by T. L Smith
My eyes go wide, I’m sure of it. Then my head shakes, not happening. “Get out.”
“Do you want to protect her? Numbers are safer,” Elina says.
“You think I want to live with you? I don’t want to live with anyone… ever. I don’t do people… ever. I stand you because I have to. I prefer the dead. So if anyone comes to mine that are unwelcome, there’s only one way they will end up… on my preferred list, dead.”
Pollie steps away from me, withdrawing. Then I realized what I’ve just said.
“Leave,” I tell them, facing her hurt face. “Now…” I bark louder not even looking at them.
“Pollie…” She looks down, not answering me. “Pollie…” I say again.
I hear the front door close.
“You don’t want me?”
I drop my head. “I think you’re the only thing I do need in this life. I didn’t need anything but my bodies before you, Pollie.”
She nods her head but doesn’t say a word.
Chapter 29
Pollie
“We have to go there today,” I tell him, we spent the night at his house. Anton came back later that day. I think he really likes Dmitry, but he also likes to fuck with him. I can hear the playfulness in his voice. He respects him, and Dmitry just doesn’t realize it yet.
“Where?” he asks walking up behind me. His hands clasp onto my stomach, his head leans into the nook of my neck. Kisses trail up my neck as I wash my hands.
“The house. You can’t ignore them.”
He grumbles against my neck. “Why can’t I just stay locked up with you?”
I don’t dwell too much about what he said last night. He was angry. Plus, he made it up to me—all of last night. My senses, my emotions, all are heightened when he touches me. When he takes me as his.
“They’re your family. Let’s go,” I say pulling away from his touch. His hand grabs hold of mine.
“I don’t need them, though, all I need and want is you. And I will have you, Pollie.”
Laughter bursts from me. “All macho man,” I tease him.
He pulls my hips into his, I can feel he’s ready to go.
I place a kiss on his chin. “Go, now.”
He hisses at me, and I laugh as I pull away and walk to the front door, knowing he will follow me. Just as I pull the door open, I run straight into someone, a woman. Her hands go to my shoulders, holding me upright. I immediately start apologizing, and she laughs at me.
“Sweetheart, no sweat.” Her nails dig into my skin before she removes them. “What beautiful skin you have.” I can feel that she’s closer now, assessing me. I take a step back, waiting for Dmitry to walk out.
“Thank you,” is all I can think to say.
“I’m Amy, and what’s your name?”
“Pollie.” Her hand comes up and holds my hand lifting it up. She rubs the surface of it, and when I try to pull it away, she holds harder not letting me go.
“Drop her hand, Amy.” Dmitry’s voice blares from behind me. She does as he says, her nails scraping along my hand. I feel as she pushes past me, brushing me to the side.
“Sebastian told me where you live now.” I can hear her heels clicking on the floor as she walks around me. “It’s been too long, lover. Too long. No need for me now that you have a doll?”
I know she’s looking at me. I hear the sound of a zipper opening. My mouth drops, I hope I’m hearing things.
“Pull your shirt back up.”
“You know I can play with more than just you. She can join in. I would love to play with her skin. Tell me, have you marked it yet?”
He doesn’t respond, and her heels click closer to me. They come to stop when she’s in front of me. She grabs my hand, lifts it, and places it on her skin. When I realize it’s her breast, I try to pull away, but she won’t let me.
“Can you feel the scars? That’s all him. Do you have them?” She runs my hand up and down her breasts, her voice changes direction as she speaks to Dmitry. “Think of the possibilities, don’t you want it?”
“Dmitry…” I say, pulling my hand away harder. Tugging at it.
“I miss it,” I hear the small voice coming from him.
I drop my head and feel with my left hand for the door handle. When I find it open, I walk out. Not stopping as I almost break into a jog, listening to the traffic surrounding me. When I feel I am far enough away, I stop. Pull my phone from my ear and call Elina.
****
“Pull over,” I scream. Elina pulls the car over, and I manage to push the door open just in time for my stomach to empty itself.
“Are you sick?” she asks me.
I shake my head. I haven’t been.
“Are you pregnant?” She laughs as I shut the door and she drives off.
My eyes go wide.
How long ago was my last period?
Shit. Fuck. I cover my mouth.
“Fuck, I was kidding.” She pulls the car hard to the right, my head bangs on the window.
“Elina,” I say rubbing my head. “What’s gotten into you?”
She stops the car, and I hear the car door slam. I wait, unsure of what’s happening. Then as soon as she’s back, she throws a box at me.
“My house or yours?” she says starting the car.
“What is it?”
“Pregnancy test.”
“I can’t be. I don’t want to be. I mean… gosh… I don’t even know.”
“We don’t know anything yet. Just wait, I’m pulling into yours now.”
She stops the car, and I take a shaky step down. Every emotion running through me.
What will I do if I am?
Would he want a child?
What happens if he hates me?
Then I remember the anger from before and don’t care what he wants because it’s more about me than him.
After moving inside, Elina says, “Pee on this.” She places a stick into my hand, and I nod my head and walk to the bathroom, almost in a daze. When I sit on the toilet, nothing happens, then the door opens and a tap starts running. “Water helps,” Elina says not moving.
I drop my head into my hands and try to not think of why I’m sitting on a toilet trying to pee with a woman watching and waiting for me. “Pee already. Before he tracks me here, and busts open your door,” she says referring to Kazier.
I laugh and start to pee placing the stick between my legs then holding it out once I’m done. Elina takes it from my hands while I finish up.
“Two minutes,” she chimes just as her phone starts ringing. “Yeah, yeah, she’s with me.” I wait for her finish. “It’s Kazier, Death went to his looking for you.”
“You didn’t tell him where we are, did you?”
“No, but what happened? You were working things out yesterday, weren’t you?”
I shrug my shoulders. “We were until she showed up.”
“It’s positive, Pollie.”
“Fuck!” I swear leaving the bathroom. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” I say again.
Elina laughs behind me. “You’re swearing… out loud. I take it you aren’t happy?”
“I need to see a doctor.”
“Yes, you do. We need to see how far along you are.” Banging starts on my front door. “Shit!” she says walking away and leaving me to sit on the bed. My head’s hurting, too much information now running rampant in my head.
“Where is she?” I hear his voice come through the walls then his footsteps as he walks to where I am.
I lay down on the bed and don’t move. Right now, I couldn’t care less what he says.
“Pollie, I told you last time not to leave me like that.” I don’t answer him, and stay where I am, lying on the bed. My hands cling to the sheets, my head is almost hanging over the side the bed. “Pollie…” he speaks his voice getting closer. “Pollie… answer me?”
I don’t, there’s no need to. I hear Elina, she doesn’t say a word as she walks in and sits beside me.
“What did you do
now?” she asks him. He snarls at her and storms off. I hear the bathroom door shut, and that makes me jump up. I run straight to it and smack into his chest.
“Elina, leave,” he says while my hands grip onto his chest. I can feel his breathing, and it’s becoming harder and harder, I can hear it being forced through his nostrils. I remove my hands and take a step back.
“Pollie, do you want me to leave?” Elina asks ignoring Dmitry’s anger in his voice.
“It’s fine,” I say to him, to her, but more to myself. I listen as she walks out. Her heels tapping on the floor and then the front door shuts.
Chapter 30
Death aka Dmitry
She backs away slowly, her hands to her sides. My eyes go back to the stick in my hand. I may not be up with everyday normal, but this stick, I know exactly what it is.
“How was your friend?” she snaps walking away from me. “Didn’t stay to play?”
I love the sound of venom in her voice—jealousy at its best. “You left. Again. Even after we had this talk last time.”
Her spine stiffens at my comment, she walks to the sound of my voice and throws a punch to my chest. “You wanted her.” Another punch.
“No, I didn’t. I said I missed it. If you would’ve stayed a second longer, you would’ve known that.”
“If I can’t fulfill you then it’s not going to work.”
I grip her arm, holding it tightly. “Tell me what you want? Tell me, Pollie?” I can hear the anguish in my voice as I ask her.
She looks down to the floor. Not speaking for a few seconds then she says, “I just want you. I want you to want me to be enough.”
“You are enough,” I tell her because she is.
“I don’t associate with death, Dmitry. I associate with life.”
My hands grip her face. “Don’t you see… you are what brings life into me? Do you even realize it? Every time you breathe near me, it fills my soul, sparking life back into me. Only you can do that.”
“I’m pregnant, and it’s yours.”
I cock my head at that. “I sure as shit hope to fucking God it’s mine, woman.”
Her lips twitch up at me. “Do you even want kids?” she asks me.
The answer to that is simple, no. Hell to the fuck, no. I don’t want to bring in any kids into this life of mine, not a hope in a hell. This life is nothing but torture, depression, darkness. Apart from Pollie, that is. I look up to her, she bites her lip as she waits for my answer. So innocent, so sweet. She has no idea. A child that would come from her, I have no doubt would be fine with the amount of ‘love’ she would give. Even if that word doesn’t mean shit to me, it does to her.
“No,” I answer her truthfully. Her face drops, her lip red now from biting it. “Dark, Pollie, dark is all I am. You want a kid around that?”
Her head starts shaking no.
“You cut me, do you remember that? Any sane woman wouldn’t have stepped within feet of you after that. But I could feel something you kept hidden from everyone else. Something that was only there when I was around. So yes, I want to have kids with you. This kid in particular.” Her hand touches her belly. “So now it’s your turn. Give me the chance that I have given you. It will work because we work. Anything that comes from us will work.’’
My eyes close tightly. Why must she crawl inside me like she does?
“Pack your shit, you’re moving out,” I say to her.
A smile etches on her face, she knows she’s won this round, so far.
I watch as she moves, walking slowly to her bag, then pauses. I can feel her uncertainty. She shouldn’t have any, none at all. I would give her my last breath if I could. “Don’t hesitate, stop thinking, Pollie.” She nods her head and starts to pack her bag throwing as many clothes into it as possible, then she’s offering me her hand. I take it, knowing I’m keeping her for life.
****
“I think we should try it,” Pollie says lying next to me. The doctor just left and checked for a fetal heartbeat. I heard the fetal heartbeat of my child. That still amazes me. And makes me want to cut my own throat from these feelings I have, for something that I don’t understand.
“Try what?” I ask her. She brushes her fingers over her stomach being in as much shock as me, her eyes starting to tear. It was the last thing both of us expected. Especially me. No one brings children around me, it’s the truth. Yet, here we are, wanting to bring one into the world, and calling it our own.
“Blood play,” she answers. Her fingers stop moving on her belly, and I begin to shake my head.
“Not in this fucking life, your skin is to not be harmed.”
“Seriously, what are you going to think when this baby pushes my skin out? I’ll get stretch marks, marring this skin. What happens if I cut myself, and leave a scar? Will you still want me then?”
It doesn’t take me long to answer. “Yes, of course, but it will never happen under my hands.”
“Why can’t I cut you?”
I think about that for a second. Then reach over and pull a knife from the drawer. I sit up on the bed, removing my clothes, then my hands touch her hips and pull her pants off along with her panties and then her top. She moves with me, no words needed as I undress her. I take her waist lifting her from the bed and placing her on my lap. She wiggles and I slap her ass to keep her still.
“Hand.” She raises her hand—palm upward—I place the knife into it, and her palm closes around it. “Steady,” I tell her bringing it down, just to the right of my chest. Her hand begins to shake and I pause, she steadies herself taking a deep breath. “Just enough to draw blood.” She nods her head, and the coolness of the knife’s blade touches my skin. “Slice, Pollie.”
Her head shakes, no. But her hands move. Her first cut is so small that only a droplet of blood squeezes out. I ask her to do it again, but she shakes her head.
“I don’t like it. I don’t want to hurt you like that.”
“You bite me, Pollie, drawing blood. Don’t deny you don’t like it. I feel the way your body reacts to it.” She starts to scoot downward, her hands coming between us. She inserts my cock into her, her head going back when I’m fully inside her.
“I’ll bite you, Death.” Her voice is sexual. Turned on. She starts to move, riding back and forth, back and forth. Her arms go behind her, holding my thighs. Her hair dangles freely, touching my legs. Her breasts so full, bounce every move she moves. She may be the calm to my storm, but she brings the lightning without even realizing it.
I sit up, wrapping my arms around her, she lets me. Her head staying back, I pull her hair to my neck, she leans forward and bites down hard. Then again, and again. Rocking, and bobbing into me. Like I’m her last meal. I could fuck her every day, and never get sick of it, or sick of her. She is like nothing else. And it’s pure joy to have her.
****
“Dmitry,” Pollie’s voice calls down to me.
I’m draining a body. She knows and won’t step a foot through the door. I rinse my hands and walk up the stairs. As soon as I reach the doorway, my feet move fast, my heart hammers in my chest. “Dmitry…” Her voice sounds again, she won’t stop me. My hands are around his throat, his head slams back into the wall, his eyes go wide.
“Let him speak, Dmitry.” Her voice now closer. Smoother. Calming. I take a deep breath, and my grip loosens but doesn’t dissolve.
“Why are you here? Do you want to be downstairs?” I ask him. His hand taps my hand, telling me to loosen. I do but only minutely, just enough for him to speak.
“I came to apologize, I’m going back to Russia. I have to clean up his mess.”
“Apologize?” I scoff at him.
“His hands wouldn’t have ever been on her if you hadn’t said anything.”
Sebastian’s eyes look over to Pollie, and I squeeze tighter. His eyes leave her. “Have you told her how you feel, Dmitry? Don’t be like him. Tell her.”
My hand drops from his throat, I point to the door. “Out, or
you won’t ever leave here again.”
He nods and looks back to me one last time before he walks out closing the door behind him. I turn to Pollie who’s just standing there.
“Do I need to tell you?” I ask as she steps closer toward the sound of my voice.
“I’m a woman, Dmitry. We always need the words.”
I shake my head at her. Place her hand on my heart. “It beats just for you. If you die, I’ll follow. You know that, right?”
She nods her head. “You die, I die. Got it?” She smirks at me.
“I would hunt you if someone took you. I would find you, and I would destroy anybody in my way.”
“Got it!” She laughs this time.
“You want that fucking word, don’t you?” I roll my eyes at her.
“Just once. Say it just once for me,” she begs. She has asked me several times over the last few days for that word to be uttered from my mouth.
“Does it really mean that much to you?”
“Yes. And I want to record it, so I can play it back every time I think you’re being and ass, and threating to kill everyone for me.” Her hands start feeling around the table for her phone, she presses a few buttons and holds the phone up to my mouth. “Tell me, handsome, tell me.”
“I, Dmitry Smirnov… love you, Pollie… soon to be Smirnov.”
She drops the phone to the floor. Her mouth open wide. “Is that? Is that?” She can’t finish her question. I grab her hand and slide a ring onto her finger, tears leaving her eyes and traveling down her cheeks. “Hold up. You only putting a ring on it because I’m knocked up?”
“No. The ring is so I can keep you… and fuck you… anytime I want.”
“Well, that’s a given.” She laughs pushing her hips into mine, and she places a kiss up to my lips with a smile on her face. “One more time…” her mouth moves against mine, “…say it, one more time.”
“Love you, Pollie.”
She squeals and jumps into my arms, wrapping her legs around me.
I know I’m going to get laid tonight, now that’s a given.
Chapter 31
Dmitry aka Death
Pollie’s belly is bigger now. She’s just moved from her first trimester, which is meant to be the scariest. Her tits are my dream land—so plump, so sensitive.
