by Lolah Lace
“Shit, I can’t tell. Stop coming over here.”
“And if I don’t?”
“I will call yo’ baby mama and tell her you still trying to fuck me. Now gone.”
“That’s fucked up.”
“Oh well. You fucked up.” There was silence but I never heard him walk away.
“Do you still love me?”
“Hell naw!”
“Hey, if I catch you out in the parking lot I’m going to take some pussy.”
“Yuck! Leave or I’m calling ‘dem boys on your Black ass.” Calling the police on was the last resort. It would be a very efficient way to get an ex to leave you the hell alone.
“I don’t care. Fuck the police. I’ll come up to your job.”
Dummy, he doesn’t know I changed jobs three months ago. I wasn’t going to give this drama life. This wasn’t the first time he showed up at my door. I knew what he wanted. You don’t get to dump me for someone else and come back and fuck me. Not going to happen.
I made it to work on time. Being late just wasn’t an option for me. I didn’t want the Black people are always late title. I just started this job. It wasn’t anything glamorous but it paid enough to pay my rent and barely my utilities. I needed a roommate or another job. A second job just seemed easier. I lived with another woman once before. That didn’t work out well. I liked having my own place. I just didn’t like paying so much in rent.
This wasn’t my first time on my own. I just wasn’t really prepared to have to pay this amount of rent money all by myself. I would have never renewed the lease if I had known what my future held. My ex left me six months ago. He just packed his stuff and moved in with another woman. A woman that lived in the same apartment complex. Three buildings behind mine. They had been carrying on for over a year.
She just had his baby a few months ago. So every now and them I have to accidentally drive into the adjoining parking lot and see them together. I got over him quickly. I cried at first. It hurt initially but he was so blatantly scandalous with his cheating I couldn’t really hold him in my heart. Plus he didn’t want me. That was just the god’s honest truth. He wanted her. He got her. He could eat a dick and suck the balls.
I never really got mad at her. She was some big booty chick with her double D’s out all the time. She wore tight shit and long weave down to her butt. She wore a ton of make-up and she was every man’s wet dream. We were polar opposites.
There was no way she would be faithful to my ex. She got too much attention from the opposite sex and she loved it. I really think she wanted the check that came with a man that worked a good city job. He was cheap so I know she doesn’t run his paper. When he was my man he held his wallet too damn close. But she can have that rat bastard. Now she has him and all his issues. I don’t care if they both get hit by a truck.
I hit the time clock and went right to work at Lew’s Family Restaurant. I was the newest waitress so they put me at the tables with the worse tippers.
I understand it. It was a seniority thing but it always felt like they were just being assholes for no reason. It didn’t matter. I dealt with it. I worked extra hard to get tips. Without the tips, I would have been evicted from my apartment long ago. I had been trying to go back to college for years. It never happened because I needed to work full time. I had to work odd hours just to make ends meet especially after Dave left me.
I was walking back to the kitchen when I felt a stranger’s hand on my forearm. Quickly my eyes found his. He was touching my bare skin. I hated when customers got all touchy feely. I hated being touched without my consent. I had seen this guy in here before. He was a regular customer. There wasn’t much to him. He was tall, wore a shirt and tie and he was brown like me. He never was seated at my tables so I had zero interaction with him. I wished that were still the case.
I knew better than to get mad with a customer. But I looked down at his hand before I cut my eyes up at him. It was a reflex reaction to rudeness.
He got the hint and let me go. He was a regular customer. He came into the restaurant four or five times a week. He was a good tipper but he didn’t discriminate. He didn’t have a favorite waiter or waitress from what I remember. But I had never been his waitress.
“I wanted to grab a table in your section.” He was smiling. I had never seen him smile.
“Of course sir.” Calling him sir was weird. He looked to be around my age. “Follow me.”
The led the way to one of my free tables. I picked the one near the entrance. I was having a good day despite my ex showing up at my door. I hoped this customer wasn’t going to be a pain. We kind of started off on the wrong foot.
He took a seat in the booth and placed his cell phone on the table. He looked up at me and I forgot what I was going to say.
“Oh, I’m Kelby your server. I will be right back. I need to get you a menu.”
“I don’t need a menu.”
“Oh, so, you’re ready to order?”
“Sure,” he drying added.
I waited for him to speak. I didn’t need a notepad. I had a really good memory.
“Whenever you’re ready, sir.”
“Do you remember me?”
“Ah,” I paused to think about his question. What the hell was he even talking about? “Excuse me.”
“Do you know who I am?”
“A customer.”
He chuckled. “Yes, I am.”
“I’m sorry. I know you’re a regular customer.”
“Yes. I come in here every single day and you never notice me. You never even make eye contact with me.”
“I’m sorry sir. This place is very busy.” What more was there to say? I had a good memory. There was nothing all too extraordinary about him. He looked very common in a room full of common people.
“I can’t believe you don’t know me.”
He was working my last nerve. “Would you like a cup of coffee?” I wanted to end this awkwardness and get on with my job.
“I do want coffee. Kelby we went to high school together.”
“Oh, we did.”
“We had chemistry together.”
“We did?”
“I sat in the front of the class.”
“Oh yeah, I remember now.” I lied. I didn’t remember him.
“It’s okay if you don’t remember me. We didn’t run in the same crowd. You dated that same guy all four years, the basketball player. You guys were glued together. I thought you were going to marry him.”
I hadn’t thought about Marcus in years. He was my first love. We broke up when he went away to college. My father died that summer. This trip down memory lane sucked.
“What would you like me to bring you?”
“Pancake platter and coffee.
“Coming right up.”
I scurried away from my old schoolmate. I tended my other tables and got his food out to him as soon as it was ready.
I didn’t have a ton of customers so I was helping Adele with her orders while she went to the back for more napkins and smoke a cigarette. She was only gone for five minutes.
“Hey, Kelby. I’m back. Boss man wants to see you in his office.”
“Seriously? What now? Could you cover my tables?”
“I got you, babe.”
I left the workroom floor and walked through the kitchen. I passed the lockers in the cramped break room. I knocked on the owner’s open door. Lew looked up from his cluttered desk.
“Adele said you wanted to see me.”
“I do. Have a seat.”
I walked inside and sat on the broken chair in front of his desk. The chair wasn’t really broken as much as it was old. The seat cushion was busted and had gray duck tape all over it. Lew was too cheap to fix anything. Apparently, it never occurred to him to grab a decent chair. One of the many perfectly good chairs that people tossed out by dumpsters.
“What’s up?”
“Kelby, I’m sorry but today has to be your last day.”
; “Last day— what?” His words hadn’t registered.
“Last day working here.”
“Huh? I’m fired?” What the fuck for?
“Fired no. Laid off. I’m not going to block your unemployment.”
“Did I do something?” I had never ever been fired a day in my life.
“I have too many waitresses. I can’t afford you.”
“Okay.” My face reminded calm but I was screaming inside. You fucked up asshole! You barely have enough people working in this dump!
“Clock out at nine. I can cut you your check on Friday.”
“Okay.” I wanted to cry but I was too shocked. I’m sure my tears ducts were empty. No more tears, I used up my tears from all the other bullshit I cried about.
“Just bring your uniform back when you come get your check.”
“Okay.” The only word I could mutter as I thought about how I was going to make ends meet.
I stood and slowly walked away when I felt that he was done with me. I was in a daze. I wasn’t a big drinker but I was going to get fucked up tonight. I just couldn’t believe that bullshit reason he gave me. I literally hadn’t done one thing wrong in the last three months. I was a model employee.
I went to my locker and grabbed my purse and cell phone. I stood by the clock for ten minutes until it read 09:00. I punched the clock and walked through the kitchen. I stepped into the dining room and was headed straight for the front door. Before I could get there I felt Adele’s hand on my shoulder.
“Where are you going?”
“I got fired.” Home was what I meant to say.
“You’re serious?”
“Yes.”
“Bastard. He’s going to hire his fucking niece. I knew it. She is fresh out of rehab. She needs a job.”
I squinted. I didn’t know what she was talking about. I didn’t participate in the restaurant gossip. I didn’t know who was sleeping with who or anything personal about anybody.
“I didn’t know that.”
“Well Kel, they might be hiring at the IHOP on route 39.”
“Thanks.”
“Hey, I need my check.” I heard my customers voice from one table over. I glanced at him. Now I remembered him. He wore glasses in high school. He was in the band. Maybe he played the trumpet. I bolted for the door. Fuck this! I don’t work here anymore. Let someone else take care of my customers.
CHAPTER 2
I needed a stiff drink. I needed a drink three weeks ago but I couldn’t catch up with any of my friends. They were always working, with their kids and living their hectic lives. I didn’t have anything going on. No job, no money, and no real family.
I usually drank with my friend Lahasia. I talked to her every day but she was too busy to come over or meet up. She promised to take me out to dinner. When she finally had time to meet with me I jumped at the chance. I didn’t have anything else to do. I was still very unemployed. I was starting to get depressed about it.
Lahasia picked the place. I didn’t really like the food they served but she was paying so I wasn’t complaining. I had money issues and beggars can’t turn down a free meal. I spotted Lahasia as soon as I entered the restaurant. She was sitting alone at the table and waving me over. I wished I could be as happy as she was. Lahasia was always so positive. Being around her made me feel like I had a chance at turning things around. She helped me get over my ex. I was really hurt when he dumped me. I needed to really stop being so down on myself and so negative in general.
“Hey, girl.” I rushed toward her and gave her our usual hug. I climbed into the bar stool right next to her. I hooked my purse on the hook directly in front of my knees. I always wondered when and who thought of this simple invention. Finding a place to put your purse while sitting at a bar was always a chore. This restaurant and a few others had figured it out. Some of the older restaurants hadn’t caught on yet. My purse wasn’t designer like Lahasia. But I still didn’t want it to be placed on the floor or on top of the nasty bar.
Lahasia was on a whole other level. She had a good job, a nice car and a fabulous condo. She wore designer clothes and shoes. She was hood to death and ride or die. She was all the things you would want in a bestie. We had only been friends for five years but she was my best friend whether she knew it or not.
The evening started with drinks. We caught up on everything and she let me rant about how horrible my life was. She didn’t rant about how great her life was but she didn’t have to. I knew it.
I covered all the basics when I spilled my guts. No job. No college education. Raggedy car. Cheating ex-boyfriend. Dead parents. Rent I can’t afford. I guess she had grown tired of my complaining because she just looked at me and twisted her lips.
“Kelby, I think I have a way to get a few dollars in your pocket.”
“I will take anything that pays more than unemployment and waitressing. No, I’m kidding. I will take anything.”
“It pays more.”
“What, a drug mule for El Chapo?” I joked but Lahasia didn’t seem to think it was funny. “What is it?”
“Before you judge me. I need to you listen.”
“Why would I judge? That’s not even me. You act like I didn’t clean toilets for that man at that damn restaurant that fired me.”
“It’s not cleaning toilets but—”
“But what girl? I need some damn money.”
“Don’t be mad at me.”
“Why would I be mad at you?”
“I have to tell you something and I know you’re going to be looking at me all sideways and crazy.”
I let out a laugh. Why was she stalling? What in the hell was she talking about? “Girl stop.” I took a sip from my frozen margarita.
“I have this part-time job. I work for this escort service.”
“What?”
“It’s a classy escort service. You know what an escort is right?”
“Yes, I know what it is but—” She must have a different understanding of the word than I do.
“It’s like my second part-time job. I sometimes do this, escorting for a little extra cash.”
“Why do you need extra cash?”
She tilted her head. “My son goes to private school. You know I don’t get any help with him.”
Her son’s father was in prison. “You work at an insurance company.” Lahasia had a bachelor’s degree in something business-like. I forgot what exactly.
“Yes, but my life is expensive.”
She was right. She had a kid in private school. He played an instrument, did sports and karate. He went to exclusive summer camps. She had a Lexus, a mortgage and all she ever wore was designer labels from head to toe.
“Kelby, I’m an escort but it’s not a big deal. I offer services, hashtag pussy and get paid. It’s legal in Nevada.”
“We are not in Nevada.” Clearly, we had the same definition for the word escort. “You have sex with strangers.” I wasn’t really asking. My thoughts were just spilling out of my mouth.
“Yes, girl. Technically, I fuck strangers sometimes.”
Her words sunk in. “Lahasia, I wasn’t ready to hear this shit. Girl, hell no. What the fuck?”
“I’m only saying something to you because there is this open job.”
“Escorting?”
“Yes, escorting. I think you should take.”
“Me, Kelby Robin Dozier?” I don’t know why I said my birth name in its entirety.
Lahasia twisted her neck. “You are getting unemployment and that will only last for five more months. Then what? Waiting tables again. Girl bye. You need to go to school.”
“I can’t afford to go to college.”
“If you take this job you can probably take a few classes.”
“What job, hoe-ing?”
She rolled her eyes at me. “Escorting. You can escort.”
“Hell naw. There is no way in hell. You know I can never do something like that.”
“It’s just sex.”
&
nbsp; “With a stranger for money.”
“Yep.”
“First off, it’s illegal. I might as well got a bag a crack and sell it outside the police station.”
“Don’t be so dramatic. We grown as hell.”
“Yes, and you can do you. And I can do me.”
“You are going to be doing homeless.” Her eyes flipped up.
Her words hit me hard because I knew that could be possible. I seriously had to figure something out. I needed my car to work right. There were so many things wrong with it and every time I put it in the shop they told me it was on its last leg. It had two hundred and twenty-four thousand miles on it. I needed a new car. Without a new car, I would just end up losing the next job. The piece of shit car I had was going to go out on me sooner and not later.
“I’m not you.”
“Ain’t nobody me.”
“I don’t have the confidence you have. I don’t have your attitude. I’m barely making it. You own shit. You went to college.”
“Girl my daddy used to beat my mama ass on the regular and he was a damn alcoholic. My childhood wasn’t roses. But I will tell you this. I am determined to have shit. My son will have shit. Don’t you want to show that lowlife Dave you didn’t need him?”
“Nope, I just want to eat.”
“Fine but this pays real money. Just think about it and see what’s up.
“See what?” Some strange man’s dick? Bish bye.
“Before you judge me.”
“I’m not judging you. You do you. Ride a thousand dicks. I can’t do that.”
“I hate when people talk about what they can’t do. Look, there is a guy that wants a girl that isn’t a professional.”
“A guy?”
“Yes, my boss asked me if I knew anyone that was pretty, curvy and sexy but not a pro.”
“Your boss?”
“Yes, my boss. I don’t stand on a damn street corner. I don’t find my clients. I’m matched up with men that prefer a certain type. My boss finds the guys, rich guys. He screens the men. Joe Blow can’t get a date with one of his girls. He makes sure the men have lots of money and they are safe.”
Her words flooded me and I was drowning in ridiculousness. “This is too much. This is not my life.”
