Billie approved, “If you are absolutely sure, I guess it wouldn’t hurt my career any.” She got on the bus. They sat down and she took out her recorder.
He admitted, “Maybe it’s time for me to tell the truth. That was all a ploy to get you in here. I want you to stay and have a few drinks.”
Billie lectured, “I think you have had enough already.”
He taunted, “I thought you wanted to help me?”
Billie objected, “That’s not what I meant. I have been misunderstood a lot lately.”
Chris snapped, “Is that how you managed to help Bobby Douglas?”
She declared, “I think it's time for me to leave. I will try to talk to you when it is you and not the booze talking.”
Billie did finish her report and had it printed. She thought about all of the hard work that was put into her efforts with Bobby and Kelly. It all paid off. She also thought about her one night stand with him. It was a close call that Chris didn’t find out, or Kelly. She had to make sure that it remained a secret.
The summer was almost over. It would soon be time for the local fair. There were fairs all over the United States, but the ones in the Nashville area pulled in more country acts. Billie enjoyed the fairs most of all. It gave her some of the same advantages that fan fair did. She found out that an act called The Baker Brothers, were scheduled to be Chris’ opening act. Billie thought maybe he had changed his mind and decided to continue touring after all. Either that or they haven’t been informed of his sudden career move. Chris would also be at one of the local fairs. That was unusual to Billie. He was known for his concerts in civic centers, auditoriums, and superdomes. She had to once again witness the mood swings of Chris Brady.
Billie was still upset with Chris for his behavior with her. He made her feel very uncomfortable. She was only beginning to learn how appearances could be deceiving. She had never imagined that Bobby Douglas would ever have to fight to save his marriage. Or that Chris Brady would end his marriage, and have a sick mind. But, she could forgive Chris. He was only lashing out or going through the motions. He was still hurting from his divorce and didn’t really know how to handle it. His alcohol intake, however, was no excuse. It had to be the only comfort he received. In his eyes, the bottle wouldn’t let him down. She hoped to help him with his drinking problem. She just had to decide between AA, or some kind of divorce therapy. It was obviously too late for marriage counseling.
She attended the Chris Brady event, not sure of the turnout. She received a message from him to meet after the show. She thought he might end up apologizing. She was right. He told her he was sorry for his behavior. He wanted to make it up to her. He invited her out to dinner. Who would turn down dinner with Chris Brady? Chris emphasized, “I need to get out in public more often. People start to wonder about you if you are always closed in at home. This is good for my image. Besides, I want Lana to know I am getting on with my life.”
Billie challenged, “Since when did you care what people are thinking? Do you think that will make Lana take you back?”
Chris argued, “I do not want her back. She could come crawling back on her hands and knees, and I wouldn't blink an eye. She had her chance to be with me forever. She practically spit on me the last time that I saw her. It was like being hit below the belt. I was in love with her and now I can't stand her. I want to hurt her the way that she hurt me.”
Billie assured, “I don't think you should do something that you will regret later on. Just keep a positive attitude. I know you have the strength to do it.”
Chris mumbled, “At least someone is confident.”
Billie articulated, “You have to be at some point in your life. I was curious about something. If you and Lana had decided to have kids, would she have left you? She may have had harsh feelings about the fact that you shared a child with another woman. Maybe that was the true root of the problem.”
Chris laughed, “Are you kidding? What, and ruin her perfect figure? I don't believe it. I know that it was agreed upon by the two of us, but I would have been thrilled if she would have become pregnant. But, it may have made things worse if we still ended up getting divorced. Custody battles are so dirty.”
Billie related, “I know how they start out, too. I had to stand by and watch Bobby Douglas almost lose his little boy and girl.”
Chris requested, “Now I would like to ask you a question, if you don't mind. What made you want to come here with me today? Just for a story?”
She declared, “I was hoping we'd end our feud. I really like you and admire your work. I don’t like being in turmoil with anyone that I have to work with at some point. I love Nashville and I am generally a nice person, I think. I can make friends with just about any country artist.”
Chris commented, “A real humanitarian, huh? What else should I know about you?”
She joked, “Maybe you will find out the next time we cross paths.” Once they had finished dessert, Chris dropped her off at her place. He promised to plan another meeting at least that was what he chose to call it.
Billie didn't want to go out with Chris. That was the last thing that she needed. She couldn't date someone with so much extra baggage. She could only work with him. No one was tearing down her door with offers, but her career had to come first. Billie wanted to be with someone else, but he was taken. Chris, however, was free and unattached. She had never pictured herself with him, and figured it was best not to, no matter how tempting. She did start to spend more time with him, to give him advice and support when he needed it. He slowly started to act like his old self again. Billie knew he was a sensitive guy at heart. He had stopped drinking as much around her. She didn’t know for sure if he had quit. She wanted to find out.
She decided to go over to his place one night, unannounced. She found his spare key and was thankful the alarm was not set. When she entered, she noticed his guitar. He normally took it with him where ever he went. She thought he may have just stepped out momentarily to grab some dinner. She tried to look for something that could tell her if he was still drinking. She didn't want to look around while he was there. Before she had the chance to check Chris’ bedroom, she heard him pull in to the drive way. When he came in, he was carrying a large suitcase. It was similar to his guitar case. He asked her what she was doing there. He guessed how she got in, and he didn’t seem too upset. She couldn’t believe he didn’t want to have her arrested for Breaking and Entering. He did want her to let him know the next time she decided to drop in though. She didn't get the opportunity to see what he brought in before he put it in his room.
He came in the den where Billie was seated. He turned on the DVD player and TV. He insisted, “There is a recording that I made a few days ago, that I want you to see.” She watched it, only to find out that he had changed his mind again, about retiring. She thought he had given up on that ridiculous idea.
Billie pleaded, “You promised me that you would think it completely through before making a major decision.”
Chris maintained, “I'll still write songs and maybe produce or direct a few music videos. Whatever good benefits present themselves. I may even advance further on my acting career, do more reality TV.”
Billie appealed, “Have you thought about your band? They have some say in this. Besides, acting is not the greatest option for a country singer. That is really the only reason they even bother to give parts out in the first place. If you are hot in the music industry, you can help them out, boost their ratings. They earn much more from profits than the entertainer actually does.”
Chris notified, “I see that you clearly do not agree with my decision. I am sorry, but it is my life. I have to do what is best for me. There isn't much more I can do to make you understand how I feel.”
Billie knew he was right and couldn’t argue about it. She just wanted to drop the subject. Chris seemed too wrapped up in something else, so she told him she had to go home. He gave her the DVD and told her to watch it again. He wanted her to
realize once and for all that he was serious. The DVD that he gave her could end up on television any day. It could hurt a lot of people, mainly his fans. How could something like this happen? Just as she asked that question, she received a phone call from an old friend from North Carolina. She found out that her old boyfriend was getting married. Billie was shocked. She knew it was only a matter of time. He would marry eventually, but it was too soon for her. She always pictured herself with him, even though she never did anything to make sure that would happen. She didn't want to go to the wedding. She wouldn't be able to stand by as some other woman married her first true love. It was making her so upset, that she couldn't help but to cry. It was like everything that was going on with her at that time was all coming together. She was tired of holding it all inside.
Chris tried all of the next week to get in touch with Billie. He was not aware of the pain she was going through. Billie was trying to bury herself in her work, to forget about the wedding taking place in the near future. Her assignments helped a little, but when she came home at night, that was when it hit her. Finally, Chris caught up with her. He could tell she wasn't in a very good mood. He told her to go to his place and talk out her problem with him. He said he might be able to help. Billie needed the company; she just hoped she wouldn't break down in front of him.
When she walked in his house, she started to feel better. She started to tell him about what she found out that week. Chris claimed, “I can relate. Lana left that same scar. It feels like you have lost your last chance at ever being happy, doesn't it? Were you in love with this guy?”
Billie answered, “At one time I thought I was. Maybe I still have unresolved feelings for him. I don't even know why I am letting it get to me. I am usually much stronger than this.”
Chris vowed, “It is perfectly normal to feel that way. You saw how I handled my breakup with Lana. If I can get over her, I know you can do the same.”
Billie smiled, “Thanks for trying to make me feel a little better. I forgot to ask you why you have been calling me all week.”
Chris noted, “It's not important right now. I just wanted to see if you were interested in doing something useful with the DVD I gave you. If you'd rather not discuss it, I completely understand.”
Billie decided to tell him her idea. She conveyed, “This week, I did think about your decision a lot. You were right. It is yours to make. I should let you do as you please. Which network do you want to get a copy of the DVD?”
He announced, “I don't think I will have it aired just yet. I am glad that you have accepted the fact now. If you are afraid that I am making a mistake, don't be. I would be making an even bigger one if I kept going on the way that I have. To be honest, I can no longer sing songs that I have written that have to do with my failed marriage. I can’t sing a lie, and I can’t live a lie. The truth has gone out of my songs. Except maybe the first songs I wrote, I could now agree with some of those lyrics."
She finally could see what he meant. He was right about singing songs that no longer had the same meaning. How was he to take anything serious that way? Billie asked him when he was going to really quit. He predicted, “I will at least wait until my new video and song have left the charts. I am not really looking forward to the press’ reaction. But, they can kiss my...” With a feeling of relief, Billie could continue her work and not feel depressed. She couldn't help but worry about Chris, but could never imagine Ricky Todd retiring. That was a scary thought.
Billie was not looking forward to the weeks ahead, when Chris was ending his career. Country music, as the world knew it, was about to change. There was a bit of pressure at work pertaining to that situation. Mr. Reid wanted all of the information that she had, but it was to remain confidential. No one could know his decision until he was ready to go public. It seemed like time was passing by slowly. Chris' new song was moving ever so steadily up the charts. Billie wished he would still possibly change his mind and decide to deal with singing the tough songs. She knew that it was the best thing for him, but that it would break a lot of young girl’s hearts. Billie's was one of them.
Just when it seemed things couldn't get any worse, that was when news got out about Lana Howard's shocking new movie. Billie figured it wouldn't be long after their divorce, that Lana would start making movies again. She may not have cared what Chris thought about it. But, Billie did. She tried to get in touch with him to see how he was handling it. When she did get to speak to him, he sounded all right. But, Billie couldn't tell if he was really doing well. Before she had the chance to go and see for herself, she was given an assignment. It was hard for her to imagine why she was chosen for this particular one. She assumed Mr. Reid set it up, so maybe then he would find out the inside story for himself.
Billie had to interview Ben Matthews, the director that Lana was dating. She wanted to tell Chris about it, but she was sure that he wouldn't like it too much. He might insist on being there or show up on his own and cause a scene. Billie figured it was the perfect opportunity to see if Lana had unresolved feelings for Chris. Billie didn’t have to go too far to get her interview. They happened to be in town, and all she had to do was show up on time. Once she arrived, she scanned the room for Lana. While she was looking around, a man approached her, who seemed to be curious. He introduced himself as Ben Matthews. Billie was there really to talk to him, so she didn't have much of a choice. Maybe it would be somewhat productive and informative.
As Billie proceeded with her one-on-one report, she thought of how Lana betrayed Chris, and all for this man. She did not find him attractive or very interesting. Billie wanted to stir up some untouchable type topics. She asked him how Lana was coping with her divorce and how he felt about the situation. Ben was struggling to find the words. Billie thought he wasn't prepared to answer a direct question, such as that one. But, what he told her was not what she expected to hear. He wanted it to be off the record. Billie was supposed to get the whole story, but she had to know for Chris' sake. Ben explained his side of the story. He told Billie that Lana was truly unhappy when she was with Chris. He said Chris would mistreat her and that it was his idea that they not have children. Billie didn’t know if that was true. That didn't sound like the same Chris that she knew. She asked to talk to Lana. He said she wouldn't be back for a while. She wanted to stick around until Lana did return. Maybe then she would get a real interview.
Before Lana arrived, Billie got a text message. It was Chris trying to get in touch with her. She called him and could tell right away that he was upset. He had found out about Lana being in town and admitted he couldn't think about anything but a drink. She had to be there for him, so he wouldn't be constantly turning to alcohol when he was feeling down. She left her card with Ben and told him to give it to Lana. She made sure to let him know that it was imperative that she speak to Lana.
Chris was not in the best state of mind, but she was able to get more than a sentence out of him. She may have told him some news that he didn't really need to hear. He couldn't believe that Billie had talked to Ben about him and Lana. She couldn't tell him what Ben had said though. Or that she planned on questioning Lana. Chris suggested that they stop talking about the events of the day. Just as Billie was concerned for Chris' well being, he seemed just as concerned for hers. He offered her a massage, since he could tell that she was tense. Billie worried that he might be able to sense that she was keeping something from him. He advised her to change in to something comfortable for her massage.
Billie came back to the living room and he told her to lie on the table. He started massaging her neck and shoulders. After a few minutes, he pulled her robe up to the middle of her thighs. He began spreading warm oil on her ankles and calves. He pulled her robe over the small of her back next. With a circular motion, he applied the oil to her hips. His palms moved down between her thighs, as if to be caressing her. He slid his arm under her body just above the hips, and began to massage her lower back with the heel of his hand. It was very arousi
ng to her. He could tell. He removed her robe and dipped his hands in to the oil. This was the first time a massage had affected her like that. Not too much later, it became more than a massage. It was bound to happen sooner or later. It happened before Billie really had a chance to think about it. She wouldn't regret this night, like the one she had with Bobby. Before they went to sleep, Chris whispered, “Anytime that you are feeling tense again, you know who to call.”
Billie awoke to find that Chris had left. She decided to make the most of it. One thing that occurred to her was finding the suitcase he had put away the other night. She was still curious to know what it contained. She looked everywhere, but was unsuccessful. She had seen him set it in his room. “He must have moved it to some private place. What could be more private than his bedroom?” Billie thought. Then again, she had gained access to it, so it wasn't so private after all.
Chris came back and surprised her. Billie observed, “I thought you had left for the day?”
He instructed, “Today is your day off, am I right? So, we're going to spend it together.” She was stunned, but wasted no time to jump at his offer. She wanted to find out where they were going. As they drew closer to their destination, she noticed that it looked a lot like the location of Lana's new movie. He explained the plan. “Don't get the wrong idea. I want Lana to know that I am through with her for good. You and I are together now. I am not in any way using you to get her back. I swear,” He told Billie.
When he said that they were together, she thought that was news to her. She guessed it wasn’t just sex to him then. But, she would save that conversation for later. She grilled, “Is that the only reason? Or do you want to punch Ben's lights out?”
He reassured, “There's no need to get violent. You only end up fighting someone that you are jealous of, which I am not. He has nothing that I want. He's not worth it.” Billie was glad to hear that. What she was wondering was if Lana would welcome them.
The Right Side of Memphis Page 4
