful, and who treats you the way you deserve to be treated,” she said and slowly approached him. “I am sincerely sorry, Hudson.”
Hudson looked at her with the same intensity she wished him to. It was wrong of her to wish such things but, gazing into his warm and inviting eyes, she was unable to help herself. She placed her hand on his chest and felt the fast beating of his heart under her hand.
Hudson leaned in closer and kissed her on the lips. For a moment, she was relieved that he had done it and that she was not required to fight her feelings any longer, but that moment did not seem to last very long as she pulled away and shook her head.
“No.”
“Diana...”
“You will address me as you should, Hudson,” she said angrily as she wiped the corner of her mouth, still feeling Hudson’s lips on hers.
“I am sorry. I should not have done that.”
“Indeed. You should not have. I am a taken woman,” she said and turned way.
“My lady, wait.”
She spun around and glanced at him, tears in her eyes.
“Sometimes we are not in control of our feelings,” he said.
“Please, keep your distance from me. You will not jeopardise my impending marriage with the Duke,” Lady Diana said angrily and stormed out of the stables.
Hudson gazed out at the night sky, at the stars that twinkled against the darkness. He was seated in the dark, on a large hay bale, attempting to silence all the voices in his mind, and his heart. He silently scolded himself for kissing Lady Diana in the stables earlier that day. He had not planned on kissing her, especially not in such a way, but he could not help himself. Ever since the very first day he saw her, she was the most beautiful and intriguing young woman he had ever seen in his entire life. He had never known someone such as her, especially not as titled as she was. He had met many young women who were daughters of dukes, earls and viscounts, and they were all alike. They all looked down on him, as if he was nothing. Lady Diana had been the very first person who made an effort to speak to him and get to know him. Perhaps it was because of her kindness that Hudson had instantly developed feelings for her even though he was well aware that it would either go nowhere, or end in tragedy. It usually ended before it even began, and that was his choice. He knew his place in the world, and that would not change any time soon. He was the son of a farmer, a stable hand to the wealthy, and that was all he would ever be. The best thing that he could do at this very moment was accept that he would never be able to win Lady Diana’s heart, and that he needed to forget about his feelings for her.
Hudson even reconsidered moving to the estate of the Duke of Newton, Lady Diana’s betrothed. Hudson was certain he would not be able to bear seeing Lady Diana in the arms of another man. Perhaps he could return to Lord Stanley’s estate. It would be heartbreaking to leave Starlight behind, but it was something he needed to consider. Things were not set out to get easier, and Hudson wished to leave before it became unbearable.
He heard footsteps coming along the path and he glanced in the direction they came from. He stood and walked around the stables, stopping in his tracks.
Never in his entire life had he expected Lady Diana to be walking towards the stables, especially not at this hour, and especially not after their encounter that afternoon.
“My lady?” he asked and she glanced at him as she continued to approach him. “Is something the matter?”
She shoved him against his chest, causing him to take a few steps back, and he was surprised at how strong she was. “You had no right to kiss me, Hudson!”
Hudson nodded and ran his fingers through his hair. “I am aware of that, but...”
Lady Diana crossed her arms and anxiously waited for him to continue.
“I had no choice.”
“One always has a choice.”
“Apart from who you marry these days,” he scoffed.
“She glared at him angrily and shook her head. “Why did you kiss me?”
“I wanted to, and I knew if you walked out of that door, it would be over and done with,” he answered.
“What on earth do you speak of?”
Hudson stepped forward and answered, “I cannot bear the thought of you with the Duke,” he answered truthfully.
“And why is that?”
“If I am required to say it out loud, then you are not as clever as you think you are,” he answered.
“Say it,” she urged.
“You do not belong with that man, my lady,” he exclaimed.
“And why would you say something like that?” she asked.
“Because you should be with me.”
Before Lady Diana could say anything in return, he pulled her into his embrace and kissed her passionately.
She resisted for a moment, but her body soon relaxed as he kept on kissing her.
Lady Diana felt all the feelings she had for Hudson that she had hidden in the deepest corners of her heart come rushing back and it felt as though her heart would burst.
Lady Diana pulled away slowly, gazed into his deep brown eyes, and she smiled. “This is such a problem,” she whispered.
“Indeed it is.”
She stepped away again and shook her head. “I should not have come.”
“My lady, wait,” he said to her before she turned away.
“I must get back inside. Could we speak of this tomorrow morning, while we take the horses out to the meadow?” she asked. “My head is in a whirl after that kiss.”
Hudson smiled and nodded. “Of course.”
“Sleep well, Hudson,” she said quietly.
“You as well, my lady,” Hudson said to her and watched as she turned around and walked back along the path towards her home.
A smile ran across Hudson’s mouth and he stood outside in the moonlight for a short while, before returning to his quarters.
The following morning, Lady Diana was eager to take Starlight out to the meadow, and even though she struggled to fall asleep after she left Hudson the previous night, and was exhausted, she pretended as though she was fine. Lady Diana and Hudson acted as they usually would until they were out in the meadow, and Hudson pulled her into his embrace and kissed her once again.
“Perhaps we should speak of this,” she suggested as she pulled away from him.
“I was under the impression my kisses were good enough to evade a conversation,” he said as he brushed her hair off her face and traced an invisible line along her jawline.
She scoffed playfully and turned to him. “I am quite serious, Hudson.”
“As am I, my lady,” he whispered, “or may I call you Diana?”
“My lady will do fine for now,” she pouted. “My father will strangle us both if he knew of us.”
“I will risk it.”
Lady Diana sighed and shook her head. “You know not what you speak of, Hudson,
” she said.
“I know that I have feelings for you. Ever since the day I met you. You are unlike anyone I have ever known in my entire life,” he explained.
“And why is that?” she asked.
“On top of your incredible beauty, soft touch, and impeccable manners, you are strong-willed, kind, and not in the least bit snobbish or pretentious. You do not hide who you are, Diana, and that was certainly the most important thing to me,” he answered.
“But where does that leave us, Hudson? My father cannot be made aware of our feelings for one another. I am set to marry the Duke in the autumn.”
“Simple,” Hudson shrugged, “you must call off the wedding, and break the engagement.”
“I cannot do such a thing,” Lady Diana said confidently.
“Indeed you can. If you feel something for me, anything at all, you will end it with the Duke,” he answered.
“That is certainly a lot of pressure,” she sighed.
“Unless of course you wish to marry the Duke,” Hudson shrugged.
“He is a kind man with a big heart, but he is not the man for me,” Lady Diana answered.
“You must tell your father.”
Lady Diana’s eyes widened and she shook her head. “I cannot. I do not possess the courage to tell him of this.”
“If you will not tell him, there is only one option left for us,” he sighed.
“And what is that?”
“Run away with me.”
“That seems like a wonderful idea,” she answered dreamily.
“It certainly is. We could travel back to Scotland, back to where I was born. Perhaps we will find my father’s family,” he said, his brown eyes sparkling at the prospect of Lady Diana traveling with him to Scotland. “Perhaps we should leave now.”
“Now?” she exclaimed.
“Indeed. We can take Merlot and Starlight and simply ride away from here,” he suggested with a smile.
“My father will most certainly alert the authorities and have us dragged back to Powderham within the hour,” she muttered.
“You do not sound too optimistic, my lady,” he said with a furrowed brow and she glanced at him with a worried expression on her face. “What is the matter?”
“I am afraid that I will be forced to marry the Duke, and live as his wife, unable to fully experience love and life as you would have allowed me to experience it.”
“I will not allow that to happen,” he answered and placed his hand on hers. “I will not allow it. I promise you that.”
“What will you be able to do, Hudson? This is the life that was chosen for me to live.”
“No, that is nonsense. Only you can make that choice. No one else has the power to dictate your life,” he said to her.
She sighed and nodded, “You are right, but my mother and father will most certainly not see it that way.”
“You will not know if you do not try,” he said, trying to sound encouraging. Deep in his heart he was well aware that things were not as simple as he made it out to be.
“I will try,” she promised.
Hudson stood up from the grass and helped her up as well. “We should go back.”
“Thank you for being as understanding as you are, and patient as well. I do realize this is difficult for you, but I will speak to my father and mother as soon as it is the right time.”
“Please do not wait too long. I would not wish to lose you to some Duke of Newton,” he said.
She placed her arms around his shoulders and smiled. “You will always have me. That I promise you.”
“Wonderful,” he whispered before he kissed her on the lips.
They rode back in silence while exchanging knowing glances, and Lady Diana entered Powderham Hall through the kitchen.
“And where have you been, my lady?” asked Esther, their loyal cook who had been at the estate ever since Lady Diana could remember.
“I was in the meadow with Starlight,” Lady Diana answered.
“I see,” Esther answered and glanced out the door where Lady Diana had entered a few moments prior. “Did you go to the meadow all alone?”
Lady Diana smiled tightly and said, “Why do you insist on asking questions which you already know the answer to, Esther?”
“You are playing a dangerous game, my lady,” Esther warned her.
“I know not what you speak of, Esther,” Lady Diana shrugged.
“If your father were to find out about Hudson, then there would be big trouble,” she answered.
Lady Diana’s eyes widened and she lowered her voice. “How do you know of that?”
“I saw you kissing him last evening outside the stables.”
Lady Diana cringed and ran her fingers through her hair. “Please, do not say anything to my father. I will speak to him personally.”
“Your father will not be happy about this, my lady.”
“I am well aware of that, Esther,” Lady Diana said. “Promise that you will stay quiet.”
“I promise, dearest Diana.”
“Thank you, Esther.”
“Diana? Is that you?” her father’s voice was heard nearby and Lady Diana froze.
“I was never here,” she whispered and retreated out the door, avoiding her father altogether and disappearing from sight.
Chapter Five
July 1815
Upstairs parlour
Powderham Hall
Exeter
Devonshire
England
Lady Diana glanced up from her cup of tea and studied her parents’ expressions, in the hopes of springing the news of her and Hudson on them while they were in a good mood. Lady Diana had been wrestling inside her heart as to what was the right thing to do.
“You seem rather troubled, my dear,” her mother suddenly pointed out and Lady Diana nearly spilled her tea as a response. She silently scolded herself for outwardly displaying all the wrong signs of what she felt on the inside. She had never been the kind of person who could easily hide her feelings and affections, and it was apparent this afternoon.
“There is something you must be made aware of,” Lady Diana answered and placed her cup on the low table in front of her. She shifted back on the chaise and glanced at her parents, who now seemed even more tense and worried than they had before.
“What is it, dearest Diana?” her mother asked.
“There is no easy way to tell you this, Mother and Father,” she said and paused for a moment, hoping that her courage would not fail her, “but I cannot marry the Duke of Newton.”
Her mother and father exchanged horrified glances which were loaded with disapproval and they looked back at her.
“I beg your pardon?” her father asked.
“I do not wish to marry His Grace.”
“Why on earth not? You agreed that this would be the best thing for you,” her mother pointed out.
“I have come to realize that I do not possess the strong feelings for him as I thought I had.”
“Marriage is not only about feelings, Diana. It is also of duty and loyalty to your family,” the Duchess said.
The Duke narrowed his eyes as he studied his daughter for a short while before asking, “Who is he?”
“I beg your pardon, Father?” she asked with a tone of slight disbelief.
“Who is the man you prefer to marry instead of the Duke?” her father asked and crossed his arms.
“It is a rather long story,” she said.
“We have time,” her father said firmly.
Lady Diana took a deep breath and said, “Father, Mother, you must realize that I did not plan for this to happen. It merely happened.”
“Who is he?”
“Father...”
“Who is the man, Diana?” the Duke asked, his voice raised.
“Hudson,” Lady Diana blurted out.
“Hudson, the stable hand?” her mother exclaimed.
Lady Diana glanced at her mother and nodded. The disappointment was clearly visible o
n both her parents’ faces, but her father exuded more anger than her mother did.
Lady Diana felt the warm tears sting her eyes and said, “Father, please. I am sincerely sorry. I did not mean for this to happen, nor did Hudson—”
“Not another word, Diana,” he bellowed, which caused Lady Diana to purse her lips together, silencing herself entirely.
Her father stood from the chaise and paced around the room. “You fell in love with the stable hand! How can you do that to your family, Diana? And what about the Duke of Newton? How do you think this will affect him? How do you think this will affect his mother? She will most certainly not approve of this,” he muttered.
“Father, I am sincerely sorry. I never meant for this to happen,” Lady Diana said as tears ran down her cheeks.
Her father walked past them and Lady Diana’s eyes followed him. “Where are you going, Father?”
“To put an end to this, immediately,” he answered without even glancing at her.
Lady Diana stood from the chaise and followed her father down the stairwell, despite her mother calling her back. She followed him outside and froze when she saw that he angrily made his way to the stables.
A hand grabbed her arms and she spun around, looking up into the eyes of her mother.
“Unhand me, Mother,” she hissed.
“Let it be, Diana.”
“I cannot. I love him,” Lady Diana said.
“You do not know what love is,” the Duchess scowled.
“And you do?”
“Diana, listen to me—”
“What is Father going to do?” she asked her mother.
“Knowing your father, he will send him back to Lord Stanley, and forbid him from ever setting foot on the estate grounds,” the Duchess answered.
“It is not fair, Mother,” Lady Diana whispered as tears ran down her cheeks, and she ran back inside.
A short while later she stood at the window of her bedchambers and looked out at the carriage which stood in front of the wrought-iron gates. Her heart broke into a million pieces as she watched Hudson walk to the carriage with the little belongings he had. Before he climbed into the carriage, he glanced up at her window and saw her standing there, watching him. He noticed the sad and tormented expression on her face, and the only thing he wished to do at that moment, which was to embrace her and offer consolation to her, was the one thing he was now forbidden to do. He gave her a knowing nod and climbed into the carriage.
